The next few days with Dean were rough. Cas spent his week in Dean's room in the hospital. Ignoring his phone and watching over his sick lover. He had multiple missed calls from both Naomi and Balthazar. Eventually he turned his phone off, he refused to leave Dean's side. Dean had sweat inducing nightmares, constantly thrashing in his sleep. Dean's life was no longer threatened, at least not immediate. However Dean had been regularly putting harsh drugs into his body and was fighting withdrawal. Every time Dean had a fit, Cas would crawl into the bed with him and hold him until Dean calmed down. Once the doctors decided Dean's condition was stable enough, he was discharged from the hospital. Sam had brought Dean some fresh clothes and after he was dressed, they headed toward the front door. Dean was still fairly weak and had to lean on Cas for support. "Oh shit.'" Cas groaned.

There were news vans and reporters littering the parking lot of the hospital. Cas wasn't sure how they found out Dean was here. Sick as he was, Dean didn't need this irritation right now. Sam was standing at the front door, ready to usher Cas and Dean through the crowd. The moment the three men stepped outside they were swarmed. "Dean!" A woman shoved a microphone in Dean's face, Cas's blood began to boil. "We heard your brother say you were sick last week. What was wrong? Do you have cancer? Or is it drugs?" Dean only groaned in response, putting more weight on Cas. "Get out of here you harpy!" Cas swatted her microphone away. The woman looked offended then shoved the microphone is Cas's face this time. Cas was ready to start swinging. "And just who are you sir? A friend of Dean's?" the woman stood her ground, waiting for an answer. "none of your god damn business! Dean's still sick, move the fuck out of the way!" The woman stepped back, mouth agape. Sam stepped in front of the two men, using his large stature to shove past a group of men with flashing cameras. After clearing the group of reporters, they reached the impala. "Hey Baby..." Dean mumbled weakly, fingers grazing the hood of the car. Cas laid Dean down in the back seat, the reporters somehow had the nerve to approach the Impala. Cas whipped around, bright blue eyes smoldering with anger. The group of reporters took a step back, almost in unison. Cas and Sam climbed into the Impala and drove off.

They arrived at Dean's house, Cas pulled him out of the car. Dean had an arm slung over Cas's shoulder. Cas looked back, making sure there was nobody behind them. He dared those reporters to show their fucking faces here. "Mnnn...Cas..." Dean groaned. Cas snapped back to reality. "Oh right. Sorry Dean..." Sam unlocked the door, helping Dean and Cas into the house. "You want me to carry him upstairs Castiel?" Sam closed the door behind them. Cas shook his head "No I've got him he's not as heavy..." cas trailed off "As he...used to be." Sam nodded but followed Cas and Dean upstairs anyways. After stripping Dean's clothes off, Cas laid him in the bed. "You need anything Dean?" Cas petted Dean's head. Sam was standing in the doorway, looking in. "Uh uh..." Dean paused "Can you lay with me for a bit?" Cas nodded. He heard the door shut behind him, Sam had left. Cas crawled into the bed, interlocking his fingers with Dean's. "How are you feeling?" Cas asked as Dean rested his head on his shoulder. "Like crap." Dean sighed. Cas chuckled "Heh I bet." He wrapped his arms around Dean, pulling him close. "I'm really sorry Cas. To make you worry like that." Dean snuggled to his lover's chest. "It's alright Dean. I kind of drove you to it." Cas felt Dean shake his head. "No you didn't Cas, you only broke up with me. I reacted badly." Cas patted Dean's hair. "None of that matters now. Let's just focus on getting you better okay?" Dean nodded in agreement.

That night was rougher than the ones at the hospital. Any time Dean had a fit the doctors could drug him, calming him down while Cas held him. Tonight however, Cas was in the bed with Dean as he flailed wildly. Cas could have sworn Dean never fought him this hard. He held Dean tight, trying to calm him down. Dean was only half asleep when these fits happened. Unfortunately Dean was thrashing so hard that Cas couldn't hold him, leading to Dean knocking a fist right into Cas's eye. "Fuck..." Cas grasped his right eye. Dean was unaware of what he had done and continued to thrash until he was worn out. Cas sighed. Hopefully that would be the only fit tonight. Cas winced as he closed his eyes, falling asleep. He sat up the next morning and rubbed his eyes. "Fuck...ow..." He had forgotten about getting punched last night. Dean continued to snooze, finally looking peaceful. Cas headed to the bathroom and examined his eye. "Dammit." Dean had gotten him good. A nice purple and black shiner decorated Cas's face now. Cas whipped around when he heard a loud banging downstairs. "Dean!" Cas rushed out of the bathroom. "Oh thank God..." Dean was still conked out in the bed, snoring quietly. The banging continued downstairs. "What the hell?" Cas started down the stairs. The source of the noise was someone banging on the front door. Was it Sam? No. Sam had a key. Cas swore if it was a reporter (like he wasn't one himself) he was going to kick their ass. He flung the door open, ready for a fight. It wasn't a reporter. It was Balthazar. "Cas!" Balthazar flung his arms around Cas's neck, hugging him.

"I was so worried about you, you twit!" Balthazar pulled back. "Why haven't you been answering your phone? Naomi..." Balthazar paused, his expression turned grim. "Cassy...what happened to your eye mate?" Cas grazed his injured eye with his fingers. "Uh...well..." Cas tried to think of an explanation. "Did Dean hit you?" Balthazar's expression darkened. Cas couldn't think of a single thing to say, he stood there dumbstruck. "He did! That son of a bitch! I swear I'm gonna..." Cas heard a noise behind him. "Cas?" Dean rubbed his eyes. "What's going on?" Dean stepped down the final step of the staircase. Balthazar lunged at Dean, both men falling to the ground. "Balthazar! Stop!" Cas screamed as Balthazar punched Dean across his jaw. "You son of a bitch!" Balthazar roared "How dare you hit Cas?!" Dean flung his arms up, trying to protect him self. "What do you mean? I didn't hit him!" Balthazar punched Dean again. "Bullshit! Look at his face!" Cas yanked Balthazar off Dean. "Cas what is he..." Dean trailed off, spotting Cas's black eye. "Oh my God...did I do that?" Dean stood up and walked towards Cas. It took every ounce of respect for his friend that Balthazar had not to jump Dean again. "When did I..." Dean lightly touched the bruise, Cas flinched in response. "It's alright Dean. You accidentally did it in your sleep." Dean's shoulders dropped. "Oh my God...Cas...I'm so sorry..." Dean hesitantly pressed a hand against Cas's cheek. Cas smiled "It's fine Dean. It was an accident." Balthazar was still fuming off to the side, unsure of what he should do.

Dean started to tear up. "Cas...I'm sorry...I'm so sorry." Cas pulled Dean in, resting Dean's head on his shoulder. "Dean I'm fine. It was an accident." Cas turned his attention to Balthazar. "I'm fine Balthazar. Dean's just recovering from his addiction. He thrashes in his sleep." Cas patted Dean's head as the man sniffed into his shoulder. Balthazar sighed. "Cassy...i know that you love him but..." Cas raised a hand. "I do love him Balthazar. I'm not going to leave him to fight this alone. This is because of me." Cas entirely blamed himself for Dean's condition. Balthazar opened his mouth to speak but no words came out. He walked toward Cas, laying a hand on his shoulder. "Cas please promise me...if you need help you'll call me." Cas nodded, wrapping his arms around Dean. Balthazar removed his hand, sighing as he headed out the front door. "Come on Dean." Cas patted the sobbing man's back. "Ill make you breakfast." Cas pulled Dean into the kitchen and sat him at the table. Cas was making eggs, humming what Dean recognized as an old Beatles song. Cas seemed content, like what happened didn't just really happen. Dean couldn't take his eyes off Cas's bruise. "Cas..." Dean mumbled. Cas looked up from the pan. "Hmmm?" Dean sighed "Are you sure that it's safe for you to stay here?" Cas turned his attention back to the eggs. "Im fine Dean. I keep telling you it was just an accident." Cas turned back to Dean and smiled. "I'm a big boy Dean. I can handle myself." Dean chuckled as Cas plated the eggs. "Sorry it's just eggs. Your fridge is pretty empty." Dean shook his head. "Its fine Cas, thank you." Dean smiled, the smile disappeared when he looked at Cas's eye again. "Hey Cas. Actually would you mind picking up some groceries?" Dean had to get Cas out of the house, he couldn't bear to look at the bruise. "Sure. I'm staying here a while anyways, we need food." After a silent breakfast, Cas changed clothes and headed for the door. Dean stood in the doorway. "Bye Cas baby." Dean leaned over Cas, kissing him gently. Cas smiled through the kiss. "Don't do anything stupid okay Dean?" the emerald eyed man chuckled. "I wont." Cas nodded and headed for his now dusty Cadillac. Dean waved out the window as Cas pulled out of the driveway.

"Should I get Dean something special?" Cas stood in the bakery of the grocery store. He surveyed the row of various kinds of pie. "Hmmm I don't know which one he would like best." Eventually he decided on apple, Dean had once mentioned he liked apple pie. At the check out line, Cas was loading the groceries onto the conveyor belt. "Hey..." the cashier examined Cas. "I know you from somewhere..." Cas shook his head. "You must be mistaken." The cashier narrowed her eyes. "Oh! you're that guy that was with Dean Winchester when he came out of the hospital!" The girl yelled a little too loudly. Cas sighed "fuck..." he mumbled. "Is he okay? Are you friends? When's he going to start touring again.?" Cas found this girl beyond annoying. "Can you just ring up my items please?" The girl huffed. Ringing Cas's groceries up a little rougher than she usually would. After loading the groceries into the car, his phone rang in his pocket. "Hello?" A voice screamed on the other side of the phone. "Castiel!" It was Naomi. "Where the hell have you been?! And why were there photos of you coming out of the hospital with Dean Winchester?!" Cas had to hold the phone a few inches from his ear. "None of your damn business Naomi!" Cas screamed into the phone. "Castiel! Dont you dare talk to me like that! You come to my office right now or you're fired!" Cas growled. "Fine. Fucking fire me! I don't care!" Cas hung up, shoving the phone back into his pocket. Cas tried to ignore the conversation, focusing on Dean. He really hoped Dean liked the pie.

Cas pulled into Dean's driveway. Groceries in hand, Cas struggled with the handle before pushing the door open. A crash came from the den. Cas dropped the groceries immediately, rushing to the room. It was in a chaos, everything strewn about, flatscreen TV shattered. "Dean!" Dean's hand was bloody, glass from the television screen embedded in it. "Oh Dean..." Cas approached Dean carefully, reaching a hand out slowly. "Get away from me Cas!" Dean swung his uninjured arm into Cas, knocking him into a nearby table. "Guh..." Cas gripped his shoulder, it had hit the corner of the table. Dean was panting like a wild animal, growling rumbling in his throat. The withdrawal was hitting him really hard, making him violent. Dean unclenched his fist, fury disappearing from his eyes. "Aghhh..." Cas groaned, gripping his injured shoulder. Dean turned his attention to Cas. "Oh my God...Cas..." Dean looked down at his injured lover, realizing what he had just done. Dean squatted down, afraid to touch Cas. "Ngh..." Cas groaned as he rotated his shoulder. Thank god it wasn't dislocated but it still hurt like hell. "Cas...I..." Dean started. Cas forced a smile, trying not to worry Dean. "I'm fine Dean. I just fell." Dean shook his head "No you didn't. I hit you again didn't i?" Cas stood up, holding his shoulder. "It's fine Dean, you didn't know you were doing it." Cas grunted. "Cas I'm sorry..." It felt like the millionth time Dean had apologized. "It's not your fault Dean. Come here" Cas released his shoulder and held his arms out to Dean. Cas didn't want to admit how much it hurt to raise his arm. Dean stood there, unmoving as he stared at Cas with his arms open wide. Dean didn't want to touch Cas again, he didn't want to hurt him again. "Dean...please." Cas winced as he opened his arms wider. "Come here." Giving in, Dean wrapped his arms around Cas, holding him close. "Do you forgive me Cas?" Dean squeezed tighter. Cas flinched, his shoulder still hurt. "Of course I do Dean. Don't worry, I'm here for you. We can get through this together." Cas and Dean stood there for what seemed like forever. Wrapped in the others arms, not wanting to let go. Cas decided right then and there, no matter how rough it got, he was going to be there for Dean. Not matter what.

awww angst and pain. sorry guys necessary evil. Reviews appreciated :).

This account is no longer active. i have moved to archive of our own (a03) i currently have 22 supernatural stories written as of 5/29/15. some multiple chapters. my page is /users/captaindestiel1/works. i write minimum one story a week and sometimes four stories max a week depending. if you want to keep following me or like my writing then please visit my a03 page :).