I suddenly heard a beeping sound and my eyes started to open. But I wasn't in a hospital. I was at the edge of a building looking down at the road. I was so high up and it seemed like a long way down. But I wasn't standing up. I was lying on my bed and I was strapped on with all sorts of belt. I looked around to see if anyone can bring me back to the hospital but instead, I saw Kevin behind the hospital bed threatening to push me down. His eyes were filled with so much anger and he held something that seemed like a cutter. He cut off the blood supply and pushed me off the edge. The wind was blowing my hair as I was going to crash on the concrete. Just a few inches more and I'd hit the ground. I wanted to scream but I couldn't. I wanted to find away to unlock myself from the belts that held me but there was no way out. I squirmed and screamed as I tried to get out and then I jumped up.
I gave myself a reality check. I was still in the hospital. I breathe heavily in and out and sighed in so much relief.
I saw Zack lying on the couch asleep. It was already night and somehow, I didn't feel like going back to sleep. I couldn't feel my legs one bit as I sat up and the nurse came in again.
"So, any pain?" she asked terrified. I guess my panic attack just a while ago scared her.
"Just numbness," I said staring at her clipboard. It had initials on it and it was wrapped around with a heart.
"You shouldn't strain yourself anymore. You tore a muscle trying to get up," she said and I felt kinda shocked.
"What's wrong with me anyway?" I asked the nurse.
"Nothing actually, you just keep doing what you're not supposed to." She said looking at the heart monitor.
"Then what's with the mixed emotions?" I asked.
"Oh, that's nothing just a side effect from the drugs they placed on you," she said and I just nodded.
"What time is it?" I asked her.
"It's about ten in the evening." She said and left. I hate it when people just leave like that.
I stared at the ceiling for a while and wondered about what would happen if ended up amputated. I didn't want them to cut off my legs so I guess all I can do is lie here until it's all over. All my thoughts came rushing in to my head as stared intently in to space. I thought about what I should say to Zack, if I should apologize to him and if I should just forgive him and move on happily with him. I tried to think about my dream and I was afraid to sleep again for fear that it might come back and haunt me. I checked my phone with my free hand and saw that I had a ton of missed calls. There were some from my parents, some from Cassie and the one that caused all this, Zack.
"Hey," Zack said capturing my attention.
"Zack, I'm sorry," I said and he stood up and sat beside my bed.
"You don't have to apologize to me. If anyone has to apologize for all this, it would be me so I'm sorry," he said grabbing my free hand. He held it rather tightly and gripped it and applied a little bit of pressure.
"Fine then, thank you," I said remembering the whole issue about blood.
"The blood thing wasn't really my idea." He said and that surprised me.
"Then who's was it?" I asked inquisitively.
"The doctor's obviously," he said and I rolled my eyes and gave out a small chuckle. He stared at me while I smiled and for a second there, it felt kinda weird.
"What?" I said.
"Nothing, it's just that I missed that smile on your face," he said stroking it with his fingers and suddenly his expression changed. He leaned in and kissed me. And I kissed him back.
This time I wasn't afraid to kiss him anymore. Nothing could stop me now not even Kevin. With Zack, I feel a lot safer. I feel better and it's as if I'm in better care when I'm with him. Being in this hospital gave me the opportunity to forgive him and maybe this was a good thing. It might lead someplace I've never been in before. I cherished every last bit of this moment as I felt his lips on mine. Savoring every minute with him and knowing that there is still so much ahead of us.
