Author's Note: To anyone who's still reading this, I'm so sorry that it's taken me forever to update this! To those of you who are still interested in reading/still reading, thank you so much for your patience! I still have plans to finish this story eventually, but I'm really busy lately with college classes and the only free time I really have is on break (like I'm on now). I'll try to finish as much as I can in the next few weeks, so please stick with me! I tried to write a lot in this chapter to make up for the lost time. :)
Also, I'm looking for a Beta Reader if anyone's interested. The major I've chosen hasn't given me a lot of opportunities to refine my writing skills (as you might see below, hopefully not too much). So if you're interested in helping me out grammatically, send me a PM!
Again, thank you so much for reading!
Update 6/17/15: I'm still looking for a Beta if anyone is interested!
It's the night of graduation, and I'm... oddly calm. Which is strange, because even when I didn't have the threat of death hanging over my head I was still terrified to walk across the stage for some reason. This time, when Principal Tsunade hands me my diploma, I only have a sense of dread.
It takes longer for Sasuke to reach the stage (because his last name is closer to the end of the alphabet), but I wait patiently to see him. I have to save every last moment I have with him, even if it's just watching him from afar. It was hard to see him ever since he forgot about me. Hard to talk to him, really, because whatever had made him infatuated with me before had disappeared. That didn't stop me from trying though.
When graduation is over, and everyone is celebrating by throwing their hats up in the air, I can't. I feel frozen, even when Hinata walks over to ask me if I'm okay.
"Sakura, it's time to go," she says.
I watch, in horror, as her face turns into Konan's. "Your time is up," she whispers.
I wake up, gasping for air. The dream felt so real that time - it was like my time really was up.
It took me a while to calm down, just laying in bed and taking deep breaths, until I realized that it was almost time for me to wake up for school. My alarm for me to wake up started, and I switched it off impatiently. It was just a dream, I told myself over and over. I didn't want to think that it could become my fate one day.
"Look at them," Tenten said in disgust. She was leaning against my locker to harass me about something in the yearbook - to be honest, I had stopped paying attention after a few minutes.
I looked, and then instantly regretted it. It was Karin, smiling and laughing flirtatiously to Sasuke, who was watching her with an amused smile. It stung for a second, because I remembered how he had looked at me like that once.
"Do they have to do that around everyone?" She complained, when I turned away from them, my stomach sinking. I didn't want to know.
"I don't know," I sighed.
Tenten looked at me funny, almost in realization, and then she changed the subject. "So anyway, I was thinking that we could do a sort of winter-themed page for the yearbook..." She carried on, and I pretended like I was listening intently, although I couldn't shake the thoughts of the dream that had woken me this morning.
As I walked to my first class, I took several deep breaths in an attempt to calm down. I couldn't let this get to me, I thought. Although the possibility of me failing at my task (and then dying because of it) was daunting, I couldn't let it get to me. If I wanted to make progress, I had to stop thinking about it as much. For the past few weeks, I had been having vivid nightmares about running out of time. It was terrifying, and I felt hopeless if I thought too much about it.
When I got to English, I could tell that Hinata noticed that something was up as soon as she saw me. "Did you sleep okay?" She asked, kindly.
I shook my head. "I haven't been able to sleep very well." I admitted. The fear of having the nightmares had kept me up at night, and I wasn't getting enough sleep because of it.
Hinata nodded sympathetically. There was something in her expression that was similar to Tenten's, but I couldn't figure out what it was. Maybe it was all the lack of sleep. "Maybe you should try drinking some tea before bed, I heard it helps-"
"Hello," Kakashi interrupted, entering the classroom. For once, he was early. The class, who was so used to him being late usually, walked lazily to their spots.
As Kakashi began teaching, Hinata passed me a note: Try drinking tea. Also, do you want to go shopping with me today? Naruto asked me to go with him to the football banquet, and I don't know what to wear.
Hinata inviting me to go shopping!? Being with Naruto really must have changed her. I replied: Of course! We'll find something that makes you look hot!
When she got the note, she smiled and rolled her eyes. I winked, and then sighed to myself. The banquet always happened at the end of the fall semester, and was something that was put on to celebrate the football team. They were allowed to bring dates, but besides that it was pretty exclusive. I was usually invited by Sasuke, and the last time my boyfriend at the time, Kiba, had taken me as his date. I had a great time sitting by Sasuke and everyone else.
I knew who he was taking this year though, and it sure wasn't me.
Still, I wanted to help Hinata out, and I did like shopping. I managed to perk up during English, and by the end of the class I was fine.
News about the banquet ran rampant through the school, as the football players who were single found dates (to the disappointment of the hopeful freshman girls that I heard talking about it in yearbook), and the ones who were already dating someone were gossiped about by everyone. While I watched everyone anxiously talking about something that most of them weren't invited to, I realized how pointless it all was - why did it matter anyway? Unless, of course, you were running out of time...
But I wouldn't think about it.
During lunch, I was surprised to see that Sasuke was sitting with us.
"Hey Uchiha," the words came out before I thought about what I was saying, "how have you been?"
Sasuke looked up, as if he was inspecting me, and then smirked. "It could be better," he replied.
"Karin's mad at him!" Naruto said loudly, sitting down beside his friend. He began to shovel food into his mouth. "Where is she, anyway?"
"At the library," said Sasuke, "being tutored."
HA! Karin had to be in tutoring! I felt triumphant, as if I was winning even though Karin was the one who was dating the guy I loved.
During the ruckus caused by Naruto, Hinata sat down beside him. "Hello," she said.
"Hey!" Naruto said brightly. "Are you ready for Friday?"
"Almost," Hinata smiled shyly, "Sakura's taking me shopping after school today for a dress."
"Why?" Ami, Karin's rude friend who had been eavesdropping before sitting down at a table nearby, sneered behind Hinata. "It's not like she has a date."
I ignored Ami. "Anything for Hinata," I said, "she's going to look amazing!" Thankfully, no one acknowledged Ami's comment, so that made me feel better.
"This looks... interesting," Deidara said, studying the painting I had finished, "what do you call it?"
"I'm not sure, honestly." I answered. It was the piece I had made when I was angry - a sky with streaks of red and orange. In the midst of the landscape, there were darker colors - violet, and black.
"It's very raw," was Deidara's only response before he walked away to look at another student's artwork. He was so emotionless that I couldn't tell if he was happy with my artwork sometimes.
Hinata was beside me, working intently. She still refused to show me the painting that she was working on - Deidara seemed to think it was nice though.
I stared at the blank canvas before me, and thought about Sasuke. I wished that everything could be normal again. Sighing, I picked a deep blue color, and began to paint.
Sasuke was late to Calculus that day, so I wasn't able to talk to him before class. We had a substitute teacher, so the lights promptly went off at the start of class, and a video was played about math.
I don't know if it was the dimness of the lights, the boring video, or the lack of sleep that I had gotten, but I was asleep within minutes - until something hit my hand that startled me back awake.
I looked up, and saw Sasuke staring intently at me. Carefully, I unfolded the paper that he had thrown, and saw a note, written in his neat handwriting: Did I miss anything before class?
I picked up my pencil, and wrote: Only attendance. But he had already sorted that out.
To my surprise, Sasuke replied, Not enough sleep last night?
How could you tell? I wrote. When he got that note, the corner of his mouth twitched, and I felt elated.
We kept talking throughout the class period. To my disappointment, it didn't get past small talk, but it was something.
For the rest of the week, my nightmares got worse, to the point where I would sometimes wake up screaming in the middle of the night. This worried my mom, who seemed to think it had something to do with me being stressed about school. I went along with it, knowing that if I told her the truth she would have thought I was crazy. I had been trying to spend as much time with my parents as I could on the weekends - I didn't want to think about how hard the next year could be for them.
That Friday, I showed up to school groggy. I had only gotten a few hours of sleep last night, and it had been restless before the nightmares came. Still, I was alive at least.
I was getting my books for English, when Choji Akimichi - one of the football players - approached me. "Umm, Sakura?" He said shyly.
"Yes?" I answered.
"Naruto told me you didn't have a date to the banquet, and I don't either so..." he paused, "Umm, will you go with me? I know it's short notice..." He blushed.
"Of course!" I beamed. "Thanks Choji!"
He seemed to not have expected such an enthusiastic response from me. Choji blushed even deeper, and gave me the information for the banquet before scurrying away.
That night, I went over to Hinata's house to get ready. After school on Monday, I had found Hinata a lilac, floor-length dress that was made out of this silk material. It really brought out her eyes, and when I looked at her in it I felt proud.
"Thanks Sakura," Hinata said, looking at herself in the mirror as if she wasn't looking at herself.
"It's no problem," I said, "I'm not even done yet!" I swept her hair up on her head and arranged it into an elegant up-do. What would she ever do without me?
Once Hinata was ready, it was my turn. I had picked out a long, black halter-top dress that had been lying in my closet. It was simple, but I thought it suited me well. for my hair, I pulled it back like Hinata's, and then smiled at her. "There," I said. "Done."
I looked at myself in the mirror, wondering what I had worn to the banquet the first time - I couldn't even remember. That was strange, for me at least.
"It's almost time to go," Hinata said.
I nodded. "I think I can hear Naruto and Choji downstairs." There were faint voices coming from the living room.
"Let's go," Hinata smiled.
The boys' reactions to our outfits were even better than I expected. Naruto's mouth hung open, and he ran to Hinata and swept her off her feet. "You look beautiful!" He said.
Choji just blushed and said. "You look nice."
"Thanks," I smiled, "you clean up well too."
We took Naruto's car to the banquet - with Naruto and Hinata sitting in front and Choji and me in the back. Choji was a nice guy, I realized, and he told me about the cooking classes he was taking on the side.
"I think I want to be a chef one day," he admitted bashfully.
"I think that would be wonderful," I told him, "you should definitely cook for me sometime."
"Okay," he smiled.
The banquet was held at a convention center in town - the school was willing to spend more on the football team than the student body - and it was beautiful. Someone had decorated it in the school colors - but they were more muted and elegant. I wondered how they did that.
Inside, there were four long tables for everyone to sit at that were decorated elegantly. I was about to ask where we were supposed to sit, when something caught my eye. It was like we noticed each other at the same time - Sasuke had been looking over to the window, when suddenly he turned to where I was standing. And that's when I felt a sudden urge of longing. He was wearing a tuxedo - the same as the rest of the team - but I suddenly felt like I couldn't control myself. I had forgotten what his touch felt like, and I wanted it at that moment. There was something curious in his expression, I couldn't tell what it was.
Sasuke looked away. Karin had been pulling on his sleeve angrily. Feeling the urge to blush, I looked away too - what had I been doing? Thankfully, the only person who had noticed what had happened (other than Sasuke's angry girlfriend) was Hinata. She gave me a concerned look, which I ignored. God, he looked amazing. I missed him so much.
I ended up sitting across from Sasuke again - it was sort of like lunch, except that Karin was beside him, scowling at me. We had dinner, before awards were handed out. It was actually really fun - Choji was able to carry on a conversation really well once he opened up to me more. Sadly, neither Sasuke or Karin (I wasn't so sad about that one) were talking to one another - or to anyone. I think there might have been something wrong.
"So anyway," Naruto was continuing on one of his loud stories from where he sat by Hinata, "then I said..." I stopped paying attention. He had been going on about something for the past ten minutes, the story getting even more ridiculous as he went on. I watched Hinata roll her eyes whenever he got too silly, but she never stopped smiling at him. I could tell that Naruto adored her too, and that made me happy.
Then there were the awards, which were generic - MVP, Most Improved, etc. Sasuke had to make a speech because he was the captain, handing over the captainship to the next lucky player. I could see how much he loved them, his friends, and the way he smiled when he talked about different hardships that the team had gone through (including him breaking his arm). When he announced the new captain (a junior that I didn't know very well), I suddenly felt emotional. I had been through this once, and he had smiled at me during his speech. He had smiled, and then I had ditched Kiba (who was being an ass) to hang out with Sasuke after the banquet.
"Excuse me," I said, standing up from the table. I made my way towards the nearest bathroom before anyone could see me cry.
I sat down in a stall - it was really fancy, where did the school get the money to pay for this? - and let the tears that I had been holding back fall. It was stupid, I know, how I could get so upset over the absence of a smile. A smile that I wanted from Sasuke so badly, that probably wouldn't happen again.
I stayed in the bathroom, mourning the loss of a friend - well, of the memory of my best friend - until I calmed down enough to come out of the stall.
"Hey," Ino was in the bathroom touching up on her makeup. She was wearing a deep blue dress, and her hair was down and curled delicately. "Are you okay?"
That startled me - I hadn't heard her come into the bathroom, or I would have stayed hidden behind the stall door. Instead of replying, I just started weeping again.
Ino's eyes widened when she saw me crying. "Hey," she said again, more softly, "what's wrong?" She led me over to a couch that was in the fancy bathroom, and we sat down.
I just shook my head, how could I tell anyone without them thinking I had gone crazy? "Nothing, really," I sniffed, "I'm just overreacting. Really, it's nothing."
"Is it a boy?" Ino said. She was almost as nosey as Tenten, I thought.
"Sort of," I laughed despite myself. "It's complicated."
"It's Sasuke, isn't it?" Ino pressed. "He couldn't keep his eyes off you tonight - I could tell that Karin was pissed."
I sighed. "It is Sasuke," I said, "but it's still complicated."
"Things with Karin aren't going very well," Ino confided to me, "they're going through a rough patch - they almost broke up the other day. I don't know why they haven't yet, honestly. Sasuke doesn't have a lot of patience for bitchy girls." Ino was Karin's friend, but I could tell that some things hadn't changed. We had always thought that Karin was a bitch.
I realized, while we were talking, that this was the first time we had talked where everything was almost back to normal. I missed Ino too, and the thought almost made me cry again, but I held it back. "Really," I said, "that's interesting."
Ino grinned. "I think you would be better for him anyway. You're sort of his type, Sakura." As if I didn't know.
I shrugged. "I don't know if he has a type," I lied. "He always looks so cranky."
"You've got that right," Ino laughed. "He's like that most of the time."
"How are things with Shikamaru?" I asked. We had said hi when we first got to the banquet, but they were sitting further down the table from us, so we hadn't gotten the chance to talk.
"They're great," Ino said, "he's really applying himself now. I don't know what's gotten into him."
We talked for a few more minutes. I actually felt a lot better after crying and talking to Ino. I had been so caught up on Sasuke that I hadn't realized how much I had missed my other best friend. Ino and I had been really close once.
"We should hang out after school sometime," Ino said, before she left, "I think I need a shopping partner after I saw what you did to Hinata - you really have a gift for that kind of thing."
"Thanks," I beamed. I used to do the same thing for her, actually.
When I was alone again, I touched up my makeup, and then started walking back to the table.
"Hey," a shrill voice said, and I turned around to see Karin glaring at me.
"What?" I said, my patience waning.
"Stay away from Sasuke," she hissed. "He's mine."
"I don't know what you're talking about," I told her. What was she doing? Ino had said something about her being pissed.
"You don't even know him," she continued, "why do you think you have a chance? He's dating me now. He's happy." I could see the hatred in her face as she talked to me.
"What is it that you have against me?" I said, the words slipping out, like they had the tendency to do lately. "You hate me so much, but you've never given me a reason. Are you doing it to make yourself feel better or something? Because that's pathetic."
"You bitch," she said, "you shouldn't even be here."
"I was invited," I retorted, "and I'm going back inside now, if you'll excuse me." I walked back to the table, fuming. I didn't know how I was able to deal with Karin for a whole year before this. She was terrible!
"Where have you been?" Hinata asked me, when I sat back down. I saw Sasuke looking at me intently.
"It's a long story," I whispered to her, "I'll have to tell you later when we're alone."
Hinata nodded, and I heard Ino's voice across the table. "Sakura and I were just talking," she grinned, "we're friends now." I saw Shikamaru smirk beside her - Ino could be pretty blunt sometimes, but that's what I loved about her. Friends, I thought. The word felt right.
"That was a good speech you made, Uchiha." I told Sasuke, again using the name I used to call him when we were friends.
"Thanks," he replied. I could tell he was upset about something.
The rest of the night went well - I continued talking to Choji, and it was pleasant. Karin didn't show back up, along with her friend Ami. I think they went home together, because Sasuke ended up riding back with us.
"Saskue's in trouble," Naruto laughed, when we were walking to his car. "He can't keep a girlfriend to save his life." That was sort of true, I thought, but it was usually because he lost interest in them. Poor girls.
He dropped Choji off first, and then Hinata.
"Let me get my keys, and then I'll take you home," Hinata told me. I was car-less for the night.
"I can take her," Naruto said, "her house is in the same direction as Sasuke's."
"Are you sure?" Hinata was asking me more than Naruto. I nodded.
"Okay, goodnight!" Hinata said. I would have to tell her about what happened in the bathroom later.
We mostly rode in silence, with Naruto talking about something that was happening with basketball season - Naruto played everything. Sasuke responded, mostly mumbling. He usually only did football and track at the end of the year.
When we reached my house, I said goodnight. "Thanks for taking me home."
I was so exhausted when I got back that, after saying a hurried greeting to my mom downstairs, I cleaned the makeup off my face, slipped out of my dress (which had gotten uncomfortable as the night progressed), and fell into bed. For the first time in weeks, I was able to sleep soundly.
"My date's being an ass," I tell Sasuke. We had slipped outside to talk. Sasuke had taken a pretty girl from another school that Naruto had set him up with - her attitude was as bad as the bitchy girls that went to high school with us. "It was a nice speech though." I say.
He smiles. "Thanks. I was kind of nervous actually."
"Sasuke Uchiha, nervous?" I tease. "That's impossible!" Sasuke had actually struggled with anxiety for a few years after his parents died tragically in a car accident. He had been able to overcome it when he started getting involved with more extracurriculars like the football team.
"Shut up," he laughs. "I thought about you too," he admits.
"Of course you did!" I say, oblivious, "I'm your best friend!"
"Yeah," Sasuke says, "that's it."
"Can we get out of here?" I ask him. "It looks like our dates are getting along." As I peer through the door, I see my boyfriend Kiba, flirting with Sasuke's date, who seems to be very interested in him.
"Let's do it," Sasuke says, "I'm tired of being around people."
And that's how we ditched the football banquet. I think Kiba and I broke up for a while after that (before getting back together again), but I didn't really care. We end up going to Sasuke's house - Itachi wasn't there, as usual - and watch a movie in the living room.
I end up leaning against him, barely paying attention to the movie because we're still talking. About everything. There's one point where I make him laugh so hard that he's almost crying. And then he looks at me, and I feel differently for a second, but it's weird. Like, Sasuke's my best friend, but there's something else.
I ignore it, and we continue to talk throughout the night, until I remember my curfew, and he drives me back home.
