by now we were in the first month of term nothing was being solved and I wanted to leave. I was bored of fucking Damon and Stefan and winding up pretty little Elena. Elijah won't let me leave. Aro was doing my head in seriously who does he think he is. I mean we are supposed to be working together but Aro keeps starting arguments.

The past month has been crap. I haven't touched a bottle of anything in such a long time now I think I have forgotten the taste. The punishments haven't been bad I mean I can take them of course but it doesn't stop the pain I feel still for Elena. The punishments of course have mostly been emotional pain they want to torture me with Elena and she seems to be getting some thrill out of it. She has changed drastically since we split up. I have though been sent on a weekly alcohol and drug meetings with another vampire he is chalky like our fellow friends here so I am guessing he knows them but I don't need help with drinking as I said I haven't drank for such a long time.

I don't know what is wrong with Damon lately over the last few weeks well month actually he has been distance. He was coming to my room with the other guys every night but lately he hasn't even though the others have still been coming. Caroline has been spending time away and then sneaking in at who knows what time and the chalky vampires are arguing with each other apparently they are all married so I don't know what is going on.

Urgh elena is doing my head in she is needy so needy every night I used to visit her and I would be punished for it and it was exciting. I was also done punishing my brother for everything. I was almost done drinking and I am kind of involved with someone but she is married.

The first month has been a success I can see the difference of the teenagers already. They have all stopped their drugs and drinking well pretty much and the punishing isn't as heavy which is disappointing I rather enjoy it. My teenagers are all arguing and fighting everyday they fight and everyday someone else breaks up with their partners I have lost track of time.