After calming Chloe down, Rae decided to run her a bubble bath. Rae sat on the toilet whilst Chloe soaked under a moutain of bubbles, this scene a familiarity to them both. Chloe shut her eyes, sighing in content. Rae watched Chloe and she had to admit, she did admire her; in a way. Chloe was so beautiful, even now with panda eyes, hair scraggy and ends damp in a messy bun and puffy cheeks; it was no wonder Finn chose her.
Even now, the memory was still vivid in Rae's mind. Two years and one month ago. It was the night after the gang's first rave together, the night Rae met Al for the first time. Chloe, Finn and Rae were sat at their regular table in the cafe, Chloe and Finn sat opposite Rae. Rae remember the exact words, the way Chloe spoke them with such sheer happiness but also so smugly; knowing she'd get a reaction from Rae - and so she did. Rae remembered the way Finn simply stared ahead, huffing and fidgeting as he grew uncomfortable with Rae's saddned stare. Rae then made up an excuse that she had to go as she had a session with Kester, quickly scarpering from the cafe. She couldn't understand why it hurt so much, why it was so painful; she didn't like Finn like that. Sure, he was fit with a body blessed by the Gods - but that didn't mean she liked him as more than a mate. Maybe it was the fact everything was going to change, now Chloe being his other half and not Rae. But Rae couldn't let that happen, as he was her best friend. It had always been them two, Finn and Rae, Rae and Finn; not Rae, Finn and Chloe. "Rae?"
Snapping back to present, Chloe then shouted, "Rae!" Rae, shaking her head as she came back to Chloe, asked, "Wha'?" Chloe giggled before messing about with some bubbles and saying, "Y' keep wanderin'", Rae blushed, "Sorry, just dead tired today", "Y' always tired" Jokingly quipped Chloe in which Rae pulled a face, which Chloe copied and mocked before the girls shared a smile. A silence fell between the girls before Rae then asked, "'Ave y' told Finn?" She saw Chloe tense and looked down at the water, avoiding eye contact as she nodded, Rae then asked, "Wha' did he say?" Chloe sighed, amusement twinkling in her eyes as she looked at Rae and said, "I didn't really give 'im a chance, I kinda just shouted at him and stormed out", Rae couldn't help but laugh and shake her head, "I 'onestly don't know 'ow y' two are still together", Chloe giggled and shrugged before she grew serious and stared ahead, saying as if she were thinking out loud, "Y'know, I ask myself that everyday".
A moment passed before Chloe asked, "Rae, can I ask y' a question?" Rae nodded, Chloe continued, "D'you think he loves me?" Rae then sarcastically quipped, "Course he does, wouldn't be with y' for two years if he didn't. D'ya really think he'd put up with y' this long if he didn't love y'!" Chloe playfully gasped and flicked bath water at Rae, "Cheeky bitch!" The pair shared a laugh before Rae turned serious, "Nah, but seriously. He does love y' and I know he can be a grumpy sod but he adores y', Chlo. He may not show it all the time but he does, trust me", Chloe bit her lip before then looking at Rae, dead-pan serious, "I think I need to get out", Rae frowned, "Why?" "Me arse has gone numb", And with that, the girls fell to bits with laughter. But through the laughter both the girls couldn't help but wander back to thoughts of Finn.
Finn Patrick Nelson, a born and raised Stamfordian (As Chop called it). He was good-looking, a handsome face with a boyish charm, sharp jawline and a cheeky smile - well when he wasn't pouting. He was all moody and deep, one of those dickheads you saw writing poetry at the back of a coffee shop. Finn stood at exactly 5ft8, he played football four times a week and was lean, with faint abs and a 'snail-trail' tracing his torso. His style was very grunge and laid-back, wearing oversized baggy, short-sleeved t-shirts with the sleeves rolled up topped with the plaid shirts tied around the waist. He, like Archie and Chop, was a brunette. His hair wasn't like Chop's style wise but more like Archie's, his hair was short and straight with a little wave and kink - his fringe slighter longer than the rest of his hair. His eyes were a pretty little chocolate brown, surrounded by a few freckles that crowded the bridge of his nose; but anyone barely ever saw his eyes as they were always wandering. Before Chloe, the gang had never seen Finn with a girlfriend, always alone. Well, not alone, alone - just girlfriend alone. Even through school, Finn never cared for girls. It often made the boys question whether Finn was gay, well the piercing on his left ear lobe and the poetry writing never helped. It wasn't that Al or any other of the lads in the group despised Finn, they just never took a proper liking to him, just tolerated him – apart from Chop. Well then again, Chop liked everyone.
Finn was in his final year at college doing a lawyers course, lived in his own flat and worked as a mechanic in Chop's uncle's garage. He liked living alone, although he loved his friends, Chloe and family; you couldn't beat being alone. Especially of a night, usually most people hate being alone of a night as it's a time where you can ruin yourself by over thinking too much. But Finn liked it, not only because he could do what he want but he could let his deepest and darkest thoughts creep out and be put on paper.
Finn loved to write – mainly poetry. He originally wanted to write songs and become a musician to get a few shags, but after trying to learn the guitar and giving up after the first week; he turned to poetry. He never showed anyone his poetry as:
A.) They would laugh at him.
B.) They weren't good enough.
Now although both everyone and even Finn himself, thought he were thick. He was actually quite clever, he had gotten all A*s to Bs on his GCSEs – well apart from one in Performing Arts. He got a fail in drama as all he did was piss ball about in it, he only took it because a girl he fancied took it and he wanted to impress her.
Tonight, Chop and Izzy decided to throw a house party round at Chop's - which Finn begrudingly agreed to go to. It must have been gone past nine as it was pitch black outside, stars twinkled and danced throughout the inky coloured sky. It was a cold night and as Finn walked to the local off-license to get some beer, his breath came out in a little cloud before him. Finn got a six-pack of Carling for himself as he didn't want to drink the cheap shite Chop usually bought. As Finn began the journey to Chop's, thoughts of Chloe entered his mind.
His chest tightened at the thought of the situation Chloe was in, she'd been through the mill that girl. He couldn't help but feel a wave of sadness, unable to imagine how she was feeling. He wanted to call after her but she was out the door before he could even find the words to shout after her. Another wave of sadness washed over him at the news Chloe laid on him, now, Finn wasn't going to lie; he had imagined having kids with Chloe. Sure, it may haven't have been right this minute but if Chloe were to fall pregnant now; he wouldn't argue if she wanted to keep it.
Finn could be broody wanted he to be, sure, he could be a moody sod when he wanted and he could stand his ground if he ever found himself cornered; but whenever he'd so much as even see a pair of baby booties in his town centre; he'd fall to bits. He had to admit, he got a little teary at the thought of unable to have kids of his own with her - and the thought of adoption or surrogacy just didn't appeal to Finn; if he was going to have kids then they'd have to be his and Chloe's. He couldn't help but wander some days at what they'd look like, Chloe's eyes and maybe his nose; God help if they inheriated his eyebrows. He already made up in his mind that Rae and Chop would be his choice of the Godparents, couldn't see anybody see - despite Chop being completely hopeless, Rae would surely take charge.
Finn hadn't realised how much he'd been thinking when he realised, he was now across the road from the street where Chop lived. Finn wished with everything in him that Rae or Chloe weren't there tonight, he just couldn't deal with the bollocking.
Chloe cringed as she heard a glass being smashed somewhere throughout the house, poor Chop. He was going to have some shit to deal with tomorrow. The party was in full swing, a tight squeeze but the tightness of the meshing bodies made the party that bit cooler - the more the merrier. Chloe was stood at the doorway that connected the living room and hallway, watching everyone whilst drinking a alchopop, not really one for dancing - especially with how she was feeling. She felt as if she was being judged by every guy in the room, thinking they were secretly laughing at her. Her sleeveless and exposed arms felt a little more buldgy than usual, her playsuit felt tight around her tummy and her legs felt chubbier than ever.
"Alright", Some lad, a cute geek, breathed in her ear - a little too close for comfort. She gave a small and tight-lipped smile, not wanting a chit-chat. He then leaned in, once again, "Can I get you a drink or anything?" She then shook her head and shook her drink a little in front of his face and leaned into his ear as she said, "No ta, got one", She cursed the music for being so loud, not wanting to get so close to him to talk - she'd rather be an arm's length away. It then grew awkward, the pair looked around to try and find something to talk about. He adjusted his glasses, the type that looked fake and girls wore to be "Hipster", before then leaning in again, "I'm David, what's your name?" "Chloe", He then said with a shy smile, "Chloe? That's nice name", She gave a bashful smile, it not quite reaching her eyes, "Thanks", He then smiled at her, but his eyes looked a bit more nastier than his smile - not a bullying nasty but a lustful and hungry kind of nasty.
Finn watched David and Chloe as he sat on a couch, sharing a joint with Archie - who sat on the arm of the couch. Finn passed the joint over to Archie and took a swig from his can of Carling, not taking his glare off Chloe and David, making a slight dent in the can as his fingers clutched it a little - not liking the closeness of David and Chloe. Now, Finn wasn't jealous as Finn never got jealous - well so he claimed - but David had a rep - not a nice one.
"So, d'ya wanna go somewhere a bit more quiet?" David asked Chloe, in which she shook her head and said, "I'm fine 'ere, thanks", David then laughed a little, a wicked tone that flipped Chloe's stomach, "No, I don't think you heard me", Chloe felt his hand clamp onto her wrist tightly, which caused her to wince, "I said, d'ya wanna go somewhere a bit more quiet?" He spoke through a clenched smile. Not giving Suzie enough time to reply, he attempted to kiss her in which she pushed him away.
That was it.
David was in front of Chloe one minute, the next he was ripped away and thrown across the hallway; landing onto his back and onto the floor with a thud. As soon as David had made a move on Chloe, Finn had bolted to his feet and rugby tackled David to the ground. Finn was now straddling David on the floor. Finn picked David up by the scruff of his T-shirt and gave him a mean right hook to the jaw, causing David's head to smack against the wooden floor beneath them. Once everyone had realised what was going on, they'd all gathered in the hallway. Some poking out the doorway that connected the living room to the hallway, the other that connected the kitchen to the hallway, some in the actual hallway and some on the staircase - others peaking over heads to see what was going on. Even the music had cut out by now.
"Don't y' ever and I mean ever fucking touch 'er again or I will fucking curl y' up, do ya understand!?" Finn bellowed in David's face, landing another punch on David's jaw. Compared to Finn, David had not an ounce of muscle on him - meaning he had no chance. Finn then rose to his feet, "Get up and fight, y' fucking cunt!" He screamed at David, booting him in the ribs - causing David to curl up and cough as he clutched his stomach. "Is it because I'm not girl, ay!? Is it!? Y' spineless little prick!" Phwack! Another kick to the ribs.
Chloe and Izzy were at the front of the crowd - screaming at Finn to get off as they watched in horror. Chloe then choked out a "Finn", And he turned to look at her and his pupils were now two black slits as his eyes came into contact with hers - she knew he was at the precipice of anger at the moment, if he went any further he would do maximum damage to David. Rae, Archie, Johnny, Al and Chop pushed their way through the crowds and joined the two girls, in which Rae screamed, "Finn, wha' y' doin'!?" She then looked at the boys and smacked Chop across the head, "Don't just stand there, dick'ed. Do summat!" The lads shared a look before Chop dived for Finn and yanked him off David, looping his arms through Finn's and locking them behind Finn's back - despite Finn's kicks and screams to get at David. Chop then called over a furious Finn, "Oi, take 'im to get cleaned up whilst I sort this knob out", Archie nodded, picked David up off the floor and took him through the crowd and up to the bathroom.
Al then turned to everyone, who still stared in horror, "Alright, y' had y' show now piss off and someone get that music back on!" Despite a few moans and grumbles, everyone went back to their partying and the music went back on. Chop then, slowly and cautiously, let go of Finn and asked, "Y'alright now, fella?" Finn then nodded and fixed himself a little, fire still in his eyes. As everyone departed, Finn went to walk into the kitchen to grab another beer when he froze; as Chloe was stood in front of him and she was not at all happy, "Wha' the fuck was tha' all about!?" She shouted in his ear over the music, he then curled his lip at her, "That!? Wha' about tha' little scene tha' went on with David before!?" She rolled her eyes and snapped back, "Tha', was none of y' business!" He glowered, how ungrateful could she be? "None of my business? Kinda is considering y' me girlfriend!" She scoffed, "Whatever", "Y'know what? Next time I won't even bother, be no skin off my nose when he takes y' into the toilets and rapes y'" She went to bite back when he pushed past her and into the kitchen.
She watched the back of his head disappear into the sea of people, she was furious. What a fucking prick, she didn't ask for his help; she was dealing with David perfectly well on her own. Despite Finn being her boyfriend, she didn't need him nosing in her business or mollycoddling her like that. She was a big girl and could handle things perfectly well on her own.
Finn was now in the kitchen, drinking beer and frowning as he stared forward. His hand throbbed in pain and he winced, looking down at his reddening, swollen and bruised knuckles - luckily not cut. It had been a couple of hours since he saw David or Chloe, hearing word from a drunken Chop that David had been chucked out. He glanced at the clock that hung on the wall above the fridge, reading that it was 3:49 in the morning. Judging by the sudden drop in people in the kitchen, he guessed the rest of the house wasn't much different and everyone was starting to leave - finally.
He scanned the remaining people in the kitchen, no one standing out - he'd never met any of these people in his life and he was pretty sure Chop hadn't either.
"Hi", He heard breathe in his ear, he turned his head slightly to see a pretty - well pretty of sorts - little blonde. Tits in your face and a killer smile. She flicked one side of her hair over her shoulder and then said, "What's your name?" He looked at her, gave her a glance over and left for the living room - he wasn't in the mood for tarts with killer legs tonight. He weaved his way in-and-out of the small crowd that gathered in the hallway and popped his head into the living room - where Chop and six others lounged around. Chop was currently in the middle of chopping up and snorting a line. The oh-so irritating song 'Spacemen', Blasted through the speakers. Finn grimaced at the song, God did it get on his tits.
"Oi, Chopper!" Finn called out, but got no response off Chop. After the third attempt, he finally got a head nod and a, "What's up, mate?" Whilst Chop rubbed his nose and widened his eyes. Finn then frowned, "Turn this shit off, man!" He boomed, in refferal to the music. Chop rolled his eyes, "Oh c'mon, mate. S'good tune!" Finn then shook his head, unable to stop the smile spread onto his lips before he then turned back into the hallway and glanced around - still no signs of the rest of the gang. A unsettling feeling nibbled away at Finn's stomach, where was everyone? Where could they possibly have disappeared to now as there was barely anyone around? There must have been no more than forty people around the house now. He would've been happy to even see Archie and hear all about Hercules or some other boring bullshit.
He then saw her, all legs and brown hair. He softened and his shoulders dropped, he was going to have to talk to her eventually. He made his way through to the kitchen and over to her, where she stood; making herself a drink of what was left. She jumped as she turned to see him, "Jesus, Finn", "Listen, Chlo. I've come t'... I've come t' talk t' y'", She took a swig of her drink, not making eye contact as she asked, "Wha' about?" He scoffed, "Don't be like tha', Chloe", She huffed, "Well wha' is there t' talk about? Y' lookin' like a walkin' bruise, me never bein' able t' 'ave kids, or the fact y' made a complete show of me in front of the whole of the party?" He angled his eyebrows in multiple positions as he gave her an innocent look, "All three?" She sighed before giving in and softly saying, "Let's go upstairs".
Rae joined everyone in the living room - passing five passed out partiers; seven if you included Al and Johnny. In the living room, it was just Chop, Izzy and two randomners. Chop decided to whack on his dad's old record player and a slow, chilled out tune played throughout the room.
Chop and Izzy laid on the long couch, his arm dangled loosely around her. The two others were jotted around the room. Rae rested sidewards against the doorframe, one foot crossed behind the other and her arms folded as she scanned everyone. Chop then noticed Rae and smiled lazily, "Raemundo, mate", He spoke in a lazed, sleepily tone. Obviously stoned out of his brains. Rae smiled and nodded, "Yes, Chop?" Chop giggled, yes giggled, "I love you", in which Rae laughed, shook her head, replied with "Love y' too" and then left the living room.
As she walked to the stairs, she saw a random partier curled at the bottom of the stairs, another asleep but sitting up against the front door, another curled up by the radiator, one fast asleep halfway up the stairs and another at the top. Rae stepped carefully over the randomner at the bottom of the staircase, dodged another and then stepped over the person at the top of the stairs – trying not to wake anyone. She went to walk into Chop's bedroom, knowing this house inside out, but then she heard low and harsh whisperings. Letting her nosey side get the better of her, she followed the sounds of the conversation and it led to the guest bedroom.
The door was cracked open slightly, enough to see inside. It were Chloe and Finn, Chloe stood over Finn as he sat on the edge of one side of the bed and stared ahead, the two with their backs to Rae. Rae's brow knitted in confusion as to why the were arguing, that is until Chloe hissed, "So, tha's it? Y' just gonna end it here, as if it meant nothin'?" She snapped lowly, "No, I didn't say tha'. I just said we need to go on a break for a little while", His voice cracked.
Chloe then huffed before whimpering, "But I don't understand I mean, we don't need a break, Finn. We can work this out and I-" "Don't beg, Chlo. Y' and I both know this break will do us good, either that or we split up for good and hate each other", Chloe then whimpered and begged some more, "Please, don't do this, Finn", Finn then snapped, standing his ground, "I've made up me mind, Chlo and tha's tha'", She then scoffed, throwing her hands up, "And don't I get a say!?" He stayed silent, not looking up. Chloe then scoffed, "Y' know wha', Finn? Fuck you", She spat before turning and storming out. Rae then hid in the shadowed and dark corner as Chloe stormed out the room and down the stairs. Rae then counted up to two minutes before she walked in to see Finn still sat on the edge of the bed, his back to her. He rested his elbows on his knees and had his head in hands, he let out a sniff before he pulled at his hair slightly.
Rae moved slightly, cursing silently as a floorboard creaked; causing Finn to sharply turn and coughing as he cleared his voice, "Rae, di... Did y' 'ear tha'?" Rae then nodded in which Finn's face contorted before he whimpered and he sniffed, in which Rae's heart broke before she moved over to him and cooed, "Oh, Finn", She then sat down and pulled him into her arms, and that's when he let himself go. She then tightened her embrace around him as she soothed him, "It's alright, it's gonna be alright".
After cuddling him some more, Rae decided that it was best for the pair to settle down in bed - bed sharing nothing new or unfamiliar to the two, "Y' alright now?" Rae asked timidly, in which he shrugged, "I guess so, well as alright as I can be", A moment passed before Rae then sighed, "Y'know, it is gonna be ok, Finn. I mean, y'll work it out, y' always do", He then shook his head, "Not this time, Rae", She frowned, "Y' love her, don't y'?" It was his turn to frown before he boomed, "'Course! I love 'er to death", "Then why can't it work out? I mean, if y' love y' 'er then y'll work it out", He sighed, "It's a bit more complicated than tha', Rae. I mean, I love 'er. But this time, it's different. It just doesn't feel the same anymore, sure, I love 'er but I'm not 'appy anymore, not like I used t' be", She then sarcastically quipped, "Are y' ever 'appy?" In which he smirked and rolled his eyes, "Oh piss off".
A moment passed before Finn asked, "Did Chloe tell y' she the went the doctor's today?" Rae nodded before she asked, timid with her words, "And how are y' about it?" He shrugged, "Alright, well guess I 'ave t' be", "Least y' don't 'ave to worry about 'avin' kids", He nodded but didn't exactly fully agree with the statement, in which she frowned as she took in his face before she asked, "Y' wanted kids didn't y'?" He nodded, "Well not now, but maybe in like a year or two", "Jesus, Finn! Bit young aren't y'?" He exhaled, "Yeh, now but I dunno I mean it'd be exciting, 'avin' a kid an tha'. Buying clothes for it, changin' it, feedin' it, watchin' it take it's first steps. It'd... I just think it'd be amazin' 'cause like I could raise it my way and do it proper, not like me arl fella, y'know?" A soft smile spilled onto Rae's lips as she watched his eyes lit up as he continued to talk, he didn't look at her but stared ahead as he talked; just like Rae did when talking in the park earlier; he then gushed as he continued, "And I always wonder what it'd look like, whether it'd have my eyes or Chloe's nose", "Let's just 'ope it don't inheriate them bloody eyebrows", Rae joked, in which the pair fell to bits laughing.
Finn watched Rae through his own laughter as her eyes squinted shut with happiness. Finn's eyes trailed down from her eyes, down her lips, passed her chest, her hips and then back up to her face. In that moment, that moment of laughter; he forgot the fact he could never have children with the girl he loved, his dad and every other bit of bullshit in his life; well, he didn't call her his best mate for nothing.
Finn woke up with dry lips, a bitch of a headache and a feel of motion sickness. He needed a shower, a smoke, a cup of tea and a place to think. After he and Rae had their heart-to-heart last night and laid together - a sense of de ja vu from when his nana passed just over a year ago sprang to his mind - Finn decided to creep downstairs and get them two pint glasses, the big bottle of Jack Daniels and left over coke - big mistake. A really big mistake, as it were evident this morning as Finn felt like his brain was now mashed and felt as if it had been scattered across the room.
He blinked a few times, widening his eyes to make sure he was awake and alright enough to get up. Which he was. He sat up, now noticing he was topless as the covers slowly dropped from his upper body and exposed his naked skin. He rubbed his face and yawned quietly, trying to not wake his bed mate. Speaking of her, he looked down at her as she slept - eyes twitching every so often. He smiled to himself like a right idiot, before he turned and scanned the room - it was just them two.
He gave out an inward sigh, absenmindently chewing the inside of his cheek. He glanced over at the daisy and green patterned curtains as sunlight dimly peeked through them. He could hear a lawnmower blaring outside, which meant it was a nice day - much to Finn's displeasure. A hangover and the sun never went well together. Finn then slowly climbed out the bed and crept out the room, giving Rae a quick glance before then wandering to downstairs - dodging and stepping over a few passed out partiers.
Finn made his way straight to the kitchen, painkillers and getting the kettle on the go his main priority. Despite being topless, Finn still had his jeans on - weird. But he shrugged it off and fished out his lighter, filters, pouch of tobacco and his papers. He got out a mug from the cupboard above and flicked the kettle on. As he looked at the back garden through the window above the sink, he did a massive stretch and let out a tired moan. He needed the world to stop spinning and to get his shit together.
As the kettle did it's business, Finn lazily made a rollie. It may have been shit but it'd have to do as he was down to last bits of 'Backie' As he and Chop called it, and he didn't have any money on him to get some from the shop on the walk home. So, he tucked his rollie behind his ear and put his lighter and papers back in his pocket; leaving his tobacco pouch on the kitchen counter as there was barely anything left and no longer useable.
The kettle clicked, bringing Finn's wandering mind back into the room. He made his tea - two sugars and a drop of milk - grabbed his rounded "John Lennon" Sunglasses off the side that he left from last time he was over and left for the back garden where he took a seat at the patio dining set. He placed his mug of tea on the glass table, placed the sunglasses on and lit his rollie. He outstretched his legs whilst he slouched within the chair as he took a drag, the toxins of the rollie releasing all tension in his body; tilting his head back as he exhaled.
He then looked around and noticed how quiet and still the garden was, it must've been not long gone eight as the birds were still in chirpy and cheery form. Considering it was December, it was pretty warm out. Not Ibiza warm, but early September warm - humid with a light breeze.
"Ay up", Croaked Izzy. A smile spilt onto his lips as she took place at the table. A blanket wrapped around her shoulders and a mug of tea cupped between her hands, he could see the material of one of Chop's T-shirt popping up from underneath the blanket. He hadn't realised he'd been thinking for that long, but he must've done if Izzy had come downstairs, made a cup of tea and such, "Ya sleep alright?" He asked, exhaling some smoke. She nodded, eyes still drooping slightly with tiredness, "Yeh, Chop's bed is so comfy and I didn't wanna get out of it. How is it that when you have to get up of a morning your bed becomes comfier than an Angel's wing but when you try to get asleep then it becomes as hard as nails?" He couldn't help but laugh, scrunching his nose as the look on her face set him off even more. Jesus, she only asked a question...
Finn, once dressed and showered, left, not bothering to say goodbye as he wasn't in the mood for talking to anyone. Finn took the long walk home through Rutland fields, picking up a long weed and tearing it apart as he made his way home. He searched through his pocket and pulled out some change, enough for a bag of crisps and a bottle of Tizer. He stopped off at the Woolworth's at Green Lane shops before heading for home, when he froze as he reached his block of flats. His breath caught in the back of his throat as he heard;
"'ello, son".
