Alphonse

Edward was so angry at Xinder but we couldn't blame him for anything that he did. He was desperate just like we had been so long ago; just lonely. He made a mistake… but then again, Ed had the right to be angry too. I think he was more angry at the fact that the Colonel was caught up in this mess, sacrificed for no more of a reason than just 'he was there when it happened'. If Xinder had known that Mustang was going to go into that room, he would have never done the transmutation, I know in my heart of hearts.

Just like Ed would have never done the transmutation we did if he had known it would have taken my body…

"I'm going to talk to him." I said, standing up.

"What for?"

"To smooth over your rant."

"He needed that rant just like Mustang gave me one five years ago! People who are as stupid and me and him need someone to knock a few good words into our brain." He growled, pointing at his head. "If not me, then who?"

"Well Mustang didn't do it right after you did it."

"No but I was still guilty and in a wheelchair at the time with one arm and one leg, looking like a pitiful invalid. He sparked fire into me, the bastard."

"Xinder isn't you, Brother. He's much more sensitive. I'm going to just talk to him."

Edward sighed but didn't say anything else.

I walked to Xinder's hospital room and opened the door, knocking on it a little.

"Can I come in?"

Xinder looked over at me for a second and then turned away.

"Are you going to yell at me too? I've gotten it about three times already."

"No… I figured you would get tired of it…" I walked in and sat in the chair beside the bed. "I just wanted to tell you that I understand. I really do. Why do you think I'm in this armor?"

"Because you wanted it to become a fashion statement, right?"

"No… you were right the first time we met." I took the helmet off and leaned forward a little. For the first time in a while, I had someone who didn't scream at all about that fact. "Do you see that?"

Xinder looked at it and squinted his good eye.

"It's a blood seal."

"Exactly."

"I knew you were empty."

"I know but doing the taboo is not looked highly upon… especially if you failed." Xinder's eyes widened and I stuck my head back on. "We did the taboo as well and that's why I ended up in this body."

"So all that yelling and screaming… He's a hypocrite."

"No, he's upset. We realized after we did it how dumb we were to think it would work for us. As if we were the exception to the rule… just like you. To know someone would be as stupid as us made Brother angry. To know that Mustang was pulled into it (literally) made him even more mad. The fact that you didn't bind his soul… well…"

"Well how the hell was I to know that?!" Xinder yelled, tears falling from one eye. "I wasn't prepared for that at all! I was prepared to sacrifice any part of myself to get my mother back but… I never wanted anyone else involved."

"We understand, Xinder."

"I studied how to make the array, what I needed, and what I knew I was going to use. I knew what I would sacrifice if the time came but… Roy… he… God, why did he have to come back home?! Why couldn't I have been as smart as your brother and bound his soul?!"

I wasn't sure if there was a good enough answer for that. Would it have been better if the Colonel was bound like me or is mercifully just that he wasn't? The answer is not good either way; a catch 22…

"How…" I looked up. "How have you coped? Do you hate him for what he did to you?"

I breathed in. "I could never hate him for what he did because it wasn't his fault. I was in on it too. We both wanted our mother back and we both ended up sacrificing. How it happened my body was my sacrifice, I don't know…"

"Do you regret that Edward pulled back your soul?"

"I can't regret anything because my brother gave me a life. To regret this existence would be to ignore Brother's pain and determination. Brother is smart and surprisingly methodical when he's in a stressful situation. For anyone else, the situation would have ended up just like the Colonel, in regards to a missed opportunity. Of course, I think someone else would have just cried in agony rather than even try to get them back. But Ed somehow thought it all through in just a split second and used the blood seal to bind me.

"You had the right idea, except you didn't have anything to bind the Colonel with. If he had been, he wouldn't have regretted it either. He would have been thankful that you saved his life, soul bound or not."

"But I didn't. I screwed up and he's gone. Completely gone."

"There's nothing you can do about that now, Xinder. True, he's gone and you made a mistake, but you have to move on."

Xinder swallowed hard and turned away from me.

"I'll let you know when I know what that is… Thank you."

"For what?"

"Not yelling at me about how stupid I am."

I smiled, although he couldn't see it.


Xinder

Talking with Alphonse helped a lot. I was really appreciative that he didn't yell at me or tell me that I was stupid. I already knew I made a mistake and the growing amount of people who came to tell me how idiotic I had been overwhelmingly depressing. Knowing that I was the cause of Mustang's death… disappearance… whatever it was, was already weighing on me enough. There had to be a way to get Mustang back… I had so much knowledge from the Gate that was floating around in my head.

I looked down at myself and scoffed, looking away. I was literally half of a person. How was I ever going to do anything with half of a body and half of a blood supply? I'll be weak all my life because I can't produce enough blood for myself…

The door opened and I saw Edward walk in and turned away.

"I don't want to talk to you."

"I'm not coming to yell at you." He said, stopping beside me. "I came to offer a suggestion."

"Like what?"

"You're a mess, in shambles; I get that. I was like that too when we failed. I know what it's like to have the weight of someone else's life on your hands. How do you think I feel when I look at Al every day?" I looked back at him. "He can't eat, drink, feel, cry… He might be grateful but was it merciful of me to do it? I have to think about that every time I see him. But, I know for a fact that I will spend my life looking for a way to get his body back, and I won't give up. You gave up half of your body to get Mustang back and for some reason, there is nothing to show for that. Don't you think that's a little odd?"

"Well… yeah… but I mean, you guys said it before that it's because I didn't bind his soul to something."

"That might be true but Truth doesn't do an equivalent exchange unless something was actually exchanged. You have up half of your body, so where is the equivalent of that?"

I thought about it for a second as Edward leaned on the bed.

"You get it now? The other half of the exchange has to be somewhere, right?"

"Well… yeah…"

"So, you need to pull yourself together and find out what was given back to you."

"Are you saying it could have given a body back?"

"I don't know. I know that my arm was enough of a sacrifice for my brother's soul so… what would be enough for half of your body? Don't you think it's your job now to find out how to get an answer in regards to that?"

I nodded a little but looked down at myself.

"How am I supposed to do that with a body like this?"

"We have a friend who can help with that. She's an automail mechanic and will definitely hook you up with an arm and a leg. I don't know about optics though… it's a little tricky."

"I'd be okay without an eye… Do you really think something came back?"

"You can't sacrifice something for nothing, so there has to be something. What is was is what you need to find out."

I nodded, willing to go to the ends of the earth to find what came back… I had to…

"What do I need to do?"


SOMEWHERE

"Well, aren't you a surprise. I would have never guessed that this is your original form… You're kind of odd though…"

"What do you mean?" I asked, my voice finally being heard.

"You're not like us…"

"Envy, stop scrutinizing him." A sexy voice said from the side.

The both of us looked over as the beauty in the corner glared at us in disgust.

"He's perfect the way he is. Give him a couple of years and we can mold him into something worth using. Besides, no one knows where he went, so they will be so happy when he returns…"

"Who am I?" I asked.

"Well, while you're with us, your name is Pride. But if you go to the outside world, where you will be anyway, your name is Roy Mustang. You're a colonel in the army… and our secret weapon."

Roy Mustang… I looked down at my hands, one a little off colored, as if it weren't mine… Was that my name? Why did I feel like I didn't belong with these people? I felt like I was alone… and the memories…

"Come on, 'Roy', we're going to tell you all about yourself." Envy said, putting his arm around my shoulders.

I walked with him but I didn't like him. I didn't like any of these people…


uh oh, it looks like roy is alive but he's now a homunculus! he is pride but he doesn't seem to like that fact. he's not the same as everyone else though... he's a different sort of homunculus... or is he really a homunculus at all?