The Days Before the Crowning
Azula continued her charade until she was certain the water tribe girl was out of earshot. Then she pulled herself over to her bed mat and leaned her back against the wall, allowing it to support her.
The beating Katara delivered was severe. Azula had protected her ribs as much as possible but the pain seemed even worse than before. Her prison garb was in poor shape now, as the water whip Katara had used tore through parts of her clothing. A part of Azula's stomach showed through a rather large tear, revealing a gash that went from her lower rib, down and across her abdomen to her hip on the opposite side. There were deep bruises on her arms, legs, and back from being slammed to the walls and floor.
Azula let the abuse she had endured run through her mind. As she did, a dull throbbing pain from every cut and bruise filled her senses. The pain kept her mind sharp; it kept her mind from wandering back to insanity.
I never broke, I stayed strong, Azula thought. Azula knew she was smiling all the time Katara was attacking her, but it wasn't because of her indomitable will to spite the water bender - it was because of the images she had of her mother, speaking words of love and motherly affection.
The thoughts of her mother's warm embrace allowed Azula to drift off to sleep. The night was not peaceful for her, as she had horrible nightmares of her father. After a particularly bad night terror, she woke abruptly, coughing and gasping for air.
The nightmare she had involved her being chained by her ankle to the center of the palace training area. She remembered in the dream that she had to dodge and block her father's fire attacks while only being allowed to move a couple of feet because of the chain. Remembering the dream and how painful her ankle was, Azula subconsciously slid her hand down to the ankle that was chained. Azula gasped as she felt a rough scar. All the blood in her face left as she realized that she wasn't just having nightmares - they were memories she had suppressed. Her mental break must have unlocked the suppressed memories.
Azula began to cry. She realized for the first time in her life that she was who she was because her father made her that way. He molded and shaped her to be a cold, heartless, calculating bitch. She was made into the perfect fire princess, the fire princess her father wanted her to be. The path Azula had taken was not one she chose, but was chosen for her. The thoughts of what her father forced her to become made her think back to Ember Island.
Azula thought back to that night on the beach when she, Zuko, and their friends shared with each other. She thought back to how Zuko was angry with himself even though his honor had been restored and he finally had their father's acceptance. The words she dwelled on the most were those that Zuko said when he realized he didn't know what was right or wrong anymore.
Azula laid on her bed mat and thought long and hard. The more she thought the more confused she became. Everything she knew about right and wrong seemed skewed to her now... her sense of justice somewhat out of place. She used to know who she was, but the more she thought the less she knew who she was. Her life was defined by her bending prowess and all that her father instilled in her. All that was gone now, all there was left was a powerless little girl with a fractured mind.
Azula's thoughts were interrupted when a small hatch at the bottom of her cell door opened and a tray of food slid through it. Azula crawled over to the food. It was a bowl of sticky rice and a cup of water. As Azula ate the cold rice with her fingers, she realized how far she had truly fallen. Once a proud and powerful princess, she now sat in a filthy cell eating cold rice with her dirt and blood covered hands.
Evening approached - or at least she thought it was evening - as she was finishing the rest of her rice. It was the third meal she had received that day.
At least my brother had enough leniency to move me to this place where I actually get fed, Azula thought, remembering the days she went without food before she lost her bending. The food she ate gave her some strength and she knew she needed all the strength she could get once Katara came back.
Azula was just finishing off the last of the water in her cup when her cell door opened again, yet again revealing the water tribe girl. Azula gently placed her cup down and looked up at Katara with a subtle smirk on her face. Katara, on the other hand, had a wicked scowl on her face, her eyes searing into Azula's. It seemed the last few days of Azula's suffering had done nothing to curb her anger.
Azula stood with labored effort. Her legs were weak and sore from the abuse they'd taken the past couple of days. Azula made her way to the middle of the back wall, using it to hold her up. She put her back against the wall, raised her arms above her head and assumed the place she had been forced into several times since her capture.
"Well, water bender... Shall we begin?" Azula asked, curling her lip.
Azula was taunting her, Katara thought furiously. The girl was defenseless, beaten down, and broken and she was still taunting her! Katara's blood began to boil, her face turning red. In a rush of anger, Katara shot a blast of water at Azula. The water froze, leaving her pinned to the wall. Katara stomped up to Azula and stared viciously into her eyes. While holding her death glare, Katara allowed all the frozen water to melt and flow back into her pouch. She left enough ice to keep Azula's hand pinned to the wall above her head. Azula stared back into Katara's eyes, her smirk still on her lips.
"Well? What are you waiting for? Do you worst."
Without hesitation Katara obliged the former princess, and hit her with the violent force of her water bending attacks.
The next two days followed the same routine. Azula would allow her mind to think of her life, her situation, and her past decisions. Only stopping her thoughts when she was brought food. Each time Katara came, the process was the same, only Katara became increasingly physical, actually punching, kicking, and scratching instead of just water bending attacks.
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Sokka noticed that Katara would act differently in the evening after everybody ate. He noticed that she became strangely quiet, and her face held a look that concerned him. He had noticed that since they saw Azula's bending removed, every night a couple of hours after everybody went to bed Katara would sneak off into the darkness.
"Suki, something is wrong with Katara," Sokka said one night, coming to sit next to her under the stars in the palace courtyard.
"I noticed, too, Sokka," she said. "I've seen her sneak out of the palace the last two nights after everybody retired for the evening."
"Where do you think she's going? And what's she been doing?"
"I don't know, but by the look on her face and her body language, I don't think it's good. I think we should follow her and find out what she's up to," Suki concluded.
"Suki, I don't know if that is such a good idea, you know how Katara is."
"I know Sokka, but I'm getting a bad feeling, and I think it has something to do with Azula. You told me how your sister was when you were there to watch her get her bending taken away."
"Well, whatever Azula gets she deserves," Sokka shot back. "She's crazy! A monster!"
"Sokka," she scolded, hitting him on the arm. "She might be crazy, but I don't think she's as much of a monster as people say she is."
"How can you say that? She's done horrible things. She tried to kill Aang and my sister, and she had you captured!"
"I know, Sokka, but she was deranged when she tried to kill Katara. And when I was in prison, I saw something in her that told me she wasn't a total monster."
"What are you talking about?" Sokka asked curiously.
"Well, when I was in prison, she visited me... several times."
"She was just trying to get information from you," he dismissed.
"Well, yes, but there was more to it than that. She seemed to show a level of respect to me for some reason. She told me she even respected me for my warrior skill. She would have me taken to an interrogation room and we would sit in there for hours sometimes. She would even share some of her meal with me from time to time. She never tried to hurt me, in fact, she never even spoke harshly to me." Suki took in a big breath and let it go slowly. "I don't think she deserves to be treated like an animal, Sokka. She's still human and I think she's just lost and need somebody to guide her in the right
direction. I think Katara has been going to go see her... and I don't think it's been to help her."
Sokka was silent for a good five minutes while he thought over what Suki said. Finally, he sighed. "I guess you're right. She shouldn't be treated like a caged beast, even if she is the most evil person in the world - next to her father, that is." He thought for a moment again, then said, "And I have a feeling you're right about Katara as well. She does hold a grudge, and she has been known to act on those she holds a grudge against."
"Okay... so we'll follow her then."
"Yeah... We have to keep our distance though, I don't want her to find out."
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Katara had Azula against the wall like she has the last couple of nights.
"Wipe that stupid grin off you face, you wretched witch."
"What's the matter, water bender, am I making you mad because you can't hurt me?"
"Oh, I'll give you pain, all right!" Katara yelled. Swiftly, she came within mere inches of Azula, took her thumb and drove it into Azula's broken ribs.
Azula screamed in agony - the pain was more than she could bear. Katara kept her thumb against Azula's ribs, pushing hard into the bruised and broken flesh.
"Oh, that's the spot. What do you have to say now, huh, princess!" Katara looked straight into Azula's eyes as she spoke, watching for any sign of weakness. She drove her thumb deeper into her broken ribs, savoring the way Azula's eyes opened wide, tears streaming down her face. The act had taken her breath and she tried to gasp for more but the pain wouldn't let her.
Just then the door shot open, and Sokka and Suki rushed in.
"Katara! What are you doing?"
Katara turned, her face full of horror. She let go of Azula who fell to the ground gasping for air.
"Katara, this is wrong!" Sokka shouted at her.
"What? You don't think she deserves it? She's pure evil!" Katara screamed back.
"Torturing her like this won't make the pain this war has brought you go away. You can't take the guilt of the Fire Nation's sins and lay them all on Azula. This war was started long before she was born." Sokka paused, and said more softly, "She's not the one to blame for mom's death."
"I can't believe you're defending her!" Katara said indignantly. "She tried to kill Aang. She tried to kill all of us!"
"Yeah, and Aang took her bending away," Sokka retorted. "And you heard what she said back then - what he did to her is worse than death to her."
Katara dropped her head and walked out the door. Before she made it out, she took one last look at Azula who was on her hands and knees gasping for air. Suki knelt next to her, trying to help her up.
"I'll follow her back to the palace and fetch a doctor. Suki you stay here with Azula."
"Okay, Sokka, but hurry up." Sokka flashed him worried eyes. "She's in pretty bad shape."
