AN: Okay guys, so sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I've been super busy. I have dance and another play that I'm a lead in for my dance troupe, and so I've been having lots of practices. And they're about to get even busier, so I thought I should write this while I could. Now from here, my story may get a little melancholy. Once again, I'm writing this as I go, so I don't know where this may go. But enough of my blabbering, heres the chap.


Chapter 9: This Can't Be Happening

Clary awoke with a start, noticing she wasn't in her own bed, but then settled back down when she realized that she was in Jace's room. Just then, he walked in, almost warily.

"Hey, Clary..." Jace said nervously.

"Hey, Jace!" Clary said, a bit too cheery.

She jumped out of bed and ran over to him, planting a long kiss on his lips.

"What's up?" She asked when they parted.

"Why are you so... happy?" He asked confused.

"What are you talking about? Why would I not be happy?" Clary replied back, even more confused.

"Clary, don't you remember? What Robert said, why you were asleep in my bed, anything?" Jace asked, seeming afraid of her answer.

"No... What happened?" Clary asked, completely serious.

Jace let out a long sigh, and grabbed her hand, lacing his fingers through hers, before pulling her over to his bed, sitting her on his lap.

"Clary... Wow, this is really hard." Jace muttered to himself.

"Jace, just tell me. It can't be that bad." When he didn't start again, she added on, "What? Am I dying?" Clary said playfully before bursting out laughing. Jace's breath caught in his throat when she said that, and he had to force back the urge to vomit. Instead, he gripped his sheets so hard his knuckles turned white.

"Cancer." Jace managed to get out, but it was so quiet, Clary almost didn't hear it over her laughing.

Almost.

"What?" She whispered.

"Cancer. Leukemia. You." Was all Jace could get out, before a tear rolled down his cheek.

In any other situation, Clary would have reveled in the fact that Jace Lightwood, was crying. But not in this one.

Clary didn't say anything back, just ran to the bathroom, and could be heard throwing up in the toilet. Jace seemed to snap out of it, running to the bathroom, finding Clary curled up on the floor, crying with another nosebleed. He walked to the linens closet, grabbing a towel and picked Clary up bridal style, carrying her to his room and sitting her up on the bed. He dabbed at her nose until it was rid of any blood, and then just sat in front of her, waiting for her to say something.

"Just do it already." She finally whispered.

"What?" Jace replied.

"Do it. Break up with me." She answered sadly.

"Why would I break up with you?" He asked incredulously.

"Why? Because I have cancer. And I'm not going to make you stay with me through this, when it's all going to be a waste anyway." Clary answered.

"Clarissa Adele Morgenstern. If you ever-ever- think that I would leave you just because you have cancer, you better think again. I am never leaving you." He stated simply.

"Oh yeah?" She countered.

"Yeah." He replied sincerely.

"Well, if you didn't know, I'M DYING! Dying Jace! I will be dead. So there's absolutely no way in hell that I'm going to force you to just suffer through the rest of my small, short life. You should be happy." She stated.

"Well if happy is what you want me to be, then I'm not going anywhere." He replied, looking her in the eyes.

"I'm a grenade. And at some point I'm going to blow up, and I would like to minimize the casualties, okay?" She said bluntly.

"Clary, we're in this. Together. I'm not going anywhere. Okay?" Jace asked her.

"Okay." She said after a few moments. "This can't be happening." She added.

"We'll get through this. You and me, together. Forever and always, right?"

"Forever and Always." She answered smiling.


Clary did everything in her power not to have to go to school the next day, but with no such luck, her parents wouldn't let her miss.

So grudgingly, she trudged down the stairs on her way out, stopping when she ran into possibly the worst human being on the planet.

Raphael.

She stiffened the second his arm touched her to stop her from falling, and practically flew back 5 feet.

"Clary, Raphael offered to take you to school today, alright?" Her mom called from across the room, tear stains around her eyes, a pile of tissues next to her.

"B-b-but I thought Jace was taking me. He always takes me." Clary replied nervously.

"Yes, well I thought you and Raphael should get to know each other." Her mom replied casually.

"Well, maybe some other time." Clary answered hastily, before trying to retreat out the door, only getting pulled back in by Raphael.

She slapped him in the face as soon as his arm wrapped around her shoulders.

"Clarissa Adele!" Her father shouted.

"D-d-d-Daddy, please!"

Clary ran toward him, fear clearly evident in her eyes, and wrapped her arms around him, burrowing her face in his chest. Valentine immediately wrapped his arms around her after seeing the fear in her eyes.

"Clary, what's wrong?" Valentine asked concerned.

"He.. him, he..." Clary couldn't get anything else out before she started crying, and Jocelyn ran over and took Clary in her arms, allowing Valentine to talk to Raphael. She took Clary to her room, walking her to the bed, taking a chair in front of it for herself.

"Now, Clary. What's wrong?" Jocelyn asked sincerely.

"Raphael, he-he-. He wasn't good to me.

Jocelyn's breath hitched, but she gestured for her daughter to continue.

"Well, at the time, Jace and I were broken up because of a misunderstanding. Well Raphael and I were, sort of... Dating, I guess...Well I realized that it was just a misunderstanding between Jace and I, and that I still loved him, and only wanted Raphael as a friend. So at the last football game, and went to tell Raphael that, only, he didn't exactly... agree." When her mother didn't speak, she continued. "He raped me." Clary whispered so quietly, that he mother didn't hear.

"What? I'm sorry honey, I couldn't hear you."

Something inside of Clary just snapped.

"He raped me! He raped me, mom! I didn't willingly have sex with him, he raped me!" She screamed, before collapsing into her mothers arms, tears streaming down her face.

"WHAT?!" Valentine screamed.

Clary jumped, and looked over to her door. There, in the door way, stood Valentine, seething with rage, and Raphael, who had moments before wore a smirk, now expressed pure fear.

"Did you just say, what I think you just said?" Valentine asked calmly. Too calmly.

"I-I-. I said," Clary drew in a deep breath, before letting it out. "I said he raped me."

Valentine moved as fast as lighting, punching Raphael more times than Clary could keep track of, before grabbing him by the back of the neck, and throwing him out the front door.

"If you ever- ever -, come near my little girl again, there will be hell to pay." Valentine said, before he slammed the front door shut, and calmly walked upstairs.

"Well, now that that's all taken care of, who's up for going out to eat?" Valentine asked casually.

"What about school?" Clary asked curiously.

"Ehh, fine. We'll go after school, deal?"

"Hey, I'll skip school! We c- Okay. After school." Clary said before standing up. She made her way to the door, but stopped as her mother called her.

"Yeah?" She answered.

"Just, don't let them get to you. The kids at school." Her mother said.

"Yeah, I know. I'll be outta there soon enough." Clary replied, then added when they gave her curious looks, "Chemo." Then walked out the door without another word.


Clary opted to walk to school today, wanting to have some time to think before she stepped into school.

She walked up to her locker, surprised at what she saw. Tapped to, and piled around her locker, were bunches of flowers, with cards with cheesy sayings, 'Get Well Soon', & 'Thinking Of You', etc. Though as cheesy as it was, she couldn't help the smile on her face that broke out once she saw it all. Though it was beyond her knowledge on how everyone already knew about her... condition, she was still touched.

"Well, look at you, Miss Popular."

She smiled when she heard the voice, turning around and walking straight into his arms, wrapping hers around his waist.

"They know."

Jace didn't have to ask to know what she meant.

"Oh? And is everything, okay?" He asked.

"Well if by 'okay', you mean my mother is still bawling her eyes out, my father trying to distract me by taking me out to dinner, lunch, whatever, and the fact that I have cancer and somehow the whole school knows, then definitely, everything is just swell." Clary answered sarcastically.

"It'll get better." He answered surely.

"No it won't. Just stop trying to say stuff to make me feel better. It's only going to get worse. I'm gonna have to start chemo. And I'll lose my hair. And I'll start throwing up way more than I already am. And I'll have to stop going to school. This is my senior year. This is supposed to be my year. I'm going to lose everything. Literally." She said undoubtedly.

"Look, babe. Whatever the hell happens, I'm going to be right by your side the entire time. Lose your hair? You'll still look beautiful. Throwing up? Hey, at least you won't need to pull your out of the way, right? Sorry. Too soon... Anyway, what I'm saying is, it doesn't matter. Because you won't lose everything. You won't ever lose me." He said sweetly.

"But you'll lose me." She whispered, before walking to first period.


AN: Soooooo her parents know about Raphael. Happy with Valentines reaction. I think I am. Sorry if Clary seems a little OOC in this, but she's really distressed, and shocked, and worried, and a whole mix of emotions, so this is to be expected. Any thoughts, questions, suggestions, please let me know. Review! Thanks for reading and reviewing,

~FandomFreak1