Ikari Tape #01

Had my first session with Shinji Ikari today. While still adhering to the typical Japanese reservedness I have noticed from the majority of the people here, at least he is more talkative than Rei, if only by a little.

He's very polite, but very shy. I don't think he still fully understands why he's here, why him of all people. He seems like he's in a bit of a daze. He apologized maybe twenty times whenever I brought up the fight with the angel, for reasons I assume only he knows. He seems to have no desire to be a pilot, yet he'll continue to do it because his father needs him.

I haven't broached him on the topic of his father yet...I imagine that's a conversation best left for when we've gotten to know each other a little bit.

(pause)

He's not staying with his father, surprisingly. Then again, I don't even know if the Commander HAS his own quarters, or if they're suitable for other living beings. So he'll stay with Captain Katsuragi for the time being.

I would wonder if that's a wise decision, given the Captain's...well, personality, I suppose. But I will admit, compared to the other members here, she IS probably the best candidate for the job.

I do hope that apartment is appropriate living conditions, however...

(pause)

As for an early diagnosis, I would hazard a guess that he suffers from a bit of APD. Avoidant Personality Disorder. He doesn't seem to understand how to react around people; even with me, he seems weary, like he's testing me out, trying to find maybe a humane point or something relatable. It could be he's just wondering if I'm going to judge him or abandon him the way his parents have. I assume he's been doing this to everyone he's met so far.

Another reason why Captain Katsuragi may not be a wise guardian...I'm not sure if she'll recognize that. She may try to push him into a direction he's not comfortable going in. And right now, I don't think pushing him is what should be done. He's in an unfamiliar place, with unfamiliar people, in a scenario one couldn't even begin to fathom. Pushing him in one direction or the other may be too much for him.

I will continue to take the approach I have started, which is to try to ease him in gently. I understand that combat is a different scenario, and you don't always have the opportunity to assess your situation properly and really THINK about it. But as long as he knows there is a couch in my office that he can come sit down in for even a hour and just feel like nothing is expected of him, that may make all of the difference.

That's the theory anyway, Katie. Whether or not it will work, well...time will tell.

End recording.