A/N: This here deserves a (trigger) warning - it's a little more angsty and has mention of violence. Not too bad but enough to mention.
The tension was immediate and for Beca it ran through the hand she was still holding, Cynthia Rose's hand. She was gripping it tighter when she felt the African-American woman stirr, ready to jump up and into Jesse's face.
"Hey guys," he said in that way he had - the one that didn't tell him this wasn't a good time to approach Beca.
Chloe beside her sat up, so did Beca herself.
"What do YOU want?" Cynthia Rose asked but Jesse only looked at her for a short moment before he trained his eyes back on Beca.
"I sent you a couple of texts," he said.
"Yeah, I got them," Beca answered and felt Chloe look at her. "I just don't wanna talk to you, Jesse."
"And that's your cue to leave," Cynthia groused.
"Yeah, you should leave," Jessica seconded this opinion and her friends all loked at her. There was anger in the girl's voice something none of them had yet heard.
"This is none of your business, you know," Jesse said. "That's between my girlfriend and I."
"Beca's not your girlfriend," Chloe said. Jesse looked at her for a long moment but didn't answer.
"Beca, please, just a few minutes," he tried again and this time Cynthia Rose slipped her hand from Beca's and got up.
"She doesn't wanna talk to you, Jesse, so get out!" The Treble was taller than the Bella but Cynthia Rose was quite an imposing figure, especially when she was angry. Jesse took a step back from her. Beca stood up as well and lay a calming hand on her friend's arm.
"It's okay, CR. Jesse, I think you better go." From the corners of her eyes she could see Chloe and Jess get up as well. And she could also see a couple of Trebles across the lawn, looking at their group.
"I just wanna talk to you, that's all," he wouldn't give up.
"Tough luck, Jesse, because it doesn't matter what you want. Beca's moved on," Chloe said.
"To you? Tell me, have you finally gotten into her pants?" He asked and turned toward her but was at the same time pushed backwards and clearly off his feet. The Trebles Beca had seen came running over as Cynthia Rose shouted at him:
"Shut up, dickhead!" It had been her who had pushed him and it looked like she was ready to launch at him but Beca and Jessica held her arms.
"Stop it, please," Beca said and her friend looked at her. The Trebles helped Jesse up and took positions beside him.
"What is wrong with you?" He yelled at Cynthia Rose.
"Wrong with her? Are you out of your mind?" Chloe yelled back.
"Calm down! All of you! Goddammit!" Beca drowned out everyone as they started to scream at each other. "Jesse, I don't wanna talk to you. You hurt me, okay? You said your piece, I wrote you that text, there is nothing more to say!"
"But I love you," he pleaded and they all looked at him.
"You have a strange way of showing that," Cynthia Rose said. She let herself be pulled away a few feet by Jessica.
"I know, I... it was a mistake," Jesse tried again. Chloe looked at Beca who was looking at Jesse. "I was such an idiot and I know that. But you have to give me another chance." There was a moment when Chloe thought that Beca would do just that and her innards crammed. It didn't feel like earlier the same year when they were in New York and Beca had kissed Jesse for the first time - it was way worse. She felt her eyes water, her stomach churn, her knees about to give out but then she saw Beca shake her head no.
"No, dude. I don't have to do that and I don't want to do it either," Beca said very clearly. Chloe turned away from everyone and held her hand to her heart for a short moment. Then she brushed at her unshed tears for a second time that day and turned back to her friends.
Jesse was staring at Beca but Beca turned first toward Cynthia Rose than toward Chloe who gave her a weak smile. Beca nodded at her. It meant something but not even Beca was sure what - and she didn't want to think about it just yet. Jesse saw it, too, and it gave him a kick in the gut. He had lost her and he knew it. There was no way back. Jesse turned and walked away, his friends trailing after him.
Cynthia Rose saw his defeated look and watched him go. She shook her head, she was still so angry. And so she turned as well and walked away.
"Cynthia Rose?" Jessica tried but her friend really didn't want to talk about all this. It was too painful. Why were people such idiots?
Beca and Chloe also turned when they heard Jessica.
"I'm going to talk to her," Chloe said but Beca touched her arm.
"Let me, please." They looked at each other and then Beca followed her friend. She was going to the auditorium, their practice hall.
Cynthia Rose sat at the piano and played a few notes when Beca entered. She didn't look up or gave any sign that she even knew her friend was there. Beca hesitated, for a moment she just looked at the other Bella. Cynthia Rose was clearly a beautiful woman, maybe not by conventional society standards - because she obviiously defied those - but by any other standards Beca could think of. And she was such a good person. That's why the Bellas captain couldn't quite understand why her friend had pushed Jesse. Had she herself been angry at his comment? Yes, but her confusion about his jealousy was greater. She had known about it since she had visited Chloe in Massachusetts and had at first thought it was just about Chloe's parents having money and all that, or about Beca spending a lot of time with her friend. But there was more, just like there had always been something more between Chloe and her - something she only now became aware of herself.
"Your ex is such a douchebag," Cynthia Rose said into Beca's thoughts. The brunette looked up and found her friend looking at her.
"Jesse's okay, he's..."
"No, he's not okay. Stop defending him. He's an ass," Cynthia interrupted Beca, her anger once again evident in her voice. Beca went over to where she sat at the piano and pulled a chair close to her seat. She leaned forward onto her thighs.
"Why're you so angry with him, CR?" The African-American woman huffed as if she could care less about just another guy who treated his girlfriend badly. But Beca didn't buy that for a second. "Talk to me," she pleaded.
Cynthia Rose hit a few more notes on the piano then turned toward her captain.
"What he said to Chloe... just... he... you can't say shit like that! Not in public, not out loud like that. People hear. And he doesn't even know what... people might do, Beca!" Her jaw set so tightly, Beca thought she might break it. Beca put a hand to Cynthia's cheek. "And he also doesn't know if it's true... not that it matters, you know."
But Beca shook her head, she wasn't sure what her friend meant or maybe she wasn't ready to know.
"I had this friend in high school. She... she had a girlfriend at another school and it was a couple of weeks before graduation when one of her class mates saw them together, just holding hands, kissing. He wasn't a bad guy really and he thought it more funny than anything. So, he told his friends, they told their friends and so on. And then there were those guys, they thought they should talk to her, five big guys, no brains but self-righteous 'tudes... they confronted her, told her to stay away from their girlfriends and shit... she got angry, they got angry and... they beat her up bad."
Beca gasped for breath, reaching for Cynthia Rose's hand.
"Oh God," she breathed.
"They didn't rape her, luckily. Just beat her," the dark-skinned woman huffed an ironic laugh. "Just." she repeated. "Well... it was bad, it could have been worse, but it was bad. She spent some time in the hospital and when she came back she had lost all her friends. And why? Because some guy who wasn't a bad guy couldn't keep his mouth shut, couldn't see the consequences of his amusement. He apologized... later but... and he wasn't dumb or anything. Just like Jesse isn't dumb. He just couldn't keep his mouth shut."
Beca nodded slowly, she understood now. Things like that could get out of hand and there had been some people watching them, not just the Trebles,and if they had heard what Jesse said to Chloe... and then there were the things Gracie Lou was constantly saying about her and Chloe...
"Heavens... is this how it is for you? I mean, do you feel... threatened like that all the time?" Cynthia Rose smiled slightly.
"No, not all the time. Certainly not when I'm with you all. But I'm very aware that things can get out of hand. Mostly they don't but there is a small chance that there's someone around who hates you because you are different. Of course, being different is not just being gay, it's being black, it's being a woman, it's wearing ear-monstrosities, or being a ginger. You can't really say what people might trigger to hate you. Not all haters will beat you up, either. You can't change who you are, you can't change on the slight chance that somebody might take offence. But you can't let people shoot their mouth's off on something like this," she explained. Beca closed her eyes for a minute. She felt Cynthia lean in close, squeezing her hand like she had done earlier and putting her other hand to her cheek. Strange how roles reversed sometimes and in a matter of minutes.
"Awareness of these things doesn't keep me from being happy with someone, Becs," she said. "People can be mean, yes, but most of the time you're among friends or among people who don't care who you love. It's not all bad but it's more difficult than being - what society calls - normal."
Beca nodded. It wasn't like she didn't know that, everybody probably knew that. But it was different when the perspective shifted, like Beca felt hers shift these days.
"What..." Beca cleared her throat. "What did your parents do?"
"My parents?"
"After those guys beat you?" She looked into her friend's eyes, saw panic there for a moment then they became glassy with tears. "It's okay," Beca whispered.
"They pressed charges, of course. There was no discussion at all. The boys were all expelled, nobody made a fuss. It was a hate crime. You know, my dad had it rough. He came from an almost stereotypical ghetto background... and he worked so hard to have his own kids grow up in a nice neighborhood with good schools. He thought that was the best way to protect us. And then I was beaten up... by three white dudes, an Asian-American and another black guy. He was beyond himself... he never blamed me, or anything, though my parents have their issues with me being gay. But that was hard on him," Cynthia recalled and tears dropped down from her chin onto their combined hands.
"Was that why your ex didn't want to go to prom?" Cynthia Rose nodded.
"She was scared out of her wits, can't really blame her. I looked bad, man. Had a few broken ribs, they had to set my nose and my jaw... black eyes, of course, and bruises all over. Luckily, no internal bleeding or anything. I was really, really lucky that way," she made a face. It sounded off but probably some doctor had told her that she had been lucky in those same words.
"Shit like that shouldn't happen. You shouldn't feel lucky because they didn't beat you to death or raped you. It could have been worse, sounds like an excuse society uses because we can't prevent shit like this from happening," Beca said darkly.
"You're right. Still, I'm kinda happy that I'm alive," she grinned.
"So am I," the DJ confirmed and smiled shyly.
Cynthia Rose got up off the piano stool and pulled Beca up as well. She hugged her captain and Beca answered in kind, pulling Cynthia Rose tightly to her.
"Thanks for defending me earlier... and Chloe," she said as they parted.
"No prob," Cynthia Rose answered and they made their way toward the exit. "So, are you gonna ask Chloe out?" She asked and Beca stopped abruptly.
"What?" Cynthia just smiled at her.
"The way I see it, you won't find anyone better than Chloe. Might as well go out with her," she advised.
"I... I don't know," Beca stammered.
"You better find out soon, 'cause she's not gonna be here for much longer," and with these words she resumed her way out of the auditorium leaving a speechless Beca behind.
