Dear Draco,

Why are you such a git? I mean really? You are nothing but a pain in the ass git with his nose so far up in the air that I'm surprised you haven't drowned when it rains. Or the fact that you haven't been set to Pigfarts yet in a one-way rocket.

Why are you such a jerk to me, huh? Are you jealous? Because I am so Supermegafoxyawesomehot! Is that the real reason behind it all? And what about Ron, are you jealous of his Red Vines? How about Hermione? Is it because she actually studies? If that's what it is, you need to get a grip on reality my so totally not friend.

Well, I think I have wasted enough time here so…I'm gonna go talk to Cho Chang and play my guitar.

Sincerely (well not really),

Harry

Author's Note: Alright so, it's a bit toward A Very Potter Musical in the style of things. But it's still Supermegafoxyawesomehot, right?