I do not own Rurouni Kenshin :-)

Strange Affliction

Chapter 9 – Actuarial Prediction Zero

Kamatari threw his thin cotton scarf on the ground in disgust. All his outfits were fine before he had an agenda, and now everything looked wrong. In the end he opted for a simple tan Ralph Lauren polo, with dark blue jeans. That way his tan leather shoes would look smart and his dark blue cotton scarf would match. Observing his outfit in the mirror he slid his sunglasses on and nodded. He looked casual but neat with a hint of fashionism – the scarf did that for him.

In his head he recited the rules: one - never take your sunglasses off. Two - always listen and three – make sure they issue an invitation to return (do not ask to come back). He had to repeat the last one to drive home the fact that he shouldn't ask if he could come back – that would be cheating.

"Swish Kam – real swish." Whistled Kaoru observing his subdued yet classy style of clothing. "Not loud and proud today?"

"Not today, love, not today." He lowered his sunglasses and winked at her.

"Should I be playing a particular role, or something?" Kaoru thought she'd better clarify.

"Nope. Just talk as much as you want." He shrugged indifferently "this is simply for observation. But that doesn't mean we can't get work done at the same time."

"Keep your pants on."

"Exactly."

"Oh you're hilarious." Kaoru deadpanned.

"Aren't I just?" he grinned before striding outside with his heavy bag of camera equipment.

Kaoru watched him go and crossed her fingers and toes while silently sending a prayer to God to help her friend out.

"What's this?" Kenshin held her wrist up, her fingers still tightly crossed.

"I'm praying!" Kaoru stated crossly, annoyed at having her prayer time interrupted.

"I never thought you were the type to cross fingers." He murmured kissing her lightly on the mouth.

"Well I am and it's your fault if nothing works out for Kamatari today. You may have intercepted my message to God with your actions."

"I doubt that." He mumbled into her neck as he hugged her middle tightly.

"Watch those hands!" she admonished lightly as his hands crept downwards. "I don't have time for this – I have to go with Kamatari!" she whispered frantically, as she felt herself melting in his embrace.

"Alright." Kenshin let go reluctantly "But only if you promise that we can spend all afternoon together."

"Okay." She sighed as if she really didn't want to. Kenshin grinned at her forlorn expression and kissed her temple.

"I'll be waiting." He murmured striding away in the direction of the kitchen and she watched him go with a keen look of interest. His ass looks so good in those jeans. Kamatari cleared his throat loudly and quite pointedly from the front door.

"Not all of us have Mr Perfect waiting for us when we get home – shall we go?" he mocked her, as a telltale blush worked its way up her neck.

"I don't know why we're friends." She grumbled.

"Because you love me, and we both know it."


"I think we can safely say that Kaoru and Kenshin are in the bag." Tae commented.

"Definitely." Sae agreed.

"Are you two sure you're not into sukebe things? Because the way you two watch other people is weird." Commented Megumi dryly.

"We – " began Tae.

"Are observant –"continued Sae

"And meticulous in our observations." Tae nodded.

"But this does not mean," Sae stated pointedly

"That we are perverts," Tae inserted.

"Rather, we like to be informed." Sae concluded, and both twins nodded; satisfied with their combined efforts in relating what they believed, was a pretty good explanation of their behaviour.

"Of course." Megumi arched an eyebrow at them.


Kenshin perused the shelves of his DVD library carefully for something that would pop out at him – but he didn't feel anything pop as he slowly looked through the titles. He didn't feel like something light and brainless – he was in a thinky mood, which meant he needed a psychological mind bender or a political thriller. Identity he murmured the title under his breath and stood looking at the case thoughtfully. Yeah it popped. Without hesitation he slipped it out and made his way to the media room to watch what he hoped would be a good thinky movie.

Yahiko caught sight of Kenshin striding to the media room and scrambled up from the dining room table to follow him.

"Oi Kenshin! Where're you going?"

Kenshin halted at Yahikos call and turned "Going to the media room to watch this." He held up the DVD case.

"I-dent-tity." Yahiko repeated dutifully. "Can I watch too?"

"Yeah sure" Kenshin shrugged – the more the merrier. In the end Megumi, Sae, Tae, Sano, Tsubame, Tomoe and the recently arrived Akira all sat down to watch the movie.

Kenshin felt a little pang of nostalgia. He wished Kaoru were here so he could share his couch space with her. So he could wrap her inside his blanket and smell the Jasmine wafting off her clothes and hair. Maybe he was becoming a little obsessed, but he liked the feelings she invoked within him. Smiling softly he pressed play on the DVD remote and waited for the movie to start.


Kaoru examined the grounds of the winery and thought about Tomoe's dress. The silk was a light fabric which would get caught and rip on the hard grass. Scratching her chin she turned to find the recent subject of Kamatari's interest approaching her.

"Hello!" He exclaimed with a smile on his face.

"Hi! You must be Shishio Makoto – I'm Kaoru Kamiya, Tomoe's designer." She grinned back.

"Ah yes she mentioned that her photographer and designer would come by for a few last minute check ups." He glanced hesitantly over his shoulder to where Kamatari stood at the edge of the winery. "Is he the photographer?"

"Yep – I believe you met him the other day?"

"Yes." Shishio stated quickly "but I didn't catch his name…" he trailed off uncertainly. Damn Kamatari probably had a mental freeze, decided to act bitchy and not give his name. Kaoru felt like rolling her eyes.

"Ah yeah, that's Kamatari." She smiled.

"Oh…" Shishio looked a little lost as if he wasn't really standing and talking to Kaoru at all, but someplace far away.

"Do you know him?" She asked a little hesitantly.

"No – we only met the other day." He said faintly as they both watched Kamatari stand slightly away from them, hands in pockets.

Kaoru wondered what was happening, because in her head it seemed as if Shishio Makoto was afraid of Kamatari. Not scared but very aware and highly conscious if him.

Kamatari could hear Kaoru chatting happily to Shishio as he took pictures and imagined settings for the bridal album. Tomoe would want black and white, as well and Sepia, and she'd want them from scratch meaning no Photoshop, which was a shame because he so loved Photoshopping peoples digital photos. The logistics of the wedding were starting to make his head hurt. Since it wasn't all digital he had to bring along most if not all of his equipment.

"Tomoe told me that you might need a place to store you equipment?"

Kamatari turned to find Shisho smiling at him, with a slightly uncomfortable look on his face.

"Mmm I though maybe I could leave my things in my van, but they'd ruin in the heat, particularly if it's a sunny day." He mused thoughtfully. Though he had turned to look at the man, Kamatari observed the landscape as he spoke. "I'll take anything you've got that's close to the wedding area, dark and cold" he flicked a finger out for each characteristic he needed.

"Sure!" Shishio rubbed his hands together "follow me."

Shishio unlocked a wooden door to reveal a dark cold room full of potatoes. "Gotta keep' em out of the sun otherwise they start growing shoots."

Kamatari had mild interjections about keeping his priceless equipment with potatoes but it was actually pretty good. Apart from the mouldy smell.

"I can have a table placed in here for the actual day so you wouldn't have to put your stuff on the ground." He tipped his hat back to survey Kamatari's reaction.

"Thank You – this will do well."

"Okay, great." He nodded in response, while eyeing Kamatari's camera with intense curiosity. "How – how much was that camera? Must have set you back a few hundred eh?"

"This old thing?" Kamatari lifted his Phantom Protoype"A few thousand." He shrugged and hid his grin as he turned away from Shishio's slightly shocked expression.

"How big does the table need to be?" he asked as Kamatari strolled away.

"Whatever fits?" he shrugged, because he knew that there was now way on earth on all his 'stuff' would fit on one table in such a puny room.

"Ah, okay." He heard Shishio mumble ineffectively attempting to shut the door of the potato barn. Kamatari felt Shishio at his shoulder as he walked down the wide path between the wines. "These are our summer vines." He explained a little breathlessly "they're still waiting to be hand picked."

"Who picks them?"

"Me and a bunch of people in town who want casual summer work."

They arrived at the base of the path and Kamatari looked up at the apple tree, its blossoms had fallen long ago. He wished he had his macro – then he could take some really good close up shots of the wine grapes and bark of the apple tree.

"My wife planted this tree." Shishio stated quietly.

Kamatari kept looking upwards, pretending to observe the beauty, while inwardly struggling with his disappointment.

"Why?" he didn't want to know and at the same time he did. Damn him and his stupid curiosity.

"She used to say that apples had many uses."

Used to? Kamatari had that feeling again. He so badly wanted to ask, but he knew it was really none of his business. But apparently he didn't have to.

"She passed away a long time ago, just after she gave birth to our son." And in Kamatari's world things were going from bad to worse. A wife and a son – what had honestly made him think he had a chance?


Kamatari had been silent on the drive up, but in a hopeful mellow kind of way. On the way back however, he was in a contemplative and deeply thoughtful mood. It was casting a dour environment over Kaoru and she wasn't appreciating it.

"Okay what did he say that has you like this?" she demanded.

"What do you mean?" Kamatari shot her a quizzical look.

"You're all mopey now." She raised her eyebrows at him.

"He had a wife."

"Had?"

"Passed away." He inserted shortly.

"That doesn't mean –"

"You're clutching at straws, Kao." He asserted, his tone brooking no argument.

Kaoru didn't speak for the rest of the trip home.


Kenshin watched Ayame and Suzume splash around with glee, they're little arms ringed with floaty swimmer aids. He carefully manoeuvred his leaf catcher through the water to pick up stray foliage that had fallen into the pool. It was becoming cool again in the afternoon, luckily for the girls, the pool was heated.

He sighed resting the catcher on the ground at his side. Water dripped onto his arm and he wondered when Kaoru and Kamatari would be home.

"You and Kamiya are apparently an item." Aoshi stood next to him silently observing the pool water ripple. It was a statement question, which was typical Aoshi behaviour.

"Well, I'd like to think that we have what it takes for a good relationship to develop." He shrugged. Aoshi nodded, his eyes still glued to the pool water.

"I've heard the Jaspers Brush winery and restaurant is not far from here." He stated cryptically.

"Mmm it's owned by an old couple, but they don't produce the wine on the premises. I've heard good things about that place."

"As have I."

"Are suggesting that I take Kaoru there?" Aoshi merely lifted one shoulder eloquently.

"That is at your discretion." He answered, and Kenshin wondered if this is what Aoshi believed constituted a discussion about personal relationships.

"Kaoru deserves to have a type of man who can do anything for her." Kenshin paused thoughtfully "and although I know I can do many things, I don't really care if there is someone better for her out there. I want her to be mine."

"That is an oddly possessive attitude to have after only 2 weeks."

"2 weeks is a long time – especially when you spend almost all day together."

"Mmm. And what does Kamiya think?"

"Kaoru is…she's taking it slowly and that's the way we both want it." but sometimes I want to throw that agreement out the window he added silently.

Aoshi nodded yet again at his diminutive friends thoughts. This Kamiya woman appeared to have inserted herself quite well into the Himura household. Which was a difficult feat since the Himura's were a very tight knit family; almost like a well formed Han. He himself had never experienced a real family life. His relations had left him long ago, and most of his time had been spent in the company of Kenshins family. Which in the most real sense was a collection of individuals such as himself.

Kaoru came bustling out of the house with an expressionless look on her face. Her knee length floral dress with matching hat and shaded her face so Kenshin couldn't really make out her eyes.

"Kamiya." Aoshi stated shortly once Kaoru had arrived at the pool, inserting herself neatly between him and Kenshin.

"Aoshi, Hi!" she smiled politely at him "Hi girls! Oh that water looks good!" she commented happily, linking her arm with Kenshins. She waved at Tae and Sae who both lay on sun beds under a large umbrella reading.

"How was you trip today?" Kenshin murmured.

"Oh you know, little bit of this, little bit of that." Kenshin raised his eyebrows as she obviously evaded his question. What was wrong with everyone today? He glanced back at the house to check whether Kamatari was coming out to join them. Apparently not.

"Where's Kamatari?"

"Oh he's probably in his lab." She shrugged hugging his arm. "So, what have we got planned for this afternoon?"

"I'll tell you later." He smiled, knowing that it would pique her curiosity to the point where she would pester him until he gave in. He watched her pout from the corner of his eye and set down the leaf catcher at the edge of the pool. "Tae, Sae I'm going inside alright?"

"Okay Ken!" they replied in unison.

As they walked away Kaoru's hand tightened around his own.

"Okay – what's wrong?"

"You know how we both thought that Shishio wasn't married or attached?" he nodded. "Well he had a wife."

"Oh." Kenshin replied faintly.

"I wouldn't say Kamatari was upset, I think he was disappointed." She related quietly.

"We all experience disappointment in our lives Kaoru, he'll survive."

"Yeah but this guy seemed really nice and he seemed interested."

"Sometimes friendly gestures can be misconstrued." Kenshin attempted to smooth over Kaoru's hopeful commentary.

"No, I'm so sure it was different. And I'm not saying this because I know Kamatari hoped he'd be interested." Her tone was firm.

Tomoe heard snippets of Kaoru and Kenshin's conversation as they walked into the house. She'd heard a little about Kamatari's fascination with the owner of winery. It was encouraging to think that Kamatari might find someone to start a real relationship with, instead of all the momentary pleasure dates he been indulging himself in. She looked at the invitation in her hand and knew it couldn't have arrived at a better time.

She slowly descended the stairs, to meet Kaoru and Kenshin.

"Hi Tomoe." Kaoru called out.

"Hi you two" she responded in her soft elegant way.

"What's the down low?" Kaoru asked casually.

"We got an invitation from Shishio Makoto, inviting all of us to his winery for an opening celebration of one of his new wines." She smiled softly.

Kaoru squealed and plucked the invitation from Tomoe's hand.

"We cordially invite you to the first tasting of our newest variety of summer wines." Kaoru read out aloud. "Awesome" she breathed softly.

Kenshin inwardly breathed a sigh of relief at the invitation – now he didn't have to be an interfering busybody (even though he was practiced at it in a very subtle, sneaky and invasive manner without being completely obvious that he was having said person investigated or plotting their ruin etc etc). Although he and Kamatari had worked through their differences, Kenshin didn't want any new tension.

Kaoru felt like jumping up and down in excitement, and she did. Bouncing on the balls of her feet she flapped her hands around and jumped into Kenshins arms childishly. Her glee rubbed off on him and he responded by hugging her tightly, and lifting her off the ground.

Tomoe watched Kenshin respond to Kaoru's openhearted gestures and smiled. He was opening his heart and mind to Kaoru in a way she had never imagined. Akira was the exact opposite to what Kenshin had been when he was her boyfriend. He had given her a white iris plant for her living room – because her beauty was soft and quietly exquisite. Her heart had beaten so fast as he'd said it, and she remembered her face growing warm. It was the first time a man had made her blush. Akira had said she'd looked incredibly pretty.

Kenshin and Kaoru continued on past her and up the stairs, still looking at the invitation. Suddenly she missed Akira even more than ever.


Kenshin watched from his bedroom window as Kamatari spoke to Tomoe on their front lawn. It appeared as if Kamatari wanted to take some wedding photo's in front of the fountain and was discussing it with her in his naturally animated manner. They both noticed Kenshin watching and while Tomoe favoured him with a small wave, Kamatari gave him a small mocking salute. He wasn't sure why but it was kind of annoying. They obviously still had issues to work through, and Kenshin wasn't sure why he thought that everything was going to be okay between them. The fact that Kamatari had refused to say anything to him the other day about Shishio displayed that there still residual tension. He knew Kamatari had confessed to Kaoru, otherwise she wouldn't have reacted with such excitement to the invitation. He would talk to Kamatari again after the party. His relationship with Kaoru was progressing albeit, slowly but taking shape and becoming serious in nature. It was a new experience to feel comfortable and enjoy that slight acceleration in your heartbeat when you saw that person you had been waiting to see all day. Kamatari had to understand, he just had to.


Kamatari didn't want to go. Yahiko on the other hand was excited. The party gave him another opportunity to fully monopolise Tsubame's time and most of all he'd get to see her in a cute dress, something where she left her hair out, he thought dreamily. He also had the opportunity to impress her with his impeccable dress sense. Being notorious for dressing his own models, Yahiko decided to consult Kamatari for advice.

"Oi Kamatari, what do you reckon I should wear tonight?"

"Clothes." Kamatari responded immediately.

"HA HA." Yahiko replied sarcastically "nah seriously Kam, just for tonight." He whined. "You're going aren't you?"

"No."

Yahiko raised his eyebrows at the quick retort, as Misao strolled in with Megumi in tow.

"Who's not going where?" Misao asked quickly, plopping into a chair near the window.

"Kam isn't going tonight." Yahiko reported dutifully.

"Well that can't be right." Megumi watched Kamatari from the corner of her eye as she sorted through Yahiko closet "I was told that you were the photographer for the evening."

"I never agreed to that." Kamatari deferred flatly.

"Well your name was tossed around quite a bit by that Shishio guy – he expects you to take all the photos." Megumi continued slyly. This was the first time Misao had heard that set of events. In reality in went more like this:

"No photographers for this evening." Shishio chuckled uncomfortably "It's not that big of a deal."

"But of course it is!" Megumi chimed in "In fact Kamatari told me he would be more than happy to take some photos here and there." She flashed her trademark fox smile.

Kenshin stared fixedly at Megumi.

"Well if he's happy to do it…" Shishio trailed off uncertainly.

"Of course he is! We'll be there, with our bells on!"

Misao decided, quite wisely in her own opinion, to keep her mouth shut. If there turned out to be a problem, she could always pretend like she hadn't been there in the first place.


Kaoru opted for a simple dark blue silk creation which ended just above her knee. It had a russetted bodice with tulip skirt and luckily she had her dark blue Tony Bianco's that would match the dress perfectly.

Kenshin looked resplendent in a black suit with a dark blue shirt open at the neck. He had quietly told her that she looked exquisite. She could still hear the way his low whispered comment had made her bite back a gasp as he lightly bit her earlobe. The hand that lay possessively on her hip had tightened momentarily, and she could feel the heat of his skin through the fabric. The man knew he was driving her crazy with his little ministrations but he kept doing it. Now he was alternating between throwing her heated glances from under his long bangs and studying her mouth with an intense expression on his face. Her mouth was going dry and they hadn't even gotten to the party yet. Shaking off her seductive day dreaming she peered window of the car. The winery had been cutely lit up by small designated oil lamps, on the veranda and up the long driveway. At night it was spectacular view with the rolling dark mountains and the moon high in the sky as a backdrop. Kaoru gripped Kenshins hand tightly in her own and strode confidently up the steps where Shishio was waiting to greet them.

"Thank You for coming!" he greeted them happily.

"Thank you for having us." Kenshin responded politely.

"We wouldn't miss this for the world!" Kaoru added.

"Please go inside and have some canapés and warm up by the fire." He directed them towards the glowing interior of the house.

They all strolled in together, the warm room sweetly enticing them in. As Kenshin strode further in however, his hand tightened inexplicably around Kaoru's. She placed her left hand on his jacket lapel questioningly, but Kenshin was looking elsewhere. His gaze had been completely ensnared by someone standing near the fireplace. At Misao's loud gasp Kaoru looked over her shoulder, only to see Kamatari quickly smother it with his hand. Teetering backwards Misao attempted to balance herself by holding onto Kamatari while Megumi's lips tightened, and her eyes narrowed menacingly. Everyone in the Himura household had lost their cheerfulness at the sight of the slight figure standing nonchalantly by the roaring fire. From their collective reaction, Kaoru had a fair idea of who it might be.

My god it's been so long

Never dreamed you'd return

But now, here you are

And here I am

Oh, hearts and thoughts they fade

Fade away

Fade away...


Hmm for some reason this chapter seems incredibly uninspired. It was difficult to write and I'm not very happy with it...

You know the drill - the good, the bad, the ugly.

Cheers,

Iuvenalis.