"Aaand, wrap that up and give it to a child on Christmas! 'Cause we're done!"
Roxanne turned and looked up at the gigantic, rotating tribute to Metro Man sadly. She hadn't had enough time to herself at the funeral, feeling an obligation to stay near the family. So far there hadn't been a good time to go express her feelings privately and to really say goodbye. Now she felt pulled to go inside the museum and just be alone. "Ok. See you tomorrow, Hal."
"Roxie, wait! I'm having a party at my house. It's gonna be like, off the hook or whatever. You should come over." He looked at her hopefully. Since she wasn't Metro Man's girlfriend anymore, he knew he finally had a chance.
The last thing Roxanne wanted right now was to have to fend off Hal's unwanted attentions. Again. "I don't know, Hal. I don't really feel like being around a bunch of people." Does he not remember I was just watching my supposed boyfriend be buried today?
"No, no, no! That's the best part - it'll be like, just you and me."
Silently staring at him, she realized the 'party' meant 'them'. Is he serious? Ok, this is creeping me out. "Wow. Uh. That's certainly, uh, that's very… tempting."
"But I did hire a wedding photographer. That's just in case we were like, something crazy happened. And you wanted a picture of it, for like, to keep it forever, like a memory, you know."
Roxanne's face betrayed her disbelief and extreme uneasiness. He was seriously deluded. "Um, I'm going to pass." She began backing up the steps. "I have some work here I need to do."
"So Thursday instead? Soft Thursday?" Roxie was so sweet to everyone, he was sure he could get her to say yes if he just pressured her enough. She wouldn't turn him down forever. Not Roxanne. She wasn't as cold as other girls who acted like heartless…
"Goodnight, Hal."
"It's a soft yes on Thursday."
She was climbing the steps, determined not to respond. If I just keep going, I won't have to say no outright, but I won't have said yes. Hal's persistence was more than annoying now. He was beginning to become more subtly aggressive in pursuing her, completely ignoring answers he didn't want to hear. What she really wanted was to rip him a new one and take him down a few pegs but, no, that wouldn't be wise. After Wayne's death, he hadn't even allowed twenty-four hours to pass before asking her out, and he had just become pushier since. She really felt it was crossing the border into harassment now, but confronting him was a disagreeable idea. Whenever she toyed with the idea of reporting it, a little warning bell sounded in her head telling her he'd be the type to retaliate or at least become very unpleasant to work with afterward, not to mention all the office gossip and messiness that would inevitably follow.
As she reached the top step, she heard him angrily cursing as he slammed the door of the van. She looked back and watched the vehicle driving erratically away. Sighing, she knew she would have to deal with the situation eventually. Maybe she ought to approach her boss about it confidentially first, just to let someone know what was happening. Just in case.
Slowly she walked into the building. It was near closing, but she only wanted a few minutes, some time to be quiet and alone with the memories of her former friend in this place dedicated to him. Thinking more kindly of him now, she passed meditatively through the corridors filled with information spots about his unique abilities and his career, remembering all the times she'd been held captive, waiting for a rescue and knowing he would come. Yes, he'd been self-centered, but he never once let her down.
It really had all been a game to both of them. She saw it clearly now. I guess it was to me too. I knew I wasn't in danger. Admit it, Roxanne, you were in on it. You liked what it did for your career. It's not as though Megamind was the only one acting a part during all that. Once again, she felt a pang of sadness and wondered where he might be and if he had any remorse or was at least realizing what a mistake it had been destroying his rival, not knowing that as she exited the elevator he was opposite her coming out of the second lift, preparing to make his own goodbyes.
"I've made a horrible mistake." He walked to the railing, the bouquet of yellow flowers that signified friendship clutched tightly in his hand. "She was right. I didn't mean to destroy you. I mean! I meant to destroy you… but I didn't think it would really work." Finally he could admit to himself he'd been as shocked as anyone when the huge skeleton plastered him to the floor. The first realization that he'd actually won a battle had been so exhilarating, it had taken him these past couple weeks to finally admit what he had lost - a friend. Or at least a friendly rival. Metro Man could have killed him outright many times. Not that that would have fit in with his image as a hero, but Megamind knew the real reason neither of them harmed the other was because, in the end, they both thrived on the antagonism they shared. "What's the point of being bad when there's no good to try to stop you?" That was what he'd decided was his destiny all those years ago, to be the bad guy, the force that good needed to oppose. And now it was no more. And it was his fault. And seemingly Roxanne hated him. He slumped dejectedly.
"What are we supposed to do?" Depressingly, her research had reached a dead end. She'd been over everything, there was nothing new to glean from those books, and yet she still was at a loss to sift the facts from the information she did have. "Without you, evil is running rampant through the streets." It was disheartening that no one in the whole city would stand up to Megamind. Not the police or mayor, not anyone. What made someone a hero anyway? Did it only come with having super strength? Laser vision? Well, she thought, I'm as bad as anyone else. What have I done to stand up to him? What can I do? Using her own skills hadn't gotten her very far as yet. "Someone has to stop Megamind." Would someone standing up to him begin to make him understand that being evil was a waste of his talents? Not likely, she frowned, if with all his superior intellect he hadn't learned by now. If only he'd stop pretending and harness those abilities he has for something good.
"Hey, we're closing soon."
Roxanne jumped at the unexpected interruption of her private musings, her hand flying to her chest. "Oh! You scared me! Barry... right?" Blushing, she realized she'd been talking aloud.
"Bernard," came the dry, deliberate correction.
Great. Now I suppose he'll be even more put out with me for getting his name wrong. "Bernard. I was… well, I was talking to myself. You probably think I'm a little bit nuts."
"I'm not allowed to insult guests directly." His hooded eyes passed over her, clearly agreeing with her self-evaluation.
"Uh, thank you." No need to be direct, buddy. You get your message across just fine. "Bernard, I'll just be another minute."
Heaving a dramatic sigh, he clearly expressed his annoyance with her delay in leaving. "Okay…"
"Thanks." She managed a brief smile. I will be nice to that man if it kills me. I may need him yet. Watching him push the cart of familiar books away, she thought, yet another person whose motives I can't figure out. Maybe the truth is I just don't know people as well as I think I do. Maybe Megamind really is just plain old evil, and Bernard just likes being a jerk. She looked at Metro Man's statue, slowly turning her way with that smug grin. So what does that make you?
"I had so many evil plans in the works." He mused over a few of the many different plots and inventions he and Minion had been working on, put on hold indefinitely now that Metro Man was gone. They'd always kept many irons in the fire at once, partly because Megamind's incredibly fecund mind never stopped coming up with fresh ideas and partly because not all of them worked. Developing several inspirations simultaneously allowed things to sort themselves out somewhat. The better ideas rose to the top while the sinkers sunk, and yet they had little lag time between successive plans. That was how he liked it, keeping the enemy on his toes. He smiled thinking of the fun they'd had, then just as quickly he sobered and felt his heart drop into his boots. The great rival, his perfect foil, was no more. "Battles we will never have…" Wayne had understood the game. He had been one of his only friends, if he could be considered a friend at all. He had so very few, he couldn't afford to not claim him as one. All too late though.
Roxanne heard the sound of a stifled sob echo through the open space, bouncing off the smooth, curving walls. Who was that? Perking up her ears, she tried to catch the sound again. Someone was talking, but she couldn't make out words. Who would be here so late? I must be as nuts as Bernard thinks I am. That almost sounds like… Megamind? She began to stalk along the catwalk slowly, almost fearful of finding out.
"You know, I never had the chance to say goodbye. So, it's good that we have this time now, you know, before I destroy the place." He flipped open the detonator and depressed the button to start the countdown. "No offense. It just brings back too many painful memories." Dropping bouquet and detonator box toward the brainbots working on loading the base of the memorial with explosives, he took one last look at his rival's stony face, smiling in perpetuity.
"Hello? Hello?"
The question reverberated in the air, startling him. Hs eyes flew open as he recognized the voice. "Roxanne!" He thought she'd left. He'd seen the news van drive away before coming over. Looking down he realized he was about to be caught in his pajamas and slippers. Ok, he'd seen her in hers, but she looked cute. He just looked… ridiculous. Panic set in as he broke into a run, watching behind him to see how close she was. A completely calm, logical voice at the back of his mind coldly informed him it was past time to have Minion redesign his sleepwear, and suddenly he slammed full force into a solid object. "Ooaf!"
"That's a pretty tasteless costume." Bernard had seen a lot of cosplayers over the years. This guy's hazard sign speckled outfit didn't even come close to being a good depiction of Megamind's badass leather and lightning bolt ensemble. His cape even appeared to be made from a satin sheet tied at the neck. He sneered.
"Costume?" Geesh, was it even worse than he thought?
Evaluating the spectacle before him further, he added, "Megamind's head is not that grossly exaggerated."
Grossly… all right, that's just uncalled for. Pulling out the dehydration gun, he looked back again to see if Roxanne was in view yet, and decided this unsavory person would have to do as a temporary facade. She was going to come around the corner and discover him at any moment! He scanned the man, who looked completely unimpressed and sighed condescendingly.
"Uhhh, and you've made a cheap replica of his dehydration gun." Megamind looked down at his favorite pistol and back at Bernard crossly. You deserve this. "How won-" The man was instantly desiccated as he heard Roxanne again, very near now.
"Hello? Is someone there?" A flash of light up ahead caused her to pause. What was that? That looked really familiar…
As he fumbled the cube from hand to hand, the feeling of panic rose up choking in his throat. Hurry! Hurry! A pair of glasses and a cell phone remained behind on the cart, so he grabbed them up quickly and turned on the disguise generator. He shoved the glasses on crookedly, rising up stiff and still just as her steps sounded behind him. Did she see it? I'm so dead! Oh, the cube! He tucked it into a jacket pocket.
"Oh! Whew! It's just you, Bernard!"
"Oh yes! It's just me… Ber-naard…" What an asinine name. And I forgot to record the voice! Maybe she won't notice. I wonder how well she knows him. Grimacing at his mistake, he nervously straightened the glasses and began to walk quickly toward the elevator, keeping his face carefully away from her. Despite the disguise, he felt exposed and vulnerable, as though she might see through it all at any time.
Roxanne was oddly relieved. Of course it wasn't Megamind. She'd been thinking about him far too much lately if she was starting to imagine him everywhere. "Well, thank you for letting me stay."
"Look, I wouldn't stay any longer than two minutes and thirty-seven seconds if I were you." We have got to get out of here. He began pounding the call button desperately. "We're having the walls and ceiling removed."
"Wow, that sounds like… quite the renovation." Definitely Bernard's style of telling someone to leave. Apparently he had no patience when it came to ending his shift. "Guess I'll catch a ride down with you then." She jumped into the elevator just as the doors began to close. Maybe I can try again to get his help. Was that really him I heard before? It sounded like he was upset.
Megamind had just breathed a sigh of relief seeing the doors sliding together when she suddenly slipped between them. Oh no. This is it. She has me trapped. She knows! Roxanne sighed, and he glanced at her nervously from the corner of his eye. If she started in on him today of all days, he wasn't sure if he could take it. I don't have the knock out spray. Maybe I can just stick my fingers in my ears and hum until the elevator stops and then make a run for it. He stole a peek at her again. She didn't look like she was about to attack him. Why is it that this woman intimidates me so much? She's only beautiful. And slightly brilliant. And...
"I kept thinking he was going do one of his last minute escapes."
Oh no… She doesn't know it's me, and she wants to talk to this Bernard about him. He looked up at the memorial again. This is almost worse. His shoulders slumped hearing the subtle admiration of the former hero in her voice, but he'd actually wondered the same thing when the Death Ray had first hit the observatory. And now, he even wished it had been true.
"Yeah. He was really good at those," he admitted despondently.
"Oh, if only the world had a reset button."
Wow, she'd thought of that too? "I've looked into the reset button." While Minion was out, he'd tried working out the concept on paper, wondering if he could somehow return things to the way they'd been pre-Death Ray and then find some excuse to reduce its power, but it was hopeless. "The science is impossible." All his best work, now useless. His destiny, the purpose of his life – forever unfulfilled. Suddenly overwhelmed by despair, he stumbled out of the elevator, trying to stay in control of his feelings. I am not going to break down in front of Roxanne even if I am in disguise!
She stayed right behind him as they continued walking and stepped onto the escalator. "Bernard… I had no idea you had… feelings. Are you all right?" He's grieving. That's why he's been such a grouch. This totally makes sense. He's been dedicated to knowing everything about Metro Man and Megamind's lives, and he's devastated at the loss of his hero. Of course.
"Metro Man's gone and now there's no one left to challenge Megamind." Who's going to assume that role and fulfill my destiny? No one.
"Oh, come on, Bernard. As long as there's evil, good will rise up against it." With a supportive hand on his shoulder, she tried to encourage him. He pulled away a little at first as though he wasn't used to being touched.
"Oh, I wish."
"I believe someone's going to stand up to Megamind," she stated determinedly.
"You really think so?"
"Yeah. It's like they say." She stepped off the moving stairway. "Heroes aren't born; they're made."
I've never heard that before... Wait. "Heroes can be made." A dim light appeared in his bleak thoughts and slowly began to glow with brighter intensity, clearing away his clouded thinking like the sun burning off fog from the lake. "That's it! All you need are the right ingredients." He glanced at Roxanne, realizing she might not be thinking of this idea the same way he was.
"Yeah! Bravery."
"Yes."
"Strength!"
"Of course!"
"Determination," she added, warming up to her idea more and more. She looked at the statues of past heroes standing in this section of the hall. Not all of them had had super powers. Yes, heroism came from the heart. Anyone could be a hero.
"Imperative!" My determination. He turned and spotted the molecular model he'd been thinking of all along. "And a smidgeon of DNA," he murmured, touching it reverently. "Oh with that, anyone can be a hero!" I wonder if Minion saved that cape?
"Yeah!" She hadn't heard him mention the DNA, but she noticed the astounding change in his mood. He's like an entirely different person now. Poor guy. He must have really been low. As he picked her up excitedly and swung her around, she had a fleeting feeling that something else was different about him, but she couldn't put her finger on what it was. He certainly was excited about this idea, his green eyes lit up like stars. Without that horridly sarcastic attitude, he's actually kind of attractive.
Far from being intimidated now, he almost felt like kissing her again he was so grateful for her inspiration and the new optimism it gave him. The beeping of his watch caused him to pause and comment instead, "I think we should run now!" Cutting it way too close here...
Laughing, she assumed he was being funny about closing time again until he grabbed her hand and actually began jogging quickly toward the exit with her in tow. Why the rush? He's certainly punctual about getting off work. Maybe they don't pay him much. Or maybe he has a night job he has to get to, she guessed as they quickly went out the doors and down the front steps. Maybe he's even married. She looked for a ring while with a shrill whistle, he hailed a passing taxi. She asked, "So, could you help me out some time with that research I mentioned? I really need someone else's point of view on this, and you're the best person I can think of to consult. I'm sure you're very busy," she conceded, wondering if he really was trying to hold down two jobs, "but I wouldn't need a great deal of your time." She turned the full force of her best "pretty please" expression on him.
"Huh? Oh," he said, noticing her beguiling eyes. "Of course. Any time." Hopefully Bernard will know what she's talking about. Lucky guy. Regarding her a little longer, he couldn't help smiling. Maybe he'd just hang onto Bernard's cube for a while longer and see what this research she was doing was all about. Last time she'd been looking into his dehydration gun. Who knew what she was up to now, and it was in his best interests to find out, right?
"What's your cell?"
He looked at her blankly. Cell. Not prison cell. She must mean the phone. He offered her the device from his pocket as he opened the taxi door and waited.
Ok, she thought. Some people do have trouble remembering their cell phone number. Finding it quickly, she memorized it and put her own on his list as well and handed it back. Then she got into the taxi and smiled up at him. "Thank you, Bernard. You've really given me a feeling of… hopefulness again."
"As you have to me," he purred to her sincerely and closed the door. He waved. You have no idea. "Bye!" The taxi pulled away from the curb, and he sighed with relief. Thankfully the place hadn't blown up before she'd left. He turned toward the museum again and twisted the disguise off. "Time to put the past behind us! Only the future…" The explosion almost knocked him off his feet, and he suddenly recalled the terror of being too near the factory destroyed by the Death Ray. "OH! I'm too close!" He scrambled this way and that, dodging falling chunks of concrete. "I'm genuinely scared right now! I hope nobody's seeing this!" Abruptly he began laughing as he ran, the wonderful new idea Roxanne had given him and the adrenaline rush of another near miss again making him giddy.
Sorry, readers! I feel I failed to make good on my promise for a little more action here. Holi-day planning and celebrations, sick kids, late nights have me off my game. (Excuses, excuses, Hunger...) I'm excited to go on and explore the hidden Bernard dates next though. Family responsibilities permitting. And can I just say I have been chatting with some of the most wonderful people here. Some of you know I will gladly spend time chit-chatting in private messages when I shouldn't even be online (like at 3:30am HA!). You people are the best! You make this place so fun! Please review, readers! I need to feel the luuuuuve...
Newest recommended fic: 'Put Another Nickel In' by Nora Salisbury. Go pee first. Seriously.
