All things considered, the future is looking pretty good despite inventory being less than a month away. WE got a new Manager over our part of the store and so far she looks like she's more than willingly to look to us for direction. Part of the problem we had with the last manager is that she thought she KNEW what we should be doing better than the people who actually ran the individual departments. Apparently what she KNEW was how to run Apparel into the ground and how to alienate people. Our new manager who started yesterday was up front about asking US what needed to be done and how we could do it in order to get ready for inventory while cleaning up the back room. Maybe we'll manage to sell down some of that clearance that's been building up for longer than I've worked there.
One of the other things making the future look bright are College applications! Or rather they would be if I could find more than two schools I'm willing to sit through the application for. I'm now picking my colleges based on whether the program is worth the hassle of filling out the form. Which means I'm down to two grad schools. CAn anybody out there tell me about a really good chemistry program for a Masters degree? BEcause I didn't really like a lot of the ones I found doing a general search and, as I tell my friends, I'm the next best thing to computer illiterate. Meaning there are probably better ways to search.
This is your chance people, find me a good school, not overly large in a place warm and temperate and I'll be living in your area come the fall! Heheh, maybe. I've got my eye on one program, but it's never a good Idea to put all your eggs in one basket as they say. Ideally I would like to wind up west and south of where I'm at.
One thing that's sort of holding me back is the pace at which these new chapters are allowing me to write them...which means there might just be another break coming up around Valentines day. What with the inventory at work, new dpt. manager being trained, and the fickleness of my inspiration to write and grasp the characters I'm trying to use. Part 6 is going to be a bit different, but totally in keeping with the style of this fic. It's just that part 6 is the big integral part and I want to build it up over several chapters without giving too much away. Because of this, while Aki is in nearly every chapter and the chapters are based on observations of Aki's behavior, it's all through the impressions of others. And a lot of the characters I'm using I've seldomed ever focused on before.
A friend of mine, who's read almost everything I have written thus far seems to think it's still good (actually she was demanding more because nearly every chapter seems to build on the suspense instead of ending it.) I love to taunt her with new chapters I'm not sending just yet. I'm so bad!
In any case, I'm facing difficulties in my writing that all authors face at one time or another, I'm sure Rumiko Takahashi did as the characters giving me the most trouble are some of hers, rotten little bastards! ahem, I am better now.
Speaking of building suspense, I do leave things a bit at odds at the end of this chapter too. How terrible of me...Okay now I'm done cracking myself up!
Insidious Hope
Supposing the old adage to be correct in saying that every cloud has a silver lining, then all of Aki's bad experiences had to have had some good because of, in concurrence with or directly following each of them. Sadly, as is most often the case, the good does not outweigh the bad or even come close to equaling it because the surface area of some inner level of an object cannot easily be more than the surface area of the outside of the same object ad as the lining of something is usually the interior, this will hardly ever prove false.
So the good things Aki had been gifted with by the natural, unnatural course of her strange life were small rare experiences, things that were treasured not because of the personal joy brought to her but the perceived honor bestowed upon her by the rarity and beauty of it all.
Case in point, one of the most precious and rare treats for Aki was the gift of waking up to a sleeping Sesshoumaru. She knew without being told that very few others had been so privileged as to see his unguarded sleeping face and despite his propensity to sleep either on top of her in someway or clinging to her person rather tightly, she felt the meaning behind it acutely. He trusted her not to use it against him. He trusted her not to cause him harm, even if he didn't trust her to stay put.
Aki smiled at the sleeping youkai next to her who had yet again managed to cuddle her right out of the covers. She hadn't really given him reason to trust that she wouldn't take off.
She couldn't help it. It just seemed such a waste to lie there and not do something. It was a habit she'd developed when her nightmares were still at their worst. Then came the repeated encounters with Naraku's painted detachment and there you go. Staying in one place just seemed wrong.
Aki mentally shook her head and picked up a lock of Sesshoumaru's long silver hair and tickled his cheek with it. She watched as the sensation registered in his expression and displayed yet another small privilege.
The youkai lord had always made a point of dropping his expressionless mask in her presence, most especially if they were alone. He didn't hide what he was thinking, most of the time. A fact made all the more real by his unconscious reactions to her mischievous teasing with his own hair.
She couldn't help but smile when he gave no real indication of waking, realizing in her unique and thoughtful way his acute exhaustion due to his concern over her previous injuries.
It was times like this that she realized how easily she could come to love him despite his being an inconsistent blanket and bed hog.
With a sigh she pushed herself up off the hard floor into a long invigorating stretch, testing for the lingering pain in her unbound ribs. Aki couldn't really detect any pain beyond the loud protesting of her hungry stomach. Her hand rubbed the empty feeling pit in her belly absently as she pondered her slumbering would-be beau.
She supposed it wouldn't kill her to stay put this one time. Aki crouched down to move Sesshoumaru's silver hair clear of his face. He wasn't likely to sleep much longer. Once Aki's scent began to dissipate the inu youkai would search for it and eventually wake himself up.
On the other hand, since she was planning to stay put anyway and it was a bit chilly in the room without the blankets, it wouldn't be too much trouble to just climb in to the abandoned side of the blankets. Maybe it would help Sesshoumaru stay asleep a bit longer in order to catch up on his "beauty sleep."
She had to stifle a snort of laughter as she pictured the tall youkai with a sleeping mask over his face and wrapped in a quilted robe. Better yet, facial cream with cucumbers! Aki's humor grew more difficult to keep muted with each passing moment. She actually had to press a hand to her mouth to keep any sound from escaping and disturbing the youkai she was trying so hard to let sleep.
Just as she was finally getting herself back under control, the inu youkai next to her rolled over in her direction and his hands somehow managed to land in some very interesting places. She almost cracked up with nervous surprise. She would have suspected he'd done it on purpose but he was quite clearly still asleep. If he hadn't been the unconscious flex of his hands would have been a bit more effective, not that it really needed to be more effective in teasing her skin.
Aki readjusted the youkai's treacherous claws and quietly studied his face.
She was slowly remembering why she had made it such habit to disappear from Sesshoumaru's side the minute she woke up. It wasn't because the inu youkai would latch onto her like he had suckers on his arms. And it wasn't even because he had this bad habit of trying to get past whatever clothing she was wearing to touch her skin, though that was exceedingly annoying when she wasn't wearing all that much to begin with. Like now, when she was wearing a hand-me-down kimono that was too small and nothing underneath because Sesshoumaru had weaseled her out of them before she fell asleep, and he was still acting like she was wearing too many clothes. And he was asleep! It didn't bode well for her future after the curse…and that was the problem, she was still cursed.
Lying next to him while he slept tempted her to think about the future and waking up to this everyday, to daydream about being part of a family again, to be accepted and loved and supported like she had been once. And it was hard to make herself stop that train of thoughts when they were so inviting and likely to happen in her future.
But…if she didn't stop thinking like that she would find herself endangering the very family that was waiting for the threat of her curse to be neutralized, because it wasn't gone yet. At least nobody had told her it was yet, but then, no one had ever said they would inform her when the problem was resolved.
What if she was still waiting and holding back for no reason long after she could have moved on with her life?
That was a dangerous thought. Hope, this specific kind of hope, was the most difficult to guard against or control.
It scared her how easily the idea had leaked into her head. She glared at Sesshoumaru as he attempted to move closer yet again. Somehow she was certain it was all his fault. The strong urge to smack him beyond senseless rose up in her and she barely managed to restrain it.
She crossed her arms over her chest, consequently nudging the inu youkai away from her less gently than she could have, the jerk. Here she was being all nice to him and not disappearing before he woke up and he starts making her dream about the stupid future.
But it certainly was a nice future.
Aki sighed tiredly and tried to think of some way to protect against such thinking. The only way to know what effect a cause would have is to test it, so she had to figure out someway to test her curse. It would be difficult to test her particular curse without killing somebody, which was the whole reason she was testing for it in the first place.
Luckily Naraku had a tendency to create doppelgangers and other so-called living creations that were more like detachable kneecaps or antennae. Hakudoushi, for example, was more like a mini clone of Naraku, only without the independent brain and heart. So Aki had a test subject.
Except there was no way she was going to develop feeling of any kind for any thing that thought and acted like Naraku. Besides the terrible implications such a connection would make about her, she couldn't stand to put herself through a repeat of her family and friends. Her couldn't take a repeat.
So that left her to find another way to key into her curse, but how? She pondered the question as she scratched at the bandage covering part of her cheek. The bandage came up after a little more worrying at it to reveal the healing scratch underneath. Aki stared down at the reddened bandage in her hand when the idea struck her. Blood!
The curse had killed off everyone in her bloodline first and then moved to those not related to her by blood. So if she could somehow give her blood to one of Naraku's tinker toy henchmen…
If she thought of the curse as some kind of virus transferred through blood, then all she had to do was somehow get her blood into the subject system without destroying the curse in the process. Obviously feeding it to the victim wouldn't work because Sesshoumaru had already ingested some without any ill affects. She'd have to find some other way to do it.
Of course, trying to give any enemy her blood was bound to be risky. There weren't too many people (real or created as an extension of someone else) that were out to get her who would hold still and let her infect them with her cursed blood. Not that the risk would stop her.
Aki grimaced even as Sesshoumaru dragged her into a tight, unconscious embrace. She was beginning to feel like a toddler's toy whose head was about to pop off from the grip she was caught in. Part of the feeling was due to the inu youkai's confining hold, but most was due to the disgusting thought of her next big altercation with just about anything belonging to Naraku's faction.
Her future was threatening to be incredibly bloody even if she wasn't cursed. Aki wasn't experienced enough to insure only a small amount of blood was drawn from her opponent in a fight, which is why she tried to avoid drawing any blood at all. She was really good at it, but that wouldn't do her any good with her experiment.
She needed to draw the blood of her enemy in order to mix her own in the fresh wound. It was practically the only thing she could think of to do that Sesshoumaru hadn't already been exposed to (thereby proving which methods didn't work).
Sesshoumaru's arms tightened even more making it very difficult to breath regularly. Aki blinked incredulously as she gasped in pain. Why was he squeezing the day lights out of her in his sleep? He'd never done it before, at least not while she was asleep. Or so she assumed having never woken up gasping for breath and in his grasp. Maybe he as a boa constrictor in another life, next he would unhinge his jaw and eat her.
That was it! The hilarity of that last thought coupled with the ridiculousness of the situation caused a sudden loud burst of laughter to erupt from her body, startling the previously sleeping Sesshoumaru, allowing his arms to relax in reflex.
Aki leaped to her feet to escape the coils of Sesshoumaru's arms at the first opportunity, the action made clumsy by the tangled blankets and the taiyoukai's other limbs that had likewise trapped her against him.
The inu youkai blinked at her in befuddlement as she inevitably fell on top of the rumpled blankets in a laughing heap of limbs and muscle. It was the first time he had ever been awoken by laughter; his brain was having a hard time processing the situation.
Sesshoumaru's rather blank expression set her to laughing more gustily, until she was forced to either look the other way or pass out from lack of oxygen. At that point, Sesshoumaru's stupor had worn off proficiently enough to realize it was highly possible her laughter was caused by him in some way. He was beyond believing this was reason to take offense. Besides, he was more elated that she wasn't expressing words of pain peppered through out her mirth. It was a very good sign in his mind, but Aki was good at hiding her pain.
Sesshoumaru seized upon the female and rolled her under him intent on inspecting her ribs properly once again as he flicked the borrowed kimono open.
"I should've known that was the first thing you'd do," Aki smirked up at him as he wasted no time patting down her ribs. Surprisingly she had no cause to conceal her pain, even when he started applying more pressure. She had to laugh at his puzzled expression. "My healing ability is really screwy, so I never question when it does some weird speed healing in one place, but not in others." She rubbed at the exposed scratch on her face. "Sometimes I wonder if it's just a side effect of my grandmother's spell."
Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow t her. It was easy to forget about Aki's strange heritage and history, something made all the easier by her ability to get through every situation without the slightest hint of insecurity. She truly had no prior experiences to draw from when it came to youkai confrontations, but she took it all in stride so easily she seemed like a seasoned pro.
Sesshouamru let himself fall on top of her as he forced out all the worry tht had plagued the last few days. He really should stop trying to understand the woman. The female existence was like water, flowing and ever changing and utterly incapable of being grasped in his hand. As soon as he thought he had it, it would slip through his fingers and find another shape to tease him with.
Aki brushed his hair out of the inu youkai's face absently, studying his features as he closed his eyes in a show of contentment.
Sesshoumaru was just starting to consider the merits of exploiting Aki's nearly naked state when a strange rumbling, growling sound emitted from the area around her belly. What the hell?
Aki had to laugh at his confused look, which eventually dissolved into a rather interesting pout. His face was priceless, and she just knew he had been planning to misbehave in some way. "It's been doing that since I woke up," Aki chuckled as her laughter began to die down.
Sesshoumaru's pout turned into a glare, "Then why did you not go eat?" If she was hungry (and he knew how rare that was for her) she should have immediately gotten some food.
"If I had gotten up after you stole all the blankets, you wouldn't have gotten any more sleep," Aki pointed out. "Besides, the moment I step out there Kikyou is going to ply me with more of that tasteless mush from yesterday."
"You didn't think it was that tasteless last night," Sesshouamru practically purred against the sensitive skin of her neck.
Color flooded her face as she huffed, "That's because I was trying not to choke on it as it was shoved in my mouth, I didn't have time to taste it.
She was teasing, he knew, otherwise he never would have managed to get the whole bowl full into her after the first bite, especially when it went cold. And he knew this was true because he never did manage to get any of the tea into her. "You'd best watch it," Sesshoumaru pressed down on her more solidly than before. "We still have the tea left from last night."
"Oh, eww! Are you trying to make me lose my appetite?" she cried playfully. "Actually if I could make it to my bag without tipping off Kikyou, I have some peanut butter and crackers that sound pretty good about now."
"With some hot chocolate?" Sesshoumaru asked as he brushed his thumb over the skin of her cheek.
"Remember that do you?" Aki chuckled. "I'm afraid I'm out of it, and I haven't had the chance to order more."
"You should have something warm to eat," the taiyoukai thought out loud.
"Why? I'm not cold," Aki shifted curiously.
"but you were, and will be again," Sesshouamru answered.
"So will you," Aki pointed out with a laugh.
Sesshoumaru scoffed and playfully licked her cheek.
"Eww! Sesshoumaru!" Aki wiped her face disgustedly and pinched him. "Germs are a bad thing."
"Not this Sesshoumaru's germs," he replied and licked her again, more thoroughly.
She wiped it off again, "Stop that!" She couldn't help but grin at his silly behavior.
The inu youkai growled playfully and pinned her hands down before covering her face in licks and kisses until her laughter filled the room that had remained remarkably private for them.
Aki's stomach made itself known once more with a rumbling growl. Sesshoumaru growled petulantly in return.
"Come on," Aki prodded the weight keeping her down. "I need food. Besides my clothes might be dry by now." She smiled with excitement, "I might even be able to crawl into some underwear." Sesshoumaru stopped all motion towards getting up and resettled himself on top of her at those words. "Oh come on," Aki whined. "You can't have a problem with my underwear now."
He suspected he would always have a problem with Aki wearing clothes period, but he most especially disliked underwear. It wasn't just a desire to see Aki's uncovered skin, though that was a big part of it. Most of her underwear was just so complicated to take off her he tended to resort to destroying the garments, which always got him in trouble. The rest of her clothes he had learned how to remove by watching her, but the workings of, say her bra, still eluded him. So yes, he did have a problem with her underwear, but he didn't say that as he looked at her blankly.
Aki sighed huffily, "Fine, then. I'll just get used to walking around naked. I mean, it's not like there's anything Inuyasha hasn't seen before, though that was back when I was still human. I'm sure Miroku's already imagined it, but Kouga and his wolf brothers probably haven't. Then again, the first time they met me I was soaking wet and you know how clingy clothes get when they're wet…"
Sesshoumaru growled and got up long before Aki got half way through her subtle warning. No other male would see Aki naked if he had his choice, forcing him to admit clothes on Aki were perfectly wonderful. He pulled her on her feet.
"I thought you'd feel that way," Aki grinned impishly. Her grin just grew wider as he firmly closed the kimono and tied it properly in place. "Now where did you hide my underwear?" Aki asked with a chuckled. It was the only reason he had won the argument the night before; he had quite craftily hidden her panties somewhere and prevented her from finding them.
Sesshoumaru growled and prodded her into facing the door, unwilling to expose his hiding place if he didn't have to. A youkai needed every resource he could muster when dealing with a woman as sharp as Aki.
"I can't believe you're still being so secretive about this," Aki muttered. "It's not like you're going to have cause to stash them here again…" she thought about it a moment before continuing. "Unless you hid them on your person, then you might need to keep it secret, but I would eventually figure it out." Sesshoumaru growled as he tossed the piece of intimate clothing her way. "Hah! I'm right!" she laughed as she stepped into the newly returned garment. "They smell like you." The smelled strongly of the taiyoukai, indicating they'd spent quite some time on or near his person giving solid evidence to support her theory of him pocketing her underwear in some form or other.
Sesshoumaru didn't bother to say whether she was wrong or right as he led the way out of the room.
"'Bout time you two joined the land of the living," Fred teased.
"You're one to talk," Aki muttered. "I'd have been up hours ago," she replied with a sniff, "but Sleeping Beauty decided to go all Boa Constrictor on me in his sleep."
"I always knew he was a snake deep down," Fred responded seriously. "Only a reptile would be seriously interested in you for a romantic partner."
"Well, it's better than the single celled organisms you consorted with," Aki returned. "But then, they were probably the only creatures dumb enough to want a romantic connection with you."
"At least I managed to find more than one of them to fill the role," the ghost retorted. "You had to be transported through time to find even one reptile."
Aki sniffed, "Reptiles are a dime a dozen, can I help it if I demand quality in my partners? It was why you were never considered."
"OH, and exactly which quality were you looking for?" Fred scoffed.
"Quality did not indicate a single characteristic, but a multitude of good traits wrapped in one package, which is where you always fell short. You only have one good character trait, all the rest are flaws and psychosis that you pride yourself on."
"Oh, I feel the burn," Fred gasped with a grin. "You're definitely feeling better."
"But of course," Aki shook her head at him.
"You two are weird," Ayame declared from her station close to the fired and surrounded by wolves. "They told me you two were friends, but all you do is insult each other."
Aki blinked at Fred, "Do you feel insulted?"
"By you? Never," the ghost shook his head. "I understand you too well."
"Same here," Aki nodded.
"If that's your version of friendship, I'd hate to see how you treat your enemies," Ayame shook her head as some of the wolves moved to brush against Aki.
"Hmm, I wonder too," Aki looked toward her feet blocked from view by the furry bodies showing her love.
Ayame stared at her like a landed gold fish. How could someone as powerful as Aki not have enemies?
"So what did you come out here for anyway?" Fred asked absently. "I kind of expected our number one youkai here to hold you captive a long as possible just to safeguard his sanity after your last bought crazy behavior.
"Her stomach demanded otherwise," Sesshoumaru declared petulantly.
"I come hunting peanut butter," Aki declared with a serious look on her face.
"A bold and elusive prey," Fred nodded solemnly.
"Don't go over board or Sesshoumaru will get all up in arms to keep me from it before I can prove how harmless it is," Aki growled.
"As harmless as dihydrogen monoxide," Fred nodded.
"He means water!" Aki yelled at the look the two youkai gave her. "Fred, if I could beat you…" she trailed off as she found her lonely bag stashed in a corner.
"And here I thought the saying ran more along the lines of 'Get not between a woman and her chocolate', when it's been peanut butter all along," Fred teased.
"The chocolate on still stands for most people," Aki noted absently as she fished out her small container of peanut butter a package of crackers. "Hey, I forgot these were in here!" Aki smiled as she brought to light a box of raisins. "All I need now is some celery and I could have ants on a log."
"Why on earth did they call it that anyway?" Fred asked in general.
"Why do they call barbeque chicken wings, buffalo wings? Or those things at fast food places chicken fingers?" Aki returned, "It's just a name."
"What the hell are those things?" Ayame demanded pointing at the shriveled black things Aki was munching on. She was almost afraid they really were ants.
"Raisins. They take grapes and dry them out to make 'em," Aki answered. "Where is everybody?"
"The kids are playing in the fresh snow and the two idiots, er," Fred paused at Ayame's glare. "Inuyasha and Kouga are fighting outside with Miroku, Hakkaku and Ginta playing referee. Kikyou went to collect souls," he continued, his disgust coloring the words. "Kagome and Sango sought out the hot spring a while ago. Jaken, Kagura and Mr. Moley are watching the kids."
"I got stuck here," Ayame grumbled in frustration. "Just because I got caught in the storm yesterday."
"Probably for the best," Aki observed the wolf's blustering. "You did almost die."
"I'm fine!" the red head snarled.
Aki finished her crackers and raisins, packing up the rest of the peanut butter before standing up with a stretch and heading for the door only pausing to pull on her jeans as she went.
"Where are you going?" Fred demanded.
"Outside of course," Aki replied.
"You got caught in the storm yesterday too!" Ayame growled.
"Just because I agree with good advice doesn't mean I follow it," Aki smirked. "Besides, trouble's coming and I have to call the unobservant fools back home."
