Spock could see beyond the fury in his friend as McCoy glared at him. He could see the man was looking for a reason he could fully grasp in this emotional moment. "But she has had for more experience with cases like this, Doctor. This is a poison foreign to our known sciences. Think, Doctor, think of what she said. Think of what she said to me. Do you not believe one can be possessed by a poison?"

"Of course there are some," the anger had left the blue eyes as McCoy looked at him then turned and looked at Kirk as he picked up another cloth to wipe Wainstone's body, "Well, don't just be standing there, Jim. We gotta keep this up till he wins his fight with that damned poison."

"Bones?"

"She said that he will be the possession of the poison till he collapses. The possession of the poison, Jim. We have to keep going. It's still not out of him yet. Well, don't be just standing there!"

That seemed not only to draw Kirk back to the task at hand but also from where his mind had started to go. He had stood looking at Wainstone and thinking over how his life would have been so different had his officer not done what he did. Thought of how he would have died. He thought of the times he and Wainstone had had talks about Wainstone's actions on some missions that he had not reported largely because to do so would have implicated himself as the reasons such actions had taken place.

As he watched the body under the cloth he was using to wipe it with contort Kirk silently asked the gods to let him talk with this man again. He remembered all that this officer had said to him down there and only now realized there had been so much pain in the voice. Pain that had not been evident when he had first heard, "Captain, do not move . . . nor make a sound." but that it was more even more strained later when he had said, "You've been . . . out of it . . . all night. I've done . . . all I can to get . . . you so you can . . . follow a track I . . . have made to a hut. You should . . . be able to . . . contact the ship . . . from there, Sir." and clearly the pain must have almost been unbearable when he had said, "At a steady . . . pace go one eighty-seven . . . paces straight . . .ahead. Bent branches . . . weeds point way. Clear. Go now, Sir." Then somehow to have found the will to follow the hunters who had been after him and save the woman and her children before letting the poisons possess him.

He was pleased to notice how the body was not as restive as before and was, after one convulsion that had both McCoy and Spock holding him down, now at rest. He was aware of Spock looking at him as McCoy waved the scanner over Wainstone three times and then nodded, "Okay, I can get M'Benga in to look after him while we all get cleaned up and some rest."

"Jim?" He felt the long fingers on his shoulder as he turned and looked at Spock. Nobody could tell him Vulcans did not have feelings. There was so much love and concern in the dark eyes he almost choked as he nodded.

"I'm fine, Spock. I'll, I'll just wait till M'Benga gets here." Kirk saw the moment of conflict in his Vulcan friend before there was the slightest of nods, "I'll catch up with you and Bones after M'Benga gets here.'

Spock started to turn but stopped as he heard Kirk very softly say, "I do not want you to be alone. I, I left you alone down there. I, I left you. A, a Cap, a Captain is," he turned to see his Captain and friend with a hand lightly touching Wainsone's face with his head bowed and slightly shaking and his eyes closed with the hint of tears about them.

Very slowly and gently Spock took Kirk's hand in his own and looked at Kirk when his friend turned to look at him, seldom had he seen such raw deep hurt and self-blame on his friend's face. It took him eight point one nine seconds to regain control of his own emotions before he spoke, knowing he had to reach his friend, reach deep into his friend yet still keep it official. It was clear something very emotional was in conflict in his friend and he needed to be away from here and away from rank and duty.

Spock swallowed to calm his own emotions then spoke firmly yet gently "Jim, he will not be alone. Doctor M'Benga will be with him and when he is finished and, when I know you are resting in your quarters, I will come back and be with him. You are not the only one who left him down there. Nurse Chapel can be with him while I escort you to your quarters."

"McCoy?"

Spock had hoped Jim would not ask about McCoy so soon. When he had left the room with McCoy he had waited in McCoy's office with him until McCoy had contacted M'Benga and then quickly applied just enough pressure to McCoy's shoulder to put him into a light sleep, eased him onto the fold-out cot, watched as Nurse Chapel gave him a look of total understanding as she put a blanket over the doctor and started to follow him as he returned to the emergency trauma room. "I persuaded him to rest as well, Jim." It was not totally a lie, more what Jim would call a redirection of the truth. "I will escort you to your quarters now. Nurse Chapel is here."

Kirk was aware that Spock was walking just that quarter step behind him, that quiet support that he had been for so long and so many times when he had needed that quiet presence. It was as they were walking to his quarters that he realized they had not talked, it was then he realized he had not spoken with his friend about how this must have been so very hard on him. Oh, they had exchanged the official type words but they had not really talked with each other, not about what needed to be said. He had been glad that McCoy had been with Spock while he had been on the planet being hunted but knew that this special being would have been enduring a Vulcan version of hell. He also wanted his friend to understand what he had seen in the room when he had touched Wainstone.

Once in Kirk's quarters Spock was, if he would admit it even to himself, stunned to see how Kirk just stood looking totally lost in a very familiar place. It was clear that now, as some part of Jim knew he was safe, he could just mentally sort through all that had happened and as he was doing that he was remembering things that horrified him, frightened him. Spock saw him clench his fists, bite his bottom lip as he closed his eyes, bow his head as tears started to fall, and his shoulders started to shake.