It has been six days since Zoro broke up with Sanji. Six days since he left his boyfriend on a billboard and flew off into the night alone. He felt lousy that night when he got home but he had expected his mood to improve in the following days, but that wasn't what happened. He felt worse and worse, he felt lonely without Sanji and he found himself spotting things in movies or in the world around him that he knows would interest the demon only to remember that they're not together anymore.
He had tried to train with Kuina to snap him out of his funk but all he had got was his ass kicked once and then again when he'd refused to divulge the reason for his state to his sister. He'd been losing focus in class and his friends were noticing that something was wrong. For example he suspects that this coffee break with Franky was more than just coffee.
"Here you go buddy, a fresh cuppa joe." Franky says brightly, setting a cup down in front of Zoro. It's the generic white takeaway kind from their campus coffee place, it's even got the little plastic to-go lid on the top.
"Thanks." Zoro replies with as much feeling as he can muster.
Franky sets his large body down in the chair opposite Zoro in his workshop, being a PhD student in advanced magical engineering he gets his own workspace. Partially from the prestige of the position and partially because no one else wants to be near his inventions if and when they go wrong. Franky could have got his PhD instantly if he'd submitted his own body as his thesis. When he was younger an accident had caused him to meld magic and metal together to repair himself and he just kept going ever since. His body was once human but now is decidedly more and less than human all at once. No one else has been able to replicate his work since and Franky has flat out refused to let people examine his inner machinations, he said he didn't like people knowing how he ticked.
One of the perks of the work space that Franky has is a private place to meet people. Namely somewhere that Franky can talk to Zoro in private where he has no excuse to hold back on his answers.
"How's things?" Franky asks casually as he drinks his own drink.
"It's fine. Aced my summoning test." Zoro answers with a shrug.
He sips his own drink but freezes when the taste of it hits his tongue. Warm frothy milk foam covered in chocolate powder. His brain makes the quick step to Sanji eating chocolate for the first time and then their breakup, that's got to be the fastest leap that he's taken yet. What the hell is the matter with him?
"Uh… that's good… you don't look happy though bro." Franky says slowly and Zoro realises that some of what he's feeling must be showing on his face.
Zoro glares at his offending coffee. Franky is just doing this because Robin has guided him into it, goodness knows how many of his friends suspect that something is up and he can't tell them about Sanji. Sanji is a demon and their relationship isn't something he can just be upfront about, as much as he dislikes lying.
"Zoro?" Franky asks softly, setting a hand gently on Zoro's shoulder. Up close he can hear the slight turning of gears inside Franky's large forearms and the warm weight of his palm on Zoro's shoulder.
Franky's face is… worried. He's his friend and he's worried about him and Zoro's treating him, treating all of his friends, like they're adversaries to outsmart and deceive.
"You dated people before Robin, right?" He asks Franky a little uneasily.
"A few. Truth be told I'm not sure I could have handled Robin if I didn't have some experience with dating." Franky says with a slight chuckle.
Like Sanji who had never dated anyone before Zoro and Zoro knows that he can't be the easiest person to date. But there's nothing unreasonable about Zoro's demands on their relationship is there? Although that should be past tense, he doesn't have a relationship with Sanji any more and doesn't have any current demands on him at all. Zoro's insides feel unpleasantly hollow.
"Can you keep a secret for me?" Zoro asks, looking up at Franky again.
"Within reason. But as long as you're not about to get yourself killed doing something dumb or do that to anyone else then I think we're good. What's up?" Franky says with a smile, and though he's joking Zoro is almost certain that the specific confession that he was dating a demon would count as something dumb that could get him or someone else killed. Best to keep it vague then.
"I was dating someone. I wanted it to be secret from all of you because… well… you know what it's been like before." Zoro says hesitantly.
"Are you referring to the time when Nami threatened to break your ex's legs for being a jerk or the guy that Robin caught talking about all of the really sexual things he was gonna do to you so she hexed him?" Franky asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Wait, I never heard about that second one. When was that?" Zoro asks with wide eyed shock. Franky laughs a little nervously.
"Oh, you never heard about that? Well, you didn't hear it from me that's for sure. Yeah, she didn't much care for him talking about you like that so she hexed him. Every time the guy thought about you in that creepy kind of way he'd feel like she was crushing his nuts. I guess she wouldn't be Robin if she wasn't beautiful and terrifying." Franky laughs loudly.
"Great. Well, you can see why I didn't want to tell everyone. I liked the guy, I didn't want people hunting him down just to look after me. I'm fine on my own." Zoro says petulantly.
"I'm guessing that things aren't fine though." Franky says.
Zoro taps the edge of his coffee cup and thinks about how best to explain himself.
"I told him not to do something and he did it anyway. He followed me to my test the other day, he could have got hurt or killed or got me expelled or in big trouble. I told him no and he ignored it, like they all do and I know where that shit goes. So I broke up with him." Zoro says sharply and angrily.
Franky seems to consider this for a moment or two before speaking.
"That sounds really rough, I'm sorry." He says carefully.
A silence falls between them and Zoro continues glaring at his cup.
"I had every reason to break up with him, I was completely in the right. But I can't stop thinking about him and- it's so FRUSTRATING!" Zoro snarls angrily.
"Like your head and your heart are pulling you in two different directions." Franky concludes with a nod of his head.
"Yeah, well, my heart's a moron." Zoro grumbles bitterly and drinks his coffee. The chocolate powder still makes him think of Sanji. His stupid heart aches for him and for the millionth time he crushes the feeling down mercilessly.
"No it's not, you're just bad at listening to it. And your follow through is totally black and white when you do. You either love people or you don't care about them, you throw yourself into a dream or you're not interested at all. Grey isn't your strong suit Zoro. But relationships are messy and grey lots of the time." Franky says with an air of exasperation.
"So I should do what? Listen to my heart all the time and remove my brain? If I did that I'd still be giving my creepy ex from two relationships ago 'one more chance' every damn week as he tried to talk me into bed!" Zoro argues.
"There's that black and white again. No, Zoro I'm saying that you make a balanced decision and once again… ENGINEERING CAN FIX ALL PROBLEMS!" Franky declares loudly, springing to his feet and rushing to the other side of the room.
Zoro blinks a few times in bewilderment as Franky rummages through drawers for things.
"Didn't Robin say a while back that just because you can fix your problems with magical engineering doesn't mean you should?" Zoro asks warily.
"Hey, I made an anti-noise machine that specifically filters out the sound of her neighbours dog barking before 9am or when she's watching tv. She's changing her mind on engineering, mark my words." Franky says, waving a small hammer in Zoro's direction.
Zoro isn't especially convinced but he continues to drink his drink while Franky works. He looks at his hand while Franky does his thing. The floating arrow above Zoro's palm jerks suddenly in a different direction and Zoro frowns at it. The damn thing has been broken since he and Sanji broke up and it doesn't take a massive leap of logic to guess that it's locking onto wherever Sanji is on Earth and pointing him that way.
A chunk of metal being dropped on the table before Zoro drags his attention back to the present. It's a heart made of gold, probably only the size of his thumbnail and Zoro can still see the slick sigils of the spell running over its surface. It's not complete yet.
"I need your blood." Franky says quickly and jabs Zoro in the tip of the finger with a needle to draw a bead of blood out. He then presses Zoro's finger against the metal and the spell clicks into place.
"You could have not used a body part that I'm going to be touching things with all day." Zoro grumbles and looks down at the heart.
"Quit complaining." Franky says and sits down again with a pleased grin on his face.
"This is your brilliant solution? This is a charm for pre-teen girls. Those stupid 'tell your heart's desire' charms that they sell for stupid slumber parties." He says irritably. He bled for this crap?
"Bah, a weak imitation of this. This thing will tell you in simple yes/no responses what your heart really feels. All subjective truth with pinpoint precision. With this you can discern how you really feel in your heart and then make an informed choice about whether to listen to one or the other or compromise. Go on, try it." Franky insists.
Zoro looks at him dubiously but Franky is clearly not to be swayed. Zoro picks the small gold heart up and lets it settle in the middle of his palm. If this thing gives true/false and yes/no answers then he's going to need to know what's what.
"Okay… let's test this. I love my sister." Zoro says clearly and calmly. It's a true a statement as any, even if he sometimes wants to wring her neck as well.
The gold heart in his palm glows an even brighter gold and feels warm to the touch. So now he needs a no, something a definitely doesn't feel. He could just reverse his previous statement of course but…
"I think all of Franky's inventions are dumb." Zoro says with a grin.
"Hey!" Franky protests. The heart in Zoro's hand glows white and feels as cold as ice, it looks like it's a literal game of hotter or colder.
"Just seeing if it knows how I really feel." he says smartly and Franky rolls his eyes.
Zoro returns his attention to the heart. Where should he start?
"Stalking me is the kind of thing my creepier ex boyfriends would do." Zoro states. The heart glows gold and warms in his hand.
"I can't trust people who do that." Zoro continues. Instead of staying warm though it goes cold, it thinks he lied or that he was wrong at least.
"Could be your wording. I mean, you have trusted someone who did that so clearly you CAN." Franky points out reasonably.
"Oh, good point. Okay… I don't trust people who stalk me." Zoro says.
The heart glows white and stays cold.
"Your stupid thing is broken Franky." Zoro says irritably.
"Is it? Do you still trust the guy? Do you believe that he'd really hurt you or do something really bad to you?" Franky asks him seriously.
Zoro looks away uneasily. He tries to think of Sanji attacking him but his mind immediately corrects him that Sanji couldn't do that, he physically can't do anything to Zoro's body that he doesn't consent to. He's not bound to follow Zoro's orders of course or else he never would have ignored Zoro's instruction to stay behind but that's different. What about not actively harming him but letting him come to harm? He tries to picture Sanji just watching as Zoro falls off of a cliff or gets hit by a car but it just feels false. Sanji spent ages trying to find a planet that would be safe for him.
He still trusts Sanji.
"I… still trust him." Zoro says quietly and the heart goes warm and glows happily.
Zoro drops the thing on the table and it stops glowing any colour at all.
"So my heart is a moron just like I said." Zoro says, feeling angry at himself for being so foolish.
"Grey areas Zoro, how about this? I ask you questions and you tell me what you think your answer is and we see how you really feel." Franky suggests and drops the gold heart into Zoro's palm again.
"You were happy dating this guy." Franky states.
"Yes, I was." Zoro agrees and the heart backs him up.
"You were worried that this relationship was going to blow up badly like your others have." Franky says thoughtfully.
"Well, yeah." he agrees, the heart continuing to match his answers. At least he's pretty honest so far.
"If a relationship is going to go bad you'd rather it happened sooner rather than later." The engineer continues.
Zoro thinks about his longest relationship and how much it hurt when everything finally ended with it. The longer he was with someone the more it hurt when it ended, or that was the general rule of thumb anyway.
"Yeah." Zoro answers.
"So when this guy did something bad that reminded you of the kind of stunts your ex boyfriends used to pull you cut it off to save yourself the pain." The blue haired man says calmly.
"What?! No!" Zoro denies hotly, only the heart in his hand suddenly goes ice cold. Franky just looks at him skeptically.
"He shouldn't have followed me!" Zoro insists and the heart warms back up to room temperature.
"He knew what he was doing." Zoro says firmly but the heart goes cold again. Did Sanji really know that it was wrong? The guy had stupid ideas about how romance and surprises went, he had given him a planet as a present for a date after all. He was a demon, they had different cultures and everyone made mistakes didn't they?
"I don't regret what I did." The heart goes colder still.
"There's no reason to miss him." It's unbearably cold to the touch.
"I don't want him back." Zoro says weakly. The pain of the metal is sharp and biting against Zoro's palm and when Franky takes his hand it becomes clear that it's frozen itself to the top few layers of Zoro's skin.
"I'm not saying you should always do what your heart says, sometimes your heart is dumb. But it's kind of smarter to know what it's saying before you decide. Hm… this isn't too hot, it'll do." Franky says as he picks up Zoro's nearly empty drink and gingerly pours the warm liquid on Zoro's palm, heating the heart and detaching it from his skin.
A red heart shaped burn sits in the middle of Zoro's palm accusingly.
"What do you think I should do?" Zoro asks unhappily.
"I think that you need to work out for yourself what you should do. But it can't hurt to call him, right? If you still think he's a jerk and it's just a bad break up then go back to not talking to him." Franky suggests as he picks up the small gold heart and cleans it off with the hem of his ugly hawaiian shirt.
"And you've got this, in case you need to know what you feel again." Franky adds, dropping it into Zoro's uninjured hand.
"I guess." Zoro says with a nod.
"And hey, boy problems or not you still have your friends. I know Luffy's planning on dragging everyone to the fair tomorrow night, nothing will snap you out of a funk better than seeing some sucker challenging Luffy to an eating contest." Franky says brightly.
Zoro puts the heart into his bag and considers Franky's words. He could go home and summon Sanji and see if he really did make a mistake, then even if it goes badly he'll still have a good time with his friends the next night to make him feel more normal. Doing nothing clearly isn't working, it's screwing with his studying and his training with Kuina.
"Yeah… I guess. I think I'm gonna go. Thanks for the heart and the coffee." Zoro says slowly, standing up and putting his bag on again
"Any time, and just remember that it's another problem solved by engineering!" Franky says brightly.
"Yeah, yeah. Doesn't mean I'm changing my major to magical engineering. Thanks again for the coffee." Zoro says with a laugh and stands up and swings his bag over his shoulder. He leaves Franky's workshop with a wave and heads off campus. He was done with classes for the day anyway and the studying he was planning on doing can easily be done at home.
On his broomstick flight home he goes back and forth in his mind about whether or not to summon Sanji. Intellectually he doesn't feel like he did anything wrong. Sanji crossed a line and Zoro has no interest in seeing him become a terrible ex, it's best to cut that off before it truly starts. But his heart makes that decision feel unfair and cowardly. Sanji was new to this and he screwed up, and things had been going so damn well until then. Unnervingly well even.
He lets himself in through his window and sets his broom against the wall. Even if he didn't change his mind on being with Sanji didn't the other man deserve a chance to explain himself and at least get a proper goodbye? And Zoro's not totally sure he should be saying goodbye to him at all.
Damnit.
He doesn't like making mistakes but it's shameful to make one and refuse to admit it or refuse the possibility of even making one. Most religions used to list pride as a sin, those who follow them still do and it's one thing that Zoro thinks they have a point with.
He paces back and forth in his living room thinking about what to say to Sanji and coming up with no one right answer. Eventually he gives up and faces a clear space on his floor and utters Sanji's incantation. The syllables of his true name taste bittersweet on Zoro's tongue.
Fire bursts forth from the floor and when it recedes Sanji is standing in Zoro's home again. Except he's dressed in nothing but heart print boxers with messy hair, crooked glasses and a toothbrush in his mouth. Zoro just barely stifles the laugh at seeing him but when the sudden realisation of just where Sanji is occurs to the demon Zoro can't restrain himself any more.
"What the- shit!" Sanji splutters around his toothbrush and frantically summons some clothes onto himself and throws the toothbrush into the air where it vanishes in a burst of flame.
"Sorry, sorry I shouldn't laugh. But- oh that was great. You can spit that toothpaste in the kitchen sink if you want though." Zoro offers helpfully but Sanji shakes his head and swallows thickly.
"It's fine, it's not like I'm a stranger to swallowing." Sanji remarks, making Zoro snort in amusement.
Zoro's mirth wears off and he finds himself just standing there looking at Sanji, his now ex boyfriend who looks nervous and ill at ease. It's Sanji who speaks first.
"I thought I'd never get to see you again." Sanji says and his voice is quiet and wary. His pale hands are tense at his sides and he looks like he's restraining himself from doing something, though Zoro doesn't know what.
"Same." Zoro agrees quietly.
"I'm sorry!" Sanji blurts out. He looks heartbroken and desperate, leaving Zoro to feel like a total asshole.
"I'm sorry for following you, I just-" Sanji starts to explain, his tone rushed and urgent.
"No, you don't have to. Don't say anything." Zoro interrupts and Sanji shuts up but looks uneasy doing so. Zoro supposes that he doesn't know if this is good or bad.
Zoro looks at Sanji and opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. Sanji deserves better than this, he should hear the truth that's in Zoro's heart because his head's already blown this before. But Sanji looks wary of him, of what he might say. Does the demon really think that Zoro just summoned him here to yell at him some more? What a shitty first boyfriend he's been to Sanji. Sanji who got trapped up here and thought only of being apart from his loved ones, who begged him for a second kiss for free, who gave him a goddamn planet.
But his head is pulling him in another direction. This can't work, he's lying to his friends and he likely will never be able to honestly introduce them. They're totally different species who are at war with each other and even if it works out Sanji will probably outlive him by a billion years, it's doomed to failure.
He can't say that to Sanji and he can't keep standing here frozen and muted because the words won't come to him. He's stuck.
But… maybe Franky is right. Engineering can solve his problems.
"Hold that thought, I just need to grab something." Zoro says and darts across the room to his bag. He pulls out the heart and closes his fist around it before returning to Sanji who is now just looking bewildered.
He should start with things that he knows are true and work from there.
"I'm sorry." He says simply and his hand warms around the golden heart. He really is sorry.
Sanji doesn't look especially reassured.
"I shouldn't have left you on that billboard or said the things I did. I could have handled that… better." He continues, his hand staying warm. He's being truthful.
"No, Zoro you don't need to apologise. I fucked up and-" Sanji starts to say but Zoro shakes his head.
"Oi, shut up. I'm bad enough at this already without you interrupting me. Just let me talk." Zoro snaps at him and though the blond does indeed shut up his tail lashes from side to side in irritation. Contrite or not he's still Sanji and apparently Sanji doesn't like being bossed about. Or at least he doesn't like being bossed about by someone who's not about to be eaten.
Zoro needs to make this good. The ice burn on his palm is proof enough that he doesn't want to lose this so he's got to go for it. He should take it like sparring with his sister, have an objective and push for it. He has to stay on point and not get sidetracked. If he confesses too much and falls flat on his face then so be it, at least he will have tried.
He ignores his head warning him that it'll all go wrong sooner or later and starts to talk again.
"I really like you and I liked being with you. I've honestly never had a relationship as good as this one." Zoro admits and his hand blooms with warmth from the heart inside it, recognising his truth. Sanji smiles, small and grateful with tiny fang points just becoming visible.
"Honestly I think it was freaking me out a little that it was going so well." Zoro adds. He's aware now that he's been thinking that way but who knows how long that fear has been growing from a small seed?
"Why? What did I do wrong?" Sanji blurts out in worry.
"Nothing, it's not you, it's me." Zoro answers and Sanji scowls.
"Did you seriously just say that?" Sanji asks, clearly unimpressed.
"That's… not how I meant it. What I meant is that all my past relationships have ended really badly, I'm used to it. And I know that I'm not exactly an easy person to date, I'm grumpy and obsessive about school and swords and I only like men romantically and I don't want to have sex with anyone. So all of my old relationships blew up in my face and this one hadn't!" Zoro blurts out, he can tell it's nonsensical and stupid but it's true.
"What? No, you're not some burden Zoro. I'll kick your ass for saying that!" Sanji snaps angrily at him.
"We both know you can't." Zoro points out.
"You'd be surprised with how creative us demons can be about getting around restrictions like that." Sanji retorts and Zoro grins. That's the Sanji he knows, underneath the inexperienced nervousness anyway. And speaking of which…
"I'm pissed about what you did, it was dangerous and dumb and I'd never forgive myself if you'd been caught." He says firmly.
"I'm really sorry." Sanji apologises meekly, his tail wilting and curling sadly around his legs.
"I know. But this isn't your world and I knew that, and this is your first relationship at all and your first relationship with a human. I'd be an idiot to think that you wouldn't fuck up something." Zoro says calmly.
Sanji shifts from foot to foot and looks decidedly uncomfortable. He opens and shuts his mouth a few times before screwing his eyes shut and speaking again all in a rush.
"It wasn't totally an accident. I knew there was a risk, that's why I hid far away from everyone. I just wanted to see you do magic because I know how hard you study and I wanted to be part of that. And I'd hoped that maybe some of your friends might be there and I could maybe… run into them and get introduced." Sanji's voice gets smaller and smaller as he talks, like he doesn't want to say what he's saying but has to.
The blond sighs and rubs his hands over his face, going across the room a little to sit on the arm of the sofa.
"It wasn't some big plan I had or anything it was just… spur of the moment. But I was selfish and dumb. And the really ironic part of it is that you had told me no and that should have meant that I couldn't do it, consent is written into my biology." Sanji laughs flatly and humorlessly.
Zoro covers his face with a hand and groans. Sanji is still a demon and it's not smart that he keeps forgetting all that it entails.
"So what was it? Your obligations to listen to me when I say no don't stretch that far or my wording was sloppy?" Zoro asks.
"Wording. You didn't actually say 'no' exactly. You said that our date was off and told me what might happen if I went and that you'd summon me later. The no was implied enough that I wouldn't have been able to push you to let me come with or at least it would have felt really bad for me to try but going somewhere that happens to be the same place on my own…" Sanji trails off.
This is why demonology is a required class, at least to the basic levels. You can't deal with demons without understanding the slippery logic that they use. They simply HAVE to obey rules that they're bound to, not doing so ranges from either physically impossible to fatal for them. But they are masters of squirming around their obligations. He shouldn't leave anything implied, everything has to be explicit. Clauses have to be iron tight and with no bad grammar or undefined slang.
If Zoro had been making a contract with a demon he would never have left it as loose as that. But he hadn't been, he was just talking to his boyfriend who happened to be a demon.
"I knew you meant no and I've been kicking myself for being an asshole about it. I just had this fantasy of how things might be, ever since I met your sister I wanted to get into your life more. Maybe it's creepy or maybe romance movies, books and magazines have melted my brain. I don't know." Sanji says miserably.
"You could have just said something." Zoro points out reasonably.
"Yes, thank you. That seems very obvious in hindsight, can you go back to the bit where it's not my fault 'cause you expected me to make mistakes please?" Sanji snaps angrily and Zoro laughs despite his best intentions to keep a straight face.
Zoro opens his hand a little and sees the glint of gold between his fingers. He's got to keep going, give an honest response to how he feels about that new information from Sanji. He knows that he wants to save this, maybe even needs to but he's not going to lie to do it.
"What is that?" Sanji asks suspiciously, leaning over and peering at him.
"It's… my friend Franky made it for me. My friends know me well enough to know that something was up since… since I left you. But because I didn't tell any of them about us they didn't know. So he tried to help. I told him some things but nothing that'd put you in danger." Zoro assures him.
"Okay, but what is it?" Sanji asks and peels Zoro's fingers back carefully.
Thin pale fingers with slightly pointed nails run over the golden heart and Zoro feels a shudder of excitement run down his spine. He supposes that it's not too strange to think that since the heart shaped chunk of gold has a connection to his heart that it wouldn't go both ways. So to have someone who already has a place inside his heart touching it when it's connected to him is something else entirely.
"Is that a burn?! Did this thing hurt you?" Sanji demands suddenly, having nudged the heart out of the way enough to see the burn from before.
"It gets cold if I say something that I know in my heart isn't true. Franky gave it to me because I was having trouble working out how I was feeling." Zoro admits as Sanji peers at the injury. It's only a couple of layers of skin deep, it stings a bit but it's fine. Yet Sanji is looking at it like it's serious harm. Zoro doesn't know if Sanji is just being protective or if humans really just seem fragile compared to demons, most of whom are cockroach like in their survivability.
"What did you even say to make it get cold enough to burn you?" Sanji asks, looking up at him from where he's sat on the arm of the sofa.
"I don't regret what I said." Zoro repeats and the heart goes cold against his palm and Sanji's fingers. The demon looks at it in alarm.
"I don't miss you." He adds and the heart goes colder still.
"If it burnt you the first time then don't keep saying that shit! How dumb are you?!" Sanji demands, snatching the cold heart from Zoro's hand.
"And… I don't want you back." Zoro finishes. Sanji frowns and looks at the heart in his own hand which is now frost free.
"It didn't go cold that time. Does that mean you really don't want me back?" Sanji asks hesitantly, looking from the heart to Zoro.
"No, it means that my friend Franky isn't an idiot that lets his devices have extreme thermal reactions when they're not being used. It's activated by my touch. I can take it back and say it again if you don't believe me." Zoro offers and Sanji holds the heart away from him like he thinks that Zoro's going to leap for it to get it back if he doesn't keep it safe.
"I think one dumb looking burn a day is enough for you." Sanji retorts.
A silence grows between them and Sanji is chewing on his bottom lip in either nervousness or uncertainty, Zoro isn't sure which.
"So what now?" Sanji asks quietly.
"Well, we could date again if you want." Zoro offers and feels for a moment like he's in freefall, waiting on Sanji's answer to see if he'll fall flat on his face or not.
"I'd really like that." Sanji says with a slow smile and Zoro's chest suddenly feels a little too tight.
He rubs the mark on the inside of his palm with a finger and looks at the pretty, wild haired blond before him. There's still a slight toothpaste stain at the corner of his mouth that he apparently hadn't caught earlier. It's ridiculously endearing and Zoro almost doesn't know what's happening to him. Still, if he gets to be with Sanji he's okay with it.
"Can I kiss you, you dumb idiot human?" Sanji asks, reaching out and tugging on Zoro's shirt until he leans down.
He kisses Sanji and it feels like it's been far too long indeed, from Sanji's eagerness he clearly feels the same.
"This would be easier if I had some other way of contacting you besides summoning you." Zoro says when they part. If Sanji feels like he's too far out of Zoro's life then it would be easier if Zoro could just text the guy, but it's not that simple.
"That would be better. Not that I don't like being embarrassed by showing up here in my underwear when brushing my teeth but a little warning would be good." Sanji agrees with a roll of his eyes.
"Well if I could have called your or texted you I would have but you were in hell and it doesn't work that way." Zoro says a little defensively.
"It… it does work that way! Oh god I'm such a moron. I keep forgetting how good human phones are now, you're finally up to the versions that we had ten years ago!" Sanji exclaims, smacking himself on the forehead.
The blond snaps his fingers and a phone drops into his hand. Zoro's never seen it before but he sure as shit recognises the distinctive apple logo on the back.
"Whoa, hey, let me see that." Zoro insists, reaching out but Sanji bats his hand away.
"No, no, no. We've got a deal with these companies and we're not allowed to share that tech with humans. But I know that I can make your phone compatible with mine. Most demons have phones that work topside and back home, especially demons like me who spend half our time up here. I just need to alter the card in your phone to make it work, so, gimme." Sanji insists, holding out his hand expectantly.
Zoro stands up and pulls his phone out of his pocket and gives it to Sanji. Through some elaborate fiddling and bitching about how 'out of date' Zoro's phone is he manages to get the sim card out and casts some kind of spell on it before putting it back in. He's really cagey about letting Zoro see any of it so Zoro does his best to not eye it up too much. Sanji checks the settings a few time between the two phones before he's happy, then enters Zoro's number into his own phone and calls him. To Zoro's surprise, his phone rings.
"And this works even if you're in hell?" Zoro asks in wonder, cancelling the call and trying to save Sanji's number into his phone.
"Better there actually, perfect signal everywhere and internet too. Earth is a nightmare in comparison. Obviously it won't work elsewhere though, so not on the moon or your planet." Sanji answers with a shrug.
"You guys would probably find getting people into hell easier if you advertised the perfect reception and free wifi. Hey- why is my network Vodafone now? And why is your number twenty five digits long? And it… goes all weird and glitchy if I look at it too long." Zoro says, squinting at the line of numbers which shifts and warps under his eyes. He's seen high level magical scrolls that do that but nothing digital.
"Yeah, maybe don't look at that too hard. Just give my contact a name and don't open the number part again." Sanji answers dismissively.
Zoro takes his advice and shifts his attention to the 'contact name' section. He can't write down Sanji's actual name, that'd be unadvisable and his phone doesn't have the characters for its true spelling anyway. He's not sure if he'd have the same problem if he anglicized his name but he's not willing to risk it. So he needs to come up with a new name for him, a nickname as it were… something perfect…
Zoro types 'curly brow' into the contact name and saves it.
"Fucking seriously?" Sanji grumbles and quickly types on his phone before holding it up to show Zoro his own phone number reading as 'shitty moss'. Sanji looks outrageously pleased with himself.
"Smartass." Zoro says and elbows Sanji onto the cushions of the sofa.
"Does this mean I'm going to have to pay vodaphone now? You never said why my network changed." Zoro asks again, looking at the changed line of text at the top of his screen.
"Oh, it's our network is all. It's free for us and now you. There's no downtime or anything, not when you're on our side." Sanji answers with an idle wave of his hand.
"That's not what I've heard about them before." Zoro says dubiously.
"Oh for humans it's just bait for gathering rage energy, a good number of demons need it to survive and we use it as power sometimes. Especially the 'customer support' lines." Sanji explains with a laugh.
"That's… evil." Zoro says, feeling somewhat impressed by the scheme.
"Demons." the incubus points out and flashes him a fanged smile. Zoro supposes that he shouldn't be surprised.
He looks down at his phone, examining it for any other infernal signatures and focusing on its energy as much as he's able to but it just seems like a normal phone to him. So that's that then, a simple solution for what seemed like a complex problem. He and Sanji can keep in touch even when they're not on dates and they'll communicate better.
Only that's not solved the whole problem. It's still good but it's not everything. He still hates lying to his friends and Sanji still wants to meet them.
"What's wrong?" Sanji asks uncertainly and Zoro looks to the side to see Sanji watching him with worry knotting his dumb eyebrows together.
"I don't like hiding from my friends, lying, not talking about you." Zoro answers honestly as he turns the phone over in his hands.
"But you don't want to introduce me." Sanji says.
"No, I do want to. You'd really like them I'm sure, and they'd really like you too…" Zoro says slowly.
"So what's the problem?" Sanji asks, clearly feeling offended.
"They'd like you plenty if you were human, or at least not a demon. But since you are and I like you better alive it's not something I can do." Zoro says a little sharply.
"Well… what if we do what we did with your sister? I pretend to be human, or human-ish and get to know them and then when they like me which they obviously will we tell them what I really am." Sanji suggests hopefully.
"Did you miss the bit where I don't like lying to my friends? Besides my friend Robin is half siren and her trances make people obedient and truthful, if she got curious about you she could make me tell her everything about you. Not to mention Brook is a litch and it's my understanding that the undead are pretty good at spotting demons." he points out and Sanji's face falls.
"Really really good." Sanji agrees unhappily.
Sanji sighs and falls back on the sofa and scowls at the ceiling. His tail is smacking angrily on the edge of the sofa and Zoro once again finds himself wondering just how aware of it Sanji is when he's not actively trying to make it do something specific.
"Didn't you people used to hunt down and kill litches?" Sanji asks.
"Five or ten years ago, yeah. But they're still people with thoughts and feelings, no matter what some idiots say. It's not even like Brook did that to his own body, not that it'd make how people treat him better if he did." Zoro says bitterly. Brook tends to let other people's dickishness roll off of him with a laugh and a joke but Zoro knows that it does sting him sometimes.
"Your friends can be friends with the undead who have a history of eating humans but you don't think they'd accept me?" Sanji asks pointedly and Zoro opens and shuts his mouth a few times. That's a damn good point. Learning to like Sanji can't exactly be hard can it? He caught on to Sanji being a person real quick.
"I think… if they know about you as a person for a while, through me I mean. Then I can maybe introduce you to them one at a time. Brook might actually be a good first person for you to meet." Zoro says and watches as Sanji's face lights up with delight.
"You really mean it?" Sanji asks with wide eyes.
"Yeah, yeah I do." Zoro says with a nod. His heart feels warm at the idea and though he's pretty sure that this is the best plan he could make for introducing Sanji to his friends it's still really risky. He's torn between his head and his heart again but maybe for a change he can listen to his heart a little more.
