Accidental Beginnings
Chapter 9
Ororo lay in her bed staring out into the dark emptiness of her room. She'd just lost the love of her life all over again. Remy was finally out of her life for good. They both had the closure they needed to move forward. That fact didn't make it hurt any less. He was the first man besides her father that she'd loved. He'd quite possibly be the only one she'd ever be in love with.
It all seemed so unfair the way their lives had played out. And from where she stood there was no turning back. She knew his son was an innocent in the situation but it didn't change the fact that he was the flesh and blood reminder of the hurt she'd gone through. Looking into his small face at Jean's wedding brought back feelings she'd thought she'd been rid of. The years after the divorce she'd felt inadequate. She wasn't capable of taking care of her husband's needs; he'd looked for it somewhere else. What did the love they shared have to do with that fact? He'd broken his promise.
Firm knocks on the door made Ororo's heart to flutter with the anticipation. Most of the thoughts she'd just had all but vanished and only one remained…that it could be Remy. She jumped from her bed and went to the door just as another round of knocking began.
"Who is it?" she asked.
"It's Henry. Is everything all right, Ororo?" he asked through the door?
Ororo let disappointment creep into her mind. She'd completely forgotten about Hank.
She opened the door, "I'm so sorry, Henry. I really did mean to call you back. I just forgot."
"Well, I thought something was wrong. You screamed…I was worried," he admitted. "And you didn't answer when I tried to call you back."
"I'm so, so sorry. I went to a movie with Devin and I forgot to turn the volume back on." Hank nodded. She used that time to quickly think of an explanation for her earlier actions. "A cat. A cat on the terrace frightened me," she fibbed. Hank arched a bushy brow. "I don't really like cats…their eyes…," she continued. It was one of those things that she hoped sounded so ridiculous that it had to be true.
"Ah…I see," Hank said. "Well, you did say you wanted to talk. I'm here," he smiled trying to keep his nervousness as to what she'd want to talk about from showing on his face. He did come over with the intent of checking on her but what she'd possibly want to talk about nagged him along with his concern for her.
"What?" she asked looking at him genuinely confused. They're conversation had been completely forgotten after Remy's appearance.
"Oh…yes…," she remembered. Ororo was in no condition to talk to Hank now. She needed to think but now was as good of time as any since she'd already made one life altering decision this evening. "Um…come in," she said as she stepped to one side. As Hank passed through the doorway her she couldn't help comparing his bulking form and the amount of space he occupied to that of Remy's slight build. "Have a seat."
Hank's smile was grim as he sat and looked up at her.
"Would you like something to drink?" she asked.
"No. Come sit, Ororo." She did. "What did you want to talk about?" He asked getting to the point.
Ororo let out a breath of anxiety. She had to tell him the truth. "I'm sorry, Henry."
Whatever it was Ororo was going to say he wasn't expecting that. "Sorry for what?"
Ororo turned and faced him fully and looked into the shining depths of his brown eyes. "I'm afraid I'm not good enough for you, Henry."
Hank's brows shot up in surprise. He definitely hadn't expected her to say that. "What do you mean?"
"I mean…I'm not a good person, Henry," she said as she put her face in her hands and took a deep cleansing breath. She didn't want to look at him. She didn't want to see his face when she finished saying what she was about to say. "I shouldn't have told you that I loved you."
"Oh…," Hank breathed as he sat farther back into the couch utter disappointment creasing his face.
Ororo looked up to see him looking off into the distance. "It's just that, I don't think I was ready to say it."
When Hank looked back at her there was only a slight look of disappointment and with it was one of hope. "You weren't ready to say it?" She shook her head. "Do you think…that maybe one day you will be?"
Ororo exhaled and smiled. He's such a wonderful man. "I don't know. I hope to."
Hank didn't want to lose her. He couldn't believe that this beautiful creature allowed him into her life, allowed him to talk to her, touch her. He was a self described ordinary man. He didn't have a lot of money. He wasn't what people usually called good looking. He wasn't the type of guy that people went out of their way to be around. She was quite possibly the only thing extraordinary about him. If she needed time he'd give her all she'd need.
"I'm afraid that I rushed things a bit in our relationship. We can just slow down a bit…take it slow."
"No, it's not that you're rushing me. It's just that…you know I've been married before…," she said.
"I do."
"It didn't end well. And…I guess my heart is still broken," she confessed as she took one of his beefy hands in hers. "I care about you deeply but I don't want to lead you on, Henry. My heart may never fully heal."
Her words hurt him but it was a risk he was willing to take. "Ororo, you are aware of how I feel about you. If you're willing, I want to be the one to help you heal. I want to be with you."
"I don't want to waste your time."
"Don't think me foolish, I understand everything you've said, Ororo. I'm an adult and this is a chance I'm willing to take."
Ororo nodded her head slowly. She'd let Remy disrupt her life. He'd turned it upside down and now he was gone. There was no reason why she shouldn't try to pick up where she'd left off before Jean's wedding. She was with Hank, a wonderful, brilliant man that was willing to give her all that she wanted and more. "All right."
Remy had reached the bottom of his third drink but was nowhere near drunk. His mind was in too much of a wreck to allow the liquor to penetrate. He knew it was a long shot that he'd walk away a victor this weekend but he'd still hoped. Now it seems that all hope is lost. Etienne would not be compromised. Tonight he was going to drink his troubles away then tomorrow go home and move on with his life.
He'd stepped into the closest bar he could find after getting out of the cab back to his hotel. It wasn't until he was completely inside that he realized that it was a strip club. The place was clean enough not to be considered a dive but dirty enough not to be considered classy. It didn't matter. They sold liquor. That's all he cared about at that moment.
After finding a table in a corner it hadn't taken long for a scantily clad waitress, about an hour past her prime to take his order. Bourbon. Straight.
He'd watched girl after girl take to the stage. He'd bedded prettier girls on a slow night in New Orleans. And without fail each girl would make a bee-line for him after their performance, asking if he'd like a private dance among other things which he'd politely declined.
He was tired of the show, if one could call it that. There was no imagination and not particularly entertaining. The women would be down to their thongs less than a minute into whatever song was playing. But he guessed that what the men lining the stage wanted to see…tits and ass.
Remy had seen enough and was about to pay his tab when the DJ announced "Mystique" next to the stage. She was about two shades too light of the mocha complexion he coveted. Her hair was obviously weaved waist length platinum hair. Light eye contacts. He snorted a laugh. She was too skinny. Her skin struggled to stretch across her implants. She looked ridiculous. She'd probably be a pretty girl without all the extras.
Remy wondered if she or her boss had seen Ororo on the street and tried to copy her flawless beauty. Of course they failed. Ororo was natural. And Perfect. And not his anymore. He ordered another drink and waited…
"Hi, handsome, how about a dance," Mystique said. At first she thought he hadn't heard her over the music however he nodded and stood much to her surprise. He'd rejected all the other girls but her boss made each ask. This guy was dressed in fine clothes…not like the usual businessmen in their off the rack suits. Whoever got this one was sure to make some good cash tonight. "Follow me," she smiled brightly as she took his hand and led him to the back of the club. She grinned smugly at the other girls as she passed.
"Right through here," she gestured to the last door of the narrow hall. Remy stepped through and looked around. Only a vinyl bench sofa and a table furnished the dim 10 by 10 room.
Mystique flipped a switch and the music from the DJ booth came blaring through a speaker somewhere in the room and colors began to dance from floor to ceiling.
Remy turned and sat. He knew the routine. He downed the drink and sat it on the small table and waited for the barely dressed copy. She straddled him and began rubbing her glittered body against him.
"You can touch me," she said into his ear.
"I thought there was no touching allowed."
She took his hands and placed them firmly on her gold lamé covered ass. "You, sir, can touch anything you want."
"Hmm…for how much?" he asked as he looked into her artificial blue eyes. They all usually had a price.
"For someone as fine as you, I'd do it for free. But my boss would want his money. So fifty for anything over the clothes…a hundred for anything under," she said as she ground herself harder into his groin.
Remy groaned. God, how he hated himself. Pathetic.
"How about if I give you a hundred now then you meet me later." He dug his fingers into the firm cheeks of her ass.
Mystique laughed, "No way. I don't care how pretty you are. You could be crazy."
Remy moved his right hand and skimmed the brown skin of her arm before he placed it on her thigh, "I could be but I'm not. You can give your boss the cut of his hundred then you can keep the grand for yourself."
The dancer's eyes stretched wide. Remy could see the brown of her true eye color around the contacts.
Mystique stopped grinding long enough to worry her full bottom lip in contemplation. "You got some kind of freaky shit in mind? Cause I don't like that. You ain't gonna hit me or nothing," she said.
"Non," he said as he lifted his hand again and fingered the synthetic lock of white hair, "I just want to make love to you, ma petit."
Ororo pushed thoughts of Remy out of her mind as she focused fully on Hank. She sat straddling him on her bed feathering kisses over his bare chest. She was determined to once again move on with her life; this last week was just a speed bump. Hank loved her; he'd proved that tonight. There was no reason why she shouldn't try to love him back. She couldn't continue to hang on to the past.
Her slim fingers glided over Hank's flesh through the dense sweater of hair to his shoulders. She leaned over a whisper away from his lips, "Thank you for loving me," she said as she placed a gentle kiss on his lips. With that kiss she changed her focus. She was done with the past. Her future lay before her.
Remy lay naked in his hotel bed. Mystique, who he later learned was actually Raven, had long gone. Not because he wanted her to leave but he was glad she had. Last night hadn't come close to the memories he had of Ororo no matter how tight he shut his eyes and wanted it to be her, it wasn't. Raven had actually told him that she had to get home so she wouldn't be too tired to go to church. He smiled as he remembered the thought. He supposed everyone needed their redemption. It was time for him to do something about his own.
It was time to move on with his life. Ororo had made that decision for them and it was clear. What he'd done was irreparable and he honestly didn't want it repaired. He loved his son and that was that. He wasn't going to deny his own flesh and blood for her or anyone else. It was a new day and he could finally tell himself he was done.
