A/N: I do not own Death Note.

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Chapter 9 For Kicks

L paused in his wheeling Light down the hospital corridors when there was a sudden commotion in the hall ahead of them.

"Chief, you need to rest!" exclaimed Aizawa.

"My son needs me!"

"Dad!"

"Light!"

Both stumbled out of their wheelchairs and down the hall as fast as they could to meet each other halfway.

Like father, like son. L sighed as the nurses attempted to break up the touching father-son reunion. The detective left the wheelchair (and Light) in the care of one of the nurses and shuffled away—he felt he had no place in this family moment and he doubted his presence would be appreciated (not after what he had done.) Of course he would keep an eye on everything that was said and done on the monitors but honestly L needed some space to think… or maybe it would be more accurate to say 'not think,' to calm the swirling thoughts that had become tainted with emotion.

To his annoyance Rem followed him.

"Shouldn't you stay with Light?" L grumbled.

The Shinigami gazed down at him with those strangely emotive yellow feline eyes.

"I need to stay close to Light, but that's within a certain range—around a hundred meters. My appearance clearly disturbs his father and that would make Light unhappy. Neither of them deserves this."

But I do?

L locked eyes with the condemning stare of the Shinigami and then suddenly interested in the floor tiles.

Perhaps I do…

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L's foot again slammed into the punching bag. The chain creaked as the red bag swung back and forth from where it hung from the ceiling.

How could I be so wrong?

Not only was Light innocent but he had wasted so much time and they were back to square one!

I tortured an innocent and I have nothing to show for it.

Bam! L spun around and hit the bag again so hard that the bag nearly slammed into the ceiling.

Alright, that wasn't completely true—they now knew a bit more about Kira's powers—the scant bit of information they had been able to glean from talking with Light and Rem. But they were still no further in discovering Kira's identity.

I'm not worthy of my own title. L brooded as he swung around and kicked again. Light, why couldn't you have just been Kira?

"Watari said I'd find you here."

L startled and turned towards the doorway in shock (and nearly got hit by the bag as it swung back on the chain.) There was Light, standing tall and proud—even in that stupid papery hospital gown.

Light seemed to be putting up a grand show that he was alright. Indeed, he looked better than alright—the teen looked menacing even with the Shinigami looming protectively behind him. L recognized Light's actions immediately for what they were—an act meant to salvage his pride…

"Should you really be up and around?"

That he asked was probably equal parts concern and a petty desire to trample the younger man's pride. L couldn't help it—the haughty teen had so much of it…

He has no right to pretend nothing is wrong after what happened—after what I did to him!

"I've done enough sitting for a while, thanks," Light replied acerbically before he bowed and limped his way into the detective's makeshift dojo, his new cane tapping on the tiles as he walked. Light had managed to bargain with the nurses to let him make do with a cane instead of a wheelchair or a walker—his pride had been wounded far worse than his body and he was eager to begin the healing process. Light got around well enough by staying close to the walls and Rem was there to help him when he stumbled. Every step was agony but it was important to keep moving—of course Light knew from the outset that physical therapy wasn't going to be any fun but if he went easy on himself he'd never get better.

L winced guiltily and looked away. "How's your father?"

At the mere mention of his father Light's haughty act crumbled away. He stared at the floor, his bangs falling in his face, but the detective could tell from the teen's body language that he was obviously distressed.

Light had never meant to hurt him—he had only thought it was his own life he was gambling with—he never considered how his actions might hurt his father. That seemed impossible. His father was just… his father! The Chief of Police—stern, strong, and distant—as if anything could ever get to him! He had never even stopped to think about the stress he was putting his father through.

"Light…"

"The doctor says he'll be alright but he needs to rest."

"Oh?" L shifted awkwardly and in an idiosyncratic motion scratched the back of his left leg with the toenails of his other foot. "…That's good."

Light clenched his fists in anguish as he thought: Will he really rest though with Kira still out there? No. He'll work himself to death! "L… We really need to catch Kira!"

The detective gave him a blank look. "Yes Light-kun, I believe we've already decided that that would be the best course of action… and please call me Ryuuzaki."

"So what are we doing here, Ryuuzaki?"

"I'm… depressed."

"What? Depressed?"

What did L have to be depressed about? He wasn't the one that was left to rot in solitary confinement if anyone had a right to be depressed…

"Surely Light-kun can understand why…"

"Well, we're not going to catch Kira moping around here! Officers are still dying!"

"That's why I'm depressed. You see all this time I thought you were Kira…" L pouted. "I wanted y—" L abruptly stopped midsentence when he glanced back and was once again saw Rem hovering protectively behind Light and remembered the Shinigami's words "If you hurt him, I will kill you."

Crap…

L usually didn't bother to edit himself and just blurted out whatever was on his mind. He never really had to worry about other people's feelings before… Other people's feelings—that was one mystery that the great detective L shied away from and hadn't a clue how to solve.

"You wanted me to be Kira," Light finished his sentence for him and looked like he wanted to punch him for that.

He won't though, L grinned bitterly to himself, No doubt by the time he staggers over here he'll realize that I have my guard up. He saw what I did to that bag—and he must know he's in no condition for a physical altercation...

L seemed to dismiss the approaching teen and turned his attention back to the bag. He was getting ready to kick again when Light struck, sweeping L's feet out from under him with the cane. L yelped and fell backwards but the teen caught him (and somehow managed to avoid collapsing) before the detective could fall and hurt himself. The detective spun around and stopped himself just short of kicking Light in the jaw when he again was sent a dangerous glare from the Shinigami.

"What was that for?"

"I think you know why!"

"I didn't say it!" L snapped defensively.

Light's grip tightened around his shoulders and stared at him, eyes ablaze with righteous fury. L wasn't at all comfortable with that, or the physical contact.

"But you were going to! You want me to be Kira!"

"…Yes... No. Light I—I wanted you to be Kira, but I don't mean it the way you think!"

"What other way is there? You want me to be a mass-murderer!"

"No. I just… I wanted Light-kun… I assure you it's nothing personal!"

Light watched in shock as it appeared that the great detective actually seemed rather flustered. He didn't know that Rem's presence alone demanded that L explain himself—and that L never had to explain himself to anybody before and because this was all so screwed up, and Light made him feel so guilty, and he still had no leads, and this conversation wasn't making Light happy in any sense of the word...

"If anything I meant it as a compliment!"

"What? A… compliment?" Light was so shocked he let go of his death grip and L took the opportunity to get back some space as he continued his rambling:

"Light-kun… I wanted you to be Kira because I am childish like that, I hate losing, and I find you fascinating, Light-kun."

The teen scoffed "You only found me 'fascinating' because you thought I was Kira! I know my life is not that interesting," the teen smiled weakly.

"Light-kun is plenty fascinating anyway," the detective assured.

"I still fail to see how you wanting me to be Kira is supposed to be a compliment!"

"You don't understand. I like a challenge. Most criminals are depressingly stupid and most cases are distressingly easy. This is the most challenging case of my career. I had hoped it was you because not only then would I have a suspect but I had hoped to play against someone as brilliant as you."

Light gaped at detective. The teen was always being told how brilliant he was by everyone around him but being called brilliant by L? That was a whole different level—that was indeed a compliment. The detective smiled cutely as he watched how the lightest beginnings of a blush spread across the younger man's cheeks. However in that same sentence the detective had said something else that Light found irksome: "P-Play? This isn't a game, Ryuuzaki! People are dying!"

Like father, like son. L sighed again. How predictable—of course the Chief was an honorable man but being "honorable" wasn't what L needed to do to win…

Now if you were Kira you'd be more interesting... L sulked. If not for the damned Shinigami's meddling he probably wouldn't have had anything to do with this annoyingly idealistic teen…

"You only found me 'fascinating' because you thought I was Kira!"

Oh crap. He's right. I'm doomed.

"Of course, Light-kun. People are always dying. Surely you're Shinigami can tell you that everyone dies sometime whether we act or not. It's sheer arrogance to assume that you can change that."

The teen looked like he'd been slapped in the face but instead of storming off like L figured he would the teen only gritted his teeth and drew closer. A strange thrill went through the detective when the teen refused to back down.

"I might be arrogant but at least I'm still trying!"

You should have been my adversary. L looked away and Light could see the curvature of the detective's back, as if he carried the burden of the world on his shoulders.

Well he's L—the world's greatest detective—of course he does!

"I'm actually glad you're not Kira, Light-kun, because if you were Kira… you'd probably beat me."

Light looked very disturbed by the detective's words. "Don't talk like that! I'm not Kira! And you're L, aren't you? The man who's solved the world's toughest cases! You've answered some of the world's greatest mysteries!" Light again grabbed him by the shoulders and looked him right in the eye and insisted "No one could ever beat you!"

L stared disbelieving into the younger man's earnest face and remembered the Shinigami's words: "He loves you!" Well… L thought in wry amusement I have a fanboy in any case... The smile disappeared as quickly as it came because L knew firsthand how dangerous fanboys could be.

"I'm sorry, Light-kun… for everything. I'm sorry about… whatIdidtoyou and I'm sorry I'm not what you think I am. Light-kun, I don't do this because I think it will make any sort of difference. I solve cases—that's all. There's always another criminal—that will never change. This world is rotten and no one can ever hope to change that. No... I only solve cases because I'm bored."

It was a long shot but the detective figured if he could attack the boy's obvious idealism maybe he could make Light become… disinterested in him then perhaps he would be absolved of any responsibility for the troubled teen because clearly making Light happy would be impossible…

Instead Light only recognized his own despair. L said he was depressed… he's still upset about… Oh no, I've been so selfish!

"Ryuuzaki… you know I don't blame you, right? I think you just did what you thought you had to do. I forgive you."

The detective looked at the teen, aghast. "Light-kun… Why can't you just be a bastard?" Not only does he turn out innocent but he has to act like a freaking saint! It made L look and feel like a bully. "Really, what is WRONG with you?"

"Excuse me?"

"I kept you locked up! Get angry, hit me, yell at me, something! Just don't say—"

"But… I meant it!" Of course he did, that's what made it so infuriating. "You just made a mistake!" the teen insisted.

"L doesn't make mistakes!"

Light rolled his eyes. "Now who's being arrogant? You're human, aren't you? Even I realized I fit the profile perfectly. If I was in your position even I would have suspected me…"

"Don't… I'm not supposed to make mistakes! I'm not worthy of my title!" In a rare show of emotion the normally stoical detective growled and slammed the ball of his foot into the bag again.

"Your… title?"

L sighed "I suppose there's no harm in telling you—even if you are working with Kira then you and your Shinigami friend may know even if you kill me—that there will always be an L. L is a title, an idea, not a person."

"But YOU are a person."

L noticed the hand on his shoulder and the look of concern. Stockholm syndrome—that had to be it. How else could the teen he had kept imprisoned become so… attached to him so fast?

L locked eyes with Rem as he informed them. "I am expendable, I always have been. Hypothetically if you were Kira and were to have me killed all that would happen was the next L would arrest you…"

"That again? Dammit, Ryuuzaki! Stop talking about dying! You're not going to die now and I'm not Kira—get that through your head! Look, I see where you're coming from. I know you're depressed and I know you're upset about being wrong but so what? You just made a mistake! It can happen to anyone! No one's going to make you fall on your sword! You know why? Because you're not expendable! I don't care what you or anyone says—you are irreplaceable!"

"Light-kun…"

The detective's throat went dry as the younger man who should by all rights hate him argued so passionately on his behalf.

"That's not true, I—"

"I don't care how many other Ls there are! They'd suck! They wouldn't be you. Ryuuzaki, the taskforce needs you; I need you… to solve this case."

"We don't even have a suspect…"

"Then we'd better get to work, right? It's just a setback, nothing more. I know you can do it. We can do it! We will do it!"

So infuriating! To L, Light was an annoying, boundless fount of optimism and he seemed incapable of realizing when everything's gone to hell. Still L didn't dare to take his anger out on the teen so he took it out on the bag and this time the bag did hit the ceiling.

The teen watched wide-eyed. "That's—that's really impressive, Ryuuzaki. What style is that?"

"Capoeira. It's a form of Brazilian martial arts."

"Cool!"

L fidgeted awkwardly as the teen continued to make impressed noises.

"C-could you maybe teach me?"

L sent the teen another blank look. "Why would Light-kun need it? He has a Shinigami to take care of him."

Light had wanted to learn some form of self-defense ever since that night in the alley when he almost died but he never seemed to have time...

"Please?"

"…Light-kun should take it easy until he's recovered…" L began but saw that the teen had already set his cane aside. He was able to (weakly) stand on his own and was already trying to copy his moves.

L sighed. Just what I need. Another B.

No, L amended, this wasn't the same. B developed his obsession because he believed L spurned him. L didn't exactly have that option with Light. He found he didn't exactly want to either—though L found the teen to be a bit irritating he wasn't exactly repulsive in fact L found he enjoyed arguing with him—watching that perfect mask slip and Light get all ruffled, it was a delightful experience—like finding the cream filling in the center of a delicious treat. It's just that L wasn't supposed to have such emotional weaknesses and the idea of having a… relationship of any sort with anyone was… strange to the detective.

"No! Stand like this…" L rationalized that if Light was so eager to learn it than he best learn it correctly, that's all. "Like this!" L insisted as he moved up behind him and put his hands on the teen's hips adjusting his stance. The detective swallowed hard when he realized, awkwardly, that all that stood between his hands and the teen's bare skin was that thin, papery hospital gown. Dammit, didn't he send the taskforce to retrieve Light's personal effects? Where the hell were they?

Meanwhile Light, still weakened from his ordeal, tried to copy L's move—his foot hit the bag… the bag barely moved and Light cried out as unfamiliar pain shot into his foot.

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Heavy breathing, grunting, and the occasional cry of pain could be heard through the wall.

"Well, that was disappointing, Light-kun."

"What do you expect? It's my first time!"

"Er… maybe we should come back later…" Matsuda murmured, his cheeks turning bright red.

Aizawa looked like he was about to have a vein pop out of his forehead "Don't be a pervert! There's no way they're doing what you think they're doing!"

Matsuda grinned. "Wanna bet?"

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"Hey, I can learn anything! It's not my fault your teaching sucks."

"Do you want to learn this or not? Do it this way!" L demanded, as he again grabbed the younger man causing Light to become overbalanced and they both ended up in a tangled heap on the floor with Light on top of him, straddling his hips in a very compromising position—their faces scant inches apart.

They both froze, their chests rose and fell as they both panted hard—the sweet and spicy smell of each other's sweat filling their nostrils—as they stared deep into each other's eyes.

I… we shouldn't… Came Light's halting thoughts but it felt so good he couldn't find the will to move.

Light thought for sure that L would just kick him off but instead rolled them over so that he was on top and then closed the gap between them, aggressively claiming the younger man's mouth with his own. They were both sloppy and inexperienced but more than made up for it in enthusiasm.

What the hell is L doing with his tongue? The teen tried and failed to suppress the low moan as the older man moved his body against his as he explored every corner of Light's mouth with his tongue. Light's weak pawing at the other man's chest only spurring him on as he continued plundering his mouth until it became necessary to come up for air. But L didn't stop in his attack; the teen couldn't stop himself from making a soft whine as L began slowly running his tongue over Light's throat. Meanwhile, Light felt a hand dipping down beneath the folds of his hospital gown…

That's what the investigators saw when they peaked in the door before the Shinigami seemed to pop up out of nowhere to block their view, though they could still hear them:

"Ryu-Ryuuzaki!"

"Oh Light!"

A glare from the Shinigami suggested strongly that they give them their privacy.

"HA! I knew it! Pay up!" Matsuda crowed triumphantly once they were down the hall and out of earshot.

Aizawa grumbled but got out his wallet.