Chapter 8:
Girls in tight dresses
who drags with moustaches;
Chicks driving fast
Ingenues with long lashes;
Women who long love, lust;
Women who give;
"I need to leave" Lexa says to herself more than to Clarke looking away from Clarke's eyes.
"Lexa!" Clarke tries to grab her wife's hand but she fails to "Please! We need to talk"
Lexa shakes her head "No, we don't. I need some time alone!" She says before adding "Away from you".
"Lexa please!" Clarke begs her but Lexa feels like she is suffocating in her presence.
"No, I'll go on the weekend trip with my friends…and then when I am back" Lexa stops thinking about what to say next then says "We'll go to Fox Danworthy"
Tears well into Clarke's eyes feeling helpless she follows Lexa and begs her to stay but it seems that the brunette was deaf to her pleading.
Lexa put her pyjamas in a small bag and few clothes and headed towards the door when Clarke runs past her and stands her back to the door keeping Lexa from leaving.
Clarke looks at her but Lexa doesn't meet her eyes, she is too angry to talk or even look at her.
"Lexa, please" Lexa hears Clarke's voice begging her not to leave "Lexa! Look at me" Clarke tries to reach for Lexa's face but the brunette avoids her touch and Clarke lets out a sob.
"Get out of my way, Clarke" Lexa lets out harshly.
"No, I'm not letting you leave" Clarke replies.
"Clarke! This is stupid, get out of my fucking way" Lexa lets out harshly.
"Why!" Clarke exclaims.
"I'm not doing this with you, Clarke" Lexa adds before pushing Clarke out of her way and leaving.
When she was in her car she hears Clarke screaming her lungs out, she takes a deep breath and drives away before Clarke follows her and makes a scene.
Lexa calls Raven and tells her that she is on her way to her place, saying that she needs a place to spend the night and Raven welcomes her.
They don't talk about what happened in Lexa's place, Raven offers her friend a shoulder to cry and a drink before heading to bed.
The very next morning, Lexa wakes up with a smell of pancakes and when she gets to the kitchen Alice bids her good morning and pushes a plate with delicious freshly made pancakes and a coffee mug.
"I didn't know you can cook!" Lexa says casually.
"Well, there's a lot things I can do" Alice smirks.
"Raven is lucky then" Lexa compliments.
"For now" Alice adds with a wink.
"Yeah!" Lexa nods.
"Morning Ladies" Raven steps in the kitchen and kisses Alice's neck.
"Morning sexy" Alice replies with a smile while Lexa simply says "Morning, Raven".
"You're spoiling us today or is it a one time thing because of Lexa?" Raven says.
"Definitely because of Lexa" Alice replies.
"Humm, Lexa I should invite you for sleepovers more often" Raven chuckles.
Lexa forces a smile as a reply not knowing what to reply. She wasn't here for a sleepover but she was here because she wanted to be away from Clarke, her wife to not fight with her. She was here because she has nowhere else to go.
"Today is going to be a busy day, I have an interview to do with some local artist then I'll be free to get ready for our trip" Alice says happily.
"I have to finish some things at the lab and it might take me the whole day so I don't think I'll be of much help, sorry!" Raven explains.
"That's ok, Alice you have me" Lexa smiles weakly.
"Great, you're coming to work with me then I'll introduce you to my boss before we go to interview the artist. How does it sound?" Alice asks.
"Good, I guess" Lexa replies.
"What?" Alice grimaces.
"Fantastic" Lexa corrects and Alice nods in approval while Raven laughs.
Clarke walks in her office in a mess the next morning. She spent a restless night thinking about her marriage and Lexa and how things got so bad between the two of them without her noticing.
Monty follows her silently seeing that Clarke was not so well as usual, she is perfectly dressed but her hair is not done as to her habits, no makeup and no jewelry. It was the sign that she had a terrible night or maybe she was hangover.
He briefs her in an almost whispering tone and Clarke is grateful for it. He doesn't go over all the details to cut it short and pushes her schedule for the day and turns to leave when finally Clarke speaks "No more Lunch meetings Monty"
"Alright, Clarke. I figured that and kept your lunch break free" Monty explains pointing at her schedule on her desk.
"Thank you" Clarke replies seriously and waits for him to close the door before checking her schedule.
"No Niylah! Good" She thinks loudly to herself.
Lexa spends the morning with Alice, she receives few calls and two texts from Clarke which she doesn't reply to, still feeling angry about Clarke's behavior.
Instead of going to work directly, Raven decides to stop by the café. She orders and waves at Octavia who was talking to a man. Octavia nods and few seconds later comes to see her.
"Hi" Raven says nervously.
"Hi, Raven" Octavia replies with a smile.
"Do you need something?" Octavia asks looking at Raven who is silent.
"No, I ordered" Raven replies then adds "I don't want you to go to Palm Springs"
"What?" Octavia looks surprised at her.
"I said, I don't want you to go to Palm Springs" Raven repeats as if it is normal what she was saying.
"I heard you, Rey!" Octavia deadpans angrily "What a shame because I'm going" Octavia says before turning away but Raven stops her and grabs her wrist.
Octavia looks back at her with a death glare "Let go of me, Raven"
Raven loosens her grip then lets Octavia's wrist "Fine" She spits angrily.
"How dare you! You're going there with…" Octavia gestures then holds her tongue "I thought we were going somewhere, we talked…I'm stupid" Octavia stutters then leaves.
Raven closes her eyes 'Fuck' She mumbles, she just fucked it up again but she couldn't help herself trying. The idea of Octavia with Dana in the same hotel room didn't sit well with her, she spent the night thinking about it and about what she can do to not let it happen but nothing really came to her mind so she decides she will simply ask Octavia.
She takes her order and leaves the café to her lab, it is going to be a long day and it is going to be a shitty and long weekend.
Later that day Lexa decides to go to her place and get ready for the weekend before Clarke comes back home avoiding her sparing them another fight. When she finishes packing she goes back to Raven's lab to ask for her keys and finds Raven in a shitty mood.
"Hey!" Lexa walks into Raven's lab.
"Hey you!" Raven replies not tearing her eyes from what she was doing.
"I went and packed to avoid bumping into Clarke later" Lexa says to her friend.
"Yeah, good move" Raven comments.
"Not really! I shouldn't be avoiding her" Lexa huffs.
"No, it is a good and the smart thing to do" Raven insists.
"If you say so" Lexa shrugs "So, I need the keys to your apartment so I can leave what I packed"
"Of course" Raven replies going to one of her drawers to grab the keys.
"Here" She toss them to her friend then goes back to her work.
"Are you sure you're ok?" Lexa asks worried.
"I'm fine, Lexa" Raven replies.
"Raven! Don't tell me Clarke's words affected you!" Lexa asks feeling like Raven is acting cold and avoiding to meet her eyes.
"What?" Raven huffs out finally looking at her "Hell no!" She reassures her friend "Yeah, it was…weird! I mean What? But" She shrugs "I don't care if she has trust issues with you…it is not about her" Raven adds.
"Then what is it?" Lexa tries not to discuss about Clarke's behavior and focus on what's bothering her friend.
"Octavia" Raven says looking back at her work.
"What about her?" Lexa insists.
"Nothing really!" Raven replies "I just…things were fine and I fucked it up again"
"What did you do?" Lexa asks bluntly.
"I told her not to go to Palm Springs" Raven replies.
Lexa holds herself from laughing "You did what?"
"You heard right" Raven says shamefully.
"God! Why? You're going there too" Lexa asks confused.
"I know, but she is going with Dana" Raven says.
"So what? You're going there with Alice" Lexa comments.
"I just don't want her and Dana to…to hook up" Raven confesses shyly.
"Ow!" Lexa doesn't know what to say she wasn't expecting to hear that.
"Yeah!" Raven huffs.
"You love her" Lexa says and Raven looks at her.
"I don't want another woman kissing her and touching her…I don't want someone else to be her first" Raven says.
"That's…sweet" Lexa comments "Clarke was my first" She smiles sadly "Yet look where we're"
"Exactly! You're married" Raven says annoyed then Lexa raises an eyebrow at her "It's different" Raven says "I'd never be a jerk to her if she was my wife"
"Thank you for reminding me that I have a jerk for a wife" Lexa jokes bitterly "If you don't want someone else to be her first what are you doing with Alice then?"
Raven's lips part then shuts "I don't know" She lets out angrily.
"Then figure it out and tell Octavia how you feel" Lexa says seriously.
"Really!" Raven looks at her "Your advice is to go tell my homophobic friend that I am gay for her?"
"Right, but if she is homophobic what is she doing with Dana then?" Lexa asks her.
"I don't know" Raven huffs "She is just….arfff…irritating! A minute she is kissing me and fucking me in a bathroom the next minute she is homophobic"
"She fucked you in the bathroom?" Lexa's eyes widen.
"No, I fucked her but…that's not the point Lexa!" Raven replies annoyed.
"Oh, girl you really are gay for her" Lexa says.
"What should I do?" Raven asks "I can't possibly tell her that I want her"
"Yet a few minutes ago you were picturing her in a white dress saying I do to you! Raven do what you gotta do to let her know! You know her better than I do" Lexa says leaving Raven thoughtful.
Clarke parks her car outside her house and looks at it. Nothing, the place is dark no lights on she lets out a deep breath and takes her handbag along with her suitcase which had some paper work she needed to finish and gets out of her car.
She is walking to her door keys already in her hands when she sees Tim parking his car she smiles at him and he waves at her getting out of his car.
"Clarke" He calls her.
"Hey! Tim" She replies.
"Hey! How are you?" Tim asks her with genuine concern and Clarke forces a smile "I'm fine, you?"
"I'm good" He smiles back at her.
"Why don't you come to Palm Springs?" Tim blurs out.
"Wasn't invited" Clarke bluntly replies.
"Then come with me" Tim grins.
"I can't, work" Clarke simply replies feeling exhausted she lifts her suitcase gesturing with it.
"You shouldn't let it affect your relationship, Clarke" Tim says seriously.
"It's not" Clarke replies and Tim looks at her knowingly.
"I mean! It's not just work…it is like we're drifting apart…and the baby loss…it is like too many things at the same time" Clarke tries to explain.
"Then you should take a break! Go to Palm Spring, surprise Lexa, be there, spend time with her…I don't know" Tim shrugs "Do your thing to get that flame back! You guys are my favorite couple"
Clarke smiles weakly at him, she long ago forgot how to do her thing she feels like everything she does is wrong and not enough. And they haven't been that couple for a while now. She shakes her head "I don't think she wants to see me again after yesterday's…she left! I tried to stop her from leaving but to no avail…she was determined to get away…from me, she said" Clarke says hurt in her tone "She said she needs time away from me" Clarke's voice is broken.
Tim nods "It happens! Give her time" He shrugs then looks at her intently 'But not long" He warns her.
"Don't worry, I'm not that stupid" Clarke says "We're going to see a couple's therapist when she comes back" She adds.
"I'm sure you'll get through it, Lexa loves you" Tim smiles sympathetically at her.
"Thank you Tim" Clarke replies.
When she gets finally into her house then into her bedroom she notices that Lexa came by and packed 'She doesn't even want to see me'. She kicks off her heels and lays on her bed defeated.
On the way to Palm Srings;
Alice hops in the car along with Raven and Lexa, she checks everything before finally starting off the engine.
"Ready for a weekend full of Lezies, Lexa?" Alice asks.
"Ready for the weekend" Lexa replies with a smile feeling a little bit better than the previous day.
"I'm warning you Raven if I find someone sexier than you, you don't know me! Ok?" Alice says shamelessly.
"Ow! I thought we're gonna share a room" Raven replies confused.
"Hell no!" Alice deadpans and they burst in laughter.
"So you're going to hook up with different people in a…?" Lexa asks.
"A golf tournament" Raven continues.
"Yeah! A golf tournament also known as a Dinah shore weekend" Alice explains.
"Is she gay?" Lexa asks.
"No, Dinah Shore is dead, she died back in 1994 and she actually hated the fact that the tournament turned into a spring break for lesbians" Alice informs Lexa.
"Ow! I read that there will be around ten thousand women in there!" Lexa replies.
"Yeah! Ten thousand gays, she is rolling in her grave" Alice jokes.
Once they get there, Alice stops them at the entry of the hotel "Wait here guys! Let me handle this" Raven and Lexa looks at her then at each other not understanding what Alice is planning to do.
Few minutes later, Alice comes back with one key card "I got us a presidential suite with room service everything covered by my job" She grins.
Raven looks at Lexa then at Alice "I thought we're not sharing the same room!"
"Well, we'll see about that if I can get some you guys are out" Alice simply says before getting into the elevator "Come on girls"
Lexa leans closer to Raven and whispers "Octavia! Don't forget that she may get some too"
"I don't need a reminder thank you" Raven replies and follows them into the elevator.
They walk into the presidential suite and admires the decoration then Lexa opens the balcony which gives view directly at the Hotel's swimming pool.
"That's every man's dream to dive in a woman lesbian pool" Lexa says catching Raven and Alice's attention who comes out and see for themselves what she is talking about.
"It's going to be a gayful weekend" Alice sheers and both Lexa and Raven laughs.
"It sure is going to be interesting" Lexa says and Raven doesn't miss her friend's innuendo.
Later in the afternoon, Dana along with Tim and Octavia gets to the hotel. The minute they step in, a funny and bubbly looking woman runs to meet them "Dana? Dana Fairbanks?" She hooks her arm around Dana's taking her by surprise "Eh, yeah"
"I'm so glad to meet you, I'm Tonya and I'm here to take care of all your needs. So are you alone?" The woman speaks in a breath.
"Oh!" Dana is almost surprised she stopped "No, I'm with my friends" She points out to Octavia and Tim.
The woman eyes Octavia closely "She is your girlfriend? Because if she is I'm sure I can make few calls to get her tickets! I need you ready in a half an hour but I'll handle it" She asks bluntly.
"Ow! No" Dana replies shyly looking at Octavia who shakes her head at the crazy looking woman and then smiles at Dana "I'll be fine".
"Ok! So glad to have you hear Dana, I'm gonna need to protect you from the staff here, seriously though I am here to link between you and your fans it is part of my job" She stares at Dana who is a bit disoriented "Ok" She laughs nervously.
"Now! I'm gonna give you the key to your room" She hands it to Dana who thanks her.
"And here is my card, I'm going to note my phone number and I want you to use it if you need anything at all" She adds and Dana nods "Ok!"
"I'm talking about a second opinion to what pair of shoes you need to wear, you just call me, ok?" She speaks again quickly and Dana is barely enough to catch on her words while Tim and Octavia are watching with wide eyes the energetic exchange between the two women "Ok" Dana replies again.
"Bye, ladies" Tonya finally spares a second glance at Octavia who flushes a nervous smiles at her "Bye".
Octavia walks towards the reception desk to book a room when Dana stops her.
"Wait! I invited you! And it is a suite I mean it is big enough for the two of us" She lifts the key to show it to Octavia.
"Ok" Octavia smiles and follows her.
"See you at the photo shoot, Dana" Tim shouts to Dana who was walking toward the elevator.
Just as Dana and Octavia are getting to their suite, a door opens and Raven and Alice along with Lexa storms out laughing of their own. Alice had her arm around Raven's waist.
"Oh hey guys" Dana waves at them while Lexa looks at Octavia, Raven stiffen seeing that indeed Octavia is going in the same room as Dana.
"Hi" Alice smiles at them "We're neighbors, how cool is that?" She lets out joyfully.
'Fuck' Raven greets her teeth and Lexa lets out a strangled chuckle.
"Cool" Dana replies "Guess we'll see you guys later" She adds before sliding her key.
"It's going to be interesting" Lexa lets out sarcastically and Raven rolls her eyes "Shut up"
West Hollywood, Clarke's house;
Clarke wakes up to her phone chiming, she tries to grab it from her nightstand but fails to, she groans feeling a little bit hang over after spending her night drinking her ass off.
"Fuck" She groans when her phone starts ringing again.
She pushes herself out of bed and reaches for it "Monty?" She says after picking up.
"Eh! Clarke! I'm sorry to call but are you not coming today? Should I cancel all your meetings?"
"What?" Clarke looks at her phone and her eyes widen "Oh God! No, I'll be right there" She hangs up and hurries to get into the shower. It is not usual that she is late to work, well she is never late to work. With all the alcohol she has in her system and little sleep she manages just fine to shower and get ready in a record time.
When she gets to her office, she check her schedule and huffs 'Niylah' again! Just before lunch time, apparently this woman isn't going to give up trying.
Few minutes later, Monty pushes the door softly and steps in "I'm sorry for bothering you, Clarke" He starts when Clarke cuts in "Monty, you don't have to say sorry every time you have something to tell me" Clarke smiles at him.
"I'm sorry!" He repeats "Niylah is here to see you" Monty says looking at Clarke for a reply.
'Since when she doesn't bother barging in and waits politely!' Clarke thinks to herself "I…emmm, can you tell her I'll meet her in the conference room?" She can't keep avoiding her, it is going to be suspicious.
Monty simply nods almost whispering his reply "Ok" before leaving. He has been tiptoeing around Clarke since the day she caught him pinned against the wall by Jasper.
She dives back into her work finishing the paper work she brought home with her but didn't touch and then goes to the conference room where she unmistakingly finds Niylah's waiting for her.
"Clarke" Niylah lets out in a surprised tone.
"Niylah" Clarke nods curtly taking siiting face to face to the woman "You have half an hour, I've tones of work to do" Clarke lets out.
"Oh! I asked Monty to schedule our meeting on lunch time but he said you asked him not to" Niylah excuses herself.
"Yes" Clarke confirms.
"It's fine, I just wanted to go over some last details with you and we can go out to…" Clarke interjects "Please I don't have all day"
"Ok!" Niylah raises her eyebrow she is about to start then lets out "Are you purposely avoiding me?" Clarke frowns feigning confused.
"Cause it really seems that you're" Niylah explains "I can send my assistant to go over the details with you but don't complain if thinfs are not how you want them at the end result" Niylah sounds offended and Clarke feels embarrassed at her behavior. It is stupid she needs to be an adult and be true to herself and to the woman.
"I'm sorry! It is just that I'm stressed out with the exhibition" She pinches the bridge of her nose "I didn't want to be rude let's get to work and I'll make it up to you with Lunch, I know a good restaurant down town! How does it sound?"
Niylah's eyes bulge, she smiles and it reaches her eyes too "Perfect, it sounds perfect" She nods and starts right away.
After few minutes Clarke and Niylah are done and heads to the parking lot of the CAC.
"Hey! We're taking my car this time and I'm inviting" Clarke looks at Niylah with a smile.
"Ok, ok" Niylah raises both her hands in surrender.
"Good, get in" Clarke replies.
Clarke takes Niylah in her favorite restaurant and walks in then Niylah gestures "Is it ok if we take a table right there" She points at the terrace.
"Of course" Clarke smiles and follows her "I like an open space and restaurants with terraces, they are the best" Niylah comments.
"Yeah I like them too" Clarke replies with a shy smile.
The lunch goes well until Clarke's phone chimes.
"Oh! Your phone is a mood killer" Niylah comments.
"I'm sorry I gotta take it" Clarke excuses herself and walks to take it "Hi O"
"Aw, Hi Clarke" Clarke hears her friends in the other end. She picked up hoping to ask her friend about Lexa knowing that Octavia was in Palm Springs too and as Lexa refused to reply to any of her text messages or pick up her calls.
"Is everything alright?" Clarke asks worried.
"Yeah!" Octavia replies.
"Is Lexa alright?" Clarke tries again wanting to be specific.
"Yes, she is actually she is having way too much fun!" Octavia comments and Clarke's heart tugs.
"What? What do you mean, she's having too much fun?" Clarke asks worried.
"No, no not what it sounds like! She is drunk as fuck and she is….she is being I don't know! She keeps talking about you! It's early and she shouldn't be that drunk! Just call her, Clarke" Octavia says with a worried tone "I thought you should know"
"Thank you O! I'm gonna call her" Clarke replies before hanging up.
Clarke walks back to their table and apologizes.
"Is everything ok? I heard that some of the artwork is being hold up at the customs" Niylah looks at Clarke seeing that she looked worried by the phone call she got.
"No, it is nothing like that" Clarke replies "It was my friend who called" She says before adding "She's worried about my wife"
Niylah freezes "Oh!" She looks at Clarke who looks right into her eyes "I didn't know you had one!" She takes her drink and sips from the straw looking at Clarke waiting for a reply.
"Why would you?" Clarke replies with a smile.
Palm Springs, by the pool:
Octavia walks back outside by the pool where Alice, Raven and Lexa are having drinks.
"Lexa! You should stop drinking" Octavia says feeling like she needs to be the responsible one as usual if she can't stop her from getting wasted she should stick around to make sure she will be ok.
"What? No way! At least now I can drink! No baby, No fucking Clarke around to tell me what to do…and not do" She raises her drink to Octavia "You should get a drink and loosen up a little bit O"
"Right, do that" Alice replies giggling drunkily.
"God! You guys are drunk as fuck!" Octavia huffs annoyed.
"What are you doing with us Funsucker? Where is your Dana anyway?" Alice says earning Raven's attention who looks at Octavia waiting for her to answer.
"She has a photo shoot" Octavia replies.
"Ok! And that one right there?" Lexa points out at a woman walking at the other side of the pool.
"Easy! That's what I call a hundred footer" Alice replies and Octavia frowns and asks "What's that?"
"It means she can tell she is a lesbian from a hundred feet away, O" Raven replies looking annoyed at her.
"Is it her hair, is it her tits! I don't know, I can tell she is a lesbian from across a football field" Alice explains.
"That's stupid" Octavia lets out "You can't guess someone's sexuality by the looks"
"Yes, we can tell. It's like Gaydar, right?!" Lexa says.
Raven raises her eyebrow when Octavia stands up and walks few feet away "Ok! Guys what am I?" Octavia asks trying to get into the game.
Lexa laughs spilling out her drink laughing.
"Nah! Octavia, you're in transition it's impossible" Alice replies and Octavia insists "Come on, All"
"You need like a guy or a girl to tip you one way or the other" Alice replies shaking her head.
"Fuck! Who is the Funsucker now!" Octavia looks at Raven.
Back to Hollywood, the restaurant's terrace;
"Ok, I guess we should go back to work" Niylah says.
"Yeah!" Clarke smiles at her nervously.
Clarke stands up and walks few steps then turns back to get her phone from the table where she forgot it when she bumps directly into Niylah who was walking right behind her.
Their faces are barely an inch away from one another, Clarke would swear Niylah intentionally leaned in closer, she could feel her breath hitch. Clarke's eyes drops to Niylah's lips then back to her eyes.
