Author's note: So much for updating once a day. I am rubbish at sticking by my resolutions. Anyway, I've quit my holiday job so I should be more free nowadays.
Chapter 9
"Haruhi, I need your help," I whispered desperately. The Club session for Friday had just ended.
"For?"
"Help me with my revision. Stay at my house for a week."
I could practically see a neon blinking signboard above Haruhi's head flashing the words 'NO FREAKING WAY'.
Haruhi was stunned for a moment before stuttering, "U-Uh, I'm so sorry but I need to stay at home and-"
"Cook? Clean?" I interjected, "I can loan you one of my maids. Free. No charge. PLEASE."
Haruhi hesitated.
"You can have everything you want. ANYTHING. Including an endless supply of Ootori."
Haruhi's eyes sparkled.
"Really?"
"Guides honour," I said, holding up my middle three fingers.
"Deal."
Little did we know, a pair of conniving ears were listening in to our conversation.
It was Saturday, the official first day of Haruhi's one-week stay with me.
"You live here?" Haruhi asked, looking up at the building in front of her in awe.
"Yeah, at the penthouse," I replied as I took Haruhi's luggage from her and led her to the lift. I lived on the 88th storey and I would be dead meat if my lift happened to break down one day.
Haruhi was shown to one of the guest rooms – a quaint little bedroom with nothing much actually. I hadn't gone round to decorating the rooms yet. After Haruhi settled down, I took her on a mini tour of the place.
"There are altogether 6 bedrooms and a library. Only 2 of the bedrooms are on use and the rest are for guests, if any. You are free to use the kitchen if you wish to. The maid only comes in with I'm not around so no one would be cooking for us. I mostly eat take-outs."
Haruhi nodded as she took in the large apartment.
Seeing as time is precious and waits for no man (or woman, for that matter), the two of us started our little intensive one-week mugging marathon. The studying was done in the library (duh) and it was mostly silent the whole time, except for when I had questions to ask Haruhi.
It was only 4 hours into the mugging session when I felt my concentration slip. I had been reading the same MCQ (Multiple Choice Question) for the past 10 minutes. We were supposed to answer 1 question in 1 minute.
I noted that forcing myself to go back into studying right then was no use – my mental stamina was downright pathetic. So, not wanting to disturb Haruhi, I decided to stay at my current position and do what I do best.
Colour up all the 'holes' in the 'O's, 'P's and 'g's. (and any other alphabets that was shade-able).
I was only halfway through the page when Haruhi noticed what I was doing. She shook her head and sighed.
"Robinson-san, do you wish to take a break?"
My head snapped up at her suggestion and I found myself nodding away enthusiastically.
"Can we have lunch now? It's almost 1pm!" I said eagerly, waving the take-out menus which magically appeared in my hands.
To say that Haruhi was taken aback was a slight understatement.
I continued waving the menus at her face while ranting off a list of highly recommended dishes from the various take-out restaurants.
I looked at the box of tissue paper in front of me with what others would tag as a contemplative look. But in truth, I was having an internal debate on whether I should abate my hunger by consuming a piece of the high-quality 3-ply tissue.
I had eaten tissue papers before. Countless time, in fact.
You see, when we were young and senseless, Leon and I held a bunch of stupid competitions between ourselves. Those ranged from normal singing competitions to water drinking competitions to competitions on how many baby hamsters we could get the mother hamster to eat.
…
I was just kidding about the hamster-eating competition. We were kids, not monsters. Though in retrospect, there really wasn't much of a difference between the two.
Anyway, we had a high frequency of tissue-paper-eating competitions. Not because we were fond of ingesting tasteless tissue papers (Actually
they aren't tasteless. They tasted quite a bit like writing paper.), but because the articles needed for this competition was easy to obtain.
I was just about to reach for the tissue box when the doorbell rang. It was a classic case of 'saved by the bell'. For that particular piece of tissue, I mean.
I immediately leapt off my seat and rushed towards the door with my keys at hand. I quickly released the safety latch and unlocked the door without even looking through the peep hole. This led to my downfall.
"Wha…"
"Now, close your mouth and let us in wouldn't you," Kyouya said.
But I was in the state of shock and I remained standing at the doorstep gaping at them.
"Neh, Vinny-chan, are we playing Taboo*?" Honey squealed excitedly, "I know, I know! GOLDFISH! The word is 'goldfish'! Because you are gaping like one! Neh, Takashi?"
Everyone, with the exception of Kyouya and Mori, sweatdropped.
"What are you guys doing here?" Haruhi had apparently noticed the commotion and had gone to check it out.
That was apparently the wrong question to ask seeing as it invoked a 1000 word essay-ish response from the half-demented Tamaki.
"- and that is why we are here!" Tamaki finished in a flourish.
Just as well, seeing as the time he spent talking was long enough for the urine in my bladder to crystalise.
"Someone," I let out a huge yawn," give this guy the trophy for the longest monologue in the history of mankind."
The twins sniggered and Kyouya's glasses sparkled just a little more brightly. Just as Tamaki was about to launch his barrage of verbal abuse at me, the delivery boy arrived.
"Wherefore art thou. Romeo!" I cried dramatically, looking at the delivery boy.
"Washing dishes," he mumbled, lifting up the plastic bag containing the orders to my face.
Unfortunately, my sustenance and I were separated by this damnable device called the 'metal grill-door thing'. That was also, coincidentally, what separated me from the savage beasts standing outside my door.
"You either open the door," drawled Banana 1**.
"or we eat your food." Continued Banana 2.
I mentally cried a river as I grudgingly unlocked the metal door.
Sidenote:
* In case you don't know, Taboo is this game in which someone has to act out something on a flashcard (no speaking) and the other people has to guess what word is the person is trying to act out.
**Banana 1 and Banana 2 are two twin bananas in this Barney-esque show called 'Bananas in Pajamas'.
