A/N: OMG! Two chapters in one day? Impressed, anyone:D

Fandom: Kingdom Hearts & Final Fantasy VIII

Pairing: SeiferHayner (with mention of others)

Notes: story 3 of 3. Sequel to "For What It's Worth"

Standard Disclaimers Apply.

In So Many Words

Chapter 8: Darkest Before the Dawn

Leon sighed. "It's alright, Mushu. He's one of the good guys…sort of."

Mushu slowly raised a brow at Leon, arms crossing his chest, "I do not feel comfortable with this," he jerked a thumb at Seifer in the doorway, looking ragged and a little bit insane really. "Being one of the 'good guys'. We got a reputation to uphold! Can't just let everyone into the good guy club!"

"One more word and you'll be a Cajun-style dragon, midget," Seifer said, glaring daggers at the little fire breather. He wasn't intimidated. He was sure he could out-fry the smart-mouthed dragon any day of the week.

"Whaddid you say?! Why I oughta…!" Mushu made a gesture as if pushing up his sleeves.

Leon pinched the bridge of his nose. "Mushu, it's freezing out there. Either let him in, or go outside to see who can melt the mountain faster, but whatever you do, close the damn door," Cloud said, subtly rubbing his lover's shoulders. Leon looked up at him with a subtle gratefulness and from his place and with a good amount of muttering and complaint Mushu stepped aside and let Seifer in.

"You ran into some trouble," Leon stated as Seifer stalked inside, eyes darting from one side of the room to the other. Leon had seen him this way before. Paranoid. Nervous. Looking for demons in every shadow. It was right after Adel's brainwashing had worn off. He ended up back at Garden—though he'd taken the long way around—and he just cut too pathetic a figure, trying to act like his usual badass self, to wholly turn away. Still, any time Seifer strolled back into his life Squall couldn't help but get the sinking feeling everything was about to go straight to hell.

"I'll get him next time," Seifer muttered, mostly to himself before asking directly. "Is he here?"

Leon sighed. "In the kitchen."

Once Seifer passed through the door, Leon leaned his head back and looked up at Cloud. "For our Honeymoon…maybe we should go to the 100 Acre Wood."

Cloud quirked a brow. "You want to spend our honeymoon inside of a book?"

"I want to spend our honeymoon somewhere quiet with no heartless, no Seifer Almasys and plenty of places to hide. Somewhere quiet where people say 'vacation' and actually mean it."

Cloud smirked down at him and ran his fingers through deep chocolate hair. "I'll think about it."

---

Hayner was bending over to peek into the microwave, waiting for his snacks to be done—mini-hotdogs in a crispy croissant wrapping. Yum. So he was really pretty distracted and didn't hear Seifer come in…and yelped when the older man suddenly latched onto him, pulling him into a tight back-to-chest embrace.

'Zell. Oh Zell, I am sooo sorry. The signs were all there and I was just too pre-occupied to see them,' Seifer thought, inhaling the sea breeze scent of Hayner's hair, the slight muskiness of his skin.

Hayner yelped in surprise and struggled free to turn and see who'd suddenly attacked him only to find Seifer giving him the strangest look. "Wh-what? Do I have something on my face?" he asked. And then, "Hey, Seifer, you know, you kinda look like shi—mmph!"

Hayner didn't get to finish that sentence, primarily because Seifer grabbed him again, propped him up to sit on the kitchen counter, and devoured his lips in the kind of fierce, passionate kiss you only see in movies and even then only the ones where lovers have been separated for years at a time only to have a tearful reunion. Hayner's eyes widened in shock, but he couldn't keep that up as his mind went blank and he felt a tingly, numbing sensation coil in his belly and explode outwards all the way to his toes and the tips of his hair. Before he could really get a grasp on what was happening he was wrapping his arms around Seifer's broad shoulders and moaning softly into the kiss.

Seifer didn't take his time plunging his tongue into the teenager's mouth as if he was trying to devour the boy whole and intended to start with his mouth. It was…a little clumsier than he remembered Zell being, but still pretty nice. He'd caught his love by surprise, after all. When they parted, panting for breath, Hayner's cheeks were bright red.

"I missed you so much," Seifer breathed. It seemed so simple to him. Hayner was Zell. Therefore, he obviously must have missed him too, and he obviously would understand what he was talking about and why he kissed him in such a way and every little nuance of what was going through his head.

But Hayner wasn't Zell, not exactly. He was confused, and blushed and tripped over his tongue awkwardly, wondering what had come over Seifer and why that kiss had felt so amazingly, undeniably right and… "m-my hot dogs…" Were probably cold by now.

Seifer actually grinned at him, and what an amazing expression it was—the way his green eyes lit up and dashed years of his features. He laughed a little, a warm, melodic sound and moved out of the way, gesturing towards the microwave and stepping out of the way so Hayner could hop off of the table only to be swooped up into Seifer's arms again, mini hot dogs in one hand, Hayner in the other, as he put the snacks on the table and the teenager in his lap, nuzzling his neck a bit.

Was Seifer on drugs? It was all Hayner could think. Seifer had to be on something.

"Can I have one?" the older male asked with the strangest tone of adoration.

"Get your own," Hayner instinctively snapped.

Seifer grinned and stole one anyway. When Hayner protested, Seifer tried to kiss him again. Hayner turned at the last second, blushing and shoving a handful of mini-wieners into his mouth as an excuse and Seifer's lips ended up landing on his cheekbone. Seifer was on drugs. Definitely. There was no other explanation for this bizarre behavior, so he decided for the moment he'd let it slide…even if this position was more than a little embarrassing.

As the teen stuffed his face with one hand—he DID really like hot dogs and it kept Seifer from any impromptu kisses temporarily (hopefully until the weird drugs wore off)—Seifer grabbed the other and ran his hand over the black and silver gloves he was still wearing. Hayner had quickly become attached to them, really. They were comfortable, well worn, and they made him feel like less of a wimp. He felt safer when he wore them.

"Metal Knuckles," Seifer said, running his fingers over the ridged plate over the back of Hayner's hand. "I haven't seen these in a long time."

Hayner swallowed. "Leon gave them to me."

It was at that point that Seifer realized something was wrong. Hayner had just said 'Leon'. Not 'Squall', but 'Leon'. He said it naturally, as if he didn't find the new name a little odd. Seifer couldn't get used to it and Zell and Squall had been best friends. Zell shouldn't have such an easy time adapting to the name change.

Hayner blinked as the older male narrowed his eyes studiously, like he was trying to find something wrong.

'Have I just made a fool of myself?' Seifer wondered. He chose his words carefully for someone who's mind was spinning. "Do you…remember him?"

"Should I?" Hayner asked, blinking.

"…and…me?"

Convinced now that Seifer was coming down from some bizarre high, Hayner just blinked. "Of course I know you. You beat me up all the time."

"When did we meet?"

"You came crashing through the wall," Hayner answered.

Seifer shook his head a bit. "No," he said, "Before then."

Hayner looked at him like he had three heads. "I think you're over tired."

"No, that's not… Zell…"

Hayner frowned and promptly got up. It was something about Zell. Again! Who the hell was this Zell person anyway? Before he understood why, his temper exploded. "I am NOT Zell," his hand slammed into his chest. "I'm just me! Hayner! Stop comparing me to him! I have feelings too you know!" And for an instant, just an instant, Hayner had felt like maybe deep down, somewhere inside Seifer was attracted to him, not the reminder of some long dead lover, but him, Hayner. And Hayner thought, well, Seifer was a handsome guy, and deep down he had the feeling there was more than the man let on. More than just the badass, the bully…there was more to Seifer. For a few moments Hayner thought he might like it, unraveling those layers to find the man underneath. Holding and being held… It was embarrassing to think about, but he thought, maybe…

But he was just a replacement. No, not even a replacement, a misunderstanding.

Seifer understood then. Zell was in there, but not in the way he left him. Hayner wasn't Zell. Not exactly. He was Zell's Nobody. A shadow of Zell, not even a real person at all, not really. He thought he was, but he was just a shadow. All the traits Zell had that he'd hated and grown to love…they were all there. His favorite foods, his stubborn pride, even his looks. They were all there, but altered, subdued, not as vibrant. Hayner was nobody. He was only a shadow. But he was Zell's shadow, and damn it! If a shadow was the closest he could get to the man he loved, then he'd take it. He swallowed his pride a bit and said, "Sorry, you just…remind me so much of him sometimes. You're Hayner, of course. I know. I'm just a little overtired." He forced a weak, appeasing smile.

If Zell had fallen for him…all he had to do was work at it a little and Hayner would too. He was sure of it. Sure, nobodies didn't have hearts, not really. But Hayner thought he had one, right? It didn't matter even that's how it was. He'd sell his soul to the devil if it meant he could be with Zell again—even if that Zell was only a shadow seen in passing. He'd call him whatever he wanted to be called. Names didn't matter. Some piece of Zell was still alive in this boy from Twilight Town. As far as Seifer Almasy was concerned, that's all he needed to know.