Apocalypse Meow

Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own The Cat Returns—not now, not ever.

As the Cat Guards escorted the three companions away from the castle, Haru did her best not to betray any hint of what Baron was planning. True, she had no inkling of what this plan was, but she knew that there was a plan. And she certainly didn't want the Guards knowing that she knew there was a plan. For if they knew that she knew there was a plan, it would certainly ruin the plan, whatever it may be.

Life can be so complicated sometimes, especially where talking cats are involved.

At first, Baron remained completely expressionless, and gave no hint that he had put anything into motion. The farther they got from the palace, the more Haru began to wonder when they were going to make the move, whatever that move was. Let's not go there again.

Finally, once they were a good distance away, Baron looked over at Muta. He didn't say a word, just nodded slightly.

Muta grumbled. "You owe me big fer this."

With that, Muta began walking in the opposite direction. The Cat Guards, quite naturally, did not react well to this at all. "Where are you going? The exit is in that direction!"

But Muta just ignored them, and continued walking away.

"Are you listening to me?" the Guard asked with annoyance. "We are to escort you to the exit! Deviations will not be tolerated! Get back here at once!"

"Naw, I don't think so," Muta said. "In fact, I think I'd much rather… go and eat all of the fish in the lake again!" And with that, Muta bolted off at again-impossible speeds.

To say that the Guards were alarmed would be an understatement. "After him! We can't let him have our fish! Not again!"

The two Guards pursued. As they considered the great criminal Renaldo Moon to be a threat of the highest priority, they gave little to no thought about abandoning their two other charges.

Which is exactly what the Baron had been counting on.

Haru just stood there, staring in astonishment. "So… that was the plan?" she asked. "That's what you were talking to Muta about earlier?"

Baron nodded. "I knew there was a slight possibility that our help might be denied. So I told Muta that, if the situation arose, he would have to offer a 'diversion'."

A sly smile crossed Haru's face. "So you've tricked him into being bait again!"

Baron shrugged, and gave his own sly smile. "It's worked well in the past. And if something works, you should go with it."

She laughed. She knew it was rather rude to make light of Muta's predicament, but she couldn't help herself. "But what happens if he gets caught?" she asked, temporarily regaining her wits.

"Oh, Muta rarely ever gets caught," Baron said matter-of-factly. "It's what makes him so valued a proxy."

Haru laughed again. Oh, poor Muta! He never seems to catch a break in these things. Listen to me, I'm starting to sound like a fanfic reviewer!

"In any case," Baron continued, "he will keep them busy for quite some time. And it is that time that you and I shall use to get to the bottom of these disappearances. Shall we?"

Haru nodded. "Mm-hm. Lead on." I just hope that Muta can keep running.


Hiromi couldn't keep running.

This was the longest and fastest that she had ever run. She was quite athletic, and fear can be quite a contributing factor when it comes to locomotion. She didn't look back. She hadn't even stopped when one of her shoes came off.

But sooner or later, fatigue will take its toll, and Hiromi found that this was one toll she didn't have exact change for. After passing one more corner, she and the equally exhausted Natoru just had to risk stopping so as to catch their breaths. Both of them just collapsed with their backs leaning against one another.

"I… I think… think we lost them," Natoru panted.

Hiromi looked behind them, wiping some sweat-soaked strands of hair away from her eyes. It sure didn't look like their pursuers were still following. And now it was time for some Q-&-A. "So, uh… so just… who were those guys anyway? I've… never seen cats like those before."

"Well… that's probably because they're not cats," Natoru corrected. "They're kats."

"Kats?" This made no sense to Hiromi at all. "I don't get it. What are kats?"

Natoru prepared to explain, but another voice answered for him.

"Who are we? We are the future."

Almost in perfect sync, the duo looked up to find another 'kat' standing atop the labyrinth wall. Again, simply looking upon this creature was enough to steal the warmth from Hiromi's soul, and in an instant, the sweat on her brow became the cold sweat of fear.

The kat looked forward, placed its 'paws' around its 'mouth' and began crying out: "Woem! Woem! Woem! Woem!"

For a moment—and only a moment—Hiromi's fear was temporarily supplanted by befuddlement. "Woem?"

And then—faster than you can say 'over the weight limit'—Hiromi and Natoru found themselves being carried away by an entire swarm of kats.

It was a scene that, unbeknownst to many at the time, had been happening repeatedly for a year, and more so in recent months. The kats had always managed to claim their victims without leaving any evidence, or having any witnesses. They believed this time to be no different than the others.

They were wrong.

This time, there was evidence. There was a witness.

Such things have a way of complicating matters.

Especially where talking cats are involved.

To be continued

Well I must say that this chapter turned out a whole lot better than I expected! And the next one should prove more interesting still.

However, you should know that I've decided not to post the next chapter until I receive at least five reviews for this one. It pains me to have to resort to such underhanded tactics, but the lack of reviews I've gotten for the last few chapters has been rather irritating. Any feedback at all would be most appreciated.