"Emily if you squeeze any harder, it'll pop." Emily looked down in her hand and then up to glare at Morgan. "Don't shoot me princess. I was just making an observation. What's up with you lately? Missing the new baby?" Emily opened her palm to release the stress ball and then threw it at Morgan. "Of course I miss him but that's not the problem." Morgan looked at Emily with curious eyes, silently asking her to keep talking. She stood up and paced for all of two seconds before plopping her body down back down into the chair. "Steve is hiding something and I don't know what it is." "Or you're just overthinking things."
Emily got up and Morgan put his hands up in defense, "I'm sorry princess. I'll just keep my mouth shut." Emily looked at Morgan apologetically, "I'm sorry Derek, I really am. I just have a lot on my mind right now. Do you think that I'm finding reasons to not trust Steve?" Morgan raised his eyebrows and tried to figure out a way to answer that but ultimately opted not to. "Princess I think I'm the wrong person to ask that question."
While mapping the geographical profile, Reid heard Emily and Derek talking but waited until Derek left the room before he spoke to Emily. He turned around awkwardly and saw the dazed and confused look on her face and accidentally knocked the table. Emily looked up at Reid, "You okay Spencer?" "Are you okay?" "What do you mean?" "You just called me Spencer?" "I didn't notice."
Emily blew out an exasperated breath and grabbed her phone to make a call. She stayed in the room with Reid but migrated more towards an empty corner. "Can she talk? Let me talk to her before she goes to sleep please. Hey mom….You sound a little better. I'm working but I always have time for you. Please don't fight and take your medication. I…I love you too." Emily almost let a stray tear fall but held it back. Reid opened his mouth to say something but pursed his lips instead. Hotch and Rossi came back into the room with a lead on the case.
Emily sat balled up on the back of the jet. Her long hair was cascading around her face, successfully hiding her downcast eyes. She sat motionless for the entire 5-hour flight. Rossi noticed that she wasn't engaging in any group conversation. Hotch noticed that she wouldn't make eye contact with anyone. Reid noticed that she never turned the page of her book. Morgan noticed that she barely blinked and seemed to be in a daze. JJ noticed the tears swirling in her eyes. Emily knew that everyone was probably staring at her; she couldn't make her racing thoughts stop long enough to care. She leaned back further into her seat and tried to disappear completely.
Emily got off the jet and hurried ahead of everyone else to the bullpen. "Is she okay?" Garcia half-whispered as Emily rushed right past her. JJ said nothing and just walked to her office. Morgan wrapped his arms around his babygirl, "She's Prentiss. She'll be fine." Garcia wasn't impressed but decided to leave it alone for now. After a few hours everyone started to file out of the bullpen to go to their respective homes, Reid decided to talk to Emily. "Is your mom okay?" The look on Emily's face went from angry to defeated. She mumbled out, "No she's-she's not well." "What's wrong?"
Emily look at Reid and couldn't remotely be mad. He was being himself and she was fortunate in knowing that he was completely oblivious to how emotional she was at the moment. "She's got cancer. Stage Four lung cancer. She's in her final years." Reid watched Emily wipe the tears away. "Does Steve know?" "No he doesn't. She's been sick for a couple of years now. It's starting to progress faster." "You've been dealing with this by yourself for two years?"
Emily scoffed before bowing her head slightly, "Yeah. This, my kids, this job, and everything in between." "Would he not understand?" "I don't know. I honestly don't." "Back to what you asked Morgan the other day, I don't think that you're finding reasons to not trust Steve. I think that you're just scared. That logically makes no sense because I haven't known you to be scared of anything." Emily's laugh interrupted Reid's train of thought and all she said was, "I'm afraid of spiders." "Did you know that arachnophobia is more common amongst-" "Thank you Reid. Seriously, thank you for being you." "I don't know how to be anyone else." "That's what I love about you. I'm going to head out now."
Instead of going straight home, Emily stopped by her mother's home in Alexandria. She walked on shaky legs, as she always did these days, to the front door. A round, short woman answered the door, "Emily it's nice to see you again." "You too Marianna." "Your mother's in her bedroom." "Thank you."
Emily walked through the foyer and stopped in the living room. The picture of her at 10 years old smiling with her mother was missing. Ambassador Prentiss felt as if she was seeing her only daughter grow up in snapshots. At every formal event, Emily seemed to change more and develop gracefully. Elizabeth knew that Emily had always wanted to go skiing. She had Emily flown out to Switzerland. Emily was surprised to see her mother, the posh, authoritative, politician dressed in ski gear. They spent the entire morning together on the bunny hill learning how to ski. Later on in the day, the two ventured out onto an actual ski slope and had the time of their lives. That night, Elizabeth held her daughter close and told her childhood stories while they had hot chocolate. That was the best memory Emily ever had with her mother. Emily blinked back the tears and made her way to the staircase. Once she got to her mother's room, she knocked and entered slowly upon hearing the quiet 'come in'. Elizabeth looked at how broken her daughter was and held her arms open. Almost childlike, Emily took her shoes off and climbed into bed and into her mother's embrace. Both women cried silently and held on to one another for a long stretch of time. Elizabeth pulled back first and cradled her daughter's face in her hands. She saw the dark circles and tired eyes that her little girl shouldn't have been bearing. "Emily I need you to do me a favor." "Anything."
"Don't waste your life living in fear. Don't keep cheating yourself out of happiness. Don't let the past determine the future. You are an amazing woman, mother, friend, daughter, and agent. You put everyone else above yourself and make everyone around you feel better. I know that you want to marry Steve but you're afraid. You're afraid that he'll leave. Live in the now and worry about the future later. Promise me that you'll do that long after I'm gone." "I promise."
Emily phone buzzed with a text from Steve.
We really need to talk. There are some things I need to get off my chest and there's something that you're hiding from me. I'll wait up for you.
"Is everything okay Emily?" "I have to go home."
A/N: Final chapter up next
