Back with some Addison and Derek! Tessa's daring escape will take place next chapter and i'm still working out some of the details. i am so thankful for all the follows and reviews this story has received. i never imagined how far it would go, so really, Thank you! Please enjoy this chapter!


"So, you'll be home around seven, then? I just want to know when to start dinner." Addison waited patiently for her husband's reply as he studied the scans in front of his face. Derek finally turned his attention to her.

"Yeah, my surgery should be over at six, six thirty at the latest. That gives me just enough time to grab my paperwork and be home just in time." Derek stood up and paused to kiss Addison on the cheek before hurrying to scrub in. The red head smiled fondly as her husband ran down the hospital, way too eager to be in the OR. She checked her wristwatch, quickening her pace as she realized she had a patient waiting for her. A nurse slid the chart in her outstretched hand as she knocked on the door, alerting the patient to her entrance.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd, but, seeing as that is kind of a mouthful, you can call me Dr. Shepherd. I'm sorry to have kept you waiting; I was on a consult."

The lie flew easily from her mouth; it was her go-to excuse from her early resident days when she and Derek would sneak off. Addison lifted her eyes from the chart in her hands to formally meet her new patient. A young blonde woman sat on the exam table, her hand gently rubbing her round belly. A nervous smile graced her lips as she reached to shake Addison's outstretched hand.

"Hello. I'm Allie Finch. It's nice to meet you."

Allie tilted her head to the side and narrowed her hazel eyes, looking Addison up and down. Her brow came together in concentration as she watched her doctor begin to start up the ultrasound machine. Addison noticed the young woman staring at her and raised her eyebrow in puzzlement.

"Ms. Finch? Is there a problem?" Allie jumped then shook her head in embarrassment.

"No, no there's no problem. It's just that you look very familiar and I can't place you."

Addison smiled as she rubbed the gel on her patient's belly. "You'd be surprised on how often I hear that. I must have one of those faces. If you look right here, you'll see your son's-"

Addison cut herself off, her green eyes focused on the little screen. Allie looked up at her doctor in concern.

"Dr. Shepherd? Is everything all right? Is my baby okay?"

Addison quickly smiled reassuringly at Allie, mentally kicking herself for frightening her. "I'm sorry I frightened you like that, but it seems like your son has amniotic bands wrapped around his left leg."

Allie's eyes widened and her hand moved to her belly, as if trying to feel the constricting tissue around her baby's limb. "What does that mean, exactly? Will he be able to walk? Could it cause permanent damage?"

The neonatal surgeon held up her hand to halt the questions. "It is a serious condition that luckily I can fix with a laparoscopic procedure, if you wish to operate. If you don't, there could be significant damage or complete loss of limb."

Allie's eyes filled with panic as her diagnosis sank in. "He- he could lose his leg?"

Addison nodded solemnly. "If you choose not to operate, yes. But, I have a high success rate with this surgery, and by the looks of it, the band is high on his thigh. There is a very good chance that I could remove it with little complications. But, there are risks with every surgery."

The young woman stared down at her belly, and nodded gently. She looked back up at Addison, and then her eyes widened in surprise. "I remember you! I saw you on the news! Your daughter was kidnapped."

Addison pursed her lips as she wiped Allie's belly off. The reporters had been hounding her and Derek for an interview for weeks after Tessa first vanished. They finally agreed to a brief interview, if only to get the vultures off their backs. Every employee at the hospital had watched it, and then told the Shepherds about watching it, as if that was a show of support, but Allie was the first patient to make the connection.

"Did they find her yet?"

The red head bit her lip before answering, trying to keep her emotions in check. "No. No, they haven't." She refrained from adding, and they probably won't, in order not to frighten her patient even more. The soon to be mother adjusted her shirt back over her bump slowly before looking shyly back at her doctor.

"Do-do you think about her while you work? That must take up a lot of your attention."

The doctor quirked an eyebrow at the strange question. "Well, as I'm sure you know, it's hard not to think about your child, so yes I do. But, honestly, I try not to because it's very painful, but then again, it's hard not to."

Allie nodded as if that was what she suspected all along. "Then, I think I'm going ask if someone else can do the surgery."

Addison blinked in surprise. She hadn't expected that. "Ms. Finch, that's fine, if you really want someone else to perform the surgery, but I assure you, I am highly qualified. The most qualified on the west coast, not too brag."

Allie slid off the exam table and began to grab her purse. "I'm not doubting your skills, Dr. Shepherd. I'm sure you are quite capable, but this is my baby, and I don't want you to be distracted by your…situation while I'm on your table." She looked away, embarrassed by her request. "I just worry if you would be focused on my son's health or your daughter."

Addison nodded as if she approved of this ridiculous decision her foolish patient had made. "Well, if that's how you feel, then I will recommend some names for you. But, I assure you, I have performed countless surgeries since my daughter's disappearance and they have all ended with healthy and happy babies."

Allie just nodded, and then spoke softly. "I'm sorry, but I am sticking with my decision, Dr. Shepherd."


Addison sighed as she sipped from her second glass of wine for the evening. Her perfectly capable hands stirred the pasta on the stove. She had decided to make Derek's favorite meal of salmon and garlic butter pasta with a Caesar salad, thankfully all things she could make. Her eyes flicked to the numbers on the top of the stove, wondering when Derek would get home. It was already 6:50; he should be home any minute. She heard the front door open, and then slam shut.

"I'm in the kitchen!" she called loudly.

"I see that."

The tall woman spun around at the feminine voice. Amelia stood smirking at her from across the island. She chuckled softly before turning back towards the food on the stove. "You were supposed to be Derek."

"Hope I'm not too big of a disappointment."

Amelia walked closer to her sister-in-law and peaked over her shoulder. "Is it safe for me to be in the kitchen with you cooking? It seems like kind of a risk."

Addison glanced over her shoulder at the younger woman. "If you keep up with the attitude, it is." She sighed before adding, "I hope you're not planning on staying for dinner, because I only got enough to feed me and Derek."

Amelia moved to the refrigerator and grabbed a cold water bottle. "No, I'm not staying. I just wanted to come over. I hadn't seen you in a while. Thought I'd drop in."

The older woman looked at Amelia out of the corner of her eye, knowing what she meant. "I'm fine. Work helps." She paused, wondering if she should mention her patient from this morning. She decided against it, knowing that she should send Amelia on her way before her brother came home. There had been an undeniable tension between the Shepherd siblings that neither had been willing to talk about, but was awkwardly obvious to anyone in the same room.

"Yeah, it helps me too." Amelia tilted her head with a smile as she watched her friend slowly pull the fish out of the oven. "You know, it probably isn't healthy that we bury our pain in surgeries. We could actually talk to someone."

Addison turned raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You are suggesting going to therapy? Who are you and what have you done with Amelia?"

"Har Har. I'm just saying it might help." Amelia's blue eyes pierced Addie's green ones. "Look, I say this out of love and concern. I know you say you're fine, and I know you put on that mask that fools everyone else into thinking you're fine, but I know you are not fine."

Addison placed the hot dish on the stove and turned to face her sister-in-law. "You're right. I am not fine, though I am coping. And I think I'm doing as well as can be expected, Amelia. I appreciate your concern, but in the grand scheme of things, I think I am doing all right. Now, I love you, but you need to leave before your brother gets home and I have you two fighting like cats and dogs."

Amelia gave her a meaningful look and she quickly added, "But, if it will put your mind at ease, I will consider talking to someone. Now, go."

The brunette smiled victoriously as she walked out of her brother's home and right into the man himself. She quickly sidestepped around him and continued briskly on her way before he could say anything. Derek shook his head at his sister's retreating form before entering his house.

"Addie, I'm home!" Derek heard his wife call out from the kitchen and hurried into the room. His wife was sliding a piece of fish onto a plate already loaded down with pasta and salad. He smiled at the sight of her in a pair of sweatpants and one of his old t shirts, with her red hair piled messily on the top of her head. The neurosurgeon could never decide when his wife looked the most beautiful. She was undeniably striking when she became Doctor Montgomery-Shepherd each day, but he was just as entranced by her when she had just woken up. Addison noticed her husband watching her lovingly from the doorway and flashed him a brilliant smile. She walked over to him quickly and wrapped her arms around his neck tightly. She pressed a kiss against his lips in greeting.

"It's good to see you too, Ad. Dinner smells fantastic. Let me go clean up and change before we eat." Derek rushed upstairs to pull on a Seahawks t shirt and flannel pajama pants before returning to his wife again. Addison had poured them glasses of their favorite wine and waited patiently for her husband at their kitchen table. She was just sitting down as Derek slid into the kitchen. He quickly joined his wife and began to dig in. The red head chuckled softly.

"Hungry, are you?"

Her husband nodded as he savored his meal. "I skipped lunch accidently today. Got caught up in a case with Bailey. Guy came in with major head trauma and internal bleeding. Barely made it to my surgery in time. Luckily, I was only putting in a shunt. I could do it with my eyes closed, not to sound boastful. How was your day?"

Addison took a bite of her salad before speaking. "It was kind of… strange, I guess. I had a patient tell me that she didn't want me to perform a surgery on her."

Derek's eyebrows rose in surprise. "Did she give you a reason why?"

His wife hesitated before answering. Derek tended to shut down when Tessa was brought up in conversation and Addison wanted to have a nice evening with him, but she felt that this was important.

"Yes, she did. She recognized me from that interview we did a little while ago. She was concerned I'd be distracted during her operation; basically, she didn't trust me not to kill her baby when I would be trying to remove an amniotic band from his leg."

Derek took a large gulp of his wine before he met his wife's gaze. "That's ridiculous. What did you do?"

Addison shrugged. "What could I do? I assured her that I was more than capable of performing the surgery but she insisted, so I referred her to the next closest surgeon who would be willing to operate, who happens to be in Florida." She paused, gauging her husband's reaction before continuing.

"She was the first one to ever make the connection. I'm surprised it took this long, honestly. I would have thought more patients would recognize me."

Derek was no longer eating and Addison could tell he was starting to get upset, but Tessa had been weighing heavily on her mind ever since her patient had left with a referral in her hand.

"It's hard to believe that she's been gone for four months, isn't it?" She asked him softly.

Her husband licked his lips before answering her, his voice hard. "Yes, it's hard to believe. It's hard to believe that has only been four months when I could swear it's been decades since I have seen my daughter. These four months have dragged on for years, Addison."

Green eyes met angry blue ones over a forgotten meal. Amelia was right; they had all been hiding in ORs instead of talking about the elephant in the room. She could feel the argument coming on, and to buy some time, she thoughtfully sipped from her wine.

"Derek, these have been the hardest months of my life, too. We both seem to have forgotten that we both lost our child. I thought the worst thing that would ever happen to our family was the whole Mark fiasco. I never thought we would lose our daughter like we did. Both of us are familiar with heartbreak. But, this is a completely different kind of heartbreak. This leaves your heart in pieces that you are sure you won't be able to put back. It's so hard to keep my hopes up when we have had nothing to hold onto-"

"We have plenty to hold on to. We have the fact that we will see Tessa again. That's more than enough." Derek stood up and put his half-eaten dinner on the island and began to walk away. Addison followed his lead and began to clean up.

"But, Derek, we don't know if we will see her again. We can hope with every fiber of our being, but we don't know. I want more than anything for us to be a family again. But there is no way to guarantee that will ever happen, and that kills me a little bit every day."

A heavy sigh escaped her body, the weight of her thoughts leaving with a rush. She hadn't realized how good it would feel to say that. Now that her words hung in the air between them, she waited anxiously for Derek's response. When he finally spoke, his voice was so soft she almost missed it.

"Are you saying you're giving up?"

Addison felt her heart stop. Could he really think that? That she would give up on her daughter like that?

"How could you say that, Derek? Do really think I would just throw in the towel, say well, we did all we could, let's move on? I stated the facts, Derek. I would do anything to have Tessa right here in the kitchen with us. I would give anything in the world for that. Hell, I would give my soul to know if she was even alive. Because, even though it is unimaginable to us, that is a very real possibility. Our daughter may be gone forever. That is our painfully harsh reality."

Derek stood silently in the threshold of his kitchen watching his wife slowly starting to crumble. The Forbes-Montgomery in her would allow her to finish the fight. He knew she was right, logically. He knew that he had been unfair. He wanted to take his cruel words back, to not have seen the hurt in her eyes. But, it was too late for that. They were going to finish this conversation, both knowing that it would end with someone in tears.

"Don't you think I know she could be dead? That is my first thought every morning. I wonder if today will be the day that a cop tells me they found my daughter's body in a ditch. I know that she could be dead. I choose to believe that she isn't. I choose to believe that she is alive, waiting for us to find her. I choose to ignore our reality and pray for a miracle."

"I can't do that, Derek. I have to prepare myself for the worst, because if I don't, I won't be able to survive. If the day comes that I am told my child is dead, I will most certainly crumble. That will be a blow comparable to no other. I cannot go into that with my hopes up. But, a little part of me wakes up cheering every morning that today will be the day I see my daughter again. I have to try really hard to contain that little part of me." Tears were starting to build up in her eyes and she knew she didn't have much more in her. She closed the distance in between them and reached for his hands.

"Do you know what I do every morning when I get to the hospital? I check the overnight ER admissions just hoping I will see a teenaged girl matching our daughter's description. Does that sound like I've given up?"

Derek stared at their joined hands, a small smile on his lips. A chuckle burst from his lip and Addison jerked in surprise.

"Is that funny to you?"

Another giggle. Addison began to wonder if her husband was suffering from a nervous breakdown. She placed her hands on the side of his head and forced him to look at her.

"Derek? Are you okay?"

The neurosurgeon began to laugh even more at his wife's concerned expression. "I'm fine, Addie. I promise. It's just that- I do that too. I can't believe we both do that. Great minds really do think alike, huh?"

A smile found its way onto Addison's face at her husband's confession. They had gotten what had been feeling out in the open, and they were dealing with it, in their own weird way. She fell into his arms, relieved that they had really talked. The couple stood there for a moment, both suddenly realizing how badly they needed a hug. Addison pulled away first than began to clean up the kitchen. She loaded the dishes into the dishwasher and glanced slyly up at her husband.

"I think we should talk to a professional, Derek. We should have a long time ago."

Derek was ready to protest, but he knew his wife was right once again. He nodded in agreement as he put the wine bottle away. When the kitchen was once again in order, Addison led her husband up to their bed and they fell asleep in each other's arms, finding comfort in the knowledge that no matter the outcome, they would have each other.