Chapter 8: Cross The Line

Saturday, July 2nd, 2016

Mikan hugged Hotaru tightly. "I'll miss you."

Hotaru rolled her eyes. "It's one week. We normally don't see each other for nine months. This will seem like nothing."

Mikan leaned back and smiled at her best friend. "Say hi to Ren-san and Lina-san for me, please. Have fun in Hong Kong!"

Hotaru smirked, her eyes shining with some secret amusement. "Enjoy yourself while I'm gone and behave." Glancing down the steps leading from the front porch to the long driveway, she added, "I expect a full report of how you occupied yourself when I get back."

Below them, Ruka and Natsume stood next to the sleek black car parked in front of the vacation house. Saki-san was already in the back while Honzo-san sat ready and waiting in the driver's seat as the young people said their goodbyes. Ruka smiled pleasantly at his best friend. "Please don't waste this chance. At the very least, spend some time with her and figure things out. I swear, if we get back and I find out that you shut yourself in the house reading manga and playing video games the entire week without even seeing her, I will never speak to you again."

Natsume stared blandly back at him. "I won't lose any sleep over that threat."

"I'm serious," Ruka warned, though he was still smiling. "Don't think that this is all about you. I'm positive that Mikan-chan has feelings for you, too, but she's not the type to act on it first and she shouldn't have to be."

Natsume sighed and looked Ruka in the eyes. "You should keep in mind that I care about the baka, too. Whether I choose to move things along with her or leave things be, it'll be because it's what I want and what I think is best for her, too."

Ruka grinned. "Now that I'll trust." Looking up, he saw Hotaru headed down the steps towards the car. He held the door open for her before sliding in next to her. He rolled down the window to throw Natsume one last mischievous grin. "Good luck!"

Natsume rolled his eyes, but offered his best friend a smile and a fist bump through the open window. "Good luck yourself." He headed back towards the house to stand next to Mikan on the front porch. The girl waved enthusiastically as the car began to pull away, shouting well wishes to her friends. She didn't drop her hand until the car had disappeared from view.

Mikan sighed. "Well, there go the rest of them." Aoi and Kaoru-san had left a couple hours earlier accompanied by two of the Hyuuga household staff, hoping to reach Tokyo by dinnertime.

Natsume nodded. His mother had offered for him to return to Tokyo with them after finding out that Ruka, Hotaru, and Saki-san would also be gone. When he'd told her that he'd rather just stay in Makikawa for the week, she'd smiled and told him that was fine with her. There were plenty of staff left to run the house anyway. She simply asked that he let someone know when he came and went, and asked him to call or text her as usual if he needed anything.

Mikan flashed him a smile. "I guess I'll head home then."

"Okay," Natsume answered simply. Mikan skipped down the steps and waved cheerfully at him over her shoulder. He watched her silently for a minute before heading inside. He'd already worked out that morning and they'd just had lunch a short while ago, so he headed upstairs to relax with a manga or a video game.

Natsume spent the entire afternoon and evening that way, intent on not completely giving in to the expectations of his friends and his little sister. After all, he was Hyuuga Natsume and he didn't like to be manipulated. He preferred to do what he wanted, when he wanted. If he happened to think about Mikan and wonder what she was doing, he simply shoved the thoughts aside. He had plenty to do without her, so getting together with her could wait. Besides, she didn't come by or try to reach him on his cell phone, so she was probably busy, too.

He lasted one day.

Sunday evening after dinner, he shoved a manga in his back pocket, let Komaki-san know that he was leaving, and headed for the temple. The sky was overcast, making it feel later than it really was. When he arrived, the main courtyard was deserted and no one answered the door when he knocked. Following the gravel path, he found Sakura-ojii-san tending his herb garden. The old priest looked up when he heard Natsume approach and smiled broadly.

"Well, hello there, Natsume-kun. How are you this evening?

Natsume nodded. "I'm well, sir, and you?"

Sakura-ojii-san chuckled. "My old bones can feel the rain coming." He tilted his head behind him and said, "Mikan-chan is practicing her archery if you'd like to join her."

Natsume's face noticeably relaxed. "Thank you, sir."

Sakura-ojii-san nodded, watching the teenage boy continue down the path. It pleased him immensely that his dear granddaughter had caught the eye of such a fine young man, but he knew Natsume well enough to keep his thoughts to himself. He chuckled softly as he remembered Yuka and Izumi's budding romance in their younger days.

Natsume turned the corner at the back of the temple in time to see Mikan's arrow thud securely into the inner ring of one of half-a-dozen targets at the far end of the small archery range. According to Mikan, it was rarely used for competitions, but since she occasionally had to fire an arrow as part of a ceremony or special event, she practiced there when she had the time. She paid him no notice as he ascended the steps to the archery dojo. He sat on the wooden floor of the wide room with his back to the wall and pulled out his manga. He watched as Mikan notched another arrow. She must have been taking her practice rather seriously since she'd bothered to dress in her traditional practice uniform comprised of a white short-sleeved keiko-gi and navy blue hakama tied with an obi, and white split-toed socks called "tabi" on her feet. She stood in front of an entire wall of sliding doors that stood completely open, revealing the practice targets outside.

They passed the time quietly as Mikan practiced and Natsume alternated between reading his manga and watching her. After Mikan had shot all of her arrows and retrieved them three times, she set down her bow and stretched out on her back in the middle of the dojo floor like a starfish.

"Uh! That is so much harder than it looks."

Natsume smirked. "Your face looks funny when you concentrate that hard."

Mikan leaned her head back to stick her tongue out at him. "It's not the same as dancing. I can do big movements—things that use my whole body or at least my arms and legs—but I stink at detailed stuff. I'm not like Hotaru; she's good with her hands and I'm just… not."

Natsume shut his manga, set it on the floor beside him, and stood up. "You're actually a pretty good shot."

Mikan snorted. "Yeah, because I'm focusing like my life depends on it." She watched from the floor as Natsume picked up her bow, notched an arrow, and let it fly. It hit the third ring from the center of her practice target. Mikan growled lightly. "See? You just basically scored my average shot and I'll bet that I practice 10 times more than you!"

Natsume set down the bow and moved to sit next to her. "Some people are better at gross motor skills, some people are better at fine motor skills. You're better at gross and Imai is better at fine."

Mikan raised an eyebrow at him. "So which are you?"

Natsume smirked. "I'm good at both."

Mikan rolled her eyes. "Of course you are." She stretched. "Well, at least my fine motor skills are good enough to cook with." She stood up. "I'm going to get a snack. I'll be right back."

Natsume retrieved his arrow while Mikan fetched a couple of cold water bottles and a bento from the kitchen. The two sat on the edge of the dojo watching the dark, cloudy sky as Mikan opened up the bento.

"I made this for Jii-chan to have while he was out yesterday, but a family ended up treating him to lunch, so he didn't need it. It'll go to waste if it doesn't get eaten," she explained.

Natsume eyed the assortment of foods with amusement. "Why'd you cut his apples like bunnies and his sausages like octopus? He's a grown man, Polka Dots."

Mikan smiled brightly. "I thought it'd be cute." She picked up one of the apple bunnies and took a bite.

Natsume ate an octopus sausage off the end of a pick, then used the pick to skewer a piece of bacon-wrapped asparagus. He hummed appreciatively as he chewed. "Not bad, Polka Dots."

She giggled. "Anything with bacon makes you happy." She looked at him thoughtfully. "You know, I could probably sprinkle cayenne on those to make them spicy."

Natsume raised his eyebrows. "Now that sounds good."

When they'd finished most of the bento, Mikan snapped the lid back on and set it aside. She leaned back on her hands as she stared out across the archery range in the ever darkening twilight. Suddenly, she leaned forward and grabbed Natsume's arm while she pointed with her other hand. "Look, Natsume! Fireflies!"

Sure enough, tiny yellow glows could be seen lighting up and disappearing again here and there. Natsume smirked. The baka is so easily amused…

Mikan turned to him with a grin. "Do you remember when we were nine and we had that firefly catching contest? We all thought we were doing so well—"

"—until Imai showed us her jar," Natsume interrupted, shaking his head at the memory. He could still remember it because of how surprised they'd all been that Hotaru had quietly caught so many more of the bugs than the rest of them and they hadn't even noticed. The look on Ruka's face had been priceless. Mikan, of course, had been thoroughly impressed and had excitedly congratulated Hotaru on her victory.

Mikan laughed. "She really is amazing. Ruka-pyon looked so scandalized that someone had beaten him at a contest involving animals."

Natsume snorted. "Bugs shouldn't count as animals."

"They do to Ruka-pyon."

Natsume smirked, knowing that she was right.

Mikan smiled. It's nice having Natsume around, she thought warmly. "So," she began as she leaned back on her hands again, "do you want to do something tomorrow?"

Natsume shrugged nonchalantly. "Do you have something in mind?" He didn't mention that he'd been hoping to spend the next day with her anyway.

"The forecast says it's not supposed to rain until tomorrow evening, so I was thinking about going for a hike in the morning. I haven't been all the way to the top in ages."

Natsume quirked an eyebrow at her. "That's at least a four hour hike there and back. What time do you want to head out?"

Mikan hummed thoughtfully. "Maybe 7 so that we can avoid the heat? Since Hotaru's not here, we can start early."

Natsume nodded. "I'll be here at 7 then."

Mikan grinned. "Great! It's a date." Her choice of words made Natsume's heart skip a beat and he mentally scolded himself for his involuntary reaction.

The next morning, Natsume met Mikan at the temple at 7 a.m. as promised. The sky was still heavily clouded, providing a nice break from the summer sunshine as the two friends made their way up the rocky, wooded slopes of the central mountain. As predicted, it took them just under two hours to make it to the top. The view was positively spectacular and Mikan insisted that they snap a picture together on her phone to show their friends. The climb down took a bit longer. Along the way, they saw several Sika deer, a fox, two raccoon dogs, a Japanese serow with its baby, and countless woodland critters including birds, bats, squirrels, hares, and even a weasel. Although Natsume wasn't nearly as much of an animal person as Ruka, he enjoyed Mikan's enthusiasm; she'd lived in this area her entire life, yet she still got so excited when she spotted the native wildlife. She nearly melted when they spotted the baby serow with its mother.

They were both sweaty and tired when they reached the valley. Since the temple was closer than the vacation house, they headed there for lunch. As they ate, Sakura-ojii-san listened delightedly to Mikan recounting their hike and the various creatures they'd encountered. Natsume chimed in here and there, but left most of the talking to Mikan. After lunch, Mikan took a quick shower before changing into her swim suit, shorts, and a tank top. When Natsume saw what she was wearing, he cocked an eyebrow and asked her, "Are you planning on swimming?"

Mikan smiled. "I thought it might be nice since it gets so hot in the afternoons." Natsume nodded. In his mind, he wondered what exactly they would do swimming alone together. He honestly couldn't remember if it had ever happened before.

As they walked to the vacation house, they noticed that the wind had picked up strongly and the clouds had grown even darker and heavier while they'd been at the temple. By the time the house came into view, they could see lightning over the ocean in the distance. They made it inside just as the first raindrops began to fall.

"Well, so much for swimming," Mikan sighed as she looked out the window. "I guess the forecast was wrong."

"Good thing we were off the mountain before this hit," Natsume commented as he stood next to her watching the rain.

Mikan nodded. "Yeah, you don't want to be caught up there in weather like this."

Natsume glanced at her. "Isn't that how you broke your arm a few years ago?"

Mikan smiled nostalgically. "Yep. I was 11 and my class went for a hike together on a Saturday. We weren't even halfway up the mountain when the rain started falling unexpectedly. The teachers would have rescheduled if the forecast had mentioned the possibility of rain, but it swept in so suddenly that we had no warning. I slipped on a rock and fell." She turned to him with a grin. "The whole class signed my cast. It was awesome."

Natsume rolled his eyes. "Sometimes, I think your optimism borders on delusional."

Mikan bumped his shoulder playfully. "It's better than being gloomy and cynical." Walking past him, she headed for the stairs. "So what do you want to do? Watch something, read, play a game…?"

Natsume followed her up the staircase. "I'm going to take a quick shower first and change, then let's watch something. What are you in the mood for?"

Mikan clicked her tongue. "How about an anime? We mostly watched movies weekend before last and then again on Monday after… well, after I killed that dog," she trailed off quietly. Natsume watched her expression fall slightly. Their sleepover that night had worked well at distracting her, but he knew that it would always be a bad memory for her. He chose not to comment, knowing that there was nothing new that he could say. Mikan knew that she'd done what she'd had to do, but she still felt awful about taking a life, even the life of an animal.

Natsume continued on with the main conversation. "Have you seen The Devil is a Part-Timer!? That's the next short series that I was going to watch. Koko said it was good."

Mikan glanced at him skeptically. "Is it a supernatural horror show?"

Natsume snorted. "If it was, I wouldn't have suggested it."

"Okay, okay! I just heard the word 'devil' and wanted to make sure."

"It's a comedy."

Mikan smiled. "That sounds great."

It didn't take long for Natsume to get cleaned up while Mikan waited in the home theater. The pair set up the anime on the projector screen and got comfortable on the couch. Natsume thought that the first episode was pretty funny, but noticed that Mikan wasn't laughing the way she normally would. He subtly watched her face as they began the second episode. Her expression was impassive, almost uncomfortable, and Natsume found himself suddenly wondering if the anime had nothing to do with her unusual behavior.

Is she nervous sitting here alone with me? Is she really that uncomfortable? Natsume's thoughts baffled and frustrated him. He just couldn't comprehend what was so drastically different about being alone on a couch watching TV than spending time alone together anywhere else. When they made it halfway through the second episode without Mikan saying a word, he suddenly picked up the remote and clicked the pause button. Turning to Mikan, he asked bluntly, "What's wrong?"

Mikan blinked at him. "Huh?"

Natsume frowned. "You're being quiet. You're never quiet when we watch TV. What's wrong?"

Her answer both surprised and relieved him. "My neck hurts," Mikan admitted sheepishly. "Actually, my shoulders and back are bothering me, too. I'm not sure what I did, but they're really uncomfortable." She winced as she lifted a hand to squeeze the tight flesh between her neck and shoulder.

Natsume cocked an eyebrow. "Were they bothering you while we were hiking?" He reached a hand out to finger her neck, searching for knots.

"No, that's just it, I felt fine all the way until I got out of the shower, but now I'm all achy and my head hurts." She grimaced when Natsume's fingers hit a sore spot. He slid closer to her so that he could use both hands to search the area.

"Damn, Polka Dots, no wonder you're sore. Your muscles are super tight. Were you paying attention to your posture when you practiced last night? Or did you sleep funny?" Mikan shook her head slightly. "Well, whatever you did, I'm sure climbing a mountain didn't help," he remarked dryly. "Put your hair up." After Mikan put her long hair up in a simple messy bun, he nudged her forward so that she was sitting closer to the edge of the couch, giving him enough room to sit behind her. He clicked the play button on the remote before slowly working his thumbs into the knots around her neck. Mikan hissed quietly now and then whenever he found an especially painful spot. By the end of the episode, he was ready to move beyond her neck.

"Take your shirt off."

Mikan slowly turned around to glare at him suspiciously with narrowed eyes and pursed lips. Natsume rolled his eyes at her. "You're wearing your swim suit underneath, right? I can't massage your back and shoulders as well through your shirt. It slides around too much."

"Fine, but that sounded really perverted," she muttered. She pulled her shirt off and tossed it onto the couch next to them as the third episode began. Natsume smirked as he continued to work out her tension. She was right, it had sounded perverted, but he'd been honest about his motives. Of course, that didn't stop him from enjoying himself while he was at it. He'd seen her in her bikini top numerous times, but he didn't often get to touch her so much. This close to her, he could smell the scent of her shampoo coming off of her freshly washed hair, a robust mix of raspberries and tangerines. Since she couldn't see his face, he openly smiled at how her it was.

Natsume kept at it through the third episode. When he shifted her swim suit straps off her shoulders, Mikan tensed, but when all he did was massage the tight flesh they'd been covering, she relaxed again. Trust Natsume to be so bold, she thought, blushing lightly. Truth be told, the longer Natsume massaged her, the more she began to relax and enjoy it. At first, it was painful as he worked out each individual knot, but now that he was past that point, his movements felt soothing and her headache was almost completely gone. It never ceased to amaze her how incredibly warm his hands always felt. As they slowly rubbed, squeezed, and pushed away the tension in her back, neck, and shoulders, Mikan thought she wouldn't mind this lasting forever. Natsume's touch was lulling her into a euphoric state as the fourth episode of the anime played across the projector screen.

When he was finished, Natsume slid her bikini straps back into place, picked up the remote, and clicked the pause button. "How's that, Polka Dots? Feel better?"

Mikan's mind was pleasantly hazy. She felt wonderful, completely comfortable, and full of warmth, gratitude, and affection for Natsume. Being more of a feeler than a thinker, in her relaxed state, she did exactly what she felt like doing, without question or hesitation.

She turned to Natsume, took his face in both of her hands, and kissed him full on the mouth.

Natsume froze in shock, his eyes wide. The two seconds that it took his mind to catch up with what was happening were enough for Mikan's mind to catch up, too. The same instant that he relaxed, her eyes flew open and she jerked away from him, her hands hovering in mid-air as if she were preparing to surrender. She stared at him horrified. "I am so sorry." For a split-second, Natsume's heart froze in his chest. "I shouldn't have done that without permission. I am so, so sorry. I can't believe I just did that without asking first…"

Relief swept over him that she was panicking because she hadn't asked his permission first, not because she hadn't actually wanted to kiss him. Natsume rolled his eyes. "Shut up, Polka Dots," he said before pressing his lips against hers, one arm winding its way around her waist while his other hand gently held the side of her neck, his thumb resting on her jaw line. Mikan's reaction was similar to his; she froze in surprise for two heartbeats before her stiffness melted away. She closed her eyes and let her hands come to rest on his shoulders.

They kissed quietly for over a minute. Neither of them had ever done this before, so their kisses were light and experimental, each of them savoring the sensation of their lips against one another, enjoying the taste and the closeness and the mix of exhilaration in their chests and nerves in the pit of their stomachs. When they drew away from each other, Natsume saw hesitation reflected in Mikan's amber eyes. "Was that okay?" he asked her softly.

Mikan nodded, her cheeks flushed a rosy shade of pink. "Was it okay for you?" she asked timidly and Natsume recognized that her anxiety came from wondering what he thought. He gazed back at her solemnly.

"It was okay for me, too. More than okay."

Mikan's blush darkened and the corners of her lips twitched as if she were trying hard not to smile. She quickly turned around to face the projector screen again. Natsume moved out from behind her to resume his original position on the couch. He picked up the remote and pressed the play button as Mikan put on her shirt and pulled her knees up to her chin, wrapping her arms around her legs. As the opening theme began to play, she glanced at Natsume. "Did we really just kiss?"

Natsume nodded once, keeping his eyes firmly on the screen. Mikan grinned. "I can't believe we just kissed! That was my first, you know."

"Mine, too," Natsume replied calmly.

Mikan's jaw dropped. She pressed her hands to her cheeks. "Oh, Natsume, I'm so sorry—"

"Don't," Natsume warned her seriously, turning to look at her steadily. "Don't spoil it, Polka Dots. I did exactly what I wanted to do, regardless of who started it."

His firm reassurance eased her guilty conscience and warmed her heart. She smiled at him and softly said, "Okay." As her eyes returned to the screen, she still couldn't help thinking, We just kissed. Natsume and I just kissed! She hadn't planned it or expected it, but she was glad that it had happened because right now, she felt overwhelmingly happy. There were dozens of butterflies ricocheting around her insides and her lips felt almost tingly from their kisses.

Beside her, Natsume's calm exterior was perfectly masking that inside, his mind was reeling. He could feel his pulse thrumming through his veins. I just kissed Sakura Mikan… and she kissed me first. He was in serious danger of outright grinning. He glanced at Mikan. She was smiling broadly as she watched the anime. Natsume reached his arm around her, pulled her against his side, and allowed himself to smile. Mikan snuggled beside him happily.

Neither of them mentioned their shared kisses throughout the rest of the afternoon and evening. They continued to lounge in front of the TV, eventually asking Futaka-san to send up a pizza for dinner, as the storm raged on outside. When it finally let up shortly after 8, Mikan announced that she should try to get home while she could. Natsume asked Ikeda-san, a young man in his mid-twenties who served primarily as one of the Hyuuga's drivers, to take them back to the temple so that they could avoid the wet ground. When the car stopped in front of the temple gate, Mikan smiled at him as Ikeda-san got out of the car and came around to open her door for her. "I had fun today."

Natsume nodded. "Me, too." He felt the urge to lean forward and kiss her goodnight well up inside him, but he lost his chance in the moment that he hesitated. Mikan was out of the car, thanking Ikeda-san, and calling "Goodnight!" to him over her shoulder before he'd made up his mind.

As Ikeda-san drove him home, Natsume closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headrest. He knew that they'd crossed a line today and his mother had always warned him that once you cross a line, it's very difficult to go back and very easy to be tempted forward. He sighed deeply. He needed to do some serious thinking. He couldn't afford to be as driven by his emotions as Mikan was by hers, but he didn't want to completely give up on his feelings for her either. As he replayed his long day with her in his mind from their small adventure hiking the mountain to their relaxed afternoon on the couch to their very first kiss, in his heart, he couldn't deny that he longed for more days like today…

…days with Sakura Mikan.

An hour later, Natsume lay in bed reading a manga when his cell phone rang. Glancing at the caller ID, he set his book aside and answered it. "Hi, Okaa-san."

"Hey, hon! I just wanted to check in and see how you're doing. How's Makikawa?"

"Rainy," he answered. "How's Tokyo?"

"It hasn't changed," his mother told him. "You should have seen Aoi-chan and Nobara-chan reunite yesterday. You'd think they hadn't seen each other in a year instead of just five weeks. Yoichi-kun was there when I dropped her off. He asked me to say 'hi' to you."

"Of course he did," Natsume said, sounding pleased. Hijiri Yoichi was one of Aoi and Nobara's closest friends. He'd always idolized Natsume and Natsume in turn had taken a real shine to the boy over the years. He was a good kid, similar to Natsume in a lot of ways. Most importantly, he really cared about Aoi and stood by her, which had earned him more respect and acceptance from Natsume than his personality alone ever could.

"How's Otou-san?" Natsume continued.

"Oh, you know your father. He's buried under work, but he just keeps smiling and plugging along," Kaoru-san told her son. Natsume smiled at the familiar affection in his mother's voice when she talked about his father. "How's Mikan-chan?" she asked.

Natsume's eyebrows drew together as he stared at his bedroom ceiling and slid his free hand under his head. The girl had been at the front of his mind since they'd parted ways earlier and he'd ended up trying to distract himself with his manga after his thoughts got him nowhere. He decided to answer his mother honestly, but simply. "She's fine. We went for a hike this morning and she came over to watch TV today."

"Uh-huh," Kaoru-san answered, her voice laced with suspicion. "You definitely paused before answering that question. What's up? Is everything okay between you and my second daughter?"

Natsume grimaced. "I'm glad you love her, but I'm very glad that she's not my sister."

"Oh?" his mother asked and Natsume could have smacked himself when he heard the pleased and interested tone enter her voice. Even without seeing her, he could imagine the look on her face, complete with raised eyebrows and a wide grin. "And why would it bother you if she were your sister?"

Natsume sighed, neatly caught. He knew better than to try to pull the wool over his mother's eyes, and frankly, he knew that she wouldn't be at all surprised by his feelings for the baka. He could still remember the way that she'd grinned and pointed out to her close friend, Saki-san, that he and Mikan were holding hands at the end of the Summer Solstice Festival a couple weeks ago.

"Because it would make my feelings for her really awkward."

"And what feelings are those?"

Natsume couldn't help hesitating. He'd never been great at discussing his emotions even with his mom, but if he was going to open up to someone and get their advice on this situation, she would definitely be the person he'd choose. Ruka was his best friend, but Natsume already knew his stance on the matter and it hadn't helped him make any decisions. His mom, on the other hand, was a knowledgeable and experienced adult who had more than earned his trust and respect throughout the years. She also knew both of them and was familiar with his life back home in Tokyo.

A bit unsure of himself, Natsume spoke softly and slowly into the phone. "I like her, Okaa-san… a lot... more than any other girl..." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "But I can't be with her and I just… I want to be, but it's not possible. I've thought about it over and over and I just can't see a way to make it work, but I hate the idea of giving up without even trying—giving her up without even trying. Being this close to her…" He paused, surprised by the painful tightening sensation in his chest. "Being this close to her without knowing where exactly we're trying to go is driving me crazy."

"Okay, tell me two things," his mother spoke up when his silence told her that he was finished. "Firstly, why are you so sure that you two can't be together?"

Natsume answered without hesitation. "I can't move here and she can't move to Tokyo. Even if she could, can you imagine dragging Polka Dots into our world? Can you really see the baka putting on airs and dealing with all of the politics? Always having to watch herself, always trying not to step on the wrong toes, preserve the right relationships, maintain the right image? All of the manners and the expectations… She's so far above all of that…stuff, I just can't imagine her conforming to it all. I don't want to imagine her conforming to it." His voice had grown stronger, revealing his conviction. "She'd either get eaten alive or lose herself completely and end up feeling like a bird in a cage."

"Hmm…" his mother hummed skeptically. "I think you underestimate her in that regard, so let's scale back to your first point. I get why you can't move there, but when you say that she can't move here, what do you really mean?"

Natsume frowned, considering her question. "I guess I mean that she wouldn't move to Tokyo. She loves Makikawa."

His curiosity peaked when his mother chuckled. "Again, I think you underestimate her. She does love her home, but she also has a bright, adventurous spirit. Have you ever asked her what her plans are for after high school?"

Natsume snorted. "Knowing her, she probably hasn't even thought about it."

"Exactly. You don't know if she'll stay in Makikawa or go off to college somewhere (maybe even Tokyo) or what she'll do, and neither does she. While you have a very clearly defined future ahead of you, Mikan-chan's future isn't like that. She's not the heir to a major corporation requiring a very specific educational background. She can do anything she wants, so who's to say that she can't or won't end up in Tokyo someday? I can understand your concern—and it's very thoughtful of you to consider her feelings—but I don't think it's wise to completely eliminate your chances of being together based on something so uncertain."

Her words hit Natsume harder than he'd expected. She sounded so confident, straightforward, and rational. He'd been so sure of himself in thinking that Mikan would simply never leave Makikawa, but in less than a minute, his mother had completely shattered his assumption.

"Okay," he accepted her assurance for now. "What's your second question?"

"You mentioned wanting to know where the two of you are trying to go. If I'm wrong, correct me, but I took that to mean that you want to know if the two of you are headed towards friendship or more than friendship. So my question is 'Why do you need to know that in advance?' Why can't you just explore your feelings for each other and see where things go?"

Natsume blinked. "Because you and Otou-san taught me to always think ahead to the outcomes and consequences of my actions."

Kaoru-san laughed. "Touché! But Natsume-kun, this is where Mikan-chan is truly a special case. You're right, if we were talking about one of the girls at your school here in Tokyo, you'd have to be more cautious. You'd have to really know what you're getting yourself into before moving beyond just friendship—who her parents are, what their family and business' connections are to HDI and/or its associates, how you behave with each other in certain social circles, etc.—but Mikan and Makikawa are separate from all of that. She's just a girl, a being in and unto herself, without any ties or connections to Tokyo high society that you have to take into account." Her voice held a twinge of some strange emotion that Natsume couldn't identify when she made that statement, but he didn't say anything as she continued.

"You don't have to watch your every move in Makikawa the way you do here. That's one of the reasons that your father and I have made it such a priority for you and Aoi-chan to spend your summers there, to get away from Tokyo for a couple months each year so that you can both just be kids for awhile, un-scrutinized by the people around you. That's even truer for you this week without the rest of us there with you. You have a rare chance to test the waters with Mikan-chan, to open yourself up to her and just see where things go without anyone else's eyes on you. This is just my advice and you're free to take it or leave it, but I think that your best option is to just let loose, stop worrying, and enjoy being with the girl you like. Who knows what you'll discover? You might not like her as much as you think you do, or alternatively, you might find that she's worth facing any obstacle to be with. Maybe she likes you back and maybe she doesn't. No matter what happens, at least you won't be left with the regret of never trying to find out."

Natsume was speechless. His mom had literally just told him to set all of his worries and anxiety aside and just go with it. He almost wanted to laugh. She really was amazing.

"So I should just go with it?" His expression cleared into a bemused smile as the heavy sensation in his chest was replaced by warmth.

He could hear the smile in his mother's voice. "Just go with it, son."


Author's Note: Pictures of a traditional female archery uniform, Japanese archery dojo, and some of the animals they saw while hiking are on the Chapter 8 board of the This Is High School Pinterest page.