A/N: Hewoo! Here is Chap. 9 and one chapter away from the finale! Anyhow, please enjoy it, with the "oh so many flashbacks" ^_^, and R*R. As always, thanks to all who read this ficcie and pls. read my other fic too.
PS: KAGERU'S PAST IS NOT SO PRETTY! And that explains the rating below due to curses, the blood and gore and other events, but they're not so harsh though.^_^ Anyway, please enjoy, review and in case of any questions, my *real* email address is NOW open for you guys (I hate em passwords, I often forget them ^_^).
Dedication: All of the reviewers, I'm SUPER sorry for the long wait. I hope you'll enjoy this. I've spent months cooking up some ideas. Anyway, this fic is all fer you. Special dedication: to my onesan, my best email friend. Happy reading! And please be nice, this is my first ficcie and I'm not a professional wrtier.
Those in BOLD ITALIC are in Kageru's POV and he's narrating his past. The rest are all normal so Ja'ne. (For real this time…)
*Wishful Thinking of Hope *
Dark Strider
Rating: R
Chapter 9:
The reason why…
(Kageru's Story, Kageru's Scar)
Takeru dashed away to follow Patamon. SeraKibou decided that he and Hikari should find the others, for they might get in trouble. When Takeru realized that his friends were here, he decided that he should prioritize his friends' safety too. He agreed with this, and in the Master's Bedroom was the last time SeraKibou and Hikari saw Takeru.
Now where could Patamon be? Takeru thought.
He ran up the trail before him, and only God knows where this will lead him to…to salvation or death…
Patamon did his best to keep up with Kageru, yet he darted way too fast from his view.
As if he has a super charged motor inside of him! Is he human? Patamon thought.
Then suddenly, Patamon felt a gush of wind collide with him and he was shaken away from his path and soared haplessly away. SONA!
Well whatever that was, it sure wants Patamon out of the way…
Takeru stumbled weakly. "Where the hell could he be? Is there a subway down here?"
Then he sat down some steps for a rest. I have to catch up with Kageru, he's gotta pay for what he has done to Hikari, what he has done to my friends…along with those three other guys…
For a while though Takeru started thinking. I wonder, what made Kageru so evil to do this I mean, I'm angry, ONLY angry, at him but I don't exactly HATE him as how I hate Devimon. He fooled Hikari, but he did not do harm to her, although he nearly did that, yet I still don't feel a pang of hatred towards him in which I wonder why since there SHOULD be hatred within me for him. But why is it that…why is Kageru so motivated to do something this mean? Surely he didn't start his life as a cold, sly guy. I mean, he's gotta have kindness, purity and compassion. But there's gotta be something that turned him away from the light, I wonder what… or who it could be?
Takeru felt his mouth yawn. Hell, why do I feel like sleeping all of a sudden? I've gotta get up…I've gotta…
Yet the strange tiredness took over him, and he fell asleep by the staircase…
*The house rattled with joy…and a crying sound of a new born infant.
Everyone was laughing and dancing.It was evident at the look on the mother's face was radiant joy, as she cradled a baby in swaddling clothes.A grey eyed child drew closer to her and drew the infant close,
playing with his dainty fists…Taikujouji Kageru was born…
Takeru found himself in a strange area, the whole place was inky black and there was not even a ground to step on, it felt more like an oblivion.
"HELLOOOO!!!!" Takeru shouted, as his voice echoed back at him.
What is this place anyway? Takeru's mind shivered, somehow this place haunted him.
"Welcome, young Master of Hope." A strange man appeared before him. He had long blonde hair, cold blue eyes and pale complexion; he was rather slim and tall and he was clad in a white robe. On one hand held a candle and the other bore a scroll. He flashed a smile.
"Uhm-May I ask who are you and what the hell am I doing here?" Takeru asked.
"Hmm…I'm here to answer what you were thinking of a while earlier. About Taikujouji Kageru's past." The blonde said simply.
"Yet why now of all times and what good will that bring me?" Takeru sighed.
"So that you will know who is your TRUE enemy, and that Kageru needs your help…"
"What help from me?" Takeru gasped.
"I told you: Kageru is not your true enemy. Even though his past form is mi-I mean your enemy, I'd say you MUST forget about that childish brawl of the past. After all, even if Kageru is the God of Despair and you're the opposing force that is Hope…hell like whatever, you two will not be enemies if one, none of you will do a plan of opposition and two, if you two will help each other who knows, Hope and Despair can be best of friends (no matter how stupid THAT sounds)." The blonde said.
"Well as long as he doesn't attack anyone of us, we can *still* be friends. But why does he need my help?" Takeru frowned.
"Let me start with the basic story that formed what Kageru is now. You see, in the past, Kageru is an empty shell: disliking noise, hates laughter and definitely closing himself from the world and friends. Living like that is hard, but to him it's heaven." The blonde said…
Eight years ago…
I stood alone at home, watching from my window my niichan Yusuke and his friends play and I was filled with a certain emptiness and uncertainty. I've always wanted to be alone, yet why do I feel so lonely. Is it not the consequence of closing yourself from the light, from the outside? I sighed as I drew the curtain away leaving my room, my shell dark and cold. Friends, hell who needs them? All I need is myself, not anyone not even Yusuke…right?
All I ever wanted was true happiness, yet I don't know what to look for to gain this. I feel so alone, helpless and cold. Their laughter pierces my soul and their games always made me burn. I had no friends, no playmates not even companions. Hellhole, you say? To me this is paradise…or I thought so because it's so quiet, way too quiet…
"Oh, that's hard. But did he somehow manage to get over that slum?" Takeru asked.
"Well yes he did. And all thanks to a certain person who lit up his life…his niichan...
I rarely commit errors at home, since I'm always at my room reading or sleeping and I rarely come out probably only to eat and go to school.
But when I was seven, I found myself in big trouble: I broke niichan's favorite toy- a fire truck out of wood. Though cheap, it was his favorite because of the siren's sounds.
"How could you?!" He shouted at me. "You know this is my favorite toy and you know that!"
"Like I mean it." I snapped at him.
"You didn't, oh let me think," he mocked me. "Is it because you just want me to be as miserable as you are? Oh please, you're just a hell of a dork that is afraid of the sun you vampire!"
Something within me boiled-I knew I snapped yet I tempered my actions.
"That's just a toy!" I argued. "I can buy you a new one like that!"
"Oh yeah!" Yusuke glared. "Where's your money?"
"Uh…" I fell speechless.
"Hah! I knew you wouldn't want to use your money for me! No wonder they're gathering dust already." He laughed.
Well no matter how quiet I could be, I do loose patience for I am HUMAN. I pounced at him, my fists clenched.
Caught unaware, Yusuke fell down. Angrily, he wrestled me down and I struggled against him. Yet of course he proved to be stronger being three years older than me. Finally I felt tired and managed to struggle away.
"I win!" He laughed at me.
"Fine then laugh, what the hell do I care?!" I shouted.
"And when did you ever care nerd?" Yusuke shot back.
"Go ahead tease me goddamn it! You can even kill me! Go ahead, I'll even get the knife for you!" I somehow felt a burning pain within me and gone was my careful choice of words.
He stopped laughing and gave me a stern look. "And what will I get if I'd do that?"
"Well now you can avenge that stupid toy of yours!" I felt something hot slide down my cheek-tears.
"But…"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'BUT'???!!! WHAT ARE YOU HESISTATING FOR??!!!" I cried. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CARE? WHAT THE HELL DOES THE WORLD CARE IF I DIE? YEAH YOU'D PROBABLY EVEN THROW A FESTIVAL, MARK THIS AS THE HAPPIEST DAY EVER IF I DIE!I ONLY WANNA BE ALONE! LEAVE ME ALONE!!! YOU GUYS DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT ME! I HATE THIS DAMN HELLHOLE!" I was panting, then I caught a look on Yusuke's face: he was terrified, a tear was forcing its way down his cheek. But I didn't see anything else because I rushed to my room the door came to a close with a loud BANG!
I sat down my bed, cradling my favorite stuff toy: a teddy bear I named Chocolate. Niichan gave it to me during my birthday when I was two years old according to Mom. Somehow I managed to remember him handing me a box which held Chocolate. I thought about tearing him down after that fight but then again it was way too precious to me that I just cried on it.
Then I heard my door creak slowly yet I didn't look up, the fight between niichan and I hurt me deeply. Does he really care for that stuff toy more than me? I really didn't mean to break it, yet he was so mad at me and was accusing me of meaning what I did. I cried I realized that THIS world of mine is the HELLHOLE, I'm avoiding what is paradise: friends, playmates, mom, and niichan.
I cradled Chocolate while sobbing; never looking up until I heard a soft voice "I brought you some cookies just in case you get hungry." My head reluctantly looked up. "Niichan."
Niichan rarely visited me, in fact he never did. I was rather surprised.
He sat beside me and I looked away. After a long pause, I said softly. "Gomenasai."
He looked at me, and I was crying. "I really didn't mean to break your toy engine. I knew you loved that toy very much. I didn't mean what I said earlier too, though I think you wouldn't even care…anyway…"
Then I felt his hand on my shoulder. "What are you saying? Of course someone cares for you."
"Yeah right." I replied.
"Well that's what you think." He cradled me close. "But there are many who do care for you: mom does…and me."
"Make me laugh." I said.
"No seriously. I'm sorry about what happened too." He smiled.
After another pause, I shyly asked. "Can we be friends?"
"You mean 'Can we be friends again?'" He laughed. "I'm always your friend. And if you'll only try to open up to others, they'll be your friends too. How about joining us later at the playground for tag?"
I replied in affirmative and for the first time in my life, I smiled…
"OK, so that was a pretty bad fight. I never had something like that between my and my niichan." Takeru pointed out.
"Lucky you. Anyway, the rest of the happenings are unimportant. But may I ask you a question?" the blonde turned to Takeru.
"Shoot it."
"Whenever your brother gets a date, did you ever feel that he is better having a certain person around?"
"Me? I'd never think of that. I know my niichan knows how to choose, and I know he always makes the right choice. And plus, it's my niichan's happiness that matters." Takeru said sincerely.
"For one thing, you and Kageru have the same answer if I ask this question. But unfortunately his niichan fell in love with the wrong girl…and it saddened Kageru, and it saddened AND angered him even more when he realized that his niichan was being played with by the girl he loves. Kageru was planning revenge…Yusuke realizes the truth…and it cost Kageru his dear life…
Four years ago…
I was eleven by then when I met Silvia. She's pretty and popular though not so smart and is a pain. I don't even know what my niichan saw in this stupid lady, no I mean bitch. She doesn't even care for him since she always ask for money from him, ask him to do almost all her homework yet he doesn't complain and would usually make reasons for her to me. Maybe it's because he loved her too much to loose her. And I feel awful for him.
But really, I hate her with all I've got! Partly from the fact that she's abusing my niichan's love for her, she would do anything to make my life miserable like doing several things for her, even half or more of my allowance goes to her! Yet if niichan likes her, I respect his decision, and because of this I never told him anything. Yet to be frank, I have another girl in mind for him.
Sumire is beautiful mixed with brains and manners. She has a firm foundation in life and is well-known not to mention respected. She is one of niichan's childhood friends. Though I wish their feelings for each other were beyond friendship, well too bad.
And here comes a day when I discover something I should've and I nearly died because of it… and also something that I'd never thought was possible…
I was walking down the alley, towards Silvia's house to drop by some books she wanted to borrow from niichan. When I came by the door to ring the doorbell, I heard voices that made me stop.
"How much did you get?" It was Silvia's voice.
"Erm-about ¥ 250, mam."
"What?" A crashing sound echoed throughout the house. I swallowed the lump on my throat.
"Only that much, do you call that piece of shit a masterpiece of hard-work?" Silvia's voice roared.
"Sumimasen, hontoni sumimasen."
"Oh no don't think I'll let you pass with that crap again!"
"Please try to understand us oh please!"
"Tamare! I've had it with your lame excuses. I'm already busy with that guy and here you are making my day worse!"
"But I thought…"
"Hell why would I learn to love that asshole anyway?" Silvia shouted. "All I wanted from him was the money, the fortune and all not because I care for him duh. And I also want that damn kid away. That ototo of his is already suspecting me or something…"
For a minute I didn't get it, then…
She's not reffering Yusuke, is she? Suddenly my blood started to boil. How dare she…how dare she call my niichan like that? After all that he did, she was just using him? No one ever uses my niichan and gets away with it, even if she's a girl.
"Hey Silvia!" I shouted, busting the door down. Silvia faced me, her face plastered with shock and horror. By her side is a young girl in red, taken by surprise and partial gratefulness and relief.
"Ka-kageru. What the hell are you…" Silvia trembled.
"You're gonna be sorry for what you did." I breathed, glaring at her with extreme hatred.
"What the hell are you saying?" Silvia shot back.
"Shut up usotsuki!" I shouted.
"Oh no…KEIGI!" Silvia shouted.
Then a man in black came down. "What is it, 'nesama?"
"Get this kid beaten up and outta here!" she shouted.
"You heard her men." Keigi shouted then other men in black appeared…a hundred against one…
"That girl is a total MANIAC!" Takeru fumed. "If I were Kageru, I'd cut her to pieces!"
"Uhm, care to know what happens next?" the blonde asked.
"DEFINITELY! I've gotta know what'll happen to that Silvia jerk. And what'll happen to Kageru…" Takeru said. "It's getting kinda interesting."
"Well…"
Though they're many, I was a bit better in fighting since I usually see cool moves from my classmates' so called "duels".
Yet Keigi and five men stood firm, and on their hands were sharp blades. From that moment, I knew they were determined to kill me.
"Looks like you're really determined ha?" I asked but my spine was already shaking in fear. It was so unfair; all of them have blades while all I've got are my fists.
"Don't be scared kid, we'll send you to hell in a quicker way." Keigi snarled.
"Who's the one going to hell again, asshole?" I challenged.
Keigi and his men attacked, and blood stained the floor.
Yusuke was looking for me, worried. I was supposed to be home by five and I've been two hours late.
"Kageru!" He called. "Kageru where are you?"
Sumire meet him along the way. "What are you doing out here so late?"
"Kageru is missing, he's not supposed to be out this late!" Yusuke groaned.
"Oh dear," Sumire sounded genuinely worried. "We should look for him, he might be out there somewhere. I'll come along with you then. After all, two are better than one."
"Thanks Sumire." Yusuke flashed a small smile.
And for a mysterious reason, though Yusuke didn't see it because it was a bit dark Sumire blushed.
The pair passed by Silvia's house and they could hear all the groanings and screams. Sumire raised an eyebrow and wondered what was going on, but niichan seemed to recognize my voice…
"That was Kageru screaming…" Yusuke gasped.
"Huh? Why?" Sumire looked at Yusuke who was panic-stricken.
"I don't know, but I'm sure it's his voice!" Yusuke rushed to the door and opened it and before his eyes came a horrifying site…
I was bleeding and weak, with an arm broken and torn and lay limp on my side. Yet Keigi and his men stood, stronger than ever.
Then Keigi lets go of his blade and from his belt rose a terrifying weapon: a gun.
"I only wanted to make you suffer first," he hissed. "But now you die…"
Then a loud BANG rang throughout the room. He had hit me by my leg and I screamed in pain, trying to cover the bleeding hole with my blood spilled shirt. Yet I felt so weak I collapsed, groaning as the crimson on my pants spread away from the wound.
Then the door went open. I heard Sumire's voice scream in horror. I looked up and saw Yusuke and Sumire by the door.
Yusuke looked shocked, his eyes frozen on Keigi and his smoking gun.
"Niichan…" I groaned yet another gunshot erupted and it hit my shoulder. I gasped in pain.
"NOOOO!" Yusuke fell to his knees and tried to help me up, and blood stained his white shirt crimson.
Yusuke gently tore the sleeve of my good arm and nearly screamed when he saw my bones nearly piercing out of my arm and that it went limp on his hand. "What has he done to you?" he whimpered.
"It's just a broken arm, not so bad." I groaned.
"Shut up." He said softly, tearing the long sleeve of his shirt and wrapped the torn cloth around my arm.
"Why are you angry?" I asked.
"Because you're so stupid!" He drew back a sob, cursing under his breath.
"Niichan…" The word escaped my lips.
"What're we gonna do boss?" One of the men questioned Keigi.
Keigi remained silent, watching as Sumire approached me and Yusuke. Yusuke's eyes were hard on Keigi.
"Why are you staring at me like that?" Keigi raised an eyebrow.
"I guess you know why." Yusuke said coldly.
"And what are you going to do about it?" Keigi shot back.
"I'll send you to hell." A navy blue aura surrounded Yusuke and his eyes cold and dull. I figured that he was under a trance or something.
"Yusuke!" Sumire gasped, she can feel it too, the cold feeling that pierced the room. I guess so, because I can feel it.
Why though, I asked myself, why would Yusuke let go of all his senses like this? Yusuke had always things under control, but now…
"What the hell…" Silvia, who seemed to be forgotten, whimpered.
"Ni-niichan d-dame…" I felt weak, I was helpless as my beloved niichan went berserk before me… and then my niichan took a step…and then there were screams…
I forced myself away from Sumire's side. Niichan…
I have to stop him from doing this rampage. Or else he himself might get hurt…
I have to be strong for my niichan, for myself… I have to save him even if it means I have to pay with my life…
"Niichan…" I limped over to him.
"KAGERU!" Sumire gasped as she rushed to me yet I pushed her away. "Sumire please, I have to get him back!" I said. "Trust me." Sumire backed away, with tears on her eyes and nodded.
I turned my attention to my niichan. This time he was looking at me.
That look…it told me that he's really gone out of control…he can, I mean WILL kill anyone…even me.
"Stop this niichan." I stood up. Yet he heard not my words. And he lunged…
Eyes narrowed at his prey…
I stood, my eyes clear of the emotions burning my chest. Then…
WHAM! I smacked to the wall, my brother's hand on my neck. The other formed an energy ball towards me… ready to kill me…
I shut my eyes… I've failed you niichan…
Then here comes a miracle. Seven radiant scrolls surrounded by purple and golden light appeared. They surrounded my brother. He started screaming and holding his head painfully.
Somehow, like an instinct, I placed my hand on his forehead and a bright light shook the area.
Soon I found my niichan in my arms.
I gently stroke his hair and whispered. "Sweet dreams…niichan…" and after that comes darkness…
"Wai-wait a minute! Where the hell did those scroll thingies come from?" Takeru frowned. "Ya know, everything is just getting weirder and weirder."
"Hello, I'm here to teach HISTORY not CHEMISTRY!" the blonde frowned.
"Fine." Takeru rolled his eyes.
"Anyway, those scrolls are special "Divine Objects" that are created from either uhm…it's not your time to know. That part might come on Chemistry lessons." The blonde said.
"So what happened after that?" Takeru asked.
"Er-let's see…"
A white oval? No it looks like a sphere…
Hell it was just a damn light. A light above me, in some white HOSPITAL room.
I forced my head to turn left. My gaze fell on my niichan, who was asleep against my broken left arm all plastered up.
"Niichan?"
Yusuke woke up, his soft blue eyes staring back at me. "Hey kid, you've been asleep for about three days."
"Gomenasia." I said softly.
"No, it's me who's gotta be sorry." He said tenderly.
"Why?" I gazed at him.
"I'm…I'm such a stupid…" He choked down a sob, and buried his head against the pillow by my arm.
"Don't blame yourself. It's not your fault you were deceived. Everyone gets to be fooled, once in a while." I stroke his head for comfort.
"I'm sorry." He said softly, raising his head and gazing at me, holding my hand.
"Me too." I smiled. He grinned. "About Silvia and me, we're through."
"Oh…" I sighed.
"Don't mind it, I'll find a new one soon." He stroke my cheek.
"Yeah, hope so." I laughed.
And true to his promise, he had found one… and that *one*, to my joy, was Sumire… and Sumire was his first true love, and hopefully his last…
A year later, January…
Yusuke was on a trip to enhance the usage of his energy, so that he'll not go mad again whenever he uses it. It pained me to see him go.
"I'll come back, you'll see, and I'll be able to protect you guys and no one will make us part again 'K?" Yusuke smiled softly at me. I nod and smiled for encouragement. Then with his bags packed, he called for his best friend, Chinjou who was with him for the trip and the disappeared aboard a bus down the lane where the sun sets.
Eleven months passed…
My niichan was gone forever, I lost contact of him. In fact, we all lost contact of him. I was scared, I knew it sounded weird but did he forget about me? I pray that he did not.
I grew lonely again, and I was bottled up again in my "shell" that my niichan brought me out of. And then, there were three men. They said "If you join forces with us, we'll give you everything that'll make you feel king."
I thought they can bring my niichan back to me so I agreed.
All the time I was with them, somehow their evil ways made through me and I became cold, sly and cruel.
I met Hikari Yagami, and I loved her. Yet she rejected me, and I knew who she loved: the God of Hope, the Angel of Happiness- Takaishi Takeru.
Yet somehow, I forgot about the Queen of Purity and Light when I met my true queen- Yami.
She was pretty and friendly. We loved each other and we were happy. But those three guys urged me to take revenge: "Play with the light and regain your shattered pride."
I thought of it as good and agreed to this: she had to pay for my shattered pride, and for the pain. Yet when I saw that she was hesitating in front of me, I knew her love for the Angel was stronger than I thought, and after Takeru's sacrifice back then to save her I started thinking…
I've gone way beyond, way far from what my parents and niichan taught me, what they wanted me to be. I've been corrupted by the evils of Glutton, Covet and Lust. I've been evil and I knew there was only one way to redeem my sins: death. I'm not worthy of Yami's love, or my niichan's presence. I was heart broken when I've seen what I've become: a killing machine, and worst of all the three whom I thought will give me back my brother DECIEVED me. Now, I've made my decision: I'll fight with Hope and if I win, I'll be the victorious God of Despair, but if I loose, I might as well fade. Hey, I didn't want to be like this, nor the fact that I've become a devil…
Takeru was dumbfounded. "I can't believe those demons! They tricked Kageru, they knew he wanted his brother back! And they, like possessed him to get to me? Hey, am I right?" Takeru turned to the blonde who nodded.
"It was the three demons. They used Kageru to get to you. They corrupted him with evil in order for you to fight in a duel long forgotten." The blonde bent towards Takeru. "I don't want you to commit the same mistake I did, and that's why I told you these."
Then it hit Takeru. "No, you can't be…"
"Hai, as you've guessed…" the blonde said softly.
"But why didn't you tell me…" Takeru gasped.
"I can't do that, for Despair and I are supposed to be forgotten. Hope and Despair will always fight within the human hearts and that is enough. Deities representing these two values can choose to fight or not, and I made a mistake by choosing to fight. I don't want you to suffer the guilt I did, when I saw the tears in their eyes and the sorrow..." the blonde bit his lip.
"It's OK, no need to know your history." Takeru said soothingly.
"Anyway, you've got to help Kageru. He's begging to have one last duel with you, and please…save him and set him free from the wretched clutches of those three eggheads." The blonde said sternly.
"I'll do it." Takeru said determined. "At first I was mad at him, but after realizing that it was those three who made him evil, I guess he's a good guy. After all, the true him was a friendly funny and a determined guy, guess I can't loose a best friend- to –be like that right?" Takeru winked and he started to fade.
"He's just like you." The blonde smiled. "A faithful friend, a loyal lover, a loving brother, a helpful son. May all the things that I've failed to do in the past be fulfilled through you…love your friends and family with all your heart for yours and their sake…for I've seen already too much tears." The blonde shut his eyes. "I've gone through too much, and I don't want you to go through the same thing." And with that, the blonde Kibou, former Diety of Hope, vanished.*
***
~To my beloved Yami,
Somehow I know I can never see you again, but please grant me this favor. Visit my hometown, the town of Blue Seed in Uranus, and visit the Shrine of the Blue Wolf, where my family usually goes to and light some candles by the altar of the Blue Wolf at the center of the shrine. There, please pray that someday, my dear niichan Yusuke will come back to the town. Even if my eyes can no longer see him, as long as you see him I will be pleased, for through you I know I can see him and he can see me. If you can find him and if you do see him please hold him tight for me and tell him how much I love him, that finally all the pain and waiting will be gone. That I can now be at peace thinking that my beloved brother, my last family has now returned and I, Kageru, the unworthy had been with him, through you one last time.
I beg of you, please find my brother. Since because of him I became human, I became alive and because of him I learned to love you. And somehow I'll know that if you do see him and hold him for me, I'll know because I'll feel…the arms that were around me all those years ago…please my brother, my only big brother that I love him with all my heart…Farewell, and I love you, for the last time…
Yours truly,
Kageru~
***
A/N: SO what do you think? Is it sappy or dull? WAH I'm SUPER grateful for all of your reviews. Plz review this one too. Hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Goodbye!
Any questions are welcome at my email address.
~darkhopemisstress@yahoo.com~
