"Mum, I'm so sorry I haven't been here sooner. I should be here every day, I'm sorry I'm not" a soft hand touched his cheek, wiping away the tears the black haired boy was about to spill.
"Shh, it's alright Shun, don't be upset. You're a teenager; you should be out having fun not sitting in hospital. Besides, you never have time to relax. You're always working, trying to better our lives." She paused as she took a few deep breaths, she shouldn't talk this much, breathing was already a struggle. "You deserve to relax, not look after your mother. I should be looking after you."
"But mum, you're ill, I should look after you. The only reason I'm not here as much as I can be is because I'm scared mum. I'm scared that if I'm here something will happen. But I'm also scared that something will happen if I'm not here"
Wiping away his tears she shushed him.
"Calm now Shun, that's what everyone goes through, but I'm going to get better, and I'm going to get home and I can come and watch you in that tournament. How're you doing with it? Are you training? Have you signed in yet?"
"Yeah, I signed in just a few hours ago, and I'm going to start training soon" he answered, smiling softly, trust his mother to turn the conversation to him. He was worried for her, wanted to hear about how she was. He didn't want to talk about a stupid tournament that he was only doing for the money he would gain for his mother.
"That's good, I know you'll do great in the tournament, I have every faith in you to win." His smile grew, he knew he was going to win, he had seen the competition. Had fought against one of them. Had beaten that man quite easily. He was going to win, but hearing that his mum thought that, too, made him all the more determined to win.
"Thanks mum; I'll try and do you proud" a tired smile was his answered, accompanied with a weak voice.
"I know you will" she closed her eyes and rubbed at them, as though trying to wake herself up.
"Mum?" He asked worried for her
"I'm alright Shun, just a little tired, it's just the medicine I'm on to help me get better. It has the side effect of making you tired." She explained to him, brushing a strand of his hair out of his eyes. He nodded at her though he was still concerned for her. Placing his hand on her shoulder he lowered her down onto the bed.
"Alright, mum, I'll leave you to sleep. I can come back later" as he was about to stand to leave his mother, he felt her hand on his wrist.
"No, it's alright Shun, stay for a little while" she insisted, her voice quiet but still holding that strange authority that only a mum could hold. With a small tug on his wrist he sat back down on the chair and watched as his mum closed her eyes.
"Alright mum, I'll stay here for the next couple hours. Or at least till they kick me out." A small smile crossed his face as he saw her features soften as she fell back to sleep. He knew his mum was more comforted when he was there with her. But she also knew that he never felt comfortable in hospitals and would never openly tell him that she preferred to have him there. That fact made him feel unbelievably guilty, but he still could hardly force himself to come. He had almost backed out before he'd even made it to the hospital.
Not wanting to leave her now he had arrived he watched as she breathed softly and evenly. Soft even breathing was usually a normal and good thing. But from his mother it wasn't. Oxygen was being forced up her nose and if, even with that pressure, her breathing was only soft what would she be like off it? He screwed his eyes closed as he tried to block out the thoughts. He didn't want to think about that. Because the truth was, if that oxygen went off she'd be unable to breathe on her own, it'd be impossibly for her to get air into her body. And if the worst should happen, and the oxygen stopped, she'd die.
Staying by her side he blocked out all the negative thoughts that plagued his mind and simply rested his head against the mattress. Closing his eyes he took a deep breath and tried to relax his mind. He needed to relax.
oooo
A shaking on his shoulder he opened his eyes, his vision foggy as he tried to look around.
He squinted at the light that came into his eyes from the corners. But surprisingly not the front of his eyes. Trying to focus his eyes he could see Harry stood before him. Making a questioning noise he pushed back slightly and could see the man more clearly.
"What do you want?" He asked as he pushed himself up slightly.
"You fell asleep" his sleep filled eyes quickly cleared and he shot straight up.
"Why didn't you wake me up?" He asked, his voice rising.
"Shh, she's still asleep" his eyes turned to his mum and saw that she was sleeping softly. He nodded his head slightly and turned to him to allowing him to continue after sensing he wasn't finished "I didn't wake you up because you looked like you needed a bit of a rest. You looked far too stressed when you were awake. You seemed at peace when you were asleep."
Nodding one more time he leaned down and placed a kiss to his mother's cheek.
"Bye mum, I'll see you soon" he whispered to her as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze as not to wake her from her much needed sleep.
"Come on then" Harry told him leading the teen towards the door and opening it for him. Casting his mother a long look he left the room, being practically pushed through the door. "I've never seen it; you don't want to go in now you don't want to come out." Shun just smirked at him, though it was half hearted.
"Yeah, I guess I'm just strange like that" he answered through a sigh slouching slightly as he left. His back stiff from sleeping in an awkward position. Preventing him from standing straight.
"Come on then, I'll take you back home. You need rest. I'll finish everything up with the tournament." Harry assured as he let the boy walk ahead of him. He was slightly worried that he would lose the boy should he walk behind him. He just mumbled something but the words weren't tangible. Harry let it drop though and watched the boy walking, fatigue still evident on him. It seemed he hadn't been sleeping well, from worry? Judging on what he'd just seen that appeared to be most likely.
Following the teen he let his mind wander, he would drop Shun off back at his home and handle the bits of paperwork needed to enter the tournament. The boy deserved his rest.
oooo
The old rusted car pulled up outside Shun's home. The black haired boy didn't say a word as he left the car merely nodding his head at the older man as he drove off. He couldn't explain what was wrong with him, he felt like he was out of his body as he walked towards the building. He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn't even notice that he hadn't thrown his body against the broken door.
He did, however, notice closing it. It was hard not to, he always had to force it closed, and even if his mind was so gone that opening it didn't bother him it wasn't so bad that he could close it just as easily. As soon as the door closed behind him he seemed to awake from his dream like state.
"Oh my God" he sighed to himself as he dropped onto the homemade bed, ignoring the dust that rose from it. It couldn't have been later than five but still, he needed to shut himself off and be away from the world for a while. Grabbing his phone he went to look at the time but apparently he'd forgotten to charge it. "Damn phone, I swear the battery only lasts two days." He grumbled as he dropped it back on the floor, knowing it couldn't do it any harm. Well not too much at least.
Laying back on the bed he crossed his legs and closed his eyes, ignoring the dirt that surrounded him. He knew the dirt had fallen from the ceiling. Upstairs the occupant was more than three times Shun's weight and every time he walked across the floor dust would come down covering everything. Thankfully though, he was out for a large portion of the day so he didn't have to worry too much about being covered in dirt.
Settling down on the bed he curled up and turned on his side laying his arm over his face. With a tired groan he allowed his body to be swept off to sleep.
oooo
His phone rang causing the teen to jolt in his sleep and clasp onto the phone at the exact second his mind awoke from sleep. Faster than his body and making him start slightly. With a groan of annoyance he pulled it to his face.
"Yeah?" He asked, his voice groggy
"Hey Shun" the voice clicked within his mind immediately making him snap up and hold the phone tighter.
"Dan" he answered through gritted teeth, his grip tightening on the phone by the second.
"I wanted to talk for a bit, you busy?" He asked, hope touching the corners of his voice.
"Actually I am" Shun lied, hanging up and dropping back on his bed. Why? Why did he have to call? With a groan of annoyance he turned onto his side and buried his head in the dirt pillow.
oooo
The phone rang once more not ten minutes later. Shun had left his bed just a few minutes prior, and was sitting on a cushion drinking some tea from one of the few teabags he still had. The call from earlier the farthest thing from his mind he answered.
"Hello?"
"Are you still busy?" The voice asked.
"Yes" he lied once more, hanging up not a second later. He groaned once again, why did he call him today? Today of all days, he didn't want to speak to the brunette. Looking at the phone he pressed against the power button watching as the screen went blank. He had a slight paranoia well up in him at the black screen. What if he got a call from the hospital and they couldn't get through because of it being turned off? He was tempted to switch it back on but knew that if it was important then they'd call the neighbour who he had put down as the emergency number. It wasn't worth talking to Dan, he loved his mum more than anything but there were ways she could get into contact with him. However this was the only way Dan could talk to him.
Dropping his phone onto the floor he closed his eyes and rubbed his hands over his face, he didn't know why but it seemed an appropriate reaction. Sighing in annoyance he leaned back on his hands and closed his eyes so he couldn't see anything of the drab flat. Being blocked off from reality, if only for a few moments, did help him to block out the world and be content with where he was.
Opening his eyes, however, brought everything back full force and only ended up making him feel worse. Groaning he pushed himself to his feet.
"If I can't do anything today I might as well go out into the woods. Maybe I can get some training done." He mumbled to himself staring down at the phone. He'd have to take it with him. "I'll take it with me but keep it turned off. I'll only turn it on if I feel paranoid" he negotiated with himself as he grabbed it and stuffed the old mobile in his front pocket.
Not a moment later did he turn off the light and leave his flat. Not bothering to lock it. There was nothing to steal.
please read review
