A/N: so here it is, the hostage chapter. While I got some pretty harsh reviews for doing it, I couldn't help but be delighted with all the reviews! You guys way exceeded my expectations. And Livsmom, thank you so much for your email. It made me feel a lot better. I was feeling pretty low at the moment.
PS sorry this isnt a new chapter. I saw so many ways i could improve this one i just had to delete the original
So yeah. I hate to tell you this guys but I'm holding my story ransom again, this time for 10 reviews. I know this seems a bit excessive, but I got more than that asking for 6 so I know you can do it. Besides, you'll have way more time. I wont be able to update until Tuesday night. 2 papers and 2 finals to go, and I will be all yours, and probably will be updating nightly because I'll have nothing to do better till summer school. And please, this time, no flames for the extortion. It's not nice. If you don't like it, don't review. Simple as that.
So…here is your reward for being so nice to me. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: One morning after I spent the night fighting with my boyfriend i woke up to see him hovering over my bed trying to wake me up. he had a glass of chocolate milk and a copy of the twilight movie with him as an apology. this was enough to make me forgive him. know why? cuz i dont own twilight, so he gave me a the second to next best thing. the first would have been the book but he had already bought me that. i don't own twilight but thanks to a wonderful boyfriend i do own a copy of the movie
The rest of the week passed by in a blur. Lucian had moved into our home and Macy had apparently thought it was necessary to tell him he could share my room. When I had confronted her about it she had merely shrugged innocently and said I had so much room in my closet it only made sense. And besides its not like we would actually be sleeping so it wasn't inappropriate or anything. Inappropriate no, invasive and embarrassing yes. I liked my personal bubble. But God forbid Macy take a little thing like that into account. I knew what she was doing, and it bugged the hell out of me.
I wasn't sure what I thought of Lucian. I knew I liked him. He was so fun to be around and we clicked so well, how could I not? But I wasn't sure I was ready for a complete invasion of my privacy. I didn't even know him that well yet. He could be a burping-the-ABCs, toenail-clipping-in-the-bed, "that's-what-she-said" kind of guy for all I knew. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I guess. Once you get to know the person and like them despite of their flaws, that is. But I just wished I could have gotten to know him and discover those flaws on my own, not have them shoved into my consciousness.
But anyways, it was done now. Lucian had sold his house, with the help of Abraham's many contacts. Being a lawyer did have its perks. I found it amusing how it was always easier to get around the law if you had taken an oath to uphold it. It had been picked up amazingly quickly, too. Apparently some doctor had bought it without even looking at it. Needed to move in hurry, had a big family, couldn't wait, and all that. I wasn't really interested except I was happy that it wasn't going to make our lives more complicated with a long drawn out negotiation.
I had volunteered Aston and myself to help Lucian move out. I of course was doing it out of friendship, but Aston was doing it because he knew that if he didn't, I'd make his life hell. Besides, if he was going to be living with Lucian, Aston better start getting used to being around him and treating him like family. This was good practice for him. I ignored Aston's glares as we had walked about through Lucian's home.
"Wow, " I said. "It's so big." Oh god please don't say that's what she said. If he does, I'm out of here and he is not taking my room, Macy be damned.
He didn't though, much to my relief. Instead he smiled. "Yeah, I guess it is. It was always too big though. I never liked it much."
My face frowned in confusion. "So then..why did you buy it?"
"It was the only one available. The only once that wasn't in the middle of a neighborhood that is."
"But…this place is huge. How could you afford it?"
Lucian had merely smiled and turned away. I supposed he was happier not telling me so I let it go. I guessed he didn't want to tell me and that was fine. If he wasn't comfortable saying then who knew if I would be comfortable hearing?
As we wandered through the rooms, I was lost in thought. If my home reminded me of the Cullen's then I must have been blind. This house was almost exactly like it. Not in every detail of course. A window was missing from one of the walls and the kitchen was on the wrong side. But for the most part, I could feel my old life in here. Lucian and Aston were packing up things; I could hear the rustle of clothing being put into bags. I ignored them as I slowly walked up the stairs. I paused at the second floor and then turned to one of the rooms at the end of the hall. If it were the Cullen's house, this would have been his room. I opened the door and walked in without hesitation. Clearly Lucian wasn't staying in this room; it hadn't been touched in years. A fine layer of dust coated the wooden floor, and i left footprints in it as I made my way to the window. The view was breathtaking. From here I could see the river and vaguely wondered if flooding was ever a problem. Somehow I doubted it. No river would dare over flood here and take away such a pretty view. I don't know how long I stood there, just watching the river but suddenly I heard a voice calling me.
"Bells! Where are you? You were supposed to help me pack, remember?"
Whoops. "Sorry! Coming!" I headed downstairs.
"It's about time" Aston grumbled.
"Sorry. I'm here now though."
Lucian just laughed. "Actually, Bells, this is the last of it. You can help us take it to the car if it makes you feel better."
"Oh," I felt chagrined. "I'm sorry."
Lucian shrugged. "it's not a big deal. I still had help." Aston rolled his eyes and grumbled.
We walked out to the car, loaded the last of things and drove away. I couldn't help looking back in the rearview mirror. The house seemed sad in a way, now that it was empty. It seemed like it was lonely.
I looked over to Lucian. "So are you sad?
"What?"
"To be leaving. Are you sad?"
He grinned and grabbed my hand. "Nah Bells. I'm anything but sad."
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EPOV
"We're here! We're here!" Alice squealed happily, jumping up and down in her seat.
I rolled my eyes. I loved my sister, but for the life of me I couldn't understand why she was so excited about a new house. We'd already been to so many.
Jasper smiled and ruffled Alice's hair, a look of love in his eyes. Given that image, I couldn't help but think that were I in his place and Bella was in Alice's, I would have been more than happy to indulge her excitement.
Mira sat quietly, seeming unsure about her first new home. I nudged her. "Cheer up," I whispered. "It wont be so bad in a few days. You might even like the new school."
She smiled weakly, nodded, and got out of the car. I followed but while she immediately headed inside, I paused and leaned against the car, taking the whole view in. It was nice, I had to give Carlisle that. In a way it reminded me of the old Forks house. Where I used to stay with Bella. Knock it off a voice whispered in my head. You can't keep thinking like that. You might not be able to get over her but the rest of the family needs to, and that won't happen if you keep pouting like the damn Romeo you wish you were! I winced. It would have been nice to be Romeo. At least he had died knowing Juliet still loved him.
See that's exactly the kind of thinking you promised you'd stay away from. Stop it and get your butt inside and start trying to be happy.
I sighed, shaking my head but agreed. I headed to the house, trying my best to stop wallowing.
I walked in, and the scent hit me vaguely. With my thoughts so focused on my lost love I wouldn't have put it past myself to begin imagining things. I started up the stairs, heading towards the only room that apparently hadn't already been claimed. It was in the same place as my room in Forks. I opened the door and the scent hit me full force. Freesias. This wasn't my imagination. There was no way. I looked around, and noticed the footprints along the dusty floor.
Bella?
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BPOV
I loved the weekend. Especially when it was sunny. I could wander outside, my skin sparkling, and not have to feel guilty that I was missing school. As much as I hated the damn place, I was still a teenager in a way and the rules were that teenagers had to go to school. Charlie had forever left his mark on my way of thinking.
I wandered through the woods, merely enjoying being by myself without obligations. I must have walked for hours, steadily at a human pace. It didn't hurt when I crashed into the trees, but I felt so irritated with myself I rarely took advantage of the powers I had been granted as a vampire. Not that they did me much good. In so many ways I still felt human. Suddenly I came across a clearing and actually gasped in awe. The grass…the flowers... the way the fluff and leaves danced in the wind…it was beautiful. I moved forward unable to help myself, stopping when I was in the middle of the clearing.
I sat down slowly, entranced with the view. Without meaning to, I slowly laid down, shutting my eyes against the sun and relaxing. As a rare indulgence I allowed myself to remember another clearing, a million years ago.
I reached the edge of the pool of light and stepped through the last fringe of ferns into the loveliest place I had ever seen. The sun was directly overhead, filling the circle with a haze of buttery sunshine. I halfway turned , wanting to share this with him, but he wasn't behind me where I thought he'd be. I spun around, searching for him with sudden alarm. (A/N: yes that is taken from twilight. don't sue me please.)
"Bella!" I heard Lucian's voice and opened my eyes, sitting up.
"Lucian!" I said, feeling strangely annoyed to be interrupted yet happy that I had been. "What are you doing here?"
He waited until he was near enough to sit down next to me. "I followed your scent," he said sheepishly. "I'm sorry. It was probably rude, but I needed to talk to you. When I knew you were going to be alone, away from anyone hearing, I kinda jumped at the chance."
I hesitated, not sure I was liking where this was going, but what else could I do except ask? " Well, we're alone now. What is it?"
He hesitated, strangely not as confident as he usually was. Then a look of fierce determination came into his eyes, and he suddenly brought his face close to mine and cupped my cheek gently, our noses almost touching. "Here's the thing…" he began slowly, as his thumb traced my cheekbone, almost feather-soft in the lightness. I merely waited, praying this wasn't happening. "Ever since we met, I haven't been able to get you out of my thoughts. When you're not around, I can't help but obsess as to what you're doing. When you're with me, I feel like singing. I want to wrap you in my arms and never let you go. Bella, I have never met someone like you before, but I think that's because there is no one like you. You completely and utterly captivate me. And I don't want to be the only one feeling like that."
I sat there stupidly, unsure just how to handle this. Lucian saw my hesitation and moved forward, not quite touching my lips but close enough that I could feel the cold that radiated from his lips. If I even tried to adjust my position they would touch, and he would be kissing me. I didn't know how I would react to that.
He took my uncertainty as not a complete rejection and moved in slowly, his eyes pleading for permission. It'll be ok, I thought wildly to myself. It's just one kiss and I care about him and he's so nice and…NO! I couldn't do this yet. At the last moment I turned my head and his lips hit my cheek.
We both sat there, still as statues for a few moments. Finally I pulled back, unable to look in his eyes. I'm so sorry, Lucian," I whispered, staring at the ground. "I just can't. I'm not ready."
He sighed and pulled away, staring at the ground the way I was. "It's fine Bella. I understand. I should have known better than to rush things." He seemed to be battling some internal demon. How I longed to help him. But I couldn't. Not with what had just happened. We sat in silence for almost 5 minutes, him lost in his thoughts and me feeling wretched for hurting him. Finally he turned to me, a small smile playing on his lips. "Still friends?"
I smiled back at him, grateful that he didn't hate me. "Of course, Lucian," I said. I faltered. "I'm not saying it won't ever happen. I just need time. I care about you, I really do. I've been happier than I've been in years, and it's all because I've met you. You've helped me begin to heal." i looked at him, my eyes pleading. "I just need to fully recover before I do anything. It wouldn't be fair to either of us."
Lucian nodded, his eyes tender. "I understand, Bella. If I need to wait, I can wait." He got to his feet and held a hand out to me. I took it and let him pull me up alongside him. He was still too close for comfort, but his grasp on my wrist held me in place.
"I promise I won't make a big deal about this" he said, looking into my eyes. "As long as you need time, I will give it to you. But you should know, I will always be waiting. Until then, however, just know that I want you to be happy, with or without me."
I took a deep breath, steadying myself. "Thank you," I told him as I finally backed away. "I really appreciate it."
He grinned. "So, still friends?"
"How could you even ask that? Of course. Even if I didn't want to how could I not be your friend when you're being so understanding?"
"We have time, Bells," he answered with a smile. "Still like me enough to walk back with me?"
I merely nodded, happy that he as taking it so well. He took my hand, not in a romantic way at all. Just two friends sharing an unspoken connection. We left the clearing and started making our way back home.
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True to his word, Lucian did not make things awkward. We easily slipped back into our friendly roles without even a moment's pause. We laughed, we joked, and we teased all weekend. It was like the almost kiss had never happened.
Except it had. I didn't know what to think about it except that I didn't want to think about it. Lucian seemed truly ok with that though. The entire weekend I never once felt pressured, didn't feel like he was trying to dazzle me, and there were no awkward pauses.
All weekend things felt like they were great. Lucian and I were great. It wasn't his fault Monday brought reality back, and my world came crashing down about me. Lucian played no part in that.
Lucian had decided to drive me to school as usual. He was waiting for me at the curbside. I ran towards him, stupidly deciding to head through the lawn as a shortcut. The ground slipped from underneath me and I fell to the grass with a muffled "oof." And suddenly I was covered in mud. Of course it had to rain last night I thought resentfully, glaring at the sky.
"Bella!" I heard him exclaim as he walked towards me. I could hear the laughter in his voice that he was trying desperately to smother. For the hundredth time I was thankful I couldn't blush. This was humiliating. "Are you ok?"
"Nothing hurt but my pride," I grimaced as he helped me up. I looked to my legs. "Aw hell," I said. "I need to change. You go on. I'll just run to school."
"You sure Bells?" He looked concerned. "I can always wait."
I shook my head. "No, I don't want you to be late. Besides, I might even beat you there." He snorted. " Right Bella. If you say so."
I laughed. "Just go. Wait!" I called, remembering something. He turned back. "Remember! No speeding! I don't want you trying to beat me there if it means doing something stupid."
He rolled his eyes and chuckled but listened, heading back to his bike. "See you at school." and continued to the bike. We had made an agreement. Lucian had made me a promise he wouldn't speed unless it was on a backroad and no one was around. I didn't originally understand why he agreed but given our conversation in the meadow, I now had a pretty good idea.
I went back to the house and changed into a clean pair of jeans. Friggin hell, could I not go one day without making an ass out of myself? My thoughts were chagrined. Even as a vampire I couldn't seem to stay upright. I wanted a refund.
I dashed back out the door and ran to school. When I really put my mind to it I managed not to run into all the trees in the way (not all but certainly some). Poor trees. I really was sorry. But the moment my mind had anything else on it, I was floundering. You know the expression can't walk and chew gum at the same time? Yeah, that's me. Always has been, always will be.
I finally made it to school, slowing down at the edge of the parking lot. I walked at a normal speed towards the main building. I didn't see Lucian there. Either I was right and I had beat him or cheated and was already in class. I'd have to ask him about that.
That's when I heard a voice I had prayed I wouldn't have to hear for at least another 70 years.
"Alice, shut up. You're making her nervous."
I looked up and saw him. It really was him. Not just some hallucination my mind had conjured up.
Edward.
He was standing there, holding some girl's hand and glaring at Alice. Alice? Oh god, I had missed her. But she left you too an angry voice hissed in my head. None of them ever cared. But Edward was the only one who promised not to leave, remember? They might have found you amusing, but he's still the one who lied to you.
I wanted to run. I wanted to run away, disappear, and never come back. I wanted to run up and smack him and the girl who's hand he was holding. And then another part of me just wanted to fall to the ground and weep. But I couldn't. For a second I couldn't even move. I could not lift one single muscle to do anything. Then I snapped out of it and steeled myself. I would not let him have such an effect on me. He would not have that kind of power over me. I had spent all these years refusing to run and I would be damned if I started now. So I did the only thing I could do. I started walking.
I headed towards him, keeping my eyes trained on his face the entire time. I must have been fifty feet away when he finally looked up and saw me. His eyes went wide with shock.
I didn't stop, I just kept walking towards him, and he just stood there motionless, his face frozen into stunned disbelief. I don't know if and how anyone else was reacting; I wasn't paying attention. All I was looking at were his eyes. I stared into them, showing him exactly what I thought of him being here, in my hometown. I poured everything I felt about him into my gaze, not once bothering to blink. He didn't want me? Fine. But he would not be allowed to think that I had forgotten everything he had told me.
I continued to look at him, never once breaking the stare. Whatever happened now, I would not back down from Edward fucking Cullen. When I was about 15 feet from him I ever so slightly adjusted the angle of my trajectory, walking to the school doors he stood in front of. I held his stare the whole time, even when I was within an inch of his shoulder and had to turn my head to keep looking at him. After I passed I let my gaze slide away to the girl he was with. I looked at her for a moment, raised my eyebrow, and continued.
"Bella?" I heard Alice whisper. I looked towards her and bared my teeth slightly, a low growl coming softly from my chest. She would not come near me. She would not dare. She stopped moving towards me immediately and I looked away, continued to the doors, and stepped inside. Not once during the whole episode had my stride changed. I had walked smoothly across the parking lot, looked Edward straight in the eye, growled at Alice and headed inside. Not once did I falter. Just like the way I had always prayed I wouldn't.
Maybe God loved me after all.
A/N: so..hit or miss? Remember, 10 reviews and I will update Tuesday night, I really hope you guys do. Cuz I have such a great idea for the next chapter. So yeah. I hope I get the reviews. Who knows, if I get enough, maybe ill even break down and find a way to post tomorrow night. It all depends on you guys. So yeah. That was the new story. I really hope you guys like it.
Kisses!
