Chapter 9 – revalidating
Once I had myself propped up against a wall, I cried myself to sleep. Yeah I know, that sounds dramatic, but this is my life.
I can't remember what I dreamed but at some point I woke up. I was sliding down sideways and I woke up from the feeling of falling. I tried to catch myself with my arms but my muscles were still too weak.
My arms couldn't hold me and bended sideways, letting my face bump to the ground.
"ughh" I grunted.
I just lay still with half of my face pressed against the cold floor. I could feel something wet spreading around my face. I probably bit my lip during the fall.
My legs were still in sitting position and my hands rested under me on the ground with my elbows propped up. Yeah, real comfortable.
Just the effort of trying to catch myself made me go limp. I tried one more time to move: I got my hands from under me and turned on my side, so my back was now against the wall.
I tried to keep conscious, but I blacked out.
Something was really wrong with me.
They found me like that the next morning still laying in that awkward position.
Steve came in first, probably wanting to have a 'talk' about my behavior yesterday. He was shadowed by a guy and a girl around my age wearing the black uniform.
Steve stood still in the middle of the room. I looked at him through my half closed eyelids.
"Do you realise what you've done?"
He started.
"I won't forget this easy."
I didn't respond.
"Do you hear what I'm saying?"
He sounds different now then when we met Thomas the other day. He sounded scared then, afraid to get on Thomas bad side. Now he sounded like he could burst out in flames any second.
That thought made me laugh inside and a smile crept on my face.
"Why are you laughing?! You think this is funny?"
He turned to his colleges.
"Pick her up, we'll have a full session with her."
"But Sir, she already had many shocks and that's-" The girl started.
"DON'T YOU DARE TALK BACK TO ME!" Steve screamed to her.
The girls face turned red and she and the boy quickly opened my cage. I didn't move, I was afraid for pain and another back out. They opened the lock around my leg, dragged me out and stopped in front of Steve
He looked at me with a confused look. If I could, I would have stood up straight and looked him in the eye. But I couldn't, and he noticed it too.
"What's wrong with you?"
"She's really cold sir" The boy said.
"Did I ask you something?!"
Steve didn't say anything for a while. Then he lifted my head and looked me in the eyes. I was so tired I couldn't open my eyes all the way.
Steve let me go and turned around, he got something out of his pocket and after some seconds I heard him talking softly.
"We have a case 66b here….. Well yeah, I think so…. Yes... Yes… It could be just a
Breakdown, we've had them before…. I don't know, she seems out of it…. Yeah, I'll bring
her."
Steve turned and faced his guards.
"Okay, change of plans. We'll bring her to the hospital wing."
"But sir, they told us to bring her-"
"I know what they told us! I was there!" Steve screamed to the girl.
"So get your asses up and bring her to the hospital wing!"
We quickly left the room.
I don't remember much from the trip, I think I passed out on the way over there. But I remember them dragging me into a big room, then through some glass doors and laying me on a small bed.
I heard Steve talk some more, about me having to be tied down.
"We don't know yet what she is capable of yet. She already pulled some tricks, who knows what she'll come up with next."
"I don't care, I've told you before: I don't want patients tied down: it slows down the healing process." An unfamiliar voice responded.
"Give her a shot of Ambrosia, and lock her down."
After that everything became fuzzy again and I was pulled back into sweet dreams of nothingness.
I felt a sting in my arm and I opened my eyes. I was blinded by bright lights so I squinted and turned towards the pain.
I saw a shadow stand over me doing something with my arm.
"What… are… you doing?" I asked.
"Nothing, just relax. You'll be okay."
I tried to move my arm but it was tied down in place. A cold feeling came over me.
"What are you doing? Let me go!" I yelled.
I knew this man, I knew him. And he had me again!
"Let me go! Let me GO! Grank! Get off me!"
"It's okay, just relax. I'm not Grank"
He was lying.
"Fuck of Grank! GO away!"
I tried to move but I couldn't, every part of me was tied down.
Panic started to rise even more when realization hit me: 'I'm back, I'm back, I'm back'
The memories came flooding back and I started sweating all over my body. I fought against the chains.
"I'm back! No! No! Don't fucking touch me!"
My whole inside started to boil. I knew this would happen, I knew they would bring me back, to Grank, to that place, to that bed.
This was bound to happen, I had pushed too far.
"She won't calm down!" The shadow yelled.
"Can you blame her? She's tied down for Gods sake!" another person yelled back.
"Just help me with her!"
The next couple of days were just revalidation.
They'd told me the shocks had done a great deal on my body. So much that they had caused a kind of temporally paralysis. Which was why sitting up straight took so much effort; my body was in a state of shock.
I heard later that when they brought me in the hospital they'd immediately started with medication, Ambrosia to be precisely. The medication had woken me up and after that I went completely insane, screaming about Grank, and that 'He had to let me go'. They gave me a shot for sleeping and I didn't wake up for a couple of hours.
My doctor also told me that I kept talking in my sleep about 'a guy named Percy', but he said he didn't told anyone. Which made me kind of grateful, I don't expect Steve being happy about that.
Steve did visit, more often when I got better. He didn't talk to me or anything, he just looked at my chart and asked the doctor how long till I could continue my training.
My doctor would answer and Steve would disagree. Then they started arguing which always ended with my doctor scolding Steve for what he did to me, and Steve storming out of the door.
I stayed for about a week in the hospital wing. I was in a tiny glass room with walls made of glass. All around me I saw more of these kind of rooms with people in them, in, just like me, a high iron bed. Doctors and nurses were buzzing through the rooms like bees. Talking to patients or treating them, which occasionally, caused screaming going on for hours.
I could see that some patients were free, and by that I mean, they weren't tied down: they were still locked up in there glass room, being watched and examined as the days went on.
Some patients on the other hand were, just like, me tied down. There were screamers between them, fighting there bonds day and night trying to get out. I would be one of them, but I still was too weak and I knew that that wasn't going to help.
So I just lay still there, doing nothing, waiting.
With the days I was more abled to do stuff, they slowly got me back to standing up straight and after a couple of days I was even able to walk alone again.
I was allowed to eat by myself, but was still on an IV for my medication. Which still gave me a taste of apples once in a while.
I talked with my doctor most of the time, his name was Dr. Ronals. But that was all I got from him. We tried talking about me, but that conversation soon ended due to lack of information. So he talked about this place and what it stands for.
I have a feeling he truly believes that this place is a good thing, that it is helping the world.
I didn't feel like correcting him, so I let him talk.
When we weren't talking I thought about Percy. Which was strange, because normally I would be focusing on getting out, or thinking up a trick. But Percy kept popping up in my head. It was embarrassing, not just because he was removing any other thought, but also because I wasn't thinking about Percy in a normal way. I was thinking about Percy in a more… closer way.
I tried to think back about our shared history. Because I'm definitely sure we have one: we have a deep connection. Okay that sounds cheesy, but I mean: he knew my name before I did. And I recognized his smell, and eyes… and lips… and-
Okay, so, let's stop there.
What I'm trying to say is that he was on my mind.
