*The Wrong Lifetime with the Wrong Man*
By yummydreams
oOo
Chapitre Neuf - Les Parkinsons
Malfoy Manor Number Two, London
Harry moved behind her and his hands stroke the sides of her breasts down to her hips, she shivered. He was blowing hot air into her ear which he knew she really liked and his hand wandered into her lacy underwear-
'Hem hem.'
Hermione woke up, she opened her eyes and peered up groggily at the ceiling; she nearly panicked at first when she did not recognise the dark wooden rim on the four poster bed but then she reluctantly remembered where she was and so, she relaxed immediately. She yawned and looked at Draco who was awake and lying on his side, his head propped by his hand.
'Good morning.' She said politely, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.
'You obviously had a good night.' He said rather pointedly, he watched her amusedly.
'What do you mean?' she frowned; despite their late night, she felt refreshed from her sleep.
'Pray tell,' he began, he deliberately paused to leer at her, 'why you decided that your nightie was better on my bedroom floor than on your person?'
Hermione looked down and suddenly realised that she was in her underwear (she decided to wear a bra to bed after the fountain incident) and the colour drained from her face when her eyes spotted the blue garment, her sleeping attire, was lying on the ground beside the bed.
'Oh f-'
'Oooooh Harry! Touch me there-' Draco cut her off by suddenly shrieking in a high pitch voice, he was smirking.
'Shut up!' yelled Hermione, snatching the dress and pulling it over her head at once. Her pale face immediately blushed furiously.
'Don't stop, Harry! Ohhhhhhhh myyyyyy GOD!' he squealed as he imitated her moaning.
'Please...stop it!' she cried, and buried her face into her pillow as he continued to make inappropriate sex noises in her ear. She was mortified!
He finally stopped teasing her because he couldn't stop laughing. When he finally settled down, he told her quite somberly, 'You mentioned my name quite a few times.'
'Oh god, what did I say?' she re-surfaced her head to look at him horrified for a couple of seconds before burying her head back onto the pillow; she cringed at the all the possible things she could have said.
'You told Potter that you thought Draco Malfoy was the sexiest thing ever and that only he could turn you on now.' He said shamelessly and immediately received a pillow thrown hard at his face.
'I didn't say that.' Hermione said angrily, she threw back the covers, no longer embarassed and went straight the wardrobe to pick out her clothes for today.
'Well after last's night little experiment, it seems we do have to sleep in the same bed together.' He commented, jumping out of bed as well. 'Learn to control yourself-'
'I was asleep, Malfoy.' she said pointedly.
'Well I don't want you stripping off in bed because you can't handle how hot I am in bed.'
'You are shameless, did you know that?' she said, she pulled out a brown checked shirt and some dark jeans.
'Don't you have other clothes?' frowned Draco, when he saw what she was going to wear.
'Since when did you are about my appearance?' she said rudely.
'My fiancé was a fashion designer. She was easily the most beautiful woman in the universe, I do have a reputation to maintain, I can't have my wife looking like a homeless man!'
He pushed her aside and examined the contents of her wardrobe (he had another wardrobe ordered in immediately- he didn't want her 'dirty' clothes to ruin his own expensive clothing).
'Brown, pink, green, black...is that all you wear?' he sighed.
'Yes...' she said, a bit uncomfortable but she raised her chin up, why was she feeling ashamed? Draco Malfoy was the last person on earth to tell her what to do!
'We are going to take you shopping and we are going to eat lunch in public.' He announced, pulling out a rose coloured blouse and exchanging it for the brown shirt in her hand. 'You better brush up your non-existent acting skills because we're going to give the public a little PDA.'
'Why?' she questioned, she was stubbornly holding onto the brown piece of clothing but he yanked it out of her weak grip.
'Because we are known that we absolutely hated each other in Hogwarts. And now we're together, even though Pansy managed to quiet things down after the wedding, people will talk and part of my mission statement for my company is honesty.'
'Honesty? You?' snorted Hermione.
'Yes, honesty.' Emphasised Draco. 'That's why people buy my products because I'm honest.'
'They obviously don't know the blonde haired ferret I know.' She said maliciously.
'Watch it Granger, I can say the same thing for you. What are people going to say if they thought you ditched the Wonder Boy, Harry Potter, who saved the world for this 'blonde haired ferret'? What are they going to think? Do you think people would still support this little research and rescue group of yours?'
Hermione bit her bottom lip; he had a point and she didn't like to admit it so she remained silent.
'I knew you'd see it my way.' Draco said triumphantly. 'Now let's get you some decent clothes and then let the role-playing begin!'
oOo
Harry and Pansy's bungalow, Bangor
The bright light entering the living room woke up Harry with a start.
His back ached from sleeping in such an uncomfortable position on the small couch. With his eyes still shut (to adjust to the harsh light), he unfolded his arms and stretched them out in front of him-
BOOM!
He snapped his emerald eyes open and located the source of noise- Pansy Potter was lying face flat on the ground. Her long dark hair spread across the carpet, her arms were trapped underneath her torso and her legs were tangled in the throw from the sofa they slept on.
Oh fuck...thought Harry, he forgot that she had instructed him to wrap his arms around her body so that she wouldn't-
'You stupid dick!' she yelled, her voice thick from sleep and shock. 'You were supposed to make sure I don't fall out!'
'Not a morning person, are we?' grinned Harry. He was particularly enjoying her unfortunate morning so far. 'Did we fall out of the wrong side of the bed today?'
Pansy still managed to muster an impressive dark glare, she stood up and raked her shiny hair back behind her ears and chucked the throw over him on the sofa.
'I hate you.' She declared.
' My feelings too, Princess.'
'Oh...your clothes from yesterday arrived. I hope JP got you some decent clothing.' She called from the hallway. 'Hurry up and get changed! Can you believe it's eleven am already? My parents and the Weasleys are coming over at half twelve for lunch!'
'You what?'
'I invited my parents and the Weasley parents over for lunch-' She repeated as she entered the living room carrying the many bags with his clothes (there seemed to be more carriers than he remembered and suspected that JP may had added to his wardrobe without his consent) and she dropped them onto the sofa.
'Mr and Mrs Weasley would never agree-' interrupted Harry.
'Well they already have.' Pansy emphasised, she looked disdainfully at the carpet on the floor and eyed the curtains, sighing. 'Mother's going to have a heart attack when she sees those awful curtains...and she hates carpet. I tried to persuade her to eat out but she insists on seeing her daughter's new living conditions.'
'I don't like the sound of your mother already.' He declared and he received a dirty look in return.
'I'm not looking forward to this meeting either, Boy Wonder. You've got a lot to catch up on, Draco was...actually is perfect. Mother will most likely criticise you non-stop and Father's a very intelligent man, so be warned, be on your best behaviour!'
'Alright.' Grumbled Harry. 'I can't guarantee that the Weasleys will be though! I suppose we better get started on making lunch?'
'It's okay, I hired a caterer.' Pansy said then she wrinkled her nose. 'In the meantime, go get a shower. You stink.'
oOo
Designer Clothing Store, London
Hermione had never tried on and bought so many different clothes in two hours. Draco called his personal chauffeur to take them into the city and he made a lot of calls during the entire journey. Apparently, he had commanded the designer clothing stores in advance to close for a while so that they could browse in privacy. She wondered how much he paid them because they eagerly pulled the doors open for their arrival and didn't protest when Draco pulled random pieces of clothing of the rails and threw it into their arms. Hermione drew the line when Draco tried to enter the female changing rooms with her.
'Dear,' she stressed, she glanced at the confused assistants beside them and she shot him a quick dangerous look, 'I'm not comfortable with you coming in with me.'
'Don't be silly, I'm your husband.' Draco said.
'No! You're not coming in!' she protested.
Draco sighed, turned to the assistants holding her clothes and he shook his head, 'We're just got married two days ago you see. My new wife's a bit of a saint, we haven't had sex yet.'
'MALFOY!'
'Yes dear?' he asked innocently.
'You bring in the clothes!' Hermione gave up and stormed into the changing rooms.
Draco was grinning when he followed her, his arms piled with different items of clothing. Hermione waited until they were at the furthest end of the changing rooms before she whispered furiously at him.
'What were you playing at!'
'You're not very good at this role-playing thing are you?' he smirked, he dropped the pile onto a red armchair.
'You didn't need to go that far.' She hissed, wringing her hands. What were people going to think? Her new husband was a horny bastard!
'They wouldn't believe us if we didn't go that far.' He said simply. 'Do you want your research group to fall?'
She sighed loudly and grabbed the dress off the armchair; she chose a cubicle and pulled the curtain across.
'Next!' he called.
'I haven't even tried it on yet!' Hermione frowned, she had only just taken off her shoes.
'It doesn't suit you.'
'I haven't even tried it on yet, Malfoy!' she repeated slowly.
'Don't bother, it makes your boobs look small.' He said crudely.
Hermione ignored him and tried it on anyway, she turned to her side and examined herself in the mirror...and he was right, she did look rather flat chested.
'I told you so.' He called as he interpretated her silence . 'Now try this.'
His pale hand thrust through the curtain, holding a fitted black dress with white lace. She took it reproachfully.
'Much better.' He nodded in approval as she stepped out. 'Now give me a twirl.'
Hermione felt stupid as she spun round with her arms out.
'Good girl.' He said like one would say to a dog. 'Do you like it?'
'It's alright. It's a bit tight under my bust.' Hermione said, but she secretly adored the dress, it was so pretty.
'It makes your boobs look great.'
At first, his crude compliments and rude remarks made her blush or feel extremely awkward but she decided that the sooner she tried them on without a fight, the sooner they leave the shop. He bought her some very fancy clothes for everyday wear and also bought her clothes for casual wear inside the house that she would normally wear going out. He even forced her to choose lingerie and she stuck to the white colour scheme.
'Before we leave, we need to sort a few issues out.' He said.
'For example?' she waited for him to elaborate, she was wearing the black and white lacy dress that accentuated her bust.
'You can't call me Malfoy anymore, that gives it away and as much as I hate to do this but I give you my permission to call me by my first name.'
'Your permission?' Hermione snorted.
'Think of this as a business proposal. I help you, you help me.'
'Okay okay.' Hermione exhaled deeply. 'What else?'
Draco stepped towards her and his hands reached forward and buried themselves into her long hair. He was gazing into her eyes and she stared back.
'This.' He whispered.
oOo
Harry and Pansy's bungalow, Bangor
Harry felt ridiculous.
After having a quick shower, he walked into the bedroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and found some black dress pants and a stiff white shirt with an emerald green tie lying on top of the covers on the bed. Pansy left him a note on top too, in her neat writing it said: 'Wear this or else'. He grudgingly put them on, he was still too tired from the lack of sleep and he couldn't be bothered fighting with her. He felt stupid wearing something this formal in his own house. He was about to make a knot in his tie when Pansy floated into the bedroom wearing a deep pink and purple floral dress; looking as immaculate as ever.
'Very nice, the tie compliments your eyes.' She murmured in approval. 'Let me help you with that.'
Her long fingers deftly tied a perfect Windsor knot under his collar. She also went to the dresser and added a small dollop of gel into her hands and she skilfully tamed his dark hair before pulling a box out of one of the carrier bags, removed the bottle of cologne from its case and dabbed a few spots to his neck and shirt. Pansy stood back and admired her handiwork.
'I look and smell like a male prostitute.' He complained.
'Well you'll definitely get a lot of customers.' She agreed. 'Now, remember, call my mother 'Madam' and my father 'Sir'.'
Harry was about to open his mouth to protest when the doorbell rang loudly, Pansy's face broke into a smile and she grabbed his upper arm.
'Let's go meet my parents!'
'Oh joy.' Replied Harry dully.
'Father.' His wife greeted a tall, tanned man with cropped dark hair with a kiss on the cheek and she turned to the handsome woman standing beside him, Pansy kissed her mother as well. 'Mother, I'm so glad to see you again.'
'Pansy dear, you look as lovely asever, doesn't she, Sylvester?' the woman said. Harry was shocked to see a smile on her haughty handsome face.
'Indeed.' Rumbled her father.
'Thank you.' beamed Pansy and she looked up and down her mother. 'You're wearing one of my designs!'
'I only wear the best.' replied her mother with so much confidence in her voice, she obviously thought it was true.
Pansy let go of her hand and stepped back beside Harry who stood silently during this entire family reunion meeting. Her father's eyes lazily drifted over to his new son-in-law as if noticing him for the first time in his house.
'You must be Mr Harry Potter.'
'Pleasure to meet you.' said Harry brazenly, not letting some man intimidate him. Pansy nudged him hard in the ribs and Harry coughed out the extra, 'Sir!'
Before she could dig him in the side again, he nodded at his mother-in-law and said politely, 'And you too, Madam.'
'Follow me into the living room,' Pansy said to her parents, 'and Harry will take your coats.'
'I will?' repeated Harry.
'Yes.' She confirmed through gritted teeth, she took their coats and pushed it into Harry's arms before turning back. 'Would you like something to drink? Father, I bought your favourite wine.'
She deliberately barged into Harry when she walked back into the hallway, and she helped him thread the arms of her mother's fur coat into the coat hanger.
'Why didn't you tell me your basic etiquettes were so shit?' she hissed. 'If I had known, I would have made you do a dress rehearsal this morning!'
'Well no one told me your parents were such stuck up pricks!' he angrily muttered back.
Pansy finished hanging her father's coat and she turned him around and pushed him towards the living room.
'We'll discuss this later! I'm going to sort out the drinks and appetizers? Where are the Weasleys? Never mind I'll find out! In the mean time, go make yourself look good to my parents.'
She marched straight into the kitchen and Harry eyed the open living room door, he could hear the rumble of her father's deep voice and suddenly his stomach was uneasy.
oOo
Designer Clothing Store, London
As soon as the words 'This' left his lips, his hands quickly started moving and he mussed up her hair, piling it on top of her head and twisting it when his fingers, it left her looking as if she had been-
'You look like you've been shagged.' Draco said, satisfied, his hand reached out and unpopped the first couple of buttons on the front of her dress, exposing the swells of her breasts.
'Do you mind?' she demanded, she reached to fix the buttons but he slapped her hand away, he pulled out a lipstick from his pocket and gave it to her.
'Apply it.' He ordered.
'Where did you get this?' she asked, she took off the cap and painted her pouted lips carefully in the mirror.
'From the counter. Now look at me.' He answered shortly. When she turned round to face him, his large thumb smeared her lips. He cut off her when she began to protest. 'Now kiss me.'
'WHAT!' she hissed, pulling her face away from his hand.
'Role-play.' He reminded her, he pointed to his lips. 'Right here. Mind you, I don't want to do this either. The sooner they think we're in love, they sooner they'll become bored and leave us alone.'
Hermione pulled a face, she really didn't want to do this. He looked away and she leaned in and gave him a quite peck on the lips; it immediately stained his lips dark pink.
'Now here.' He pointed to the edge of his mouth.
'What?'
'Just do it, Granger.'
'First name?'
'Kiss me already, Hermione! For fuck's sake.'
He made her add a few more to his cheek and a couple scattered over his neck for effect. When he was satisfied with his look in the full-length mirror, he roughened up his blonde hair and grabbed her hand, they both flinched when their palms made contact.
'This feels wrong.' She mumbled.
'It is wrong.' He agreed and dragged her out of the cubicle.
Their appearances must have looked pretty convincing for all the assistants gasped simultaneously, Draco pulled Hermione to the counter to pay for their purchases and have them deliver it to the Manor.
'Erm...excuse me, miss, your...' trailed off the young woman, she pointed at Hermione's open collar.
'Oh...' blushed Hermione, and she immediately buttoned up her dress.
'Stop staring ladies.' Said Draco and then his trademark smirked slowly crept onto his lips. 'Yes...I got her bucked!'
'Mal-DRACO!' Hermione punched him on the arm. She pulled his credit card out of the reader when the transaction was complete and she dragged him towards the doors; blushing furiously.
'Your receipt, sir!'
'Did you hear, Hermione dear? My receipt!'
'You don't need it.' She grumbled.
'My wife says I don't need it! I think she's annoyed with me for that crude comment. I better make things better.' Draco called when Hermione reached the door handle and just before, she opened the door and pulled him through he yelled mischievously: 'Fine fine! We finally consummated our marriage in your shop!'
oOo
Harry and Pansy's bungalow, Bangor
Harry sat on his favourite armchair uncomfortably as the two Parkinsons, his father-in-law and his mother-in-law, sat opposite on the sofa watching his every move. Harry cleared his throat and smile awkwardly, they had been sitting in silence for the past ten minutes, he glanced at the clock on the mantelpiece again, Pansy clearly wasn't returning until he redeemed himself.
'So-' he began to break the ice.
'So why do you think you're good enough for our daughter?' asked the mother icily.
'Selma, let's not frighten the poor boy.' murmured the father, Harry flinched at the 'poor boy' part and he felt anger boil inside him; he was a man! Sylvester cleared his throat and clasped his hands together, he bore his dark eyes steadily into Harry's which he returned back just as boldly.
'I find your manners a trifle...lacking...you've yet to prove me you're a capable man. Tell me, have you ever done anything impressive or worth mentioning in your entire life?' Sylvester asked slowly, his tone was rude and Harry found his patronising attitude very offensive.
'Very good question, sir,' replied Harry, he paused and mocked thinking deeply then he snapped his fingers. 'Ah yes...I DEFEATED VOLDEMORT, IS THAT IMPRESSIVE ENOUGH FOR YOU?'
'Adequate.' shrugged Selma.
Harry let his jaw drop, he was completely gobsmacked.
'Do you even know who Voldemort is?' he asked in disbelief.
'Harry, stop terrorizing my parents and being rude! The Weasleys just arrived.' Pansy chided as she walked into the living room and a familiar pair followed behind her, she handed her parents their drinks.
'Mr Weasley, Mrs Weasley.' greeted Harry with relief, he leaned in to kiss the woman on the cheek and he shook her husband's hand.
'Good to see you, Harry, thank you for inviting us for dinner.' smiled Mrs Weasley and she thanked Pansy when she took their coats from them.
'May I introduce Pansy's parents? Sylvester and Selma Parkinson.'
'Respect! I prefer you to address me as 'Sir' and my wife as 'Madam', boy!' boomed Sylvester.
At that point, Harry seriously considered telling him to stick his wand up where the sun never shines but he held back, he was not going to be rude in front of his own surrogate parents.
Lunch proceeded with no arguments or any disagreements, Pansy was the perfect host, she ensured her parents were well attended to and they chatted normally to her daughter (ignoring their son-in-law successively) and she got on surprisingly well with the Weasleys; particularly with Mrs Weasley as Pansy praised and idolised the older woman of her talent at knitting.
'I saw some of the pieces you knitted for Harry for those Christmases during Hogwarts. Your technique is really fantastic! I would love it if you could give me a few tips for my own designs?' enthused Pansy.
'A lovely sweet girl you've raised, Mrs Parkinson.' Praised Mrs Weasley to the other woman. The mother-in-law managed a smile and Mrs Weasley gave his designer wife a few trade secrets.
'Mr Weasley.' Whispered Harry as soon as Sylvester's attention was directed towards his wife, they were muttering about something so Harry used this opportunity to ask his surrogate father if he had any news about Hermione.
'I haven't heard from her but she told Ginny she was fine. Why don't you owl her?'
'I already have, over ten times now since yesterday, I think she's still mad about me accusing her of cheating.'
'Maybe she just needs to calm down, you know what her temper's like.'
'I-'
'Harry, can you pass me the bowl of haricot verts?' asked Pansy sweetly.
Harry sighed and adjusted his tie, it wasn't tie tightly but it still felt like his airway was restricted and he felt like he was choking. He saw that Sylvester gave him a dirty look, he looked to the Weasleys for support but they were both charmed by his new wife.
Could he do this for one year? This was one question he kept asking himself.
oOo
'This is a nice restaurant.' commented Hermione. Her hair was smooth again, they both fixed their appearances as soon as they climbed into their private car. She swirled her white wine around the crystal glass and took a sip of the sweet, refreshing liquid.
Draco matched her action and drank deeply from his large glass of red wine. They were sitting outside on the decking as it was beautiful crisp day but they were not alone. A waiter appeared with their appetizers on delicate china-ware and just when the man started serving them, Draco opened his mouth to speak.
'I've booked the next two weeks off work for the honeymoon I planned for...' he paused and looked meaningfully at her and Hermione nodded quietly as she sipped her wine again, 'for you. We're going to Japan, I got a nice little cottage near the mountains springs there.'
'That's nice.' She murmured, she sat back to let the waiter lay her napkin across her lap. When the man left, she looked at her husband who pulled the prawn cocktail towards him. 'Are we actually going?'
'We might as well, adds to the little drama we're doing.' He said, he speared the juicy prawns onto the fork and lifted the fork to her mouth.
'I don't like prawns.'
'Tough crap, eat it.'
'You made me change my wardrobe but you can't force me to eat something I don't like!' she hissed lowly, she grabbed her own starter which was chicken Caesar salad.
Draco suddenly stepped on her foot hard and when she opened her mouth in a perfect 'O' in shock, he fed the fork into her mouth and pushed up, letting the prawns slip off the cutlery.
'I 'ate oo.' She tried to say darkly, she swallowed the seafood and pulled a face. 'I hate you.'
'I never asked to be fed spicy foods and be made to drink vinegar either!' he countered.
Hermione shrugged. They sat in silence after; there was just the sound of chatter from the people around them and the clatter of plates, glasses and cutlery. He finished his seafood cocktail first and watched her finish her appetizer.
'What do you think those two are up to?' Hermione wondered aloud.
'I hope Pansy's giving him hell. Thank god we need a PortKey to get over to Northern Ireland, otherwise this world would have been short of a certain Scarhead this morning if I could apparate there .' Said Draco quite seriously.
'Why?' she demanded.
'I'm guessing the Ministry put that "sleeping in the same bed" rule on them too, the thought of him in bed with my woman makes my blood boil.' Draco murmured quietly but he couldn't quite keep the angry out of his voice.
'I'm sure Harry feels the same.' Hermione said defensively.
'Has he contacted you since yesterday?' asked Draco slyly.
'No...he hasn't actually.'
Hermione had just realised that she hadn't heard from him since she walked out of the hospital and this sudden realisation hurt her. Yes, she was very angry with him for accusing her for being unfaithful but she still would have forgiven him if he grovelled or persisted with his apologies.
'Maybe he doesn't want a psycho like you.' Her blonde husband said nastily.
'That's not true!' Hermione said, but she wasn't confident then she narrowed her eyes. 'How do you know he hadn't contacted me?'
'A guess.' Shrugged Draco. 'I didn't see you receive any owls since I got back to the Manor from St Mungos.'
'Did you see him leave the hospital?'
'No, your precious Scarhead thought it would be funny to have the Healer knock me cold for a few good hours.'
'Do you know the name of the Healer? I want to send them flowers!'
'Yes, I think their initials were F Y.' Said Draco sarcastically. 'For "Fuck You".'
oOo
A/N
I would like to make a very important point! I mentioned it the last chapter that a reader was unsure of my plans for this story...THIS REVIEW WAS NOT A FLAME!
I feel like I needed to say this because I feel really bad for making it sound like that when the reader made a very good point! I'm sure some of you felt the same way as they did!
Hopefully I haven't teased you that much between the so-called 'flirting' between Hermione and Draco. I'm sorry guys but they aren't really flirting and yes, you've got it! They still really hate each other. In this chapter, hopefully, you can see that the roles seems reversed now. In this chapter, I was trying to make you see that now Draco and Hermione seem like the couple who are most likely to fall in love first compared to Harry and Pansy who are very tense in this chapter!
YOUR REVIEW RESPONSES ARE IMMENSE! I did not expect almost 10 extra reviews!
Next Chapter:
Harry isn't pleased to read the newspaper this morning- what were they doing?
Hermione is a little upset...why hasn't Harry contacted her yet?
Pansy meets Harry's friends for the first time...and Harry meets up with super sexy hunk, Bernando again!
Draco's been a very bad boy!
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK GUYS AND
PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW
