brand new update, i know how much you guys love this story :))))))

"I forgot Phil, honest I did." I couldn't very well tell him the truth. Not now that I knew I couldn't truly get him out of my head. It didn't matter anymore if I had done it on purpose or not because I wish I had left my number. I was nervous, and I didn't know if he had changed for real or not. But this time, I was willing to put myself out there and find out. My heart wouldn't have it any other way.

Phil stared at me for a few more moments as though he was contemplating if he believed me or not. I hoped he did. Then, while looking away, he nodded, acquiescing that he believed me.

After a few seconds more of silence passed us by I was dying inside, pleading internally for him to say something. When I couldn't take it anymore I asked, "Would you like to continue talking inside?"

Not looking at me, Phil nodded, "Sure."

I took in a deep breath of relief. I quickly put my keys into the door and opened it for him. It was silent on the walk up the stars to the top floor. The quietness made me nervous. It made me think that maybe he didn't believe me yet. I was just going to have to convince him.

Another thought crawled its way into my mind. He came here to see me, not knowing if I intentionally left without my number or even a goodbye. He wanted something more with me than a one night stand. It had to mean something, that he was willing to track me down.

I opened the door to my apartment and let Phil inside. I could hear David in the kitchen moving some dishes around and I knew I had to get to him quickly. We walked a few steps farther where the room opened up and you could see the open living room and kitchen where David was.

Phil looked over at David and then down at me. "I'll be right back, just give me a moment," I told him and walked into the kitchen area.

"Hey Mee," David began cheerfully, "How was the date?" He finished, turning around and taking in Phil who stood watching us. He looked back at me, his face contorting into a confused frown as I reached him. "What's-"

"Don't David," I said in a hushed pleading tone. "Could you excuse us for a bit? And don't say anything to him ok?"

Instead of answering me, he asked a question of his own. "What's he doing here Mia? What happened to Scott?"

I waved my hand in a disregarding gesture. "He was a loser. And Phil just sort of showed up. I'm not sure how he found me. But please, I want to talk to him."

David looked as though he was about to say something but bit his tongue. "Fine," he answered, then shook his head as he turned away. "Unbelievable," he mumbled.

I sighed with relief, grateful I was able to get David to go to his room so easily. But the hardest part was about to come. Phil was still upset with me and I wasn't sure how I was going to fix it.

'What's changed?' I thought, my brows drawing together. 'One moment I don't want a relationship with him and suddenly I do?' As soon as I thought it I knew it was because I didn't realize how much I would miss him. It was as though there was this attraction between us, and once it was activated it just couldn't be turned off. My mind still wasn't sure if he was a good idea, but my heart really didn't give a damn.

Still in the kitchen, I turned towards Phil. "Would you like something to drink?"

"Sure," he said, sounding like he didn't really care, and could have easily gone without.

I took out two glasses and walked over to open the fridge, looking for something to offer him aside from water. "We have water, milk, some fruit punch, and there's also tea if you want it."

Phil put out his hands, "I don't care Mia. You don't even have to get me anything. I just came up here so that I could talk to you." His voice was dripping with frustration and it made me tense. He turned then and sat down on one side of the couch.

I closed the fridge quietly, not knowing what to do. Only minutes ago I had felt as though I could just talk to him and convince him of my feelings, but I didn't do well with confrontation. It was one of the ripple effects of high school. Any type of confrontation or raised voices and it didn't take me long to shut down.

I pushed the glasses to the back of the counter and made my way into the living room. Not knowing if he even wanted me near to him, I sat in the deep chair that was farthest from where he was sitting on the cream couch. My feet were pressed tightly together, my knees following suit. I brought my hands together and tried desperately not to wring them together with all my might.

'Would he be mean?' I wondered. 'Would he talk down to me like in high school? Would he tear me down?' Suddenly, this claustrophobic feeling was coming over me, as it always did when a conflict was brought right into my face. It was different with David, because I had known him for so long. And Clair was easy to talk to without getting into a spat. But I had known Brook for about a year and I still had trouble keeping my confidence if we ever argued about something.

"Mia," Phil's voice interrupted my thoughts. I looked up at him to see his head tilted to the side, his frown still plastered to his face, but a look of reprimand in his eyes. "What are you doing?" He patted the seat on the couch beside him. "Come sit here."

I took a deep breath as I stood and carefully made my way around the small glass coffee table and sat next to him. I tried to pay attention to my body language, so I could portray what I wanted. Instead of angling my body forward, and away from him, as my nervousness would have me do, I angled myself slightly towards him. After a few moments I looked up at him.

Phil put his arm on the back of the couch, behind me and positioned himself so that the leg closest to me was bent on the couch between us. He was looking down at the glass coffee table as he struggled to find the words he was looking for.

"I really am sorry Phil," I told him, hoping he would hear the sincerity in my timid voice.

He exhaled heavily. "I guess I still don't understand. I mean I do, but-" he looked up at me. "But I thought we had a great time, and that night-I just don't understand how you could have forgotten." A disgusted look crossed over his face. "And then you went out with that guy. I can't believe he wanted you to pay for your meal and for gas. It's not really any of my business, but I don't think he's right for you."
"I want it to be your business Phil," I said and quickly quieted knowing how it sounded. I wanted to be with him, no if's and's or but's. "I don't know how I forgot, I just did." I was sure it sounded even more lame to my own ears than it had his.

"And who was that?" he gestured to the kitchen.

"That was David, my roommate. We've been friends since elementary school."

"He didn't look happy."

I tried to shrug nonchalantly, "He rarely does."

It was silent again as I didn't know what to say and he struggled with the words he wanted to speak. It felt like ten minutes had passed before either one of us spoke, and I wished I had at least gotten myself a drink to hold and keep my hands busy.

I jumped slightly when Phil put his hand on my thigh. "What's wrong? Why are you so tense?" He asked me, his eyebrows raised and drawn, a worried and confused expression.

"Uh," I started, not really knowing how to explain without telling him I hated confrontation. It would sound like I thought he was going to hit me or something.

"You don't need to be worried about anything Mia," he said surely. "It's just," he took a deep breath and looked away, his hand still on me. "I'm not sure if you know this, but I have a lot of insecurities."

I looked up at him in surprise, not having any inkling at all that he would ever have anything to feel insecure about.

He gave a small lazy smile, "Don't look so surprised." He looked away once again, "I have things I'm unsure about all the time and I worry about quite a bit. And when we met, I felt this connection." His gaze found mine, the cobalt of his eyes capturing my brown ones. "For some reason you feel very familiar to me."

I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was. When he didn't recognize me right away, I hadn't counted on the fact that he might know me on the subconscious level.

"And when you left without so much as a goodbye I didn't really know how to take it. But then your friend came to my room," he paused, "I forget her name, the blonde girl."

"Clair," I told him. 'So it was her. That's how he found me. She went back and gave him my address.'

"Yeah, Clair. She showed up and gave me your address and told me to come by in a week or so. I would have come earlier, but I didn't even know if you wanted me around, since you didn't leave your number."

On one hand I was grateful Clair had given him my address, but on the other hand, I was upset. She had overstepped her bounds by going against my wishes and giving him my address. I was going to have to talk to her. I could hardly believe she went behind my back like that. Just because she thought she was right, didn't mean she had the authority to make the decision for me.

"I'm glad she found you."

His eyes pierced me and I wished that I could crawl my way onto his lap and hold him, let him know that I meant exactly what I said. Instead, I put my hand over his on my leg. "I've missed you," I admitted, and realized that I was completely comfortable now. It was crazy how much his feelings affected my own and I briefly wondered if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

Phil's face still held the brow furrowed, puppy eyed look as he gazed down at me. He took his hand from under mine and pressed it to my cheek and brought his mouth down to mine.

His lips caressed mine, the warm and gentle feeling causing a shiver to move down my body. Mistaking my shiver to come from the cold, Phil put the arm that was on the couch around my shoulders. I leaned into him instantly, savouring the feeling of him against me again. Oh, how I had missed him.

All too soon, he pulled away and hugged me. "I missed you too."

"Do you forgive me?" I asked when his arms fell from around me.

"Yes, but I'm going to make sure I get your number this time." He proceeded then to pull out his phone from his pocket and I gave him my number.

"How long are you in Chicago for?" I asked him, wondering if he was going to leave soon.

Phil pulled me onto his lap and I curled against him, my head lying on his shoulder. "I'm here for another three months. In two months I have to start training, and then the tour, and eating right." He laughed slightly, "Which I am not looking forward to."

"You don't like to train and eat right?" I asked, a mocking sound to my voice.

"Sure, make fun of me, but it sucks. I have to eat and eat and eat some more. I get so full it's uncomfortable. But the training part isn't so bad."

I chuckled, "Aw, poor baby."

"Clearly," he twisted so my butt was on the couch, but legs were across his, "you just don't understand."

I stuck out my lower lip in mockery. I was happy we were back to our playful interactions, and I felt a mixture of elation and anxiety that we were going to be able to start where we left off. I felt a kind of chemistry with him that I hadn't felt anywhere else, but I also knew how hurtful he could be, and that was frightening.

In response to my teasing he made a silly face and began to tickle my sides. "No!" I laughed and fell backwards on the couch. Unrelenting, Phil continued to assault my ribcage as he followed me down against the cushions. The tickling sensations flowing through me made my body jerk uncontrollably. I found myself involuntarily arching up against his body, sending a sudden wave of awareness through us both.

Phil stopped tickling me and our gazes locked as my laughter died down. It would have been impossible to ignore the heat between us that had never died, even with the distance. As I stared up at him I noticed the greenish flecks of colour in his eyes that made the blue stand out even more. I brought a hand up to gently rub against the thick, short beard he had.

Not waiting for me to take my hand away, he leaned down and captured my lips with another kiss that was so different than the one minutes before. I felt the heavy strength and firmness of his body press down onto me and I had no greater desire than to hold him close. I wrapped my arms around him as I kissed him back. The kiss took on new life as it quickly began to heat up, oxygen no longer being a top priority for either of us.

Phil traced his hand down my side and held my hip down as he gently ground himself into me. I slowly wrapped my legs around his hips, not wanting any space between us. His heavy breathing made my mind jumble, unable to form any clear thoughts. I felt the scrape of his rough beard against my skin and shivered, loving the manly texture.

He twisted his head to the side for better access as he thrust his tongue into my parted, waiting lips. I felt the heat of desire begin to pool between my legs as he ground harder against me and I found my hands moving of their own accord to the top button of his shirt.

My task was cut short when Phil moved his hands behind my back and lifted me up. I clung to his wide, built shoulders as he stood up from the couch. "Where's your room?" he asked through our kisses.

I took my mouth from his to give him directions. As we passed into the hallway I reached out with my hand to turn off the kitchen and living room lights, and then quickly brought my hands back around him to hold on. He found the door to my room and took a hand from my behind to open it. I stretched my arm to turn on my light to show him where the bed was before clicking it off again. As excited as my body was, my mind added in its relief that my room was clean and I had put away the Best In The World movie I had watched when the feelings of missing him had been too much.

Phil lowered me to the bed and let his weight rest on top of me, cushioning me softly into the mattress. He put his forearms on either side of my head, being careful of my hair. "Mia," he spoke.

I let my eyes focus and adjust to the darkness. "Yes?"

Phil was looking down intently at me, his eyebrows slightly raised, causing small wrinkles to appear on his forehead. I couldn't resist lifting my neck up, taking his lower lip between my teeth and giving a gentle tug.

I am normally a very shy person, I'm aware of that. Generally I am that way in all facets of my life, including in the bedroom. But in the bedroom with Phil, I wasn't shy at all. I was comfortable and confident enough in our chemistry that I could do whatever I thought would feel good and Phil would respond in kind.

Phil groaned softly, reached a hand underneath my butt and squeezed as he pressed down on me. I gasped at the sensation, letting go of his lip. I brought my hands back up to the buttons on his shirt and was working on the second one when he took his hand from my behind and stopped me.

I looked up at him confused; he had my total attention. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said and gave out a soft, breathless chuckle. His face lost its laughter after a moment and he said, "I don't want you dating anyone else."

I turned my head to the side, unable to move backwards for more space. "Is that your way of asking or telling me we're exclusive?" I had to admit my body had froze when he said that. Of course I wanted to be exclusive, but I needed to make sure that was what he was saying. It didn't even bother me that he was telling me, not asking. In fact, his telling me only made me hot, the feeling of being desired to the point of him trying to demand it was incredibly sexy.

Phil paused, thinking about his answer. "Do you want to date other people?"

Suddenly I felt guilty. He had just told me about his insecurities and I make it seem like I'm unsure about being exclusive. "No," I hold his face in my hands. "I don't want to date anyone else."

My hands moved a little as a grin spread across his face. "Good," he replied, the assured tone back in his voice.

I quickly found his mouth attached to mine once again, a new fire sizzling between us as a new sense of security was discovered. Phil wasted no time in beginning to undo the buttons on my own shirt while I worked on his. Once they were both undone, they made a soft thump as they landed on my bedroom floor.

Before I was able to make a move, my senses were sent reeling as he quickly undid the buttons of my dress pants and shifted up higher so he could slip his hand underneath the soft fabric. I was unprepared for the sensations and moaned softly, gripping him tightly as his talented fingers gently stroked me above my underwear. He had shifted up so that he was on his side beside me on the bed, and my head was against his shoulder. I had my one arm under his and the other wrapped around, firmly holding onto him.

I tilted my head back to look up at him. He took the opportunity to kiss me firmly. I took my hand from his shoulder and moved it to the back of his head, making sure he wasn't going anywhere. The burning fire within me mounted and built to new heights as his fingers began to make firmer and longer strokes, leaving no secrets as to the wetness that formed there.

I tried to lift myself up slightly, moving to be only a little above him. My hand left his head and went to the belt that held his jeans up around his waist. I clumsily worked to get it undone, and then moved straight to the button and zipper. I let out an involuntary breathy moan as I felt his hardness in my hand. Just feeling it in my grasp brought back the memories I so often thought of as I laid in bed at night as I slept alone.

"Mia," Phil groaned, parting his lips from mine. He then moved away, shifting to the foot of the bed. He leaned forward, taking the top of my pants and underwear in his hands before gently removing them. He stood and removed his own pants and boxers. He then removed my socks, and then moved back up, but not before giving a small tickle on the bottom of my foot.

My leg jerked away from him and I laughed. "Don't," I warned.

He chuckled with a shrug, "What?" He asked innocently as he lay beside me once again.

"You know," I answered, not really caring to continue the dialogue any more. Not when I had his body lying beside mine, naked and hot.

Phil didn't kiss me again; instead he unhooked my bra and tossed it on the floor before running his hands over my breasts, kissing them afterwards. I arched my back, pressing them farther into his mouth. His hot breath and lips sent searing shivers all over my body and I began to ache for him. As he sucked, his hand moved down my stomach to stroke the insides of my thighs with gentle fingers.

Uncontrollably, my hips began to rise, yearning for his touch at the very point where he would give me my release. "Phil," I gasped, knowing he was teasing me.

I felt him grin against my skin. "I love this," he murmured against my skin before leaning back up on his elbow to look down at me. I gazed back and my eyes widened, glazing over in the process as his fingers slid inside of my slick heat.

"You're so wet," he groaned, our eyes still locked onto one another's. I closed my eyes then, unable to keep them open for the pleasure was too high.

Wanting to give him pleasure while he pressed all the buttons he could I attached my mouth onto his nipple, gently sucking and licking. His fingers withdrew and he started to tease the small nub above my entrance. His other arm tightened around me, bringing me closer than before.

Without warning the pleasure inside of me rose swiftly, and I couldn't concentrate on giving anything back as I took in the sensations his hand was bringing me. I gripped him close to me as I tried to breath. "Phil," I moaned.

His palm worked faster, fingers moving in and out as his thumb turned in circles on the nub and core of my desire. "Come for me Mia," he rasped.

My body stiffened, rose up from the bed and I cried out as I clasped Phil's naked body as close as I could while waves of ecstasy rippled throughout me. The exquisite, pulsing sensations continued to tremor through me as his hand continued to work in and out.

As my consciousness floated back down from the shocks of my orgasm I had to grab his wrist, the stimulation being too much on my sensitive flesh. Phil didn't stop his movements, his strength too much for me. "Oh, Phil," I cried breathlessly and it came out as a pleading request.

After a short moment he released me from the capturing pleasure he stormed against my body. I barely noticed him leave to put on a condom before he came back. And without letting me catch my breath he laid beside me and pulled me up over him and covered my mouth with his.

"I need you," he groaned in desperation and I nodded against his mouth.

With an urgency I could hardly describe he grasped my hips in his hands, lifted me and pulled me down swiftly, pushing himself in, filling me entirely. My cry and his groan mingled; the sexual tension at its height.

Phil sat up and moved my legs behind him so I sat in his lap. I moved against him instantly, his hands underneath me, setting the rhythm he needed.

In the position we were in, my head was higher than his, his lips level with the base of my throat. My hands clutched his heated skin as he helped me move up and down on the length of him. His lips began to caress my collar bone before his thrusts began to pick up speed. His kisses on me turned aggressive; his lips going from giving kisses to small nips as he raked his teeth over my skin.

I gasped at the sensation, my head falling forward, my lips by his ear as he continued to guide me over him. I wrapped my arms around him, one falling on his back, the other on his head.

Suddenly, Phil's grip on me stiffened and he stopped my movements. He held me close as he turned me over and I was beneath him again. He lifted one of my legs up and hooked it over his elbow before he began making strong, frantic strokes within me.

I couldn't keep my cries of pleasure inside as he entered and withdrew. He brought his hand between our hot bodies and touched the core of my pleasure and I knew he was close.

Not long after he began touching me again did we both reach the limit of our desire. We cried out together and I marvelled at his ability to time my orgasm with his.

We laid there, breathing heavily as the shocks of ecstasy filtered through our bodies. We had our arms wrapped around one another and I smiled, completely satisfied. Phil leaned back slightly, only moving his upper body off of mine. He smiled softly and kissed me gently on the lips.

Without a word he rolled off of me and threw out the condom, apparently having noticed its location when I had turned on the light. He quickly came back to the bed and lifted the covers. We burrowed underneath the blankets and held each other close, not bothering to put on any clothes. I loved the feeling of his body against mine, and I wished that the moment could last forever.

Unfortunately, what makes the most beautiful moments in life just that, is the fact that they don't last very long. And in this case, after a few minutes basking in the feel of Phil, I remembered that David was home and had probably heard us. He was most assuredly going to be pissed.

But that wasn't the worst of it. Because as I contemplated David's words that would surely come tomorrow, I wondered if he would be right. I fought with myself silently in Phil's arms. 'Was this connection I had with him blinding me to the facts? Wasn't he still the same boy he was in high school? Was I kidding myself?'