Dean and Sam searched the premises high and low for Becky, but there was no sign of her. They showed her picture around, but no one seemed to recognize her. There was no sign of a kid napping, no clues to supernatural activity. An hour went by. Since everyone was in costume, how were they supposed to identify the "hideous monsters?" The men were getting increasingly frustrated. Suddenly they heard two females gasp behind them. The men stopped in their tracks. "Oh my God, I'd recognize that ass anywhere…" a familiar voice said. Dean and Sam turned around slowly, looking pissed.
There were few things in the world that could cheer Becky up after seeing her boyfriend cheat on her, and this definitely made the list. Teri and Becky gawked at the boys with their mouths hanging open, making sounds, like two drooling morons. After a few seconds, Teri regained the ability to speak. She closed her eyes and smiled, "Genie, for my second wish…"
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Dean barked.
Teri wasn't intimidated by his homicidal rage. "Can those uniforms get any tighter?" she remarked.
"Are you wearing underwear?" Becky ogled Sam excitedly. Sam looked offended, and used his hands to shield his chest and his groin from her view. Dean continued to scowl. Teri hated it when he did that.
"Dean, you frown way too much. It's going to cause premature aging. I really hope you're using plenty of moisturizer, because you get a deep wrinkle right there…" She put her finder above his right eyebrow by his nose. He pushed her hand away.
"What are you doing here?" he demanded.
"Having the best day of my life," Teri was being smarmy, looking him up and down. "Why are you here?"
"First of all, my eyes are up here," Dean hissed. Teri now felt guilty for being a pig. Dean continued, "We get a call from Becky begging us to come down here because she's surrounded by under-cover monsters at a freaking sci-fi convention. We race down here, buy these freaking costumes, and wander around all freaking afternoon looking for you Becky, just to find you parading around dressed as Cat Woman…"
"I'm not Cat Woman…" Becky interjected softly.
"I don't care!" Dean yelled. "….and when we do find you, you're hanging out with Teri and violating us with your eyes! So yes, I'm pissed, and apparently aged prematurely!"
"You…you came all this way to rescue me?" Becky asked hesitantly.
"We figured the demons got you, or the leviathan…lately you've been pissing off as many monsters as we do," Sam said.
"I didn't call you, I swear to God!" Becky was upset. "There are no monsters here…and I've barely even been alone since I got here…"
"Then who the hell called us?" Dean snapped.
"Maybe that bastard Steve called you and impersonated Becky's voice. He did 'borrow' her phone…" Teri told them.
"Steve? Why would Becky's boyfriend call us?" Sam asked. Becky started crying again. Teri held her; Becky sobbed into Teri's shoulder.
"What?" Sam asked.
"We just caught him cheating on her outside…" Becky whispered to Sam and Dean. The brothers winced sympathetically. "Ohhhhhhh…"
"…and, he was her first, ever," Teri whispered. The brothers winced again, this time more dramatically. "Ooooooo…"
"But why would Steve call us?" Dean asked. Teri was irritated because Becky was crying again.
"Why do you men do anything that you do? Maybe he wanted to add some salt to the wound, so he tricked you into coming so you can reject Becky some more. Or maybe, you're all members of the hot guys' club, and you need to gather once a year to laugh at us!" Teri huffed.
"Hey, we don't agree with what Steve did!" Sam was defensive. He touched Becky's shoulder tenderly. "Becky, what he did to you was terrible…" Becky turned to look at Sam.
She said, "It's Ok, I knew this was going to happen. I'm not pretty enough…"
"Don't rag on yourself Becky," Sam told her, with his hands on her shoulders. "If it's any consolation, I think you look great in your costume. Not too many people can pull off latex…" Becky smiled. Sam continued. "…you're Trinity from the Matrix, right?"
"I'm Selene from Underworld."
"Oh, right, the wig… sorry!"
"No, it's Ok…thank you."
"What are you supposed to be?" Dean asked Teri. "A Viking? An opera singer?"
Teri sneered at him and walked away quickly. Becky followed. Sam smacked Dean on the back of the head. "What, you guessed Becky's costume wrong," Dean said. He didn't get it.
"Why don't you ask her if she's pregnant while you're at it?" Sam understood why Teri was upset. "Oh crap," Dean said to himself as they followed the women.
"Teri, I'm so sorry! You make a great Valkyrie," Dean called after her.
"I'm Xena you Putts!" Teri turned and snapped at him. "You totally suck at this!"
"Teri, I think you look good, I'm really sorry," Dean sounded sincere. "I've been thinking about you…"
Teri stared at him, not believing what she was hearing. "You have?"
"Yeah…is there anything I can do to make up for hurting your feelings? Maybe buy you a drink?"
"Well, before you started chewing on your foot…I was going to ask if you'd like to see a movie playing at the bargain movies down the street, maybe get away from these crowds for a little while. The movie is 'Love and Other Drugs'...it kinda old but it's really good. It's got naked Anne Hathaway for you, some naked Jake Gyllenhaal for me…it's a win-win!"
"Oooooo…Anne Hathaway, from the Princess Dairies?" Dean asked excitedly.
Sam shook his head. "You watch the weirdest movies," he observed, not forgetting Black Swan.
"There was nothing else on, and she's hot. Sue me!" Dean defended himself.
"Actually, I want to see 'Love and Other Drugs' too," Sam said. "I heard it's loosely based on a true story."
"You want to see a movie…with us?" Becky stammered.
"Just some friends seeing a movie, it's no big," Sam shrugged.
Becky couldn't believe she was going to try to talk them out of it, but she couldn't resist asking. "But aren't you guys here to work a case? This would be a perfect place for monsters to hide, right in plain sight! And there have been disappearances reported here over the years…"
"Yeah, we investigated all that, but we've been wandering around here for hours and there's nothing going on," Sam explained. "There are several thousand people here, and those disappearances were pretty sporadic…there doesn't seem to be a connection. It doesn't seem like it's our thing."
Becky and Teri couldn't believe it. Their dream men were agreeing to go to a movie with them. "Um, Ok, so when do you guys want to go?" Becky asked.
"We could go now, but we should probably go change first…"
"No, no, no, that's not necessary," Becky told the brothers. The women were worried that if the brothers had time to think, they'd change their minds. And it would be a travesty for them to change out of those glorious costumes! "People wander all over town in costume during convention season. If we all go like this, we'll fit right in," Teri assured them.
The brothers rolled their eyes and smiled. "Fine, we'll stay in our costumes," Dean sighed. "Where are you parked?"
"I'm in lot D," Teri answered.
"We're all the way in lot M, so I guess you're driving," Dean said.
"Ok, now who needs a potty break?" Teri asked. Becky said yes, the men said no.
"We're going to the restroom. You two stay here and stay out of trouble for five minutes," Teri instructed the brothers.
"You can't tell us what to do," Dean called after her.
"Stay out of trouble!" Becky turned and warned them.
"We're grown men!" Sam sounded irritated that he wasn't being trusted.
"Hey Sam, do I get a wrinkle right here…" Dean asked Sam pointing above his right eyebrow.
"Yes," Sam told him.
"I think you boys just need some R&R…" a euphonious female voice flowed behind them. Sam and Dean turned around…and were face to face with a few of the most gorgeous women either of them had ever seen. Dean and Sam gawked at them with mouths their hanging open, making sounds, like two drooling morons. The woman that spoke was a busty Asian beauty that looked like she climbed out of Dean's favorite porn magazine. Her face was mere inches away from his own. Dean felt his entire body stiffen when he looked into her eyes. A sparkly red dress was barely covering her voluptuous frame. "Who- who are you supposed to be?" he stammered, barely able to speak.
"Why Jessica Rabbit, of course," the sexy mellifluous voice said. Dean swallowed.
"I thought this was a sci-fi convention," he said hoarsely.
"It's also a fantasy convention," the woman said. "Isn't Jessica Rabbit your fantasy?" Dean nodded. He glanced over at Sam, who was being likewise seduced by a statuesque blond dressed as She-Ra. If Dean would have made the connection that She-Ra was Sam's first cartoon crush and fantasy object, he would have busted up laughing. As it was though, Dean was a little too distracted to make that association. That was because he wasn't only receiving attention from the Asian Jessica Rabbit; he was currently being molested by a Beyoncé look-alike, Milla Jovovich's character from Resident Evil, and the young Brigitte Bardot. Sam was being similarly fondled by Salma Hayek's clone, Laura Croft and Seven of Nine (Dean wasn't the only Winchester who wanted Jeri Ryan's autograph.) Becky and Teri emerged from the bathroom to see Dean in a lip lock with Jessica Rabbit and Sam making out with She-Ra. Teri and Becky were devastated.
Finally the Asian beauty stopped devouring Dean's face. "My name is Ambrosia, and you're coming with us." The crowd of luscious ladies led the two horny fools out of the room. Fighting back tears, Teri and Becky made their way to the bar so that could commence with the man hating.
