Act Two Scene 4

Fred and George were sulking. Not that this was particularly surprising. They sulked a lot.

After a few minutes of silence Fred looked at George. "Don't we have a scene right now?"

"Yeah, but who cares."

"Says the negativist."

"That's not a word and come on! It's not that bad!"

"Not that bad?" George demanded, sitting up and staring at his brother. "Were you coma tose for that last scene? Malfoy loves our sister!"

"So? I'm in love with my brother's ex flame and you fancy Pansy."

George sighed. "Fine, you win. Let's do our lovely scene. But just cause that git makes her happy doesn't mean I have to like it."

"Wouldn't dream of it that way." Fred said with a smile. He knew his brother well enough to know that the real issue here was that he didn't want to be in objection. George liked Pansy and he wanted to be okay with this so he could maybe have a chance with the Slytherin.

"So, where the devil is Romeo, eh? And let's pretend we didn't just see him."

"Spiffin' idea. His 'dad' 'says' he didn't come home last night."

"Why did you just bunny ear says?"

"Do you really think I would actually have a conversation with something that can't talk?"

"Touche. It's my line, isn't it?"

"Yes, George."

"He's just lustin' after Rosaline. You know, I'm getting to the point that I don't blame him any more."

"Pans sent a letter. Don't blame who? For what?"

"Bet it's a challenge. I don't think I can really blame Malfoy."

"Malfoy'll answer it. For fallin' for our sister?" Fred asked. It was ever a marvel in the Weasley household that the twins could hold two completely different conversations with each other at the exact same time.

"Any one can answer a letter. And yeah. I mean, come on, if it was her or Rosaline, which would you pick?"

"I mean he'll answer the challenge. Ginny's our sister. What the hell do you expect me to say?"

"Poor Malfoy's already dead. Rosaline killed him with neglect. I want you to tell me the truth. Which would you pick?"

"So if Malfoy's dead, what does that make Pans? What kind of thing are we talkin' here?"

"Blah, blah, blah. Vieled insults. Which would you rather have sex with?"

"I'm totally lost here, but let's just say I insulted her too. And, for god's sake! She's our sister man!"

"I'm lost too. Too bad. I mean if she weren't our sister."

"I'm kinda worried. We haven't heard about our paraphrasing yet. Okay. If we weren't in any way shape or form related, I suppose I would prefer Ginny."

"Good God man! She's our sister for pity's sake!"

"Oh here's Malfoy."

Sure enough, Draco stumbled on to the scene at that moment. He looked at them, the goofy kinda look still in his eyes.

"Well, well! You gave us a nice slip last night!" Fred said.

"Well, I was a bit afraid you would kill me." Draco said.

"That was a possibility," Fred admitted.

"See why I ran off?"

"Hmm. I do."

"What are you two up to?"

"Waiting for you."

"Why?"

"Cause we can."

"I guess that makes me lucky? Yes?"

"I suppose so. But luck is all in the mind." Fred replied.

"So says the single guy."

"George help me out."

"I most certainly will not let him!" Draco said, laughing.

"I think you're smarter than me. Besides, George can't fight."

"Is that so?"

"Watch it!" Fred said with a glower. "Or I'll smack you. Only I can make fun of George."

"You did start it."

"Did I? Shit."

"Well, George, what do you think? Does Fred deserved to be hit?" Draco asked of George who was by now in stitches. Really Draco kind of grew on you after a while. Maybe he could work this out.

"Mine own brother? You petition him for help?"

"Yup. Unless you want to change the subject."

"Wonderful idea! There once was a man from Nantucket-"

"Stop it!" George intercepted.

"Why? I haven't even done that much!"

"We can't corrupt him til he's officially part of the family, man."

"Oh, I suppose you're right. What say you, Malfoy?"

Malfoy however was distracted and laughing his ass off. Both twins followed his gaze and had to cover their mouths to stop from laughing.

"Oh, dear!"

"Is that...?"

Dennis Creevey was following Blaise Zabini. Blaise was still dressed as a woman and looking not too happy with this or the fact that Dennis kept trying to look up his skirt.

"Creevey..."

"What?"

"Stop it."

"Yes do!" Fred burst out. "We don't want to see that!"

Blaise spun around to them. "Don't say a fucking word."

"Good morning." Fred said with a broad grin.

"Fuck you."

"Oh, but it's almost noon!" Fred went on.

"You crack head."

"Isn't he?" Draco supplied, earning a chuckle from George.

"You're going to rot in hell, Draco. All of you will." Blaise snarled.

"Aren't you supposed to be helping me?"

"God damn it."

"Cheer up." Fred chortled.

"Fuck off and let me and Draco talk."

"Oh, Malfoy, got another girl? What happened to our sister?" George teased.

"You best to not cheat on her, Malfoy." Fred shouted.

"Will you two both shut up!" Draco growled.

"No!" Fred shouted. He jumped up on a low wall nearby and began to sing:

"Malfoy and Blaise!

Sittin' in a tree!

K-I-S--"

He might have finished but Draco grabbed an apple from Blaise's basket and with a shout of "Fetch, George!" threw the apple at Fred. Fred shrieked and toppled over the wall, apple, George and all.

"Stupid idiots."

"He just likes to hear himself talk."

Blaise studied his best friend with a critcal eye. "You have it bad!"

Dennis reached around to cope a feel of Blaise's fake breast. "One feels bigger..."

"Creevey..." Blaise growled. Dennis danced back, a grin on his face.

"Will you let me talk to Ginny?" Draco asked, forestalling the argument he saw coming.

"I can't. But I can relay messages." Blaise replied, distracted.

"Tell her I'm missing her and that I have a plan."

"What's the plan?"

"Tell her to come to Snape's Dun-- er, chapel today at noon and I will tell her."

"And do what?"

"Why get married."

Blaise blinked. "Uh, Malfoy, mate..."

"Look, it doesn't count in real life and she's cute."

"Noon?"

"Later if it has to be, but before three or else tell her to send you if she's changed her mind."

"You're a fucking fool."

"I know. But... I like her. A lot."

Blaise sighed and nodded. "Alright. I'll do it."

Draco grinned and danced off, on cloud nine.

"Creevey."

"Yeah, Blaise?"

"Let's get the fuck out of here."

"Right."

(A/N: (giggling) I love writing this one! Really I do. I apologize to anyone offended by Blaise's cussing.