Author's Note: Thank you very much for all the reviews, they mean a lot to me especially now because I've been feeling a bit blue lately. I'm sorry for the late update, I wasn't available earlier on today.

Chapter Nine – Morning III

A loud bang woke Maura up abruptly. Heart beating fast in her chest, half-asleep brain trying to understand what was going on. Pale morning light piercing through the curtains of her bedroom. She could see the sky from her bed. She could see how low the clouds were. A gray landscape. It would snow, that much she was certain.

Sputters caught her attention. It came from downstairs, from her living-room. From the kitchen, maybe. And then she remembered everything.

A loud growl escaped her lips. How many times would this happen? And why? And how? Was it all just a dream? If it were then it had to be the longest night that she had ever lived.

Yet she knew that it wasn't a dream. She knew that she wasn't sleeping. She was fully awake and aware of everything. Yet absolutely not ready to live it all again.

What if she stayed in bed? Would Jane end up showing up? Would she poke her head inside the bedroom to tell Maura that Jo Friday had messed up with the Christmas tree? That it was the reason of the loud bang that had woken Maura up?

Was everything defined to happen according to a certain way? Or could she, Maura, try to change it the way she wanted to?

At least such thought made her focus on something else than on her frustration. She was a scientist and she was a very patient person. Perhaps she should try to take advantage of her own skills and temper to get the best out of this incomprehensible situation. She wasn't spontaneous. She knew it. Thus she couldn't rush downstairs and give Jane a passionate kiss. Besides she didn't like the idea. She didn't want to force anyone in a kiss.

She got up, put a woolen shawl on her shoulders and slowly walked out of her bedroom without really knowing what to do. She was moodless. She felt lost and blue. None of this made sense and it drove her crazy. Completely crazy.

Her steps led her downstairs. As expected, Jane was rummaging around in the Christmas tree that they had bought and set up together three weeks earlier. But Maura barely paid attention to her friend. She waved a vague hello and headed straight to the kitchen to pour herself a cup of coffee. Of course new pastries had been put down on the kitchen counter but Maura decided to not pick any. What if her body didn't follow the same scheme as the passing of time? She would end up with an extra ten pounds if she weren't careful.

"It's not ruined, Maura. I swear it's not. Look!" Jane showed the tree. "I've put it all back already."

Maura didn't even look at the tree. She was focused on her snowy patio, a hot mug of coffee in hand. At least the smell of caffeine was comforting.

And then she talked. Finally.

"I don't care."

The silence that followed her remark turned out to be a lot more entertaining than what she would have thought. She turned around and looked at Jane who seemed to be quite confused by her reaction.

"Really? But... It's... A Christmas tree. I know how you love them. Jo Friday messed up with it. The moment we walked in, she went straight for the tree and made it fall down. I'm sorry."

"Are you seeing someone?"

Maura blushed. She hadn't planned on being so blunt but the words had come out before her to even realize that they were about to hit the air. Jane frowned.

"What?!"

"I said: are you seeing someone? Are you dating someone? Or is there someone you would like to go on a date with?"

"Like... Who?!"

"I don't know." Trying to sound casual. Failing miserably. Maura held back a sigh of frustration. Why did she have to be such a bad actress? "A... A man... ? In his mid-forties, for instance. Dark hair, quite tall. Elegant."

Jane frowned again. She looked completely lost.

"That's quite a precise idea you have here."

"Maybe. So are you seeing someone?" Maura grabbed Jane's cell phone from the kitchen counter. She waved the device to Jane. "You're going to see him this afternoon. At the BPD."

"I'm not going to the BPD today. I'm on a day off. Have you forgotten about it?"

Maura shook her head.

"They're going to call you later on this morning. And you will have to go. Then once there, you'll see someone you like. Someone I don't know." Maura swallowed hard. "So please, answer my question, Jane. Are you seeing someone?"

Maura sounded jealous and she knew it. Just as she knew how ridiculous it was. But she hadn't had time to plan anything else. Thus she was trying to be spontaneous. What a big fail.

Jane laughed nervously. She cast a glance at Jo Friday who was peacefully sleeping on the couch then she looked at Maura again.

Maura frowned. Was Jane trying to win some time?

Jane shook her head.

"Are you alright, Maura? I mean... No offense but you sound a bit..."

A loud bang interrupted Jane. She turned around and looked at the door. Why had someone knocked so vehemently? A second bang echoed the first one. It made Jane jump.

Maura pouted. Jane hadn't answered. As a matter of fact, she had avoided an answer. And Jane wasn't like that. She was direct. Or at least she usually was. Maura looked at the door. She knew what was coming. And she could avoid it.

But she decided not to.

Or worse actually.

"Can you please answer the door for me, Jane?"

"Sure."

Tinsel in hand, Jane walked to the door with a strong determination. Maura smirked. Maybe Jane was not seeing anyone, maybe she didn't know yet who that man was, but the truth was so blurry anyway that Maura wanted to restart the day with her very own loud bang.

Jane barely had time to open the door that a snow ball hit her straight in the face. Children's laughter echoing in the distance. Their hurried steps muffled by the snow.

Maura brought the mug to her lips in order to hide her smile. She wasn't moodless anymore. Not at all. She had been too weak until now. Lacking self-confidence. The tears, the doubts. It was over now. She was here to fight and win. To be strong and in control of everything.

Third time was a charm. She was ready to prove it and it started now.