Let me apologize for the length of this AN right off the bat. I just wanted to say that I don't take full responsibility for Yugi in this chapter. You know when authors say 'the character just took control and wrote himself'? Well that's kind of what happened here. I sat down, expecting to write the confrontation between Yugi and Yami somewhat like it played out in the show. However the second I started writing something totally different came out. I worry that Yugi will seem out of character because of this but, it came out of my head with such ease so I feel like it deserves to be here. Remember I am taking a few liberties with the story as I am adding scenes that we never saw as an audience but that I feel could have fit. So be gentle with me here, I am hoping this works out.
I've ventured so deep into my soul room that I hear nothing.
Not that there was much to hear anyway.
Yugi is silent.
I heard him thinking.
He's angry at me, because of what I was going to do.
But I don't understand.
I only wanted to win so that we could rescue his grandpa, now we have no chance.
I was trying to help.
Wasn't I?
But then I felt the power return, such power that I hadn't felt in so long, and I gave into it.
I welcomed it back happily, I reveled in it.
I shouldn't have.
I stop walking, I stand still.
Yugi was right. I lied to him, I broke a promise.
I became so blinded by power and the will to win that I became a monster again.
I cast aside all thought of anyone's safety and did only what benefitted me.
The voices whisper to me again now.
They linger just on the edges of my mind, praising me and cursing Yugi for stopping what should have been my victory.
I wish they'd stop.
I was wrong, I was so wrong.
I should have known better.
I did know better, I just chose to ignore it.
I embraced that power and because of that we lost the duel.
I could have found another way around Kaiba's tricks. We could have won properly.
Now I ruined any chance Yugi had at saving his grandpa.
I feel rage build up in me again, the anger grows, and it's painful.
The voices grow louder, my head pounds mercilessly.
To much pressure.
I failed Yugi again.
I take a deep breath; I can feel the third eye begin to glow on my forehead.
I am losing control.
I open the first door I can reach and step inside, the room is empty, it'll do just fine.
I step into the middle of the room, one hand braced on my head, trying to keep the pressure under control.
I close my eyes, put my hands out in front of me and let go.
The eye on my forehead burns so bright I can see the light with my eyes closed.
So much anger and rage rushes out of me it's almost painful.
The voices in my head curse me, they don't want to leave but I can't let them stay, they only hold me back.
They scream at me and I hear myself scream back.
And then it's quiet.
I open my eyes and find a mass of rubble at my feet. The room I stood in has been completely obliterated.
I am exhausted.
I walk slowly out of the pile of debris and collapse against another wall.
"I am so sorry Yugi," I say quietly. I doubt he can hear me; I am so deep in the maze of my mind. But a part of me hopes he can.
I want him to know that I am trying, I've realized my mistakes and I've come to terms with it and I won't do it again.
I promise.
After a while I get back up and continue walking. I can't hear Yugi or his friends but I can still feel his emotions. He's struggling, I can tell, but I don't know what to do. He wants nothing to do with me right now, there's no point in trying to talk to him. Instead I keep walking, moving through room after room, down endless hallways until I am utterly lost.
I hate this place.
I know pieces of my memory reside in here but I've no way of finding them, the rooms and halls are never ending and most of them are full of traps.
I close my eyes and will myself back to the start, when I open my eyes again I am facing the door to my room. Beyond it is Yugi's soul room but I've never ventured there.
I can feel Yugi's emotions stronger now, something must have happened because there's a sense of calm about him, the stress has faded away.
I don't ask, and I don't strengthen our link enough that I can see what's happening, he needs time, so do I.
I just hope he'll come to me when he's ready.
I wish I could keep track of time here. I don't know how long it's been. I sit idly on a staircase, watching the door to my room, hoping that Yugi will walk through it. I want to talk to him, to explain, but I want him to come on his own, I don't want to force him.
I sigh and close my eyes, hoping for some rest, my spirit is still exhausted.
I must drift off for a while; I wake up to a loud bang and find Yugi standing at the door to my room. I can't read the emotions on his face.
"Yugi," I start, but he holds up a hand to cut me off. I bow my head and let him continue, I am about to be scolded, I don't like it.
"You know you could have killed him?" He asks, I don't answer, just nod.
"We had a deal, you promised me you'd never hurt anyone again, you lied to me, you betrayed me!" His voice grows and when I look at him I see anger on his face.
"I only," He cuts me off again.
"No, you were about to seriously harm someone and I stopped you, and then you have the nerve to be angry at me, to call me weak? Yeah, don't think I didn't hear that, we're linked remember?" He walks up to me so we're standing toe to toe and even though I am at least a head taller than him, I feel minuscule under his glare.
"We got a second chance, Tea and Mia helped me, I have all my star chips back and we're in the castle now. We can rescue my grandpa but I need to know I can trust you," His eyes bore into mine and I can't help but wonder what ever made me consider him weak when he has the nerve to stand up to me?
"You can," I say quietly.
"Promise me, swear to me that you won't ever hurt anyone again," His voice grows louder again.
"I swear," I tell him, holding eye contact, trying to make him believe in me.
His eyes narrow and he holds my gaze a while longer.
"Alright," He says finally.
I release a breath I wasn't aware I was holding. Yugi may be small but his words are giant, he's able to frighten me and that's not something that's easy to do.
He turns to leave and I call after him.
"Yugi wait, can I explain?" He stops and shakes his head,
"I know you're sorry, I understand," He turns to face me again, his eyes are still sharp.
"But honestly I don't want your apology right now; I just want to make sure we can work together. Weather I like it or not I need your help, but if you're just going to continue to break your promises and harm people then I'll find a way to do this on my own." His words hurt; this is not the kind hearted Yugi I am used to dealing with.
I understand his anger with me, he's under a lot of pressure, I can't screw this up.
"I swear to you Yugi, it won't happen again, I'll help you save your grandpa, I promise." I try and put as much conviction and honesty in my voice as I can. I do mean it, every word. I feel horrible for what I did and I want to help Yugi as much as I can.
"That's all I need to hear right now, we can talk about you almost killing Kaiba after this whole thing is over." He turns around and without another word walks though my door, I jump at the sound of it slamming behind him.
He's still angry with me.
I feel about two inches tall, never in my life do I remember being cut down so harshly.
I take a deep breath and it's shaky.
Yugi is a lot stronger than I thought.
I open our link back up, just enough so I can hear what's going on.
If we're going to do this, we're going to do it as a team.
Our duel with Mai is a difficult one. Yugi still doesn't have full confidence in me and while he lets me take control he finds it difficult trusting me. Because of this it takes us a while to start inflicting any sort of damage on her life points.
"Yugi please let me help, we're getting nowhere, at this rate we still won't be able to save your grandpa." I plead with him.
His mental grasp on me his tight, he's allowing me to duel but he holds the strings, I do what he says and only what he says.
"Please, I promise I can control myself, I can do this." He must hear the honestly in my voice because I feel his grip loosen, he's given me a bit more control.
It's enough and with it we're able to defeat Mai.
Yugi takes control to watch Joey's duel with Bandit Keith. He does extremely well and with little help from Yugi or his friends. He's come a long way here; I know Yugi is proud of him, so am I.
Joey succeeds in beating his opponent; the semi final battle is decided.
Yugi will have to duel Joey.
"Are you nervous?" I ask, as Yugi stands alone in the hallway outside of the duel arena.
"A little I guess," he answers, his voice is softer, completely opposite from the harsh tone I heard from him earlier.
"Joey is a strong duelist but I wouldn't worry," I tell him
"It just doesn't seem right, beating my best friend," He shakes his head.
"But Joey understands what's riding on the outcome of the duel for you," I say, Yugi sighs.
"I know, but Joey has a lot riding on it too. He's trying to win the prize money for his sisters operation; he needs this just as much as I do." Yugi explains.
I'd answer but the doors to the arena open, the duel is about to begin.
Yugi walks forward and allows me to take control again. I face Joey across the arena, he smiles.
"I am not gonna go easy on ya Yug," He says, I nod in agreement.
"Neither am I Joey, and I'd expect nothing less than your best," I can see a more serious side of Joey come out.
He may joke and goof around any other time but when he duels it's like a calm comes over him. He's focused.
It is strange dueling against a friend. I may not know Joey that well myself but he is Yugi's friend. And I feel like I know him through Yugi's memories, and simply from the time they spend together.
Joey is strong, and he was honest when he said he wasn't going to go easy on me. For a while I worry that I might actually lose, Joey's strategy is powerful. But in the end it's me who wins out.
I know there are no hard feelings, and that makes the victory not so difficult. Even though we were each dueling for something important to us, because Joey is such a close friend he's still happy that I won.
There's not much time between Yugi's duel with Joey and the final duel with Pegasus. Yugi's friends join him for a few minutes and wish him luck. Bakura seems to hang back a bit which worries me; the power I can sense from his ring is stronger. I want to say something to Yugi about it but there's no time. More important things are about to take place.
"We can do this." I tell Yugi, he's appeared at the door to my soul room again.
"Pegasus is strong though, and he has a millennium item of his own." Yugi says.
"We have all of our friends supporting us, and the belief in our deck." My voice sounds positive but deep down I am just as concerned as Yugi.
Pegasus is powerful, the last time I faced him I lost. He uses his millennium item to see the cards in my hand. That's a power I am not sure how to get around.
"You must have faith Yugi, together we're stronger than him, and we will defeat him and save your grandpa, along with Kaiba and Mokobua."
Yugi informed me early on about what happened to the brothers, we're fighting for them as well now.
"That's a lot of pressure." Yugi mumbles, one day I'll tell him he needs to stop doing that, especially if he wants people to take him seriously.
"It is, but I know that together we can do this." He looks up at me and I finally see trust in his eyes again.
"Your right, I know."
I take control and make my way into the arena, Pegasus stands across from me.
I am not sure if it's Yugi's nerves or my own that I feel but I have a moment of doubt.
"Come on Yugi!"
"Yeah, kick this creeps butt!"
I turn and find Yugi's friends standing on the balcony. Tea, Tristan, Joey and Bakura, they smile and cheer me on.
The doubt passes.
I know we can do this. If Yugi and I work together, if we trust in our deck, and with the help of our friends we can win.
We will win.
