Title: Causal Fallacy (9/?)
Author: Maggiemerc
Rating: M
Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I did there'd be a lot more lesbian sex on the show.
Pairings: Callie/Arizona, Owen/Cristina, Meredith/Derek, Amelia/Lexie, etc, etc.
Summary: Sometimes there is no link between cause and effect. Sometimes it is just the natural world bearing down on you and devastating everything in its path. A sequel to the Alternate Universe episode, "If/Then" and Another Statement of Causality. Callie and Arizona are at a loss with how to make a relationship work with three kids and Cristina and Owen are blindly moving forward damned the costs.
Chapter Nine
She had babbled. Something about nerves, painkillers and her father all conflating into a big babbling episode where she'd revealed that she'd slept with someone while still married to Owen and then they'd broken up but they were back together since the crash and she was happy.
She'd made the mistake of looking up and seeing Arizona out in the hallway teasing Owen and she must have smiled because her father turned and realized that the object of her affection was just outside the room.
But as he thought she was still straight and as Mark Sloan was standing there oozing sexual confidence that must have been created in a lab her dad naturally thought he was the person sleeping with his baby girl.
The only good thing that came from the misunderstanding was the joy of seeing Mark Sloan spin on his heel and take off like an Olympic runner while the other three doctors, her father and two nurses watched.
He would never live that one down and she strongly suspected that she'd cling to the image until her dying day.
Arizona, trying to be that awesome girlfriend she claimed to be, had intercepted her father and turned him back towards Callie's room. As he didn't look like his earth had been shattered Callie assumed Arizona hadn't revealed anything too salacious during her interception.
She heard her father ask about Arizona's arm as they reentered the room.
"I was in the plane," she said succinctly.
"She saved my life," Callie added and shot Arizona a chastising look over her dad's shoulder. The woman had kept her warm, kept her hydrated and rescued her emotionally in a fashion Callie struggled to put into words.
Before Callie had harbored confusion over Arizona. How they'd fallen for one another and how easily Arizona had ended it. But after those long hours huddled in the shade of the wreckage Callie had managed to make sense of it, and of Arizona.
The woman had a streak of self-loathing buried deep inside that was virtually crippling.
Her father turned to look at Arizona with something that approached awe. "Thank you," he said. His voice didn't crack, because he was Carlos Torres but for an instant Callie thought it might.
Arizona smiled dreamily. "I'm just glad she's alive," she said softly. She was looking directly at Callie when she said it. Looking at her like they were—were married.
Her dad didn't catch it.
Arizona excused herself before all their longing looks could give them away. But she didn't really excuse herself. She just went back out to the nurse's station and took up residence on the computer there.
"I'm glad you have friends like her," her father mused, "she actually cares about you. Unlike that 'man' you married." She could hear the quotes around the word man. Her father didn't even need air quotes.
"Daddy," she didn't really need to hear it. Her leg was starting to ache and she was feeling exhausted after a long day of being in pain…and being exhausted.
"You haven't mentioned her before. Is your friendship…new?"
What he meant was were they like the characters of Speed and only bonding because of a trauma. "We've known each other a while. But she was there when things with Owen started to not work."
By "there" she meant Arizona was in the middle of it doing her version of a sexy dance. Which was really just her being dashing and perfect all the time.
Oh wow. She just said sexy dance.
Her eyes wandered. Arizona was leaning in and perusing the screen. She squinted a little when she read and her lips pursed together like she was sucking on something sour.
"Good. I'm glad you had someone. Unlike these men you're seeing. Owen was bad enough, but that Mark Sloan didn't even try to fight."
"He's a surgeon Daddy. We have million dollar hands. We're not supposed to use them to deflect your punches."
Arizona glanced up. Saw Callie. With her good hand she pointed at Callie's dad and mouthed, "Pay attention."
Her father was studying her. "They have you on medication?"
"A lot of it."
He came closer. "Have you slept?" Before she could answer her dad started to crawl into bed with her. With all the wires and tubes it was like an unsexy version of that movie with Catherine Zeta Jones' butt going under all the lasers. Ew. She'd just used her dad's awkward encroaching on her space to bring up the mental image of Catherine Zeta Jones's ass.
And now it was Arizona's ass and she was turning and winking…
"Daddy! What are you doing?"
"You always liked it when I'd hold you when you were sick."
She feebly pushed on him. "You also weren't a grandparent."
"I'm worried Mija and I can't do anything but sit in this bed and hold you until you feel better."
It was so sweet. She had to smile. "I know, but I've got a reputation as a surgeon who doesn't cuddle with her dad when she's sick."
Oh that was the wrong choice. Her father frowned. "Your reputation as a surgeon? You'd put that ahead of your own comfort?"
It was like that time she told him he couldn't come see her presentation in college because no one else had parents coming. He showed up and then clapped.
"Daddy…"
He hopped off the bed. Opened his mouth to say something but thought better of it. "You know this is not just for you?"
"I know."
"I get a call from her saying you've been hurt. That there was a plane crash? My only daughter nearly died Calliope. So I really don't care about your reputation right now."
He did not, however, get back into bed with her. Instead he walked over the couch beneath the window and started dragging it back towards her bed. The noise of the metal tipped legs on tile was painfully loud.
When it was close enough he took a seat that required perching precariously on the edge of the cushion and took her hand. "You're my child." He reached up and gently touched her cheek. "I nearly lost you."
"But I'm okay."
"You're not okay. You're in a bed and your leg is in that contraption. You were giggling right now because of the medication."
"But I've got people."
She didn't want to risk turning to look into the hallway but she knew Arizona was there.
"Sure you have people. You have a husband that cheated, that mother of his and that man who just ran from me."
"And Arizona."
"But she's not family Mija."
It startled her how much that bothered her. Both his assumption and the knowledge that it was true, and that it still felt true.
Speak of the devil. Arizona appeared at the door, and judging by her bashful look she'd heard at least a little of their conversation. "Mr. Torres? I was just head home and…"
She looked from Callie to her father, who still sat patiently at her bedside.
"I was wondering if you needed a ride somewhere?"
"Thank you but I'll be staying here."
Callie shot Arizona a panicked look that she really hoped her dad didn't catch.
Arizona stepped further into the room, "That's fine, but I know your grandchildren would love to see you. I was actually going to go take some groceries by."
She was?
"Owen hasn't had a chance," she explained.
"Owen. He's staying at your home?"
Callie hadn't actually known where Owen was staying. He'd brought the kids by that morning but she'd been too groggy to do much more than a feeble one armed hug. Which sent all three into a cascade of tears. She'd just assumed her former mother in law would have been helping.
But Arizona seemed to know. "He thought it'd be better that he stay with the kids. His mom's place is apparently too small for five people long term."
That was the truth.
"You should go Daddy. I know they'd love to see you."
Arizona wisely didn't say anything. Just stood there patiently waiting for his response. Her father looked from one woman to the other. "I suppose. And your mother will want a report as well. I'll need her to send me more clothes too."
She glanced over at his carryon bag. For her dad the bag could last a week easily. Which meant…
"You're staying."
"Of course. I'm not leaving until you're walking."
Arizona winced sympathetically.
####
Due to her arm being in a sling. Arizona was on desk duty for at least three weeks. She was also off her bike. She briefly thought about just riding one handed but her crash months earlier came to mind. So while Mr. Torres said goodbye to his exhausted daughter she snuck over to Addison's room where Mark and his daughter were holding vigil.
"How's she doing?"
"Stats are strong."
She glanced down at Mark's daughter then ran her hand over the girl's soft hair. She didn't even stir—perfectly at ease amongst the beeps and whooshes of Addison's hospital room.
"Carlos Torres has decided you're unfit to date his daughter."
"Wait until he finds out I'm cheating on her with my comatose fiancee."
She squeezed his shoulder. Addison hadn't woken up since her surgery in Boise. The scans showed some measure of brain activity. She just…hadn't woken up. Mark had been dealing with it by acting like nothing was the matter and so far they'd all let him.
"I offered to drive him over to Callie's."
He looked up at her suspiciously, "Trying to get in with the in-laws."
"The man wanted to murder you and Owen. I want him to like me before he finds out I'm dating his daughter."
"Are you?"
"Sure."
"You're not just feeling all hung up on her because you two nearly died?"
"What like in Speed?"
He blinked.
She explained, "They only got together because they were on the bus. Then Keanu didn't want to come back for a sequel so she hooked up with Jason Patric and they rode around on a boat wondering if their relationship could be built on anything but adrenaline."
He blinked again.
"It wasn't very good."
"I was referring to the fact that you like to be her protector and then dump her when she doesn't need it any more."
"It's…it's not like that." It couldn't be like that. Not after their time up on that mountain. Not after the last few days at the hospital. She waved her hand, "Oh whatever. Give me your car keys."
For some reason that caused Mark to protectively clutch his daughter to his chest. "Why?"
"Because I'm not putting Callie's dad on my handlebars!"
He juggled his daughter and pulled the keys out of his coat pocket. "Have it home before midnight."
She rolled her eyes. "Right. I'm stopping by the store too. Do I need to get formula or anything?"
"Nah. The nursery here has it covered."
She was about to lecture him about stealing formula from the nursery, but the sight of Addison laid out peacefully in the hospital bed stopped her.
"I better go find Mr. Torres before he tackles some unsuspecting man that looks like you." She gave him a quick kiss on the top of his head and stepped back out into the hallway where Mr. Torres was walking towards her. She quickened her own footsteps and turned him around gently by the arm.
"I've got keys and a list. Did you say goodbye to Callie?"
He nodded back towards Addison's room. "Yes. Is your friend all right?"
She chanced a look back herself, "Not yet. She was in the crash too."
That was all she needed to say apparently because Mr. Torres was very respectful and didn't ask more or attempt to awkwardly make Arizona feel better.
####
Cristina found that dealing with kids outside of the OR wasn't so bad when she knew she could leave them with someone else at the end of the day. She was a cool aunt kind of figure who treated them like adults and they responded with delight. She didn't have to parent or punish or even really feed them. Just make sure that none of them fell down the stairs or murdered each other with kitchen knives.
It still wasn't necessarily ideal. She preferred not having to deal with kids at all, but the bonus of seeing Owen genuinely happy almost outweighed the hassle of his three children existing.
Almost.
She was alone in the kitchen enjoying the peace and quiet and consuming the very last of one of the kid's brightly colored cereals when the front door opened.
"Hello!" Robbins: back to continue to insinuate herself into things so that when Callie was out of the hospital they'd go back to being…whatever they were.
"In the kitchen," she shouted back.
They'd reached an…understanding in the last day. It had only really taken a look. Being so close to Owen and Callie respectively they'd found themselves wrapped up in a drama not entirely of their own making. Also Owen had mentioned that Arizona initially left Callie because of the kids factor. So she didn't feel quite as bad complaining about them to Robbins.
She huffed her way into the kitchen with a bag overflowing with groceries. Cristina held up the cereal box. "Hope you got more of this marshmallow junk because the last half of this box is accidentally getting eaten as we speak."
"I did, but—"
She looked almost panicked and when Cristina looked behind her she saw a little bald man juggling a suitcase, two more bags of groceries and the door.
"Who," she mouthed.
"Callie's dad," Robbins mouthed back.
The man finally made it into the kitchen where, up close he was anything but little. Sure he was a little short compared to his daughter but he exuded a strength that Cristina might have found attractive ten years before.
He noticed her as he was setting the bags down and glanced at Arizona curiously before holding out a hand. "Carlos Torres. And you are?"
She opened her mouth to say something involving her name and her relationship to Owen but Robbins moved in like a cat and interrupted her, "Cristina Yang. She's a friend of the family's too."
He looked over at her, "Your friends with Calliope."
One. Hilarious name. Two. When was she ever friends with Callie? "Actually I'm—"
"She's a resident under Callie. They're close. Because of the heart surgeries. She's kind of her…protege."
Three. What. The. Hell.
####
She managed to get Carlos out of the kitchen before he could press the already irritated Yang into blowing both their covers. He picked up his bag and went upstairs to claim the guest bedroom.
She immediately spun on Yang whose patience had disappeared. "Any reason you're playing Three's Company with that guy's head?"
"He nearly took out Owen and Mark today to defend Callie. He cannot know we are girlfriends of either of them."
She gave Arizona a dubious look, "You I can get. You're wanting to sleep with his daughter. Why on earth would I go along?"
"Because when I say took out I mean punched. In the face. He probably doesn't hit women but I really don't want to find out and if he knows your the slut that stole Owen away from his wife—"
"Says the woman getting into jealous fights with him at parties—"
"Right now we've got a shellshocked Owen, three kids and Callie in the hospital. We do not need the drama him knowing about us would bring."
Yang still looked suspicious. She understood that. She'd had enough lesbian drama to last a life time and what she was doing with Carlos Torres was precisely the kind of thing she normally actively avoided.
But you changed for people you loved.
Carlos slipped back into the kitchen like a ninja and both women startled back with a yelp that surprised him as much as they had been surprised.
"I—was just going to ask where the children were?"
Valid. She looked to Cristina for an answer.
"Owen took them out for dinner." She or Owen couldn't have made dinner? "Because I don't cook."
"You weren't hungry too," Carlos asked.
He must not have seen the cereal box Cristina had demolished. "Oh I was," she said honestly, "I just don't do cozy out to dinner meals with kids."
Arizona closed her eyes. Of all the things Cristina Yang, MD, PhD could say…
But Carlos laughed, "You sound like my wife. Any chance she'd get she'd send me off with the girls so she could have 'alone time' with a bottle of wine."
Cristina picked up the box and shook it. The last few pieces of cereal made a sad little sound. "I'm a cereal woman myself."
Carlos clapped his hands together. "What say I make you two ladies a drink."
Arizona didn't want to drink. She wanted to go back to the hospital and stay up with Callie who she knew was having trouble sleeping. Or if that failed she wanted to go home and curl up in her own bed.
"You make cocktails," Cristina asked. Not impressed.
He grinned just like his daughter.
####
Owen came home to find his girlfriend, Arizona Robbins and his former father in law playing cards and drinking a lot of booze. Though somehow Cristina looked like she was the only one drunk. She waved exuberantly but Robbins tugged her down before she could stumble over and kiss him.
She smiled apologetically and nodded towards Carlos who was standing and instead of straightening his shirt and glaring at Owen like he was about to murder him, grinned and held out his hands to catch the three squealing children, only one of which actually knew why they were squealing.
Owen was pretty sure Gavin and Angus were too young to remember their grandfather's last visit. But he remembered them and swept all three up into his arms with a cheer.
The boys had a moment of confusion but when Allegra started chanting "grandpa" they caught on.
"Look at you three," he exclaimed, "Pretty soon you'll be carrying me!"
Allegra was eager to launch into all the things that had happened since she'd last seen her grandfather, and Gavin, who idolized his older sister, was happy to listen, but Angus soon wormed his way out of his grandfather's arms and strode over to the two women still seated around the coffee table.
He'd always been a little more clingy than his brother. And an outsider even though tradition dictated that the Allegra should have been. He got angry faster than his siblings and loved nothing more than curling up in his mother's arms.
Something which he wouldn't be doing anytime soon.
He approached Arizona and Cristina and stared at them cautiously. Arizona smiled back kindly like she often did with kids and Cristina looked over his head to mouth hello to Owen.
Angus made some decision internally and then carefully crawled into Arizona's lap. Though Owen and Arizona were currently operating under a truce while Callie was in the hospital he found that the way she curled her good arm around Angus protectively and held him close was more endearing than it should have been.
Almost maternal, a descriptor he knew she abhorred almost as much as Cristina. But she leaned in and quietly asked Angus how he was and he patted her face and said something about being good.
Allegra, meanwhile, was launching into a long tale about how everyone had sleepovers.
…
Shit! He darted over and pulled her out of Carlos's arms before she could go into details about her parents' sleepovers. Though Carlos had already caught on and was giving Owen a glare so cold it brought the temperature of the room down.
"I'm going to go take her up for a bath," he said in an attempt to avoid his former father-in-law's glare.
Allegra heard the word bath and immediately spiraled into a keening wail at the idea.
Everyone winced at the sound and Carlos looked like he was about to object and launch into a tirade on how unfit Owen was as a parent.
"Ice cream," Cristina shouted. Allegra's wails ceased and Gavin and Angus both suddenly grew very interested in what she had to say. "We've got some…for after baths." She looked around, "It's…delicious?"
"Yeah," Arizona jumped in, "ice cream for kids who take bathes!"
She tickled Angus when she said it and he squealed before rolling off her lap and rushing up the stairs. Much like his older sister, who kicked free of Owen and shot off like Mark had earlier in the day.
Owen was about to follow but Carlos, still holding Gavin, stopped him. "I've got it. Why don't you take a load off Owen."
He slumped onto the couch behind Robbins who surreptitiously sipped her cocktail.
"He really hates you," Cristina drunkenly observed.
"He doesn't—we're very—"
"Really hates you," Arizona added. Though she wasn't drunk, just doing that jokey tone of hers.
"No. He's really nice."
"As long as he thinks we're just friends of the family," Cristina said. "I mean, I'm not saying he'd get violent with Robbins or I, but I'm also saying I don't want to find out."
"He wouldn't get violent." Sure he could be protective of his daughter but she made him sound like he was always a hair's breadth away from Hulking out on the nearest person.
"No," Robbins agreed, "but I deal with enough scary authority figures in my own life. I don't need to add any to the mix." With that she tried to push herself up and away from the coffee table. Owen shot a hand out to steady her.
"You okay to drive?"
She nodded. "Yeah, just not used to doing everything one handed."
Cristina laughed, "Lexie says you do plenty of things one handed."
"I do—" she realized what Cristina was intimating and scowled, "Gross Yang. Really gross."
She shrugged.
Arizona turned back to Owen and said softly, "I should probably head out." He winced and a look of dread immediately crossed her face as she knew what he was going to ask. "You want me to take her home don't you?"
"I can't," he said, "and she can't stay here because," he looked above their head.
"I…" She was failing to find a reason to avoid the trip. She moaned in frustration. "Damn it."
"I'd really appreciate it."
The both looked down at Cristina who was looking up at them. "You are two of the whitest people I've ever seen," she finally said.
"If she throws up in Mark's car you're telling him," Robbins said out the side of her mouth.
He squatted down and picked Cristina up. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Only her aim was off and her lips wetly smacked his eye.
"That's so romantic," Robbins said dryly. "Come on."
After he got Cristina into Sloan's SUV and made Robbins say at least three times that she'd text when they were both home safe he went back inside. In the interim all three kids had been bathed and were in their pajamas and robes eating ice cream. Carlos hovered over them looking much less like the intimidating business man he was accustomed to. The front of his shirt was wet with bathwater and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. He looked almost…paternal.
"Arizona and Cristina leave?"
"Yeah."
"Together?"
"Yes?"
He only said it like a question because Carlos was smiling like he knew a secret Owen did not. Had…had someone told him something? The kids? Cristina or Robbins?
"They're together aren't they?"
Owen blinked.
"It's okay. I've been to South Beach."
"Cristina and Robbins?"
"They were trying so hard to avoid each other and it's clear they're keeping a secret." He came around the table and put his hand on Owen's in comfort. "Just let them know okay? They can be themselves around me."
He smiled. His life was turning into a damned sitcom.
But at least now Robbins was sort of out.
