Disclaimer: Nope, not mine. Never will be. Dang it all.

A/N: Thanks for sticking with me. Would you believe this story has taken on a life of its own? Is that normal? When I wrote up the first draft way back when, the characters, by now, were all living happily ever. Huh. It seems that The Muse has other, far different plans, than what I/we started out with!

So, hang onto your hats; we're in for a rough ride here. This story was originally rated "M" for sexual content; this chapter contains offensive language of the NC-17 variety, violence, and disturbing content. If this sort of thing offends you, please do not read - you have been warned!

The door closed behind us with a snick. The office was dim even at the height of noon and smelled of dust and worn old wood, of age. The very air was stuffy and still, the only sound that of a fly buzzing on the smudgy window pane. Teaspoon rose from his chair as Buck and I approached him.

"Buck, Lou. I'd like ya to meet Lieutenant Harper. He will tell ya all ya need to know. Lieutenant Harper, this is Buck Cross and Lou McLeod; they will be making the delivery."

The Lieutenant stepped forward from beside Teaspoon; he looked at me and Buck appraisingly, as if sizing us up, before extending his hand. "Mr. Cross...Mr. McLeod."

Lieutenant Harper was dressed in clothing like that worn by any of the men in Rock Creek on any given day. He stood tall, taller even than Noah, with thick black hair and bright blue eyes. He looked as though he had spent much of his life working out of doors; the callouses on his hand attested to that.

For some reason I felt could trust him. I wondered if Buck felt that, too.

"Mr. Hunter has already briefed you, I believe, on the nature of this mission" Lt. Harper began in his deep voice. We nodded and he continued.

"I cannot stress enough the need for secrecy and that the documents be delivered as quickly as possible. I cannot divulge to you exactly what it is that you will be carrying." He paused, then turned to Teaspoon.

"Mr. Hunter - do your riders harbour prejudices against the Union, conceal sympathies for the Southern rebels?" He fixed Teaspoon with his piercing blue eyes.

"Lieutenant" Teaspoon said, hooking his thumbs in his suspenders, "why don't ya ask them fer yerself?"

Lt. Harper looked at Teaspoon for a second longer, then turned once again to me and Buck.

"Do you, Mr. Cross, harbour prejudice or ill feeling towards the Union?" He held Buck's eyes with his for a long moment.

"No. I do not" Buck answered firmly.

"Mr. McLeod?" He fixed me with his gaze

"No. I do not." I spoke with absolute conviction.

"Do you, Mr. Cross and Mr. McLeod, harbour sympathies for the Southern rebels?" He looked from one to the other of us.

"No" Buck answered.

"No" I spoke firmly.

"Will you remain loyal to the Union for the duration of this mission and afterward?" the lieutenant asked.

"I will." Buck and I spoke at the same time.

"Very well." Lieutenant Harper handed Buck a rectangular envelope with an elaborate red wax seal holding it closed. "This, Mr. Cross, is to be carried in your saddlebag and remain there at all times. Upon arrival at Green River, go straight to the tents of the Union Army outpost. Ask for Major John Paul Calder - he will be expecting you tonight. Major Calder stands six feet two inches tall, has silver hair and brown eyes, and a chip out of the inside of his right front tooth. By these things you will know him."

The lieutenant walked over to the door. "You are performing a great service to your country. Be swift, and be vigilant. Southern rebel spies may lie in wait; the usual point of attack lies between Big Sandy and Green River where the country is sparsely populated and cover is abundant near the river. Shoot to kill." Once again he extended his hand. "Godspeed to you both."

Teaspoon joined us at the door. "Buck, Lou...there's nothin I can tell ya that ya don't already know. Be wary, ride fast. Keep yer eyes and ears open and don't stop fer anything along the way." He opened the door for us. "I don't want to see ya back here for another three days - yer goin ta need some time to yerselves afterwards and sides that, ya just plain deserve it." He looked at us and sighed."Ride safe" he said so quietly only we could hear. The door snicked shut behind us.

My boots made hollow sounds on the boards beneath my feet. As I walked along with Buck to the hitching rail, I slowed for a brief moment and looked at the scene before my eyes, at the main street of Rock Creek with its storefronts and children running into Tompkins' to buy penny candy. I untied Lightning, checking that the cinch strap was snug, and smelled all that was familiar: horse sweat, dust, manure, wood, smoke, cooking food. I mounted up and as I wheeled Lightning around beside Spirit I drank in the sounds of children laughing, horses neighing, shouts of greeting, faint piano music from the saloon. Poised for flight, I turned my head to meet Buck's eyes watching me intently.

"We'll be back, Lou" he said quietly, with conviction.

Was that what I had been thinking?

"Aim own p'ayle doe, naw mahyehn." His voice carried with it his quiet strength. He raised his eyebrows at me; I nodded, determined.

We kicked the horses into a gallop westward towards South Pass.

The sun beat down heavily from a pale blue, brassily hot sky. The landscape was completely dry, void of anything truly green; even the leaves on the trees were a dusty grey colour. The hooves of our galloping horses raised a cloud I was sure could be seen for miles around, and I wondered if the fellas could see it all the way back in Rock Creek as a puff of dust on the horizon.

We arrived in South Pass without incident. It was a small station, really just a cluster of wooden buildings. We pulled up at the hitching rail, which thankfully was in the shade, and unbuckled the saddlebags from the backs of our saddles. Tears sprang to my eyes as I whispered goodbye to Lightning; he nickered and nuzzled my cheek. From beside me Buck spoke in Kiowa to Spirit; she rested her head against his chest.

The stationmaster appeared, leading two fresh horses: Buck was given a wiry bay gelding named Thunder and I was handed a spirited red and white paint mare named Flash that reminded me much of Katy. The stationmaster was a burly young man named Goode. He had run the station since it first opened and knew of any and all happenings for miles around.

Goode and Buck spoke back and forth as we buckled our saddlebags to the backs of our saddles. I half-listened to them; I was more curious to know what it was that Buck had said to me in Kiowa just as we left Rock Creek. Then, while I drank from my canteen, my ears pricked up at something Goode was saying.

"Keep your wits about you" he said. "My riders comin back from west of here say they'd been watched. Couldn't say by who and ain't none of them been attacked, just a real strange feelin. Like they was waitin for somethin to happen. Don' know if it's Injuns or the war comin this way...somethin's gonna happen, and soon."

Buck and I quickly exchanged glances; I felt a shiver down my spine and his eyes darkened. Feeling grim, I mounted Flash. Beside me Buck mounted Thunder; we wheeled the horses around.

"Take good care of them for us" Buck called.

"They'll be waitin for ya when ya get back" Goode said cheerfully. "Ride safe!" he called as we spurred the horses into a gallop.

The dusty miles rolled away beneath the horses' hooves. From South Pass we rode into Pacific Spring; from Pacific Spring to Dry Sandy. We were given water at each station and fast, reliable horses. The landscape began to change bit by bit as we rode on, becoming gradually greener and a little more lush. We stopped at the Big Sandy river to let the horses drink; Buck and I stretched and drank from our canteens.

The sun was still well above the horizon and that bode well for us; the longest leg of our journey still lay ahead. "What do you think?" I asked Buck in a low voice; I was loathe to speak any louder. No one knew what lurked in the trees and the undergrowth around us.

"I don't hear anything. I don't feel anything." He raised his head and remained stock-still. "The land here is still at peace" he said very quietly. "It is best that we go and get to Big Sandy quickly while it is still day. The longer we take, the greater danger we will be in."

We galloped off, following the river and the sun. We came upon Big Sandy, a small town on the river. The Express station had a bunkhouse and a home house as well; it was large and clean and well-kept. Tom Southem, the stationmaster, greeted us at the hitching rail with our horses: Twitch, a strawberry roan, and her brother Blink, a blue roan.

"They're good and they're fast" Tom said. "They can wheel on a dime and blast outta the gate in a heartbeat" he said with pride; he had bred and trained them himself.

"Good - we need to get to Green River before nightfall" Buck said honestly. "Have you heard of any ambushes between here and Green River lately?"

Tom looked thoughtful. "No ambushes, no attacks in the last few days. All the riders is been sayin's that they been watched. Can't see who's watchin 'em. They feel eyes watchin, so they just ride through fast's they can. Spooky, like." He looked at me and Buck. "You best get goin, it's a long stretch from here to Green. Ride fast through the trees along the river; when there's been trouble that's where it happens. Your horses'll keep you on their backs, they don't let their riders down." He patted his horses on their necks. "Do your job" he said to them.

We mounted up for the last time that day. "Godspeed to you both" he said as we turned the horses to the sun.

We rode hard, harder than I'd ever ridden even for the Express. I concentrated grimly on the task at hand; I knew in my gut somehow that we would not finish the ride unscathed. I knew that Buck, even as we galloped, was watching and listening intently for any signs of trouble or even just other travellers along the trail. It was a well-travelled route, used by Express riders, the Union Army, and travellers heading both east and west. We were also in Indian territory - Cheyenne, Arapaho, and Sioux, Buck told me. I was more grateful than ever that it was Buck I was riding with, for he spoke the Lakota language of the Sioux.

Strangely, though, the trail was all but deserted. We passed families travelling by wagon from Green River to Big Sandy, both men and women armed, and hastening to journey's end before dark. We stopped to let the horses drink often, and out in the open. They seemed to know the trail well and I guessed that Southem's horses often travelled west, to Fort Bridger and Salt Lake City and beyond.

The air very gradually began to grow cooler, degree by degree, as the sun slipped lower in the sky. I began to feel glad to have the hot dusty journey coming to an end. I guessed that it was past supper time, was past after-supper chore time; I wondered which of the fellas would be heading over to the saloon. Cody had the early-morning run; he'd be disappointed that he couldn't stay out late without paying for it the next morning. I wondered how Emily liked Ike, when they'd see each other again.

I gave my head a shake; I had no business thinking of anything except the job at hand. We had just over an hour of daylight left and if we wanted to make it to Green River before dark we needed to push hard. I turned my head to Buck and opened my mouth to speak

my eyes grew wide

my jaw dropped

Buuuck!

I called from a great distance away

Twitch shot forward like a bullet

Blink on her heels

shots behind us angry shouts

it's just a breed and a kid

search em dammit

I shook with fear oh God if they find out I'm a woman they'll rape me they'll kill Buck Twitch come on girl PLEASE girl RUN Buck where are you

fire men with torches men in brown men in grey they talk with an accent ...where have I heard...? THEY'RE FROM THE SOUTH THEY'LL KILL US

around us all around us Southerners oh God horses the horses fire Twitch rearing BUCK WHERE ARE YOU man tall man grabs reins

Twitch pranced nervously but the men with torches had drawn back. A tall man with sandy brown hair and rot like moss on his teeth jerked the reins. From the corner of my eye I saw another man holding Blink's reins.

"Who are you, boy?" the tall man snarled at me in a thick Southern drawl. He seemed to be the leader. I opened my mouth to speak but found I couldn't. The man grabbed my collar and pulled me down towards him.

"I asked you a question, boy" he snarled into my face; his breath stank like rotten meat. "Who are you? Where you goin?" He gave me a shake. "Well?"

"Leave him alone" Buck said from beside me. "He's just a boy - I'm taking him to his family in Fort Bridger."

"Shut up, you." The shorter man holding Blink's reins spat in Buck's face. "I ain't talkin to no low-down scum-suckin breed" he sneered. "You one o' them dirty cock-suckin

Sioux bastards thet been givin us so much trouble? Huh? Is yore mama a squaw, Injun? White man done fucked yore mama an' you's what she got? Huh?"

"Leave him be!" I shouted. "He ain't done nothin to you! He's my guide - he's taking me to my family in Fort Bridger!"

The tall man backhanded me across my face. "Shut it, you puny little shit bastard or I'll cut of yore nuts iffen I can find em." His eyes glittered with malice. "Might jest cut em off anyhow."

The group of men with torches was growing restless, I noticed. There were about eight of them, ten men in total, and my heart sank - we were well and good outnumbered. The Southerners wouldn't let us go forward at any cost - they would drive us back with the torches, get us off the horses, search the saddlebags, and kill us. I felt sick inside. It would take a miracle to get us away from them.

"Come on, Leyrisse!" one of the men shouted. "Get on wi'it awready! They's just kids - useless bastards!"

"Shut it, Bouchard!" the man holding Twitch's reins shouted back. " I'm done when I says I'm done! An' I'm jus' gettin' started." He turned to me. "You - get off yore horse." I hesitated and he backhanded me again. "Do it, boy!" I stumbled down off of Twitch and fell to my knees, grabbing her mane as I went down. "Get up" Leyrisse hissed.

""Get down here, Injun" Buck's captor snarled. Buck slid down from Blink's back. I caught Buck's eye; he looked grim and mad as all hell, but not afraid. He gave an almost imperceptible nod but I didn't know what it meant.

"Hands on yore head, boy" Leyrisse hissed. I quickly set my hands on my head. "You too, Injun" he snarled at Buck; he put his hands up. "Y'all jes' stay put now an mebbe you won't get hurt."

He searched my saddlebags and found nothing but my gear and a change of clothes. He swore and jerked his head in Buck's direction; I felt my blood turn to ice as his saddlebag was opened and searched as well. His gear was torn apart and scattered all over the ground.

"Cocksucker!" Leyrisse screamed. "Damn it to hell!" He handed Twitch over to the man holding Blink. "We'll keep the horses - they's good'n'fast. But these two - they's got to go. Take the food an' their clothing - an' their guns."

Two of the followers picked up our scattered belongings, and I was glad I wasn't carrying anything of value for these scavengers to take. But what on earth, I wondered, had Buck done with the letter? Why hadn't the Southerners found it? And were they going to take us prisoner or just kill us outright?

Just then Leyrisse kicked me in the shin, and I doubled over in pain. "Stand up, Yank scum" he hissed. "Take off yore gunbelt. You too, breed" he snarled at Buck. We unbuckled our gunbelts and threw them on the ground. "Gimme thet purty knife o' yorn" he said to Buck, who untied the sheath from his boot and set it on the ground beside his gunbelt.

"Thet's good, Injun, thet's right good'n'propah." Leyrisse grinned at Buck. "Let's see how good thet purty knife works. Bouchard, Nelson" he jerked his head at the two men. "Hold him."

They handed off their torches, then grabbed Buck by the arms, pinning him. Leyrisse advanced on him, holding up the knife.

"Sho' do got lots o' purty hair, Injun. How many men you done scalped with this here knife, huh?" Buck stayed silent, impassive. "I asked you a question, boy." When Buck refused to answer, Leyrisse punched him in the stomach so hard he vomited. "Ah don' like you" Leyrisse hissed in a low, deadly voice. "Ah think you should die now."

He drew up the knife to Buck's throat and held it, poised. Suddenly I was screaming, screaming; Leyrisse was crazy, a madman, a cold-blooded killer and he was going to kill Buck with his own knife.

Leyrisse howled in rage and grabbed me hard, shook me until my teeth rattled. I fought him though there was nothing I could do and he covered my mouth with his filthy hand. I bit down, hard, and he released me. I grabbed at the knife as it dropped from his hand and lunged at him; blood dripped down from his face.

He shrieked in rage and pain; the men holding Buck let go of him and rushed at me; Buck grabbed the knife and swung round in a circle, opening their flesh as he went. Leyrisse screamed at his men, who dropped their torches and ran at us. I was pinned to the ground, the madman's blood dripping onto me. He groped my chest.

"Ain't nothin' but a woman kin scream like thet" he said with a venomous hiss. "Ah'm gonna fuck you so hard you split in two then I'm gonna blow yore fuckin' head off, cunt."

The world exploded around me. The thunder of hooves shook the very ground, the screams of men and horses filled my ears. A booted foot kicked Leyrisse under the chin and he rolled off of me, dead, his neck snapped like a dry twig. Buck's strong hand helped me to my feet. He gave me a push. "Run!" he shouted.

I stumbled off towards the trees and cover. Dazed, I took in the sight of men shooting and falling, of fire all around, of dead bodies, of Indian warriors on horseback.

And then they were gone.

One lone warrior remained. He walked up to Buck, leading Twitch and Blink. Buck took the reins from him and began leading the horses to the water. I scrambled to my feet and ran to Buck; he dropped the reins and held me tight, tight in his arms. "Lou" he said in a low voice. "This is Red Bear. My brother."

I turned to the tall warrior, proud and noble, so much like Buck. "You saved our lives" I whispered.

The tall proud man regarded me. "My brother has chosen well" he said, his voice deep. "He has chosen a woman of beauty, strength, and great courage. You have the heart of a warrior, little one." He turned to Buck. "Come to my village in the dawn, when your mission is over. Follow the fork of the river that turns north."

He mounted his horse and, without looking back, disappeared into the trees and was gone.

There was nothing left to do but go on. We picked up our gunbelts and Buck his knife; we salvaged all of our belongings that we could. I checked Twitch for any sign of injury; miraculously, there was none. Buck likewise checked Blink, who was also unharmed. He touched my cheek and despite his gentleness I flinched.

"I wish I could have killed him myself" he said in a voice I'd never heard. "Red Bear killed Leyrisse."

"Buck, why - ? How did they - ?"

"I honestly don't know, Lou" he said, looking into my eyes. "I can only guess that they've gradually been pushed back further and further west. But how they happened to be here at this very time - I don't know."

We let the horses drink at the river's edge, and we drank from our canteens. "We'd better go while there's still any light at all" I said in a low voice.

Buck nodded and we mounted up. The fires from the torches were all but out. Turning, we urged the horses into a gallop westward.

The sun was a fat reddish coin poised on the horizon as we cantered up to the Union Army outpost at Green River. Reining in the horses, we dismounted and asked the first soldier we found where Major Calder might be found.

"Private Grissom" he said with a grin, by way of introduction. "And you are - ?"

"Buck Cross and Lou McLeod of the Pony Express. We have a delivery for Major John Paul Calder."

"Right this way." Private Grissom led us to a large tent slightly removed from the others. He stood at attention and called "Major Calder, sir!"

A tall man with silver hair and brown eyes stepped to the open flaps of the tent. "What is it, Private Grissom?"

Private Grissom saluted the older man. "Buck Cross and Lou McLeod of the Pony Express, sir!"

The major returned the salute. "Thank you, Private. That will be all."

"Thank you, sir!" The private saluted and quickly departed.

"Mr. Cross...Mr. McLeod...I am most happy to meet you." We shook hands. "I see that your journey has not been without event."

Buck and I exchanged glances. "Yes, could say that" Buck said with a slight grin.

"Do you know who it was that attacked you?" the Major asked, concern showing in his eyes.

"It was a small group of Southern rebels, sir. They ambushed us between here and Big Sandy along the river where the trees are thickest" I said.

Major Calder raised his eyebrows. "You're fortunate to have escaped" he said, impressed. "The Confederate spies are thirsting for information and are nothing short of desperate. Others besides yourselves have been ambushed, and not fared out so well."

"We had help, sir. Indian scouts saw us and saved our lives" Buck said.

"Do you know which tribe it was that helped you, son?" Major Calder asked respectfully.

"It was the Kiowa, sir. My people" Buck said with quiet pride. "All they want is to be able to live out their lives in peace, as they have for generations."

Major Calder shook his head regretfully. "No one wants this war to happen, boys. All these good people just want to live in peace. But the time has come for us to stand up for the freedom we believe in." He sighed. "Now. I believe you have a letter for me."

"Yes, sir." Buck stepped outside the tent to the horses and the Major and I joined him. Buck unbuckled his saddlebag and dug down to the very bottom. He slid his fingers into a nearly invisible slit in the leather near the seam and drew out the envelope, slightly the worse for wear. "Here you are, sir."

"Very clever, son - a false bottom in your saddlebag. I'd be willing to wager your saddlebags were searched." The Major's eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled. I saw the tiny chip on the inside of his right front tooth.

"They were, sir." I shivered, remembering the terror I'd felt as they searched Buck's saddlebags.

"Boys, you are more than welcome to stay here tonight as the guests of the Union Army if you so desire" Major Calder offered.

Buck and I looked at each other. "That's a very generous offer, sir, but I think Lou and I are ready for a steak dinner and hot baths at the local hotel" Buck said with a grin.

"I thoroughly understand, boys. I give you my most humble and grateful thanks for a good job well done. The Union Army thanks you."

We shook hands with Major Calder one last time, then mounted up and rode into the town of Green River.

The horses were soon bedded down at the small livery stable. Buck and I were fortunate to have gotten the last available room at the Green River hotel; we soaked in a hot bath together before dinner downstairs.

"I could go to sleep right now" I mumbled, leaning back against Buck's solid chest. He held me tighter in his arms and kissed the back of my neck.

"You need to get something to eat first, love" he whispered in my ear and I shivered as his warm breath caressed my skin. "Would you like me to wash your hair?"

Buck washed my hair, then I returned the favour. When we were dressed in almost-clean clothes, we ate dinner in the small dining room downstairs.

"You were right." I smiled at him across the table. I wished I had been able to bring a dress with me; I so wanted to look nice for Buck...but the thought of Leyrisse finding a dress in my belongings gave me a cold shiver down my spine.

"Right about what?" Buck raised a dark eyebrow at me.

"About getting something to eat. I feel like a new - person." I'd had to remind myself I was still dressed like a boy. "Do you want to take a walk - or go back to the room?"

"I think I've seen enough new scenery for one day" Buck said with his lopsided grin. We paid the server and went upstairs.

Buck locked the door as I drew the drapes closed. I turned and looked at my face in the mirror.

I had large purple bruises down one entire side of my face where Leyrisse had twice backhanded me. Buck came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me, tight. He had a long cut starting at his temple and running down to his chin. I shuddered, thinking of what had almost happened to us both.

"Put it from your mind, Lou" he whispered. "It's over - we're safe now."

"I know" I said, turning in his arms and putting my arms around his neck. He leaned down close and kissed me long and slow and deep.

I began to unbutton his shirt, kissing his smooth brown skin as I went. He unbuttoned my shirt and slid it off, drew my silky chemise over my head. I untied his trousers and they pooled at his feet. My trousers were the last to go; when they were off, Buck picked me up and carried me over to the bed. He gently set me down then got in beside me. We drew the covers up partway. I snuggled deep into his arms.

"I am so very glad to be here with you, Buck Cross" I said, kissing the hollow at the base of his throat. "I'm glad it was you I was riding with today."

"I never want to see you in danger, Lou" Buck said. "But I'm glad I was with you. Red Bear is right - you are a woman of beauty and strength and great courage. I love you, Lou." He kissed me behind my ear.

I arched my neck as his mouth found my breast, smiled and gasped with delight when his lips suckled and his tongue swirled around the hardened nipple. All of my blood rushed down to that place between my legs, where I was hot and swollen, lush and liquid, so ready for him already...I had never felt so alive as I did right then.

I reached my hand down to grasp his manhood, long and hard and thick, and caressed him. He moaned and arched his back, thrusting slightly into my hand, and I drew the foreskin back to expose the purple tip. I moved down his body and took the head of him into my mouth, tasting the slightly bitter source of his warrior's strength.

"Lou..." he whispered hoarsely, his fisted hands grabbing at the sheets. I drew my tongue along the underside of his member to the cluster of skin bunched under the head and to the very tip of him. Releasing him, I moved back up his body and he opened his eyes; they burned with the fire of passion. His hand moved between my legs and found the center of all my pleasure; at the pinnacle of ecstasy he plunged into me and I clutched him as we moved together hard and fast and rough. Our slick bodies rode out the storm as Buck thrust up against the mouth of my womb and I gave a strangled cry.

We lay in each other's arms, sweaty and panting and sated. I got up, moving stiffly, and poured a glass of water from the pitcher on the desk. I drank thirstily and poured out more for Buck, who drained the glass in one long swallow. I got back into bed and nestled into his arms.

"We'd best get some sleep" I murmured into his ear. "We've another journey in the morning."

"Yes...I am so glad that Red Bear has asked us to come to his camp" Buck said quietly. "My heart wept when he dismissed me the last time I saw him...I thought we would never meet again in this life." He turned and kissed me on the mouth. "Aim own p'ayle doe, naw mahyehn."

I looked up, into his eyes. "Buck...?"

He closed his eyes and drew me in closer. "I love you, Lou."

A/N: Whew...what a ride! That's one ride they'll never forget; I know I won't!

As I said before, everything except the Pony Express stations is fiction. And I made an error last time around; Big Sandy and Green River are the fourth

and fifth stations west of Rock Creek, not third and fourth. I have been reading up on American history, especially the Civil War, and discovered that

soldiers from California were dispatched east to New Mexico and Arizona to get rid of Confederate forces that moved in there. So I thought, wouldn't

it be neat if the Express riders helped deliver the orders from Washington out to California? Just an interesting little diversion!

On to Red Bear's camp...as always, let me know what you think!