So, I apologize for the awful last chapter. It will probably get rewritten later, but for now... It'll have to do. I personally believe that this is an improvement. Also, slight Science Bros (BECAUSE, LIFE). And for Pepperony shippers, I apologize for the complete lack of Pepper. Oh well. And there's Hulk/Banner feels. Just because.


Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. I am merely using them for my own personal enjoyment.


CHAPTER EIGHT: Totally Not a Drill. At All.


So, Tony's like, ninety-nine percent sure that this is not a drill. Like, almost one-hundred percent sure. But not quite. You know?

Anyway.

So his first clue, is the blatantly obvious: This is not a drill. Which quickly follows the whole ominous 'Doctor Doom' message. His second clue is that everyone's screaming and actively prepping for battle. His third? There's a Doom-Bot crashing through the doors right now, and everyone is flipping their shit. Except Tony. Psh, no.

"Oh my Holy Freaking God it's a freaking Doom-Bot!" Says Johnny, but he's laughing as he says it. Shit-stirrer, that one.

"What the flipping shit is a Doom-Bot?" Clint yells over the commotion, reaching for his arrows… which are lying five feet away from him. He reaches for them, but they're crushed by the 'bot which is now making its slow way toward the unarmed archer. Clint screams, then, more because of his arrows. "I'm gonna shove a stick up your fucking ass." He announces, staring almost mournfully at the destroyed wooden quiver and arrows which are now scattered across the floor.

Logan snorts.

"X-Men!" Says Charles. "Get everyone out."

"On it," Says Ororo, and then they all dash off.

The Fantastic Four exchange looks. "And us, sir?" Asks Reed.

"Just attack them all. You know the most about them, you take care of them." He looks at the Avengers grimly. "We have something else to do entirely."

Tony wants to ask what the hell he's being told to do, but shuts up at a pointed look from Steve and just follows. Screw the suit; he's Hellfire. For now, anyway.

Charles leads them into an old library, and then pulls out a quick sequence of books. Tony is amused that one of them is a Bananas in Pyjamas picture book, but gets that same look from Steve again, so keeps his trap shut. Because, you know, he's been smacked in the head with that shield before, and it's not really an experience he'd like to repeat.

"Holy cow." Says Bruce, peering at the bookshelf as it slides backward to reveal a long white passage. That's all, too, no doors and no windows. Tony doesn't know what the point of it is, but just goes with it. Charles has his reasons. Obviously.

"That's cool." Says Natasha, mildly impressed.

"No." Says Bruce. "I was going to say something about it being like, out of a cheesy spy movie." He glances at the bookshelf in distaste.

"Preach, brother." Says Clint, but he salutes at the end and kind of kills it.

"What is this spy movie of cheese?" Thor looks totally lost.

"A really bad spy movie." Tony clarifies, heading into the passage, and being swiftly followed by everyone else.

The whole time they're walking, they have to put up with Clint griping and moaning about how Tony has no sense of humour any more. The billionaire isn't quite sure what brought that one on, but mutters something about Clint having more issues than a Playboy magazine.

"Because you've been in plenty of them," Clint retorts slyly, and Tony thinks back to a hideous issue that had him… no. He won't talk about it. He just remembers Clint finding the old photo-shoot and posting it up all over the tower. The good news was, Clint's Avengers suit and arrows were bright pink for the next few weeks.

The journalists went wild about that one.

Tony is about to snap something back, when Charles clears his throat loudly and announces that they're here, so if the Avengers would shut up now please, then he'd be very grateful. All anyone can see is still just white walls, so they're completely confused, until Charles feels about the wall for a moment and then digs his fingers into a hidden groove. His eyes light up when the wall pulls out, and there's a big enough gap for everyone to slip past.

Once inside, Charles flicks a light switch which illuminates the room is a bright golden glow, and Tony frowns when he sees a bundle of notes in the centre of the room, and a large fridge up the back with vials of golden liquid held within it.

"Reed never dared to do this sort of research on a computer. Too dangerous if it ever got hacked, and…" Charles smiles. "…he never had the brilliance in engineering and electronics to make a JARVIS of his very own. On the other hand… sciences are his specialty. He created a sort of drug that could induce nightmares upon people."

Clint holds up a hand, like he's still in school or something. "Um… nightmares aren't that bad."

"That's… isn't that impossible?" Says Steve in wonder.

"It is." Says Tony, eyes darkening. "Why would he do this?"

"He was trying to create something else." Says Charles. "I'm not sure what. I just know that he created this by accident. Anyway. It's not just nightmares. It brings back old memories. It brings them to the front of your mind, like they only just happened… it makes any regular person go mad. Unfortunately, there's no certainty that his antidote works, and we're not going to test this on anyone. It's awful. But we didn't want to destroy it… in case…"

In case we need it.

Tony shudders.

"If it is Reed's invention, then why is it within your possession, Charles?" Thor frowns, like there's a concept here he can't quite grasp. But nobody else, sans perhaps Tony, has guessed why.

"Because," says Tony. "I daresay some people, like Erik and Victor Von Shit-Head, who have already found out about it. So he's given it to Charles for safekeeping. Probably safer with the guy who didn't make it than him."

"Makes sense." Says Natasha, slowly. She stares at the drug, like it's the worst thing she's ever seen. With the past she's had, Tony can't find himself willing to blame her, at all.

Suddenly, Steve stills. "I can…" He cocks his head to one side and closes his eyes, like he's straining to hear something. "I can hear something.

At first, nobody else can, but then there's a distinct whirring sound, which gradually gets closer and closer, and suddenly it's like it's in the same room. A quick glance toward the door has everyone reaching for weapons, and Hulk coming into immediate play. Tony allows his whole form to become engulfed in flames.

He rises off the ground a fraction, and shoots a quick experimental blast at the 'bot. No. Not Victor Von Doom.

Clint yelps. "Holy shit!" He screeches. "It shoots out fire too?"

"That's me, you dickhead." Tony snorts, shooting a blast at him, which just misses his head. He smirks. Clint scowls.

The 'bot creeps up, still whirring, and Tony has a moment to appreciate the uncanny likeness to the real Doctor Doom. He cocks his head to one side, then allows himself a moment to appreciate the brilliance of the invention. It's intricately built, complete with such a human form and look, masked by a shadowed green cape that only the slight whirring and Tony's trained eye can recognise it for the robot that it is. Then, suddenly, there's a stampede of noise, and suddenly ten more are standing behind it; all exact clones of one another that have Tony reeling backwards in surprise.

Well then.

Natasha frowns. "So do they, like, attack or…?"

"HULK SMASH!"

The Doom-Bots whirr to life. All stampede at once, followed by five more which were evidently hidden out in the corridor. Ten swarm Hulk, and he's becoming increasingly frustrated, all of them on top of him and crushing him… and he roars then, louder than perhaps Tony had anticipated. He has to cover his ears if he'd like to keep his ear-drums intact after this.

Clint leaps at one, which Tony immediately assists him with, after a messy kick by the archer to one of its legs.

"This is weird!" Clint yells, ducking under a poorly aimed fist.

"What?" Tony snaps, jumping back as a leg kicks out.

"I can see your ugly face during a fight." He snorts. "I think it's cramping my style."

Tony flicks him the middle finger, then grips the Doom-Bot's head, and blows it to smithereens. "Lovely."

Charles is doing his best to keep them at bay, but they don't have minds like a regular human, so he simply wheels over to the fridge and keeps guard in case any slip through. He can't do much, but he can gain a few seconds, at best.

Natasha is fiercely battling another. Guns blazing and hair flowing behind her back like a deadly fire, it's no wonder that she's known as the Black Widow for a reason. She's as deadly as her counterpart, and twice as poisonous. Cap isn't far behind. His shield saves Nat from a harsh blow to the head, because it averts the 'bot's attention toward the super soldier who's eyes are gleaming with a cold sort of fury.

Perhaps the Hulk doesn't need it, but Thor's decided to help out over there, and with his first blow, three of the 'bots are knocked backward, though not fully eliminated, as they just get up and scramble back over.

So, that leaves Tony.

He's ninety-nine percent sure that by now he's blown up about three, but they've learned by now that touching him is bad, and are already learning to do more evasive techniques around him. Fire is exploding from the tips of his fingers, and his dark hood is up and covering his equally dark eyes. He's glad they can't see his eyes; because he's pretty sure Charles says they glow gold, like deadly fire.

He's not sure he wants to know what that looks like.

Then, the worst happens.

It's completely bizarre, and everyone doubts that it's ever happened in the entire existence of the Hulk, but something goes wrong and suddenly he's shrinking… shrinking until he's a defenseless scientist beneath a cluster of vicious 'bots and Tony moves like he's never moved before because that's his science bro.

Science bro's for life and all that.

He darts forward and screams, louder than he's ever screamed before and with an even deadlier yell than he's ever heard in his life. Because there's something raw and full of emotion that escapes him then. All the anger and rage, and love of a close friend… And then there's an explosion of light. Everything is flashing, one by one and all at once, large explosions going off in every corner and crevice of the bright white room…

And then there is nothing.

Tony sinks to the floor, and then into blackness.

"Completely bizarre. Just everything in the room…"

"And the Hulk? What even…?"

"Some sort of drug in Banner's system?"

"Looks like his coffee was spiked."

"Who…."

"How even?"

"I've never seen Tony do…"

And then Tony is sinking back into darkness, the voices still ringing in his over-sensitive ears.


When he awakens next, he's pretty sure he's back where he woke up last time. He really needs to stopwaking up like this, because he's starting to feel like Sleeping Beauty or something, and it's giving him hives.

Pepper is beside him again, but this time she's sleeping, head buried in his neck and her breath puffing out in little cool gasps on his skin. Further investigation shows Bruce on the bed beside him, head wrapped in gauze and arms painted red, and then gone over in a gross yellowy colour by some sort of ointment. Clint is sleeping against the door, head lolled forward and Natasha's head across his lap. Thor is pacing, and he seems to be the only one awake. Except for Tony.

"Hey Point Break." Says the billionaire, weakly. "You got a… got a mean swing."

"Man of Iron!" Booms Thor, effectively jolting everyone awake. "It was not I who placed the condition upon you."

"It wasn't?" Tony's feeling confused. He feels like Thor's just whopped him upside the head with his hammer. "Then… what?"

"Doom-Bot's, my friend."

Then it all comes rushing back, and suddenly, Bruce sitting in the bed beside him makes a hell of a lot more sense.