Jenna laid silently in her bed, staring out the window at the trees. She was completely inconsolable. Even a visit from Lassiter and Chief Vick couldn't cheer her up. In fact, it just made her retreat further into her shell. Their visit had been a reminder that she would never be able to grow up and live her dream. That she would never grow up, period.
Because in a matter of months, she would be lowered into the ground forever.
She pulled the covers up to her ears and rolled on her side, facing away from Jules and Shawn. She thought about those fleeting months of happiness, when she could pretend that they were really her parents and that they were a family. But in a real family, neither her nor Juliet would have cancer. Now, all she wanted was her real mother. She wanted her to come back and hold her and make everything better.
"Jenna..." Jules touched her shoulder lightly, and she recoiled slightly at the touch. It was childish, but she resented Jules the tiniest bit. Because she wasn't dying. Jules hadn't been given a death sentence. But Jenna had.
Jules slowly brought back her hand. She wished that Jenna would talk to her. After that moment in the closet, Jenna had become distant and lethargic. Almost catatonic. Jules flet like she was slowly slipping away, and that if the cancer didn't claim her first, the state she was currently in would.
Either way, she would lose the girl she had come to think of as her daughter.
Ever since she was a little girl, she'd imagined what her life would be like. As a five year old, she'd imagined that she'd become a teacher, and then one day a prince would come and swoop her off her feet, and they would ride off towards his castle on his snow white horse.
When she was twelve, she was certain that she wanted to be an actress. She'd star in all the blockbusters, make millions per year and live in a huge house by the shore. She'd marry someone no one had ever heard of, and they'd adopt a bunch of kids from Uganda or Somalia or something.
It wasn't until she was 18 that she realized what she truly wanted to do with her life. It wasn't until she was 18 that she decided to go into law enforcement. She'd graduate from the academy in Miami, and then go on to become a detective, and eventually maybe even chief. Somewhere in there, she'd meet the perfect guy, and they'd settle down and have kids. She wanted at least one daughter and one son, Amelia and Matthew, and they would be the center of her world.
But life isn't always what we plan, and sometimes things turn out the exact opposite way we wanted.
Weeks passed, and Jules felt as if the weight of the world was resting on her shoulders as she watched Jenna get sicker and sicker. By the time Jenna's birthday came around, she no longer had any energy to do anything, and she wasn't able to digest certain foods.
Jules kept up a vigil beside Jenna's bed, day and night. She left only to shower and eat, and then she was right back by Jenna's side. She held her hand, read to her, told her stories- anything Jenna wanted, she got.
But both Shawn and Juliet could see that Jenna was slipping fast. They knew they only had a matter of days left with her. Maybe a week, if they were really lucky. The doctors knew, too, and had advised them to start saying their goodbyes.
Jules had broken down when she'd heard them say that. She knew she would have had to eventually, but hearing it made it real. Her daughter was going to die, and there was nothing she could do but watch.
Jenna slowly clawed her way into consiousness, and Jules was at her side in an instant, taking her freezing hand into her own larger one. It took a second, but Jenna focused her sight on Juliet's face. Jules's hands fluttered over her helplessly, then settled for stroking her head.
"Hey, baby. How're you feeling?" Jenna closed her eyes again, and that was answer enough for Jules. They stayed like that for a while, Jenna resting while Jules stroked her hair.
"Do you think they keep track of time in Heaven?" Jenna asked softly, opening her eyes again. Jules's breath caught in her throat, and she had to swallow a few times before she could answer.
"I-I don't... I don't know, Jenna." Her words came out scrambled, her eyes bright with tears. Jenna sqeezed her hand feebly, then smiled up at Juliet.
"I hope they dont, Mommy. I don't want... I don't want to know how long it'll be... 'til I see you again." And slowly, oh so slowly, she released Juliet's hand as her own dropped lifelessly to the bed.
And Juliet buried her face into the sheets and sobbed as she heard the steady whine of Jenna's heart monitor.
Everything was white. White roses and white chairs and a white tombstone. A white casket in which a little girl with skin as white as a sheet was lying, dressed in a beautiful white dress.
Shawn stood next to Juliet, staring silently at the tiny casket. There shouldn't even be such a thing as a child's casket. They simply just shouldn't exist. He stared at his daughter, plea-bargaining with God for just one more hour, one more minute.
Jules leaned heavily on his arm, her left hand clenched tightly in a fist. No matter what anyone did, they weren't able to get her to open her hand. Tears cascaded freely down her cheeks as she stared at the little girl who shouldn't have died so soon. She was barely fourteen years old.
She tuned everyone and everything out and focused only on the still form of Jenna's body. She didn't move, didn't react as they closed the casket slowly lowered it into the hole that had been dug.
A strong gust of wind blew through the cemetary, and as Jules lifted her face to the skies, she opened her fist. Out tumbled a handful of white rose petals. Shawn and Juliet watched as they got caught in the wind and were carried up and away.
Up to Jenna.
