"She's not crying." Alicia shrieked. "Why isn't she crying?" she demanded, from where she lay, she couldn't distinguish a good view point of the infant but Will was at the end of the bed with the baby, she watched as his face turned pale white, and suddenly felt tears rush to her eyes.

"It's the cord." The doctor said, "It's wrapped around her throat."

"What?" she shrieked. Her heart suddenly felt ripped from her chest as her midwife and doctor rushed towards the corner of the room with her baby in their arms, Will was behind them.

Those minutes were indescribable, her mother and Sara had rushed to the baby, leaving Alicia alone to watch them from a far, it was a lifetime before she heard infant cries and produced a large sigh of relief. Wiping the tears away from her face, she watched as the nurse wrapped the tiny little creature into a warm towel before gently handing her in Will's arms.

His reaction lifted her spirits, he seemed slightly shocked, until the glimmer in his eyes returned, and a wide smile formed on his lips. His steps weren't hurried as he walked towards Alicia's general direction, his gaze never left the babys until he met Alicia. She didn't think the smile on his face could grow any bigger at this point, but it did, he found his lips pressed against hers softly before he settled their new born in her arms.

Little fists grew apart as fingers tried to distinguish themselves in the world, eyes fluttered open, searching for anything, toes curled and stretched, and Alicia was pulled away by the sight of her own tear falling apart on the infants fist.

"She's beautiful isn't she?" She heard her husband's sweet voice, Alicia could only nod in response as the smile she held grew wider.

"Have you found a name yet?" The nurse asked.

Alicia's eyes found Will's once again, she wasn't sure on how to tell him, they were two weeks away from the supposed birthdate, but she had already decided the name months prior when she recognized for the hundredth time Will's relationship with his mother. He raised his brow at her, as if knowing that she had one, and she nodded in confirmation. "Lenora."

"Mom… Please… say something.." her daughters voice brought her back to real life, disturbed the bells that were ringing in her head. Everything, the outbursts, the disrespectful comebacks, the lack of discussion, the constant tears; it all led up to this moment, this one conformation.

At one point Alicia had considered it being drugs, pregnancy maybe, or depression, but instead, it was something as simple as her sexuality? It was as though she had been thrown back into time, where her brother was just a teenager, and life wasn't as simple as facing that world.

Substitution and what may be considered as post-modernism was effective afterall, maybe in this circumstance. Both. Unless it was a source of joke on her daughters part, which given Lenora's sense of humour, it wouldn't be entirely surprising.

Alicia cleared her throat, and threw her mom face in. "If this is some type of joke…. I swear Lenora, it is not funny."

"That isn't the reaction I was hoping for." Her gaze rested on the ground as she pulled away a little more.

The retort was Alicia's confirmation. She had absolutely no idea how to broach the topic, maybe including a bit of humour to break the ice could be a formative starter?

"So you don't want to go to Georgetown huh?"

The seventeen year old snickered, eyes cast downwards. Alicia silently prayed for her to meet her gaze, but she refused, as if she were afraid, and Alicia's current demeanour was most likely not helping.

She placed her hand, gently on her hand and shifted closer. "How long?"

"How long have I not wanted to attend Georgetown?"

Alicia gave her a look that showed she weren't joking anymore, Lenora sighed, before shrugging.

"I don't know… A while?"

"How long is a while?"

"Maybe a year?"

"How did you know?" she stated calmly

"I just did." She said. "I never once liked a boy when high school started, I felt the opposite. I don't know why, at the time I didn't think much of it but then things started to change."

"Why didn't you tell me?" she demanded. "We could have talked about it Nora, you wouldn't have had to go through this alone."

"I was afraid that you would hate me!" she said. "Do you have any idea how difficult it is to just come out and say 'I'm gay!' to a family that doesn't even acknowledge God or any sort of belief system other than the law?"

"Whoa. What does religion have to do with this, and since when did you start believing in it?"

"I didn't, and I haven't!" she stated frustrated. Shaking her head, she sighed. "I was just afraid of your reaction mom. Beliefs never came hand in hand with you. And before you say it, I know that Uncle Owen is gay, but that is totally different because he's your brother and I'm your daughter, who also happens to hold grandmas name and entire legacy. How am I supposed to tell her?" she panicked

"Okay." She said flustered, placing her hands up. "One step at a time please."

"I know this is hard for you, but I just have to say it. Lenora, I am pissed, and I am absolutely appalled that you would ever think I would hate or disown you in some sort of way? And yes, Uncle Owen is my brother, but I love you ten times more than him." Realizing what she had just said, she shook herself awake and took it back. "No.. wait.. Don't tell him that. My point is, I don't understand why you couldn't have told me, I know things have been tough with your dad and I lately, but I thought that mine and your relationship would at least me intact."

"Mom." She mumbled. "I was scared." She shrugged. She had never looked so vulnerable and exposed in this moment.

On instinct, she dropped the cross examination and wrapped her arms around her. She warmed her arm as she rubbed her back and whispered softly. "Oh honey, I'm so sorry you had to go through this alone."

"Are you upset about it?" she mumbled into her shoulder.

Pulling back, she found that there were tears in her eyes, which caused her heart to shudder. "Does it look like I'm upset?"

"No, but I can't read your face, other than you're shocked, which isn't a good sign."

She could see that the paranoia was beginning to set in, she knew what followed next which was denial.

"You remember when you were seven and I was pregnant with Grace? When we told you it was going to be a girl, you had anxiety that we were going to leave you at the hospital in exchange for your sister because you thought she would be less messy?"

She nodded, Alicia felt a smile cross her lips just thinking about it. "Look where we are now huh? Your sister has to be reminded several times a day to clean her room, and your room happens to be the tidiest." She laughed, pausing, she stroked her cheek.

"Do you remember what your father and I said?"

"You said you would never disown me, or be disappointed because you loved me too much to pretend that I didn't exist. And then I asked you if you loved me more than Zach and you said.." Alicia covered her mouth before Lenora could continue, she laughed.

"Shhh! I can't believe I said that, I was only trying to make you feel better. I love you all equally, times Jupiter."

"Whatever." She chuckled

"That's so horrible, your brother would have cried if he heard me"

"You were in labour mom, nobody is going to punish you." A light chuckle escaped from her mouth, there was a silence, Lenora's gaze rested on the staircase, and she knew that she was anticipating the need to head upstairs.

"Soo…" she smiled. "You and Stacey?"

"Mom.. Don't make this anymore awkward than it already it is."

"Okay." She placed her hands up in defence. "Just being an overbearing mom, as usual."

Before she could really comprehend what was going on, Lenora's arms were around her shoulders as she hugged her tightly. "Thank you mom."

"I love you."

"I know, love you too." The teenager sat up and began to descend her way out of the room, Alicia watched her pause, turning around, there was anxiety in her shoulders. Alicia smiled with hope.

However the determination her daughter held seized her confidence a little. "You can't tell dad."

/

It had been a week since the confrontation, things had changed, Lenora was much more happier around the house, she was a totally different creature towards her siblings, she had even offered to assist Zach and Grace with homework, which at that point Alicia found the inevitable and asked if she had gone insane.

The kids were excited for Will's arrival, Lenora had been slightly hesitant, knowing that her mother wasn't good at keeping secrets from her husband now that Will would be in actual proximity, Alicia assured her that she wouldn't say anything, but Lenora could see through the wall and established that she would soon have to fine the courage to tell him, just as she had done with her mother, a boldly move on her part.

She rushed down the stairs as she heard his call, and jumped instantly into her father's arms taking him off guard. He spun her around just as he would when she was a child; dressed in pyjamas after a warm bath, awaiting his arrival from work. Alicia smiled from the kitchen as she heard Nora squeal, hitting memories that surfaced through her mind.

He had just finished hugging Zach, and ruffling his hair when she made her way into the hall. She wrapped her cardigan and arms around her waist, leaning against the wall, she watched as his gaze met hers. For him, the world paused. For her, she was nervous staring into his eyes, allowing him to think that she felt the same, that there was something more to this.

She smiled nervously, and dragged herself to his direction. "Hi."

"Hi."

If it were another time, if it were several years ago, she would have taken him into her arms, hugged him tightly and smashed her lips against his.

She could see that he wasn't sure on what to do in this moment as she walked towards him, for the sake of their children's presence, she immediately found herself wrapping her arms around his shoulders. His touch made her spine tingle, his scent, his warmth, everything, she would consider herself a liar and a hypocrite if she said she didn't miss him, but she also would never admit it either.

She felt his hands rest on her back and his short breaths in the crook of her shoulder, she wasn't sure on how long they stood there embracing one another's warmth, but when she opened her eyes and glanced around, the kids had disappeared leaving them alone.

They both pulled back at the same time, she smiled up at him, before pulling out of his hold completely, feeling the burden of discomfort, she caught the frown that surfaced to his features. She didn't want to cause the situation any less awkward, but forgiveness never really came hand in hand with her either, and she knew he was the same; she had grown to accept all his flaws, and that all this was her fault, but she couldn't necessarily comprehend why she was the one that was hurt when he was just as much of a victim as she was.