Behold, chapter nine and stuff. Review or I will eat your liver. BWAHAHA! Cough cough
"Yes! You're going to do an activity! Won't that be fun?"
"What?" asked Naruto, cleverly pretending not to have heard.
"We're going to do an activity!"
"A what?"
"Activity!"
"I can't hear you! Believe it!"
"ACTIVITY!
"Speak up!"
"GET OUT THERE OR I WILL EAT YOUR SOUL!" snarled the counselor foaming at the mouth. Everyone ran. The counselor skipped out before the cowering group. "Now, first we're going to do some hopscotch! And then sewing! And then we'll finish up with some karaoke, and then you'll all eat a pound of lard so that you'll be tender and juicy when I eat you!"
"What was that last one?" asked Mika as the group backed away.
"Karaoke?"
"Scatter!" someone yelled. Everyone ran off in different directions. The counselor tried to run after all of them at once, succeeding only in running into a building. The group eventually met up again behind the cabins, after a few misturns in which Gaara ran into the lake and had to be rescued from the dolphins.
"That woman's finally gone crazy!"snapped Sasuke.
"Yeah, even I have to agree, as I'm not too eager to get my flesh eaten." said Neji.
"We really have to get out of here." said Sakura.
"If you'd just let me kill the counselor..." Muttered Gaara.
"I don't think you could do that without holy water and lots of garlic." said Mika. "We need escape plans. Anyone?"
"Plans? We don't need plans! We're ninjas! Believe it! We can use our super awesome ninja skills to sneak out of here!" said Naruto.
"Hey yeah, you're right! For once." Said Sasuke. "I'll just use my awesome ninja skills to climb, unseen, over these ten foot walls!" He disappeared.
"Umm, I'm just gonna go way over here now." said Mika casually walking off. A few moments later they heard Sasuke's victorious yell.
"Woo! I did it! I'm on top of the wall! Yeah! I'm so awesome. Wait, why are those red lights flashing? Is that an alarm going off? Agh spikes! Agh, falling! Agh, steak sauce! Wait, why am I being sprayed with steak sauce? Agh, attack dogs!" Sasuke ran around the corner, a pack of angry dobermans on his heels. There was another 'Everyone runs for their life screaming until someone finally figures out the obvious and climbs onto a roof' scene which I'm afraid was deleted because of budget problems.
"Well, that was a dismal failure." said Neji, edging away from Sasuke who still smelled like steak night at an all you can eat buffet.
"Well, you did save me from the vicious dogs!"said Tenten, flinging her arms around him.
"Yeah, by throwing me into their path then running off with her!" snapped Sasuke.
"Mika, how did you know to get out of the way?" demanded Kabuto, whop had had a close run in with one of the dogs.
"I'm from the future!"
"No you're not."
"Well, really, as the author's own character, I'm basically immune from harm in a humorous fic like this. Everyone else can get torn to shreds, and that's okay because they'll be fine again next chapter, but not me! Also I sneak into the author's house and read the chapters she's working on when she isn't looking." (Hey you! Stop breaking the fourth wall!) Mika looked up. "Sorry!"
"Hey, who was that?" asked Sasuke, looking up. (For all intents and purposes, I am your god! I control your very fate Bow before me! Bwahahaha!) "So it's your fault I got doused in steak sauce and attacked by dogs?" (Errrmmmm, kinda, sorta, not really, no! Yeah, I'll just be leaving now.) "Oh no you don't muttered Sasuke running off. (Hey, what are you doing here? How did you get past security? Hey, get out of here! Pay no attention to the author behind the curtain! Oh, it's you. Hey, get back there, you're supposed to be in the fic! Hey, what are you doing with that? Here now, put it down, let's be reasonable. No need to get violent, it'll be very messy. Eeep! Watch where you're swinging that! Come on now, surely we can talk this out? I can make whatever you want to happen you know. Ah, that got your attention. So then, yeah? Uh huh, I can do that. Sure. Now get back out there.) Sasuke came back, a satisfied expression on his face. Sakura leaped on top of him.
"Oh Sasuke, you've been gone so long I have the urge to passionately make out with you!"
"Umm, yes. Now, while they're, uh, busy, anyone got any ideas to get us out of here?" asked Mika.
"Oooh oooh oooh me me me!" yelled Kankuro jumping up and down and waving his hand in the air. "I'll use my awesome kitty powers to scale the walls and summon my feline brethren!"
"Next."
"I'll become my super alter ego Super Fox Hokage Man and bring the counselor to justice!"
"Next."
"We all run and hide because my byakugan sees her coming this way?"
"Aghhhhhh, everyone run around and panic before the scary lady eats you!" And so there was much running and panicking which eventually resulted everyone locking themselves into the supply closet for the night.
