Author's Note- This chapter may include the sudden urge to stone me- please don't.

I was particularly thrilled by the feedback I got from chapter eight. The in depth reviews of some were very motivating and validating. So I thank you guys, I honestly appreciate every ounce of support, though, those who know me on this site know that I am notorious to be a feedback/ constructive critic whore. The only true moral I play by on this site is that if you have something to say about someones writing, do so respectfully and honestly. I accept flames, only on an honorable level. I don't take lightly to cowardice remarks against me as an author, not that it sincerely insults me, I just won't take you seriously.

Okay, rant over. Just felt like the need to put that out there- None of the followers to this story have done this, because each and every one of you readers and reviewers are beyond amazing! It's just a basic overview of how I feel towards what I've seen on this site as a whole. Not just to me, but towards other authors as well. We write for ourselves, privledging others with what we share- decent or not- in hopes of gaining more potential to a future in writing. At least, that's my opinion as to why this site was created.

Early update, because I love you guys so much! Enjoy this chapter!


Sometimes, things aren't always what they crack up to be…

Chapter 9- True Colors

Derek lay sprawled across his bed, arms tucked behind his head as he stared at nothing in particular- the off white ceiling to his bedroom, but he didn't seem to see it. Instead he was running through a script in his mind while simultaneously debating how to approach the matter at hand.

Chloe, I'm really sorry. I didn't know-

Look, what I said was out of line, but-

I'm sorry that I'm such an insensitive-

Why didn't you ever tell me about your mom? This is your fault-

I shouldn't have assumed that-

Every attempt either sounded forced, too sympathetic, or just plain pathetic. Bottom line, they didn't fit him. He wasn't the kind of guy who liked to own up to his mistakes- not that anyone was willing to do so- but something like this was huge. What he had said- it would have been better if he had just slapped Chloe across the face.

Not to say that Chloe's motives to staying on the dance team were right. In fact, they weren't normal. They weren't even healthy. Chloe was ridden guilty upon her mother's death. Derek could see that. To carry on, to cope, and to feel as if she had some sort of connection with her mother, Chloe forced herself into something that didn't fit who she was at all.

Nonetheless, Derek was in the wrong. He had been too quick to jump Chloe's imperfection, afraid that he would lose whatever respect he had gained of her over the past three weeks, that he dealt Chloe the one thing she was trying to keep bottled up to herself. The horrible and inexplicable fact that her mother was gone.

At this point, Derek wouldn't be surprised if she never wanted to see his face again.

Derek sighed. He pulled his arm free from the back of his neck and shuffled through his pocket, returning with a small slip of paper.

Chloe's number.

All he had to do was punch in the digits, rush his apology before she could hang up and pray that she would be rational and fair, or even the slightest of forgiving. He couldn't stand the idea of hurting Chloe on such an emotional level like he had. It was bad enough that she had to live without a maternal figure without him throwing back at her face.

He wanted to start over. He wanted Chloe to understand- what? What exactly did he want Chloe to understand?

That she never strayed from his thoughts, not even for a second? That each time she touched him- even the lightest brush- sent his insides into hysterical fits? That he had been afraid that she wasn't everything he had gathered her to be? Sweet, smart, caring, different, and ever so innocent, let alone the fact that she didn't shy away from him.

That somewhere in his conscience- buried deep below reason and legitimacy- he wanted something to come of their time together?

Considering the talk focused on Chloe, Derek could presume that she was used to the attention she was given because of her naivety. Granted, it was transparent how uncomfortable this recognition from her peers made her, how she seemed to be known to turn down several advances. Like Ramon, and that boy Ramon had mentioned on Derek's first day. Not to mention Liam. Derek could imagine others eying Chloe the way Liam did, as if Chloe were a prize, a catch, but surely not to the same degree.

Knowing Chloe's eligibility among the male population of their school caused Derek to crumple the piece of paper in his hands with burning hostility. If she could maneuver her way out of all that- reasoned by her being categorized as un-datable- than why would she even give Derek a second glance? Especially if he were to profess that he-

Did he like her?

As a partner? Absolutely, after all, she was easy to work and get along with. As a friend? Possibly. Derek could feel them connecting pretty well. He found it fairly easy to talk to her, unless distracted by her.

As more?

His thoughts instantly pushed in a positive direction. There wasn't anyone else like Chloe.

But, the real question was whether or not she felt the same. Did she like him as more than a friend? Hell, did she even think of him as more than a partner? Was she only friendly enough with him because they were stuck together till the end of the semester? Did she feel bad for him?

It was clear to anyone that Derek didn't fit in. Though, against Chloe's knowledge, Derek's solitude was easily explained by his history. On top of that, Chloe was a nice enough person- Derek had come to learn that she may even be too nice for her own good- to act on pity, to sympathize for someone like Derek.

Derek wasn't ready to come to terms about his feelings towards Chloe yet. Everything just seemed so complicated, with too many questions and underlying questions. Besides, he still has yet to make sure Chloe would forgive him before going into something so intricate. What would be the point if Chloe didn't even want to speak to him again?

Inevitably, calling her to apologize was out of the question. He already knew how imbecilic he was going to sound just trying to get a simple 'sorry' out. But calling to do something this important just seemed so cowardly and so high school. If he was going to be honest and true with Chloe, and himself, he was going to beg for mercy- in lack of more dignified words, for Derek was willing to do anything to make Chloe forgive him- to her face.

Additionally, it was only 2:30 in the morning.

With a heavy sigh, Derek rolled onto his side and closed his eyes. He lay there, dispiritedly trying to catch whatever sleep that would grace him at this point, hoping against hope that when he woke, his life would magically be less hectic.


Derek's stride was deliberately slow once making his way to his third our later that morning. He suffocated all second thoughts and urged himself to breathe evenly. Damn, all he was going to do was ask for her forgiveness, while the act seemed to play out as if he were going to ask for something much bigger. Big enough to require that he act like a nervous wreck and worry about Chloe's reaction. Even Simon gave him questioning looks that morning, and they weren't even on talking terms.

Yes, Simon was still deflated about Derek's latest progression with Chloe. Derek never mentioned getting Chloe's number- nor had he spoken of his big mouth moment from the previous day- but Simon's distance kept getting bigger and bigger, his eyes knowing and seeing something Derek couldn't.

Derek was going to have to approach him too. And soon. He did not like the separation they shared over the last couple of weeks, and it was about time to figure out what was the exact cause of it.

Derek turned into the hall that homed Mr. Beck's class. He glanced up, peaking through his drying, dark hair that was now falling into his eyes. He caught Chloe coming from the other direction, her features set as if she were deep in thought.

Now or never. Derek exhaled a shaky breath and pushed a little faster, planning to catch her before she entered the room and he lost his kahunas. She hadn't noticed him at all. Apparently her current trail of mind was deeper than Derek thought, judging by her high pitched yelp and skittish jump once Derek took an uncertain hold of her elbow. She quickly swiveled his way, eyes trained wide to expect someone or something else. Then they narrowed, and her lips tightened into a straight line.

"Geez, Derek. How many heart attacks are you going to try to give me?"

"We should talk," Derek blurted. He was hoping that he could count on whatever spilled out of his mouth between now and the point of Chloe's decision to accept his apology. Her face relaxed from the scrutiny it held before. She didn't smile, but she wasn't glaring at him either. She remained neutral, bottled. Derek didn't like it. He rather her to give him the stink eye instead of look so emotionless. It just wasn't Chloe.

"There's nothing to talk about." Derek rolled his eyes, gently pulling her away from the door and against a row of lockers just before the classroom. He wasn't going to allow her to be difficult. The more this attitude continued, the more Derek felt towards screwing it and ditching the rest of school before Thanksgiving break.

"Yes there is, Chloe. I-"He released her, pulling the same hand to the back of his neck where he rubbed the clammy skin uncomfortably, nervously. He wasn't good at this kind of stuff.

But what if making up with Chloe would be worth it?

"I messed up," he continued, avoiding Chloe's stale blue gaze.

"No you didn't." Derek shot her a disbelieving look, her eyes holding sincerity, like she had actually meant what she said. But how could she say that Derek hadn't messed up? How could she honestly believe that he hadn't said something as hurtful as he had? As if reading the questions in his eyes, Chloe continued.

"What happened yesterday, you were only trying to get me to see the truth. And that's what you did. I've always known of course, but I was in really hard denial about it. And let me just say, admitting your wrong, it sucks."

"Chloe, that's not what I mean. I'm talking about the assumption I made, the jump I took without even knowing about-"

"How do you know now then?" She wasn't accusing him, she was merely curious. Derek was sure she already knew the answer, but she wanted confirmation. It wasn't about catching him as much as it was about catching Rae reveal something so personal.

"Rae wanted me to feel bad about what I said. And it worked. Chloe, I didn't know about your mom and I shouldn't have said what I did. I was wrong." Chloe nodded, first by the verification that Rae had, indeed, told something Chloe liked to keep to herself. Then she nodded as if accepting his apology. Derek breathed a silent sigh of relief.

"I know that you're aware of your wrong, Chloe. You're right, I wanted you to see the truth. But I was too quick to assume anything, I was just-"

"-Afraid that I was the kind of person who was willingly living in denial, lying to myself?"

"Yeah," Derek said slowly, abruptly anxious about the tone Chloe's voice suddenly took when she finished speaking for him. Her eyes held a hint of challenge, as if wanting him to continue to tread in, what now seemed like, deep water.

"What?"

"I just think you're acting a little hypocritical."

"Hypocritical," Derek scoffed. Where had this come from? What was she even talking about? Were they even on the same page anymore? She sighed with exasperation

"Never mind. Just drop it. Let's just forget this whole thing happened." She turned towards the classroom, but Derek once again grabbed her elbow, pulling her back to face him, gaze now suspicious.

"No, Chloe. Enlighten me. How am I being hypocritical? All I said was that I didn't want you lying to yourself. You're better than that."

"And there lies your contradiction, Derek."

"What contradiction?"

"Derek we need to get to class-"

"Don't give me that, Chloe. What are you talking about?"

"T-the bell I-is about to r-ring," She stuttered, her aura suddenly desperate to be out of this situation while she looked to be inwardly flustering on keeping her mouth shut.

"Chloe," Derek demanding, knowing his tone would spark her retaliation. It did. She instantly glared at him, jaw tight, chin jutting out defiantly.

"I'm saying you do the same thing," she started, stepping towards his grasp on her arm. "I can see past you're little guilt fest about the accident you had before you moved here. And yet you're preaching to me like you're better-" she stopped abruptly, eyes widening a fraction as if surprised by how much she let slip past intentions. Stunned, Derek dropped his hand to his side, gaze set on Chloe in disbelief, shock, and-

And anger. Hot, boiling anger that, for a brief second, felt so foreign and alien to him. Then it washed over him, the rage, the disappointment, the guilt, everything that had been slowly dying away over the past month. Because of what though? Chloe? Derek let her shove it all away, only to bring up the incident in Albany that Derek had all but forgot about. Yet, she didn't just bring it up again. She unburied it, and pushed the entire weight back down on his shoulders as if redirecting his personal gravity.

"I'm sorry. That came out wrong, but I-"

"How did you find out," Derek whispered. At first, it was mostly to himself. The better part of his conscience telling him to approach this calmly. His disappointment in Chloe actually knowing tugged against the anger, but it wasn't enough. The inner self hate was overpowering, and it was all Chloe's fault.

"What?"

"Did I stutter," Derek snapped, malice sliding off his tongue. Chloe flinched- the reaction tiny, but there nonetheless- but remained still, hard eyes never leaving his even as he shot a low blow against her own nervous habit. Derek scowled right back, though he struggled to keep his temper in check, the best he could do was stand stiff while he clenched and unclenched his fists at his sides."I asked you how you found out. Because you really had me going, Chloe, for a while now, I thought you were oblivious to my 'accident'"

"Well, I didn't know, but-"

"But what? Did you suddenly have the urge to start sniffing out information about me?"

"Wha-"

"Was it Rae? She sure did make her feelings and dislike towards me pretty clear yesterday. Guess she's been warning you about me for some time now too. Kind of ironic, don't you think," Derek chuckled darkly, with no sign of humor. Chloe opened her mouth again, obviously aiming to question what he was getting at, but Derek continued, wanting so desperately to release his hostile despondency in the girl that stood before him. If manipulation was her flaw, he regretted having tried so hard to discover it. Hell, he regretted having pegged Chloe to be different in the first place.

"You know, that she was really open with me about your mom, obviously something you don't like, while at the same time you're behind my back getting all the inside scoop you can handle about me, huh?

"Derek, what are you even-"

"So, want to fill me in, Chloe? What's the latest story, the juicy details?"

"It wasn't like-"

"God, I hope you got the right rumor, I'd sure hate for you to know the actual truth," Derek pressed. The release, the venting, it felt so good. But the back of his mind was nagging him to stop, to breathe, to listen. He could see why as Chloe's face fell more and more with each of his interruptions. Looking more vulnerable and confused with each passing second. But Derek didn't want to stop, he wanted her to feel bad. He hated Chloe Saunders.

"You won't even let me explain-"

"Explain what, Chloe? That you aren't the person I thought you were? You know, I thought you were different, more open-minded. Obviously I was wrong, but what's really sad is that you turned out to be part of this school's gossip trade, something I really have no respect for. You're just like everyone else, which, I guess that makes me just another idiot who couldn't see you for what you really were."

And there it was. Anything that registered anger or confusion on Chloe's face shattered. Her lips parted as she choked on the air that escaped her lungs, as if someone had punched her in the stomach. Her skin had paled to a ghostly white and tears welled in the corners of her eyes. They had never left his piercing accusatory gaze, not once faltering to his verbal attacks. But they flashed with shock and hurt.

The sound of the bell sent them both crashing back into reality. Derek, beyond angry and betrayed, took a step away from her, the heat of their proximity died away. Chloe had jumped, eyes fluttering as Derek's words stabbed deeper. That conscience pleaded for him to listen, to pick up everything that had just crumbled beneath his disdain- which mostly included Chloe- to fix the mess he had just made. But he blocked it, he pushed his rage against it, suffocating its existence.

Finally, Chloe re-focused, doubling back with that evidently kindled hurt.

"Is that what you really think of me? That I'm just some two-faced, back-stabbing-"

"Chloe," Derek growled. He loomed down on her sudden burst of confidence that wavered in the first place. She looked to fragile and emotional to fight and Derek didn't want to hear it.

"You're going to go tell Mr. Beck that you no longer want to be partners with me, that I make you uncomfortable-"

"That's not-"

"You have no choice, Chloe. Because I'm done with you."

The note of finality in Derek's voice hit home. Chloe's entire body slumped in bitter defeat, tears now overflowing the rims of her angry eyes. But, he wouldn't let that budge his final resolve. He was done.

He turned away from her, disgusted and crestfallen, thinking that making an early escape for the much anticipated Thanksgiving break sounded like a brilliant idea, and stormed out of the school.

And yet, he felt more anguished and angry than the day he had entered this horrid school nearly a month before.

Don't hate me. But review... please? :) I'll accept anything I can take whole-heartedly and with respect.