Disclaimer: Shaman King © Hiroyuki Takei. Last Chance © sOrbetes. :D

Wow. My long absence makes me think readers have forgotten this fic already. T__T Anyway, here is sOrbetes and I bring with me CHAPTER 8: Selfishness. I do hope you enjoy this.ü


~8~

Yoh was being selfish.

Yet, however unfair he might be, he will not stop. He found that being selfish is the only means to at least make things right. At least. But that was only an excuse, a pathetic excuse to justify his actions. Manta said so himself when he called to ask what happened, "Demo Yoh, the end does not justify the means. You know that, right?"

Yes, he knew that, and if there is any other means he would have opted for it. But there was none. If he won't break the rules, he wouldn't have any reason to hold on to her until the end. It is only in his selfishness that he gains a reason to be with Anna. If selfishness were to give him the chance to spend a little more time with her, if it were to allow him to touch her, to hold her hands, to gaze at her eyes, to love her... then let him be.

Just this once, let him be selfish.

Afterall, everything will only remain as memories once this is all over. He still deserves a happy memory to keep, don't you think?

"What are we doing here?"

"Well," Yoh gulped. "Manta asked us to help his company's foundation in their activity so..."

"Us?" Anna emphasized with that I'M-GOING-TO-KILL-YOH-ASAKURA tone that she uses whenever Yoh inconsiderately decides for himself --and for herself.

He smiled nervously. "Gomen, Anna! I knew you wouldn't like this idea but Manta needed help so I thought to give him a hand and--"

Her lips curved the slightest bit. She never said she didn't like the idea, did she? She was angry that Yoh decided this alone but she never said she didn't want the thought of going here. "It can't be helped."

"Huh?" Yoh raised his head which was, apparently, bowing for forgiveness.

Instead of repeating herself (which is very unbecoming of Anna Kyouyama), Anna began treading to the entrance of the small house where she would be spending the rest of her day. With Yoh.

Or so she thought.

"Cool! An orphanage! I never really thought about going here," the bubbly voice of Pirika did not fail to disappoint Anna. Not only did her chance to spend this day with Yoh come to waste, she would also have to make do with Pirika's cheerfulness. Since when did she become that happy around with Tao, anyway?

"Our company also supports this kind of righteous stuff," Ren spoke behind Pirika. She looked up at him. "Let's go visit one too," he said while taking her hand and securing them inside his pocket. Although she knew his promise were not to happen, she still sweetly smiled at him and nodded her head in agreement.

The orphanage is not very spacious and the overall structure needed some repairs here and there. Nonetheless, the atmosphere of love and family it emitted proved that it was the right place for its residents.

"Irashaimase!" greeted the head of the orphanage. "Douzo yoroshiku!"

She was a woman on her early forties, normal physique and had that loving mother image –very much fitting to become these children's caretaker.

"Sorry for the trouble," Yoh smiled back. The four of them sat in the receiving area and were oriented by the woman who introduced herself as Mayu. After a few more chats, Mayu went to fetch the children.

"I can't wait to see them!" Pirika exclaimed. Anna only kept it to herself but she was excited to meet the children as well. Yoh glanced at Anna and secretly smiled. From her expression, he can tell that she is enjoying herself. He was glad he made the right choice.

"I want to spend this month doing the things she loves," he said, his voice had a hint of poignancy in it, the other person in the line could tell. He continued, "I want to leave her a happy memory of me."

"And what are those things?" Manta asked.

Yoh took a deep breath. "Anna…" he began. "She would like to visit an orphanage. Yeah, she always wanted to do that. She always had the heart for orphans, probably because she is an orphan too. I guess visiting one would be nice."

"Ah! I guess I can help you with that then," the successor of the Oyamada company replied with a brilliant idea in mind. He will support Yoh with whatever decision he has made although he himself thinks otherwise. Going to an orphanage would make Anna happy, Yoh said…and was there something about 'feeling of being a family' that he talked about? Whatever it was, Manta will help Yoh the best way he can.

"Irashai~!"

"Welcome to our home, Oniichans! Oneesans!"

"Thank you for coming here!"

Tiny voices came shouting one after the other to greet their oniichans and oneesans. Pirika and Yoh could not hide the big smiles in their faces as soon as they saw the children. Yoh's friendly grin was a magnet to the children and he immediately became the new generation Buddha as boys and girls of different ages clung to him.

"Everyone is so adorable! Kawaii!" Pirika exclaimed happily. She bent down and shook hands with the three year old boy who pulled her hand. "Hajimemashite! I'm Pirika-neesan!" she introduced herself.

The cute boy beamed proudly, "Hajimemashite, Pirika-neechan! My name is Redseb!"

Ren was reluctant to touch the children at first, making one poor girl teary eyed when he refused to take her hand. "Oi! Don't! I didn't do—"

"Stop crying."

The young girl looked up at the woman who stood in front of Ren. Her voice was not the sweetest she heard, and she wasn't as gentle as the other 'neesans she had seen, but the fierceness in her voice did not fail to relay her concern for the child. "You don't have to waste your time on that stu—Ren-niichan."

The fierce oneesan turned to the little girl whose eyes twinkled as she saw how beautiful her savior was. "Hai!" the girl blushed shyly.

Anna tried as hard to produce a smile for the sake of the little girl, but her death glare was as scary as they were when she threw them at Ren.

He gulped. How come that Ice Queen is fond of children?

"A-arigatou... 'neechan," the young girl softly mumbled. "My name is Seyram... I want to be like 'neechan... when I grow up..." Anna and Seyram exchanged barely seen smiles.

Yoh could only chuckle in amusement. Anna had inspired a young girl today. That child would be a great woman if she follows Anna's footsteps. He followed Anna and Seyram outside, along with all the sons and daughters of Buddha.

Meanwhile, the other oneesan was frowning at Ren.

"What?" he asked.

She stuck out her tongue at him. "That's what you get for being a bully!" Pirika giggled.

He blushed, "I am not."

"But you are," she teased.

"It's your fault!" Ren burst out.

She blinked, "How did it become my fault?"

"You shouldn't have left me alone!" he yelled. "If you were with me, I would've known the right thing to do." He said more softly, turning his head from her view, obviously to hide his embarrassment.

She suddenly lost her words. Pirika looked at Ren with a slight heaviness in her heart. Why did his words felt as if it meant something more?

"Ano…'Niichan," Ren felt a tug in his pants. He looked down and noticed a young boy clutching a book. "Can you read this for me?"

The boy handed over his book. Ren looked at Pirika, hopefully for help, but she was now busy with her playmates. He sighed and eventually took the book. He examined the cover, flipped its pages then looked back at the boy.

"You are Chinese, aren't you?" the young man beamed. "I am half."

Ren's curiosity was piqued, "Your father?"

"Hai! Okasan is French," the boy revealed. So that explains his silver-gray hair and his crimson eyes. Ren was somehow reminded of Jeanne. "They met here in Japan," he continued. "And died here, too."

He stared at the young boy, amazed at his optimism, "What is your name?" he asked.

"Men. The people here called me Men." Men furrowed his little brows, "So, are you reading it or not?"

The famous Tao smirk was flashed before the stubborn young boy, "I know someone who can."

"Redseb-kun! Wait for me!" Pirika pleaded as she chased the naughty angelic-faced kid.

"Pirika-neechan," a small voice called, stopping her from running. "Can you read this for me?"

"What's this?" she curiously reached for the book. It was called, The Tale of the Faceless Wanderer, so the cover suggested. She eyed the boy once again then skimmed through the book.

"It's in Chinese," she hesitantly said as if asking. "I-I can't read—"

"Of course you can!" the boy interrupted. "You stayed in China for two years, right? You even studied Chinese literature and history there."

It gave her a shock how this little stranger knew a bit of her life in China, but really, she should know who had a parrot for a mouth that spilled such personal information.

"Come on, Pirika-neechan, you can read it, can't you?" The manliness of the voice definitely did not come from any of the children. And Pirika was sure there is only one man with that voice that could make her heart flutter like crazy. That parrot-mouthed idiot.

"Ren…"

He smirked.

"Yosh!" she gave him her own lovely smirk. "Gather around, minna-san! Pirika-neechan will read you the Tale of the Faceless Wanderer!"

The children gathered around forming a circle. Seeing their eager faces gave Pirika the que to begin her story. "This story happened a thousand years ago." She began. "Once, there lived a man who had no face. No one accepted him because he was faceless, so he grew up without a home and became a wanderer. In one of his travels he met the most beautiful maiden in the village. He fell in love with her but never showed himself, afraid that she might see his faceless self…"

"How was he able to see the maiden, anyway? He had no face!" Perfect. She had been asking the same question to herself. Her orbs scanned the area to find something that could explain this literary flaw. She saw a pair of sunglasses...No. She can't possibly say that the faceless man saw the maiden through wearing magical shades, could she? That would be pathetic. She saw a banner written the word 'Contact Number'...Not that either. What? The faceless man wore contact lenses?! This is pathetic.

But then, when she saw a pair of golden eyes stare gently at her, she had finally found her answer. "Well… let's just say he didn't need eyes to see." She smiled at Ren who blushed involuntarily. "It was his heart who saw her, because the heart can see beyond what our eyes cannot."

Fate was rather playful for the wanderer. One night, he saved the maiden from the threat of three dangerous men. The maiden, instead of being frightened, fell in love with him. But her father was furious about their love so he locked her in her room, forbidding her from seeing the faceless wanderer ever again.

News about the maiden growing weaker because of sadness spread through the village. The wanderer wanted to see her but there was no way… unless he had a face. With a face, maybe her father will accept him. He sought for the powerful witch and magically gained his face.

It worried the maiden when she heard of the deal between the wanderer and the witch. As soon as the moon consumed the skies, the wanderer's heart would stop beating as it was the payment the witch asked for—she would take his heart, in place of his face. The maiden went against his father's will and hurried to find the man she loves. Her time is almost ending for the sun is slowly setting.

Alas! The two met just before the sun completely left the sky. The wanderer was no longer faceless, and he had the most beautiful face the maiden had ever seen. They held each other as long as they could, both knowing that their time is nearly over. The wanderer thought that giving up his heart for a face is worth it for now he was able to see her for the first time, to smell her scent and most importantly, to tell her, "I love you."

"…it was the first and last words that he spoke all his life. The wanderer's heart stopped beating as darkness consumed the moonlit sky." Pirika closed the book and conluded, "The end."

"Why didn't it end in happily ever after at the end, 'neechan?" Redseb asked, his face honestly wondering.

"Because life doesn't really have a happily ever after, idiot!" Men, the owner of the book, said harshly as he took the reading material from Pirika's hands.

Redseb began to tantrum, "He called me an idiot!!!"

"Men…" Pirika could only whisper. The maturity the boy had in himself surprised her a lot. Yet, she cannot help but agree to his answer. Perhaps the children did not understand the real essence of the story because they are yet to experience life at its worst. Sure, being an orphan is a great ordeal, but it's only a preview of how complex life can be.

They didn't know how difficult it is to decide for one's life… for one's happiness. They still haven't felt the maiden's feelings when she defied her father just so he could be with the man she loves. They didn't know how hard it was to be selfish to gain temporary happiness.

'Let's get back together.'

His words ran through her mind endlessly that night. Ren was being selfish… he asked to be with her again but what about his family? What about Jeanne-sama? She doesn't deserve to be treated like this.

Demo…

What about her? What about her desires? What about her feelings?

Two years ago until now, she had always thought about his parents, Jun-neesan, Jeanne and Ren but she never considered her true feelings. She had been giving all her life; she had given up her own happiness. Now that it came back, can't she take this chance? For once in her life, can't she decide for the thing that will truly make her happy?

She called the newest phone number she secretly copied from Ren's cellphone.

"Hello," a soft but nonetheless sweet voice answered.

"Jeanne-sama," she cried. "Gomen…"

Maybe she was asking for too much. Maybe she had hurt Jeanne with what she did. Maybe Jeanne did not really want to allow Ren to stay with her. But maybe…just a wishful maybe, she understood her that's why she agreed.

"Omedetou!" Ren patted her head along with his congratulatory remark. "You can still read my language, afterall."

Pirika flashed her own version of Ren's smirk. "I still practice when I have time."

"So you haven't really forgotten about me in these two years," he said. She nodded shyly. "Is that also why you want to be a doctor? Were you still thinking about my accident?"

"I have always thought about it," she confessed. "I had always thought if only I were the one who healed you that time… if only I had the same power as Jeanne-sama… if only I weren't so weak, what would have happened then?"

Ren bit his lip to control his emotions but his two-year old bitterness got the better of him, "You shouldn't have left in the first place! You even left without telling me!"

Good thing Pirika had prepared to be calm for this moment that she knew would happen sooner or later. "I had to," she replied evenly. "There was no reason for me to stay anymore. My training as Jun-neesan's apprentice was already finished. I only agreed because it was the only way for your family to accept me, but no matter what, I was still unacceptable… so I left."

"Wasn't I enough reason for you to stay?!" he asked angrily.

You were the only reason I stayed. "I didn't want to cause anymore trouble. It was for the best—"

"But it wasn't! I wasn't!" he shouted. And then his face fell yet, he still managed to look directly at her, "I was at my worst when you left!"

I'm sorry…

Before she could even voice out her words, Ren had already trapped her in the warmest of his embrace.

"Don't leave me anymore. This time, stay with me."

I'm sorry…

Jeanne-sama.

:::

Horohoro tiredly walked the route to the En Inn. He had just come back from Hokkaido where he had to turn down a million-yen offer from a very annoying buyer. Tsk. Are all Chinese businessmen as annoying as Ren?

Finally, he had reached the gates. He can't wait to eat whatever Tamao prepared for lunch. His tummy churned in response. "Yeah, yeah. We're getting near," he said, patting his stomach.

"Tadaima!" he greeted after closing the door and removing his shoes. "Tamao? Food?" Horohoro was starting to feel scared. He refused the offer of a nice dinner from that Chinese just so he could go home earlier and taste her cooking so don't you dare tell him that Tamao is not here, most especially that there is NO FOOD for him to eat. "Tamao!?" He was near hysterical.

Eventually, Horohoro's stomach found its way to the kitchen. Must be instincts. He was about to rob the defenceless refrigerator from its contents –be it a half-eaten bread, or the food the other week, or anything other than plastic and paper! Kami-sama, he was really hungry! As it was, he was about to rob the refrigerator, but he hid himself instead as she heard two voices talking.

He could barely hear them so he inched closer, slowly, near the door.

"You promised not to come here..." it was Tamao, he was dead sure. How can he mistake her voice as another woman? So she was here. But who was she talking to?

"Gomen!" Now this voice was rather tricky. The first person he deduced who owns that voice is unlikely to be here. That, or their orphan-visit thingy have been cancelled. Either those two reasons, or it wasn't really Yoh's voice.

That must mean...

"Hao-sama, onegai!"

Hao!

"I just wanted to check up on you," Horo's eyes narrowed. Checking up?! He was able to reprimand himself from strangling that bastard, not until he heard him say, "What's wrong with checking up on my sister-in-law?"

SISTER-IN-LAW?!

And that was when Horohoro Usui came out from his hiding.

"What is he saying, Tamao?" he looked straight into her eyes, grim all over his voice.

She averted, speechless.

A lovely sneer from Hao, "You were eavesdropping, Ainu. Quite impolite, if I may."

"Shut it, Hao!" he growled. "We made a pact, do not forget that."

"Psh. Whatever."

Horohoro pitied his friend when Yoh took Anna's belongings and walked with her to her room. He gave an angry glare to the heartless man who brought this burden to Yoh. "Oi!" he said, getting that bastard's attention. "Why the hell would you want to stay here until you get married or whatever it is that you want?! You've got everything you need in Izumo, don't you?"

"Izumo, you say?" Hao stared back. He recalled the slap her grandmother had given Anna that time when they got caught; he recalled the natives of Izumo whispering false gossips about Anna after that; he recalled every suffering she had to endure since then, and he recalled that he didn't want to see her being treated like that. Izumo, he says? He cannot allow Anna stay in Izumo and that was his reason, but he need not tell the Ainu that. "Where's the fun in that?"

"Bakayarou!" Horo spit. Hao simply laughed and began walking to his room.

"Matte!" he heard Horo stop him. Really, this Ainu is very much annoying.

"What?"

"Yoh..."

"Huh?"

"For Yoh, stop coming here."

Hao suddenly felt interested and so faced the Ainu again.

"Do not stay here until you and An–just, don't stay here. Leave Anna and Yoh until you get married. For Yoh. You've already taken much from him... give him this chance."

It was rather surprising for someone—a mere friend— to ask a favour for one's benefit. How can this annoying and stupid man do such a selfless act for his Ototou's sake?

The Ainu somehow amused Hao. He may have lost his sanity that night, but for some reason, he agreed.

"Whatever, Ainu. I'm leaving. I'll be coming back later for the main event." At this, the mischievous Asakura addressed Tamao a knowing smile before he turned his back and waved, "Farewell!"

Horohoro understood that smile. Now that Hao had gone, it was time Tamao Tamamura answer all his questions.

:::

It was getting dark and they had already finished dinner. Before they leave, the children had prepared a short program for their guests.

"Pirika-neechan, do you know how to sing?" The program's emcee, Matilda (honestly, the author herself does not know why she had thought of Matilda to play this part), one of the oldest in the orphanage, handed the microphone before Pirika could even refuse.

"No, no! I don't know how to sing!" she said, primarily to save herself from shame.

"You can sing with Ren-niichan then!" The smaller children pulled the both of them on the small platform that served as a stage.

"Oi! I don't sing either!" he blushed, a sure sign of Ren Tao's embarrassment.

Yoh was laughing and cheering for Ren, enjoying to the fullest the sight of his friend who was on the verge of loosing his Tao dignity that he protected dearly, much more dearly after his 'Yoh Asakura is like the wind' speech he made when he lost way back the preliminaries.

But he has his own misfortunes in his life as well.

"While Pirika-neechan and Ren-niisan sings, Yoh-niichan and Anna-neesama would be dancing!"

"EH!?" Yoh blurted out. He scarily moved his eyeballs to the left—right where Anna was sitting. She was emotionless as she always was. He gulped. This would probably be the last opportunity for him to dance her.

Yoh stood in front of her, meeting with the most beautiful eyes he had ever laid his eyes on.

"Will you dance with me, Anna?" he grinned sheepishly, reaching for her hand.

He would give up his heart for a face that can see her, that can sense her scent... that can tell her I love you.

True, Yoh was being selfish.

To himself.

To Hao.

To Anna.

- - - - - -

A/N: RAWR. =)) Wanted to finish this chap but I just couldn't bring my lazy self to do it. And school's just too tough! Glad I managed to push this through. And I'm still going to finish this even if you guys already forgot about it. No sir, I won't be making the same mistake again! I won't leave any fanfiction undone anymore. :D

I personally like how this chapter went. Hopefully, I have answered some of your questions, but it would be nice to raise more inquiries from you! Your opinions really do matter as they determine the course of the story. So let's here them, okay? :3

Don't be selfish and share some reviews for this uninspired author, would you? Thanks for reading!!! :)


PS. Those LIVEJOURNAL users can add my public journal, daisukissu. The link is in my profile page (click the WEBPAGE link). I would love to be friends with you there! :D