I've got no excuse. I was procrastinating and didn't start until about 5:40 on Saturday, upload day. So there's a good chance I'll get this one up late too. Sorry. Ishould be back on schedule next week.

2016-9 (2015-3) So that's what BYOD stands for…

POV: Composite

"Bring your own DEVICE!" The PFY cries in mock realization.

"Of course! What did you think it ment?" The Boss asks

"Bring Your Own Drink," the Bastard says, gesturing at a half empty case of chilled Newky Browns he and the PFY have been working on for the last half hour.

"Bring your own Dung," we say, holding up a plastic back holding a suspicious brown material. That portable digitizing laser Camanion gave us is blasted useful.

"Why would we want you to bring in your crap?!" The Boss asks, disgusted.

"I thought it was a pretty osikla idea," we comment.

"I thought it was Bring Your Own Dog," the PFY says, indicating a low growling from the old tape safe.

"You have a dog?" We ask.

"Nope! Found him in the park, though getting him in here was a real chore. Fought me the whole way."

"Why the hell did you bring a dog then?" The Boss is getting a little heated.

"Well, I was thinking about getting a dog a couple of months ago, and when I saw the Bring Your Own Dog day I thought if numbers were low you probably wouldn't have one again – so I brought one in hoping you might have a Bring Your Own Dog day again."

"BRING YOUR OWN DEVICE," the Boss snaps again. "DEVICE! Why the hell would we want you to bring your own dog anyway – or drink?!"

"Oh, I always have a couple of cases of Newky sitting under the server room floor in front of the process chiller output," the Bastard says "In case of emergencies. But I bought another couple of cases in for the Bring Your Own Drink day."

"DEVICE! WHO WOULD HAVE A BRING YOUR OWN DRINK DAY ANYHOW?"

"Well, we did think it was a bit foolish," we slip. Thankfully the boss interprets "We" as the three of us instead of "We" the single fusion entity, "But my coworkers said the same about installing Windows Vista – And Windows 8 – And had we known we would have said the same about having the users bring their personal devices for work use.

"And just how much of that have you had?" The Boss asks.

"Me? None. Those two have gone through about a case and a half though. I was about to go get another for them."

"Why not?" The Boss asks, confused.

"Because I don't like being drunk, unlike those two." The fact that we can't get drunk not withstanding.

"How did you misinterpret BOOD?"

"You mean it's actually a thing?" The Bastard asks innocently.

"Of course, studies show that 95 percent of people bring a device from home. If we use it we'll save a fortune in machines!"

"But pay a fortune in support," The PFY comments, "But what type of device are we talking, phones and tablets?"

"Whatever they want to bring in, laptops, desktops, tablets, it's all about savings."

An IM pops up from the Bastard Anyone got some old crap kit? I've got a VAX 11/780 and a memory expansion unit. Should make the Boss's office nice and cozy.

We'll see what our sisters have.

The Bastard speaks audibly, "But we'll have to deal with their virus problems, their slowdown problems, THE INCOMPATIBILITY PROBLEMS!"

"But 90 percent of the work is just emailing documents, so as long as it can do that we're saving money."

"One, we're still loosing money on support, and two, none of the reported problems will have anything to do with actual work. They'll have to do with ebbay and personal email and games and porn." The PFY says.

"But machines are a bigger spend than support. Besides, aren't your home machines higher spec?"

"Nope!" We say. Of course we don't have a machine at home, our work machine is home.

"So…" The PFY says, "you want US to bring Our machines in?"

"Just think of the company spend, if we save money on machines we'll have the money for that espresso machine you were looking at, or something else you really want."

"I'd really like another Newky Brown for a start," the Bastard comments.

"No more drink!" The Ex-Boss snaps. "I still don't get how you misinterpreted BYOD, there's been posters in the cafe for the last week!"

"That would be it. All we saw was the calendar appointment for 'BYOD.'" We say, "We haven't been to the cafeteria since we saw the delivery of Dog Rolls."

"Dog rolls?" The Boss blinks.

"Yeah," the Bastard says, "Slice them down the middle, cover them in sauce and diced gherkin, bake them or an hour and call it meatloaf special."

"Really?" The Boss gags.

"Sure! It's one of those cost-cutting measures. It's also a cunning plan by the Yanks to poison us all by putting too much seasoning to be safe." The PFY says, lurching off on a conspiracy theory.

"Not in here," we say, noticing the Boss is gulping more than he should, preparing for an emergency upload, "We just cleaned the carpets."

The Boss stumbles off to toss his cookies elsewhere, opening the one door he really shouldn't have.

"GET HIM POOCH!" We yell. Surprisingly the angry tan blur rips the Boss's leg open pretty bad on the way out.

"Run for the Cafeteria!" The Bastard yells, "And get them to throw a meatloaf at you!"


"Another Newky?" The PFY asks.

"Don't mind if I do," the Bastard says.

"Isn't the BYOD thing all week?" We ask.

"Yes"

"In that case…" We rez our Ki and place a call, "Hey sis, got any crap kit lying around?"

"Yep, why do you ask?" The Blue and pink Mobian fox who responds inquires

"It's BYOD Week."

"Enough said!" Camanion says happily.

Well, that's all so until next time, this is SabaraOne, logging out.