JEDI DREAMING

by: ardavenport

- - - Part 9 - - -

We had beaten them badly in our last battle. They were scattered and weak and they hated themselves for it. But after many days it was agreed in the council to give mercy. We let them into the oasis and into the shelter of the caves, so they would not starve, or die of thirst, or burn under the cruel radiation of the four suns.

In less than one sleep cycle, the Sith had revived enough to attack us and kill four of us, including Peta-Dah who had argued strongest against mercy. . . .

Obi-Wan sat back in his chair in the Archive. He supposed that this could be considered an example of compassion, but it really looked more like bad judgement to him. He noted it as such and moved on to the next except from Qui-Gon's chaotic list.

He sat at a single terminal in an alcove amidst the glowing data stacks that towered above him toward the ceiling. Across the wide aisle, in his own alcove, Qui-Gon sat at his own terminal. Stacks of data cylinders, blocks, flat disks, rectangular chits, spheres and a few other shapes cluttered the desk on top of a scattering of flimsies. His hand tapping the control pad, Qui-Gon looked focused, his expression intense in the bluish glow of the shifting images on his screen. Obi-Wan sighed, thinking about what his Master would pick out to be sifted through later.

Obi-Wan felt some relief that he had been able to impose a little order and boundaries on what they were doing. With a poorly defined goal of studying compassion, plus Qui-Gon using the Force to guide his research, they had a huge mess by their second day. Obi-Wan had rebelled and the Archivists backed him up. Qui-Gon had relented and agreed to stick to some priorities for his data searches and categorized the things he passed on to Obi-Wan for review. But Qui-Gon added his own version of rebellion by constantly making up new categories as he went.

Obi-Wan did not think that he was being deliberately contrary; Qui-Gon just had not settled on what he was really looking for. But Qui-Gon did at least confirm that this research was personal and not an assignment for the Council. Obi-Wan had hinted that possibly it was related to Qui-Gon's physical conflict with Master Yoda. Qui-Gon had hinted back that this might be so. Obi-Wan had let the matter drop. He did not wish to get in the middle of a private conflict between his Master and Yoda.

Obi-Wan smiled to himself. He would help his Master in this personal task, ill-defined as it was, out of compassion.

He flicked through several more entries, culled from completely different and unrelated areas of Jedi history. But a motion across the aisle caught his eye.

Qui-Gon left his terminal. Surprised, Obi-Wan turned his head to see where he was going, but his Master vanished down the aisle. The data stacks blocked Obi-Wan's veiw.

It was too early for second meal and it was unlikely that Qui-Gon would interrupt his research just to go to the refresher. Like all Jedi Masters, Qui-Gon could use the Force to go for many hours without needing to pee, a capacity on which Obi-Wan worked hard in his own disciplines and training just to keep up with Qui-Gon, especially on long missions.

A moment later, Qui-Gon reappeared with one of the Archivist, an older woman named Jocasta Nu. She looked from Qui-Gon to his cluttered terminal and scowled.

"Master Qui-Gon, the Archivists are not here to clean up after whatever it is you've been up to," she admonished, her tone severe, her lined face harsh.

Qui-Gon softly apologized and bowed and then turned to Obi-Wan.

"We have been summoned by the Council, Obi-Wan," he said in a quiet voice.

Obi-Wan started and then quickly marked and saved his own data files. He got up from his spotless desk and followed Qui-Gon. Standing over Qui-Gon's abandoned desk, her hands full, Jocasta Nu followed them with her glare.

They exited the Archive. Obi-Wan looked for calm inside himself as they walked immense corridors of the Jedi Temple toward the lifts that would take them up to the Council spire. He had trouble finding it.

The Jedi Council must have made their decision on Qui-Gon's grievances against Master Yoda. Though Qui-Gon had sternly denied it, Obi-Wan still felt as though he was the source of the conflict between Qui-Gon and Yoda. Certainly his actions had started everything. But Obi-Wan had done as Qui-Gon instructed and not speculated on what this final conclusion would be. He had happily not thought about conflict at all since he had left the med center with Qui-Gon when three Council members had intercepted them.

Obi-Wan now recalled the brief looks of surprise on the faces of Mace Windu, Ki-Adi Mundi and Oppo Rancisis. Though partially healed, Qui-Gon's face, black and purple on one side, looked its worst then. He had straightened and calmly answered their minimal questions. Then they had unnerved Obi-Wan by asking to speak to him privately. Though Master Windu and Master Mundi spoke only kindly, Obi-Wan had been embarrassed that he could not control his own discomfort answering their questions, and he knew they could see it in him. After the interview Qui-Gon had sent him away while he spoke to the Council members privately.

Obi-Wan had heard nothing about the Council's deliberations since then and he had not asked about them either.

The two of them reached the lift and entered. It was empty.

"Calm, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon told him.

"Yes, Master," he answered automatically without really feeling it.

The lift arrived at the top of the Council tower of the Temple. Obi-Wan properly folded his arms before him into the sleeves of his robe. He and Qui-Gon exited the lift and crossed the ante-chamber. The huge gray door did not open for them, so they stood there, waiting until the Jedi Council was ready for them.

Obi-Wan had suggested to his Master that he withdraw his original petition since Yoda had apologized, at least for striking him, but Qui-Gon refused. 'You must be firm about your authority as a Master, Obi-Wan,' he had instructed. 'Our confrontation does not alter my objections to Yoda's actions toward you.' Obi-Wan accepted this, but now, waiting for the Council's judgement, he wished to be finished and past the whole business. He had thought he had wrung out all the emotion he had from it, but now he could feel them creeping back anew.

Next to him, Qui-Gon, his face now completely healed, looked a bit too serene. 'Do not anticipate,' Qui-Gon had said, when Obi-Wan asked what would happen to Master Yoda. Thinking about it, Obi-Wan realized that he had no energy left in him to wonder what would happen next. Was that the key to acceptance? Being so weary of something so you had no strength left to wonder about it anymore? Obi-Wan hoped not.

The doors parted. They entered the Council chamber. Through the room's wide windows, it was a bright, sunny day, shining down over the gray city-planet spread out below the Temple. Qui-Gon took his place in the center of the room, Obi-Wan just behind him, on his right. They both bowed.

"Master Qui-Gon, we are first to address the matter of your petition against Master Yoda," Ki-Adi Mundi began in his gentle voice, inclining his tall head toward them. Obi-Wan heard feet and claws slapping the floor, but he resisted the urge to turn his head. Yoda tapped forward on his stick to stand next to Qui-Gon.

"For the charge of not informing Master Qui-Gon of his Padawan's distress during his absence," Mundi began, "the Council partially agrees with Master Qui-Gon. While the Council reserves the right to decide what communications may be sent during priority missions, Master Yoda did not inform the rest of the Council of his decision. This contributed to the later confusion caused by Padawan Kenobi's request to Master Yaddle."

Obi-Wan's eyes went toward Yaddle's chair, but Qui-Gon blocked his view, and he dared not lean forward to look. Was she angry at him? At Yoda? All around him, he sensed a ring of judges, but no specific thoughts.

"For the charge of Master Yoda offering inadequate guidance to Padawan Kenobi during Master Qui-Gon's absence," Mundi continued, "the Council partially agrees with Master Qui-Gon. Padawan Kenobi first sought out Master Yoda's advice, which was sensible and adequate. However, Master Yoda forbid that he communicate with Master Qui-Gon which, again, should have been a decision of the whole Council." Master Mundi emphasized the word 'whole' with this statement.

"For the charge of Master Yoda denying Padawan Kenobi the counsel of others, the Council finds no merit. We have found no evidence that Master Yoda interfered with Padawan Kenobi's attempts to seek any other counsel in the Temple."

Obi-Wan's eyes went to Qui-Gon, who remained immobile and expressionless, as were all the Jedi Masters seated around them.

"And for the charge of Master Yoda disciplining Padawan Kenobi without authority, the Council finds wholly in favor of Master Qui-Gon. While Padawan Kenobi's actions were ill-considered, Master Yoda had not informed the whole Council about Padawan Kenobi's requests to contact Master Qui-Gon in the first place."

Obi-Wan felt everyone's attention on him each time his name was spoken. Mundi looked downward.

"You have heard the judgement of this Council, Master Yoda. How do you reply?"

Yoda's aged and nearly bald head nodded forward. "Accept, I do, this judgement."

Mundi looked up. "And do you accept as well, Master Qui-Gon?"

"I do, my Masters."

Mundi nodded his head. The other Masters moved, tilted heads, relaxed shoulders, glanced at one another. Obi-Wan let his breath out.

Yoda turned and tapped a few steps to stand before Obi-Wan. Surprised, he stared down at the old Master whose large green eyes looked up to him.

"Sorry, I am. Proud I was, to think that I should teach you better than your Master." Yoda bowed his head and sighed before looking up again. "Saw fault I did, in your concern for Master Qui-Gon. But blind I was to fault in myself."

Obi-Wan did not know what to do. Was he supposed to speak? Why did Yoda not apologize to Qui-Gon instead? Had Qui-Gon asked for this? Obi-Wan had not read the petition.

He stared down at the small green Master at his feet. Everyone on the Council stared at them. Qui-Gon was looking at them. All the emotions he had though were dried up inside him flooded back into life again.

Obi-Wan knelt down, closer to Yoda's level.

"Thank-you," he said, his voice barely audible. He felt miserable again. This summons before the Council was turning out to be far worse than he had imagined. Yoda tapped forward. One clawed hand reached up and Obi-Wan laid his hand in between the rough, blunt fingers.

"The Force is with you, young Obi-Wan," Yoda said, his aged, raspy voice low, meant only for him. He could feel it, a sense of heat and lightness radiating out from his hand, like the sunlight outside, rich with centuries of emotions that did not weigh him down, but renewed his strength. Obi-Wan looked into those large green eyes and they now seemed very young to him.

"Feel it you do," Yoda smirked.

Obi-Wan nodded, mute with the dawning sense that his past anguish would not dry up his heart, but bear him forward. To combine with new hurts, he supposed.

A hand lay on his shoulder, bringing with it a different sense of warmth from the Force. Qui-Gon. His recent anguish suddenly connected with the hours he had spent with Qui-Gon hunting in the Archives for compassion in the Annals of the Jedi Order. They were small and inconspicuous, but they were everywhere, sprinkled in among the tales of heroic deeds; innocents saved at great risk, shared resources, even enemies befriended and turned. Amidst his Padawan's confusion about what their purpose was, Qui-Gon had been very pleased. Obi-Wan felt that again now.

Yoda smiled. He took his hand away and turned back toward his fellow Council members. Obi-Wan stood. Qui-Gon's hand lingered on his back before they all resumed their stances again.

"By agreement of all Council members, Master Yoda is publicly barred for the next year from issuing any directives in the interests of the Council at all. In that time, it is hoped that we will all come to understand what those directives truly are," Mundi concluded. Heads nodded to the other seated Council members and Obi-Wan gratefully felt the hearing coming to an end.

"And now, for the matter of the Master Yoda's physical abuse of Master Qui-Gon," Mundi began again.

Obi-Wan tensed. He had hoped that this would not be part of this meeting since Yoda and Qui-Gon had apologized to each other about it.

"You have communicated that there was more to say about this, Master Qui-Gon?" Mundi asked, his tone only curious. The other Council members also had questioning expressions and Yoda turned to look up at the tall Master next to him.

"Yes, my Master. It concerns my recent researches in the Archive."

Mundi and the other Masters seemed to understand what this meant, but Obi-Wan was completely baffled.

"Aaah." Mundi nodded, then turned toward Obi-Wan.

"You are excused now, Padawan."

Not quite understanding what he had just heard, Obi-Wan stared stupidly back. Their research in the Archive? Should he stay for that? Qui-Gon nudged him. Obi-Wan turned his head.

"I will call on you when we are finished, Obi-Wan," his Master assured him.

Obi-Wan finally understood and hastily bowed to the Council. He hurried out. But he turned to see Qui-Gon standing alone in the center of the sunlit Council room, before the gray doors slid closed again.

- - - End Part 9 - - -