[[Again its been a while since the last update….Works been busy and I've started to sort of get a social life lol….only sort of though! Thanks for the reviews guys…means a lot. I've not even thought about it, so I could be complete drabble yet lol. I do know however that its going to be stuff that's happened in the past rather than a follow on chapter if that makes sense? I never normally make sense, so just ignore me]]
Ronnie's whole body tensed. Her stomach threatened to heave as she wondered what would happen if Jack found out. She knew he would shout at her, probably call her all the names under the sun, because she hadn't even told him she was pregnant when they broke up.
She found out that morning, but when she had wanted to go and tell him, let him be the first person to know, she caught him with another women. It was not like it was even the first time he had cheated on her, but she thought he had changed. Obviously not.
Everything seemed to go so quickly over the following few weeks. Ronnie hid away at the Vic. She barely slept and barely ate. All that got her through the dark times, was knowing there was a little baby growing inside her. Her chance to make things right. Her chance to prove that she was always meant to be a mother. Whether she was going to do it alone or not.
Her mind going over and over what she had witness. Her stomach wretched every time she thought about Jack, and that tart of a barmaid. That barmaid, that Ronnie had employed just weeks before. How long had their sordid little affair been going on? The whole time? The third time he had cheated on her, and this time, she wasn't going to give in and take him back. No chance. Neither her heart or head could take it anymore.
Since having her baby taken away when she was just 14, her maternal instincts over powered everything she did. She mothered Roxy. She had to. Their mother had abandoned them both and they had to stay with their father. Not that he was much of a dad. He took her baby away. Then lied when Danielle came back to find her. It was his fault she died. His fault she never got to tell her baby how much she loved her and missed her everyday. His fault that her whole life had turned into a complete mess. But being pregnant again, and her father not around to ruin it, Ronnie knew she would do her very best to bring up this child that was growing inside of her. Even without Jack. He didn't deserve to know.
Two weeks, Jack had been festering in his flat. He didn't open the curtains. He didn't shower daily. He sat drinking alcohol all day every day, and he hadn't shaved, causing a bristly, untidy beard to start forming.
He cursed himself day and night for what he did to Ronnie. He never ever wanted to hurt her. He loved her unconditionally. He had no excuses for what he did, and now he was paying the price. He felt sick to his stomach with guilt. He wanted her back. He wanted everything to have just been a bad dream. To wake up and find her asleep next to him, all scrunched up, with her left hand under her cheek, as she always did. He wanted to hear her laugh at his rubbish jokes. He wanted to cuddle up on the sofa with her, watching rubbish television and eating chips, making funny facial expressions at the fact she loved curry sauce so much.
Just two weeks, and he missed her this much already. His flat was cold and empty, and his heart felt much the same. It ached. Like it could crumble away at any given moment. He knew he could never repair what he had done. Knew she wouldn't take him back. Not again. Staring out of his windows for hours on end, just to get a glimpse of her. But he never did. He knew she wouldn't be socialising. He knew her well enough to know she would hate to be in any public place, around anybody she knew, except Roxy. He knew that, if there was any chance she would see him, then she wouldn't even exit the upstairs of The Queen Vic.
He couldn't keep doing this to her. So many thoughts entered his head. But there was only one thing he could do. He had to move away. Had to go as soon as he could, to give her a chance to get her life back on track after what he had done. It didn't make him feel any better, but he knew it would make things easier for Ronnie.
He packed his suitcase, showered, shaved and put on some decent clothes. He ran the keys to the club over to Max and told him his plan. Max wasn't too keen on the idea, but knew when Jack was like this, there was no reasoning with him. Jack insisted it would just be for a short while. Until the dust settled.
He had intended to stay in contact with Roxy. He wanted to see Amy as much as he could. He had text her to tell her his plans. He wouldn't let his daughter down. He had made that mistake before with Penny.
Exiting his flat with the last of his belongings that he wanted to take with him, Jack stared across at the pub. Time seemed to stand still as he half hoped Ronnie was looking out of the window. It was a stupid thought, but he wished she would stop him from leaving. It was never going to happen though. He knew that. He finished putting his things in his car, and got in himself. His mind was all over the place. A tear escaping as he drove off of the square, thinking about what could have been.
[[Ok, so no speaking in this chapter. Sorry. Bit of a filler chapter to be honest. Please read and review. Any criticism is welcome]]
