He led me up the stairs to his room still having one cool arm wrapped around my waist. I inched closer to him once again trying to hide my face in his chest, just being near him comforted me and he soothingly caressed my arm with his hands to calm me.
He led me to one of the smaller rooms, but it seemed bigger than my own house. There was a window covering one side of the wall completely and a king size bed facing the opposite of the window. I was oddly a little messy with books and CD cases all over the floors and walls.
"Wait, I thought you don't sleep." I questioned him.
"Um, it's not mine. I mean, I'm not the who used it. It was……………hers."
"Oh." I mumbled.
Edward continued to stare at me while I assessed the room. At one point he walked past me to sit on the edge of the bed and I followed.
I stared into his golden eyes for a minute before saying, "I'm sorry I can't remember. I'm trying everything I possibly can to give her back to you, but nothing is working-"
His finger silenced me, "Shh. I know you're trying, but she will be back one day. This won't last forever. I love her and I will always love her. Nothing will change the relationship I had with her. Even time can't change us in the least bit."
But the thing was………..I didn't want him to love her………..I wanted him to love me. From the way he talks about her and the way he says her name I don't anyone can change his mind about her. I would just have to try to make him as happy as I possibly could now.
I interrupted his thoughts, "Tell me more about you two. I never did get the whole story."
I knew it would be hard for him to talk about her but he agreed with a sigh, "Be-…………Bella………and I actually met in our biology class together. Then, that same afternoon she seemed to be the target of a dangerous situation and I helped her get out of that mess, but the point is ever since I saw her that first day I had a connection with her. She's nothing like I've ever seen in all my 100 years. She took me as I was. Broken and tormented. I couldn't have asked to have anything better; I don't think I deserve her sometimes, after everything I've done. She definitely brings out the best in me."
I sat there listening to everything he told me about her. Her likes, her dislikes, her favorites. I couldn't help but become more intense during the conversation because he was talking about someone I once was, but shouldn't I feel her somehow.
It went silent after a while when Edward spoke a date with dignity and honor, "August thirteenth."
"What's August thirteenth?"
"That was……………..that was date Bella and I was supposed to get married. I guess that's all over now."
I laid a soothing hand on his shoulder "Edward."
"If she hadn't been in the car with Jacob we could have been planning our wedding right now instead of me staring at a hollow version of her with no emotions, feelings, or thoughts of hers! She was the person I went to when I was upset, when I needed help, when I needed comfort, when I just needed………………her. Now I have nothing. I guess it's what I deserve."
"No Edward! It's not! You deserve to be with her and I'm sorry that I can't fill that position, but you have to realize that she's not coming back!"
He got up away from me and knocked everything on top of his dresser and crushed it into a pile of dust, "NO! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop talking about her like she's dead! You will never be able to fill the place she held in my heart so please don't even try. She was mine. You're not mine."
