Interlude

It had been five days since the other Doctor had left them with the vortex manipulator, and they had yet to go on a single adventure. When she asked her Doctor about it, he mumbled something about needing to thoroughly check it over to ensure it was safe and working properly. They didn't want to be stuck in a perilous situation with no means of escaping it because their equipment was faulty. Rose wasn't buying it though. She knew he could have scanned the bracelet with his sonic screwdriver in three seconds flat. Besides, when had he ever been hesitant to throw caution to the wind when an adventure was on the horizon? She knew there was more going on with him and determined to find out what it was.

Dishing up their supper, she set a plate in front of each of them. The Doctor began to immediately tuck into his food with only a brief smile and "thanks." Rose; however, pushed her plate away, folded her hands in front of her and stared at him.

"What is it then, Doctor?" she began without preamble.

"Hmmm, what?" The Doctor glanced around quickly, hoping to see somewhere in the air around him what she was referring to.

"The vortex manipulator. Why haven't we used it yet? Not even a short hop across the world. And don't give me none of that 'I'm testing it out first.' I can see right through that excuse. So tell me what's really going on, yeah."

The Doctor set his fork down in front of him and leaned back in his chair. Emotions that she hadn't expected to see flicked across his face: pain and sorrow and guilt. Creasing her brow, she leaned towards him. What could be causing him to feel this way? He opened and closed his mouth a few times as if trying to work up the courage to speak. Finally, the words began to tumble out.

"Rose, when I was a Time Lord. A full Time Lord. I never thought much about the dangers of all my travelling. I did it because, well because it was fun. I didn't want to die, but I didn't really think about it much either. But now, I'm human. Only one life, and I could…." His voice trailed off.

She reached across the table for his hand. "So, you're afraid then?"

"No, well yes, actually. But that's not it. That's not the problem. You see, you all, my companions I mean, I took you with me. I … and you, you could have died. Some did die or had their lives ruined, or memories erased. And I kept taking people with me because I needed you. I was a selfish git. As a human, I realize how fragile life is, and I never thought… So, what kind of man does that make me in the end?"

His voice cracked on the final word and a lone tear trickled down his face. Rose stood up and walked around the table to kneel down in front of him. She took both of his hands in hers.

"Doctor, we all chose to go with us. You didn't force any of us."

He grimaced at that. There were a few things he still had not told her about his very long life.

"And even when we saw the danger, knew it completely," she continued, "we still chose that life. I, for one, wouldn't change a single moment of it. Even knowing everything I know. I saw how terrifying the universe is, but I also saw how wonderful and vast it is too. And if I had it all to do again, I would, even knowing I could die. 'Cause I'd rather die like that, than live the life I would have lived had I never met you."

He took a deep breath and looked down at her, his beautiful pink and yellow girl. Her eyes were bright and earnest. She always knew just what to say, and he believed her, knew it was true. She had chosen him a long time ago. Would choose him every time. He couldn't fathom it, but knew it was true. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out the vortex manipulator, turning it over and over in his hands a few times, thinking. Finally, he slipped it on his wrist and grabbed both of her hands.

"Well then Rose Tyler Nobel," he grinned, "where would you like to go first?"

"With you?" she said, returning his smile, "anywhere."