Chapter 9- Metal Deposit/ Kaman Must Die

That morning was one of the worst I've ever had from the start. I got to wake up at four o'clock in the morning to a raspy rooster. Since that raspy beast was the worst form of an energizer bunny he kept rasping and rasping and rasping and rasping. Therefore, I rolled out of bed and stumbled downstairs to find a pair of earmuffs. Only then did I find out we were so poor we sold our only earmuffs in a garage sale years ago. I gave up my search and decided to eat some cereal. Comfort food is always the solution.

When I opened the box of Cap 'n' Crunch the bottom fell out, leaving me to hold and empty box. I examined the mess. A hundred yellow pieces of pure cornstarch. I kicked all the ones I could find into a corner. Where they wouldn't be seen for years due to my family's lack of cleanliness. I shrugged and trounced to the television. Too bad the only things on at four in the morning were product endorsers.

'This vacuum is for YOU!'

'Try our new paperclip, invented by a navy seal!'

'Who can live without a custom made doghouse? Only a hundred and ten dollars!'

I turned the television off and scouted food. In the end I was content with a few graham crackers. When I was done with my feast I could barely hear the rumble of an engine over the raspy rooster. I knew exactly who it was. I forced my lazy feet up the stairs and got dressed quickly. By the time I'd gotten down the stairs again I could hear three faint knocks on our door. When I opened the door I was partially out of breath.

Me: Hello.

Cole: Hi. Why are you wearing regular clothes? Don't you have to go to work today?

Me: Well, my parents are keeping me home today…we have plans at eight.

Cole: I'm sorry to interrupt, but would you care to come with me on a treacherous journey to the metal deposit center for a little while?

Me: How long will it take?

Cole: Not that long, maybe only half an hour.

I heard my mom stumble into the kitchen counter.

Mom: Melinda Sordino! What have you done to the floor!

I smiled at Cole and scribbled on a post it that I would be back soon and taped it to the door.

Me: Let's go.

He wasn't hesitant. We were out of the driveway in seconds and I watched Cole drive all the way to the metal deposit never taking a moment to look at the scenery. Somehow the ride wasn't long. I wished it would've lasted longer in some ways. Cole's truck halted at the gates to the deposit. I could tell the gates weren't meant to be opened, they probably hadn't been opened in years considering the rusted locks tying the gates together. I gave Cole a questioning glance.

Cole: It'll be alright. Here.

He handed me a pack of cigarettes and his lighter. I wasn't feeling too stressed, but I could use a smoke. I quickly lit up and put the cigarette in my mouth. It was getting easier. I tossed Cole his items and followed him to the gate. Cole lifted me up and gently set me down so I was perched on the fence. He easily jumped the barrier and helped me over. I let out a puff of smoke and asked Cole what we were doing.

Cole: Sometimes I come here and just 'borrow' some metal. It's very useful when its melted down and reformed.

Me: By borrow you mean…

Cole: I intend to return everything I've used. Don't worry, every single thing I've borrowed will be in my will.

I chuckled helplessly. Cole got right to work, sifting through various metals. I slowly walked behind him and tried to mimic his actions. I'd stop and ponder over one particular piece and then walk away. It was quite entertaining once you got the hand of it. I hadn't known how much time passed, but suddenly Cole muttered something incoherent.

Me: What? Did I do something wrong?

Cole: No, it's not you. I lost track of time. You should've been home by now.

I shrugged. I didn't care if we had to cancel out meeting with Kaman, but I'd probably get lectured for an hour or so when I returned…If I returned. No. How could I even think like that? My family sucks, so what? Caleb's is much worse off. My family hasn't resorted to violence or threats, we're trying to work together. Whether that be Mom confiding in a therapist or me smoking, but we're trying. Knowing what Caleb had gone through made my stomach sick. He'd been beaten down so many times and this was still happening. I'd seen a large bruise on his arm while he was driving earlier. I forced myself to look out the window and stop thinking.

People killin', people dyin' Children hurt and you hear them cryin' Can you practice what you preach And would you turn the other cheek Father, Father, Father help us Send some guidance from above 'Cause people got me, got me questionin' Where is the love (Love) Where is the love (The love) Where is the love (The love) Where is the love (The love) Where is the love (The love) Where is the love, the love, the love?

Black eyed peas- where is the love?

Then, we were at my house. Cole offered to explain to my parents where I had been, but I forbid him to leave the vehicle. I watched as he drove away. My cigarette got stamped into the ground and I walked into my house where certain death lurked. Why am I so afraid to enter my own house lately?

My parents were smiling and sitting on the family couch when I entered. Had the anger flowed out of them and they'd been so worried about me that they forgave me and could only feel love at this moment? In. My. Dreams.

Mom: We're going right now.

That fake smile was still froze to her face. She stood up, along with my father, and walked me to the family car. My hands were over my ears, I couldn't stand the silence, it was maddening. I admit I was almost happy to hear the elevator music playing in the mall. Almost.

'Why, hello Melinda!' That evil abomination cheered. I took each step slowly with my back shrugged and my head down. When I entered the room I saw my parents sitting in two fold up chairs against the wall, which left the one large chair across from Kaman's desk where I had sat before. Great, this was about me. My mind droned on while my parents elaborated everything and in return received a few subtle head nods. That moment I wanted to march up to the main desk in the waiting room and demand a refund, because face it, who can afford to tell a stranger their problems for thousands of dollars and no answers?

Kaman: Melinda!

Me: [whisper] Yes.

Kaman: Care to answer the question?

Me: No.

Mom: You can't just say no!

Dad: Ugh.

Kaman: Now, now. Settle. This is a trustworthy environment and if Melinda does not want to trust me with her feelings she doesn't have to. This is a free place. I can only encourage people to let it out.

Jeez! What the heck! Where was all this crap coming from? A soap opera! If anyone bought this they were complete fools. Sure enough, my parents were nodding solemnly. Okay, this had to stop.

Me: That's a ton of bull-

Mom: Melinda!

Me: Who cares, I've heard enough of your colorful vocabulary to teach me when and how to use it. Believe it or not I am a young adult and at this point nothing can stop me from moving out and escaping to some kind of art institute!

Mom laughed. Dad's eyes widened. Kaman looked impressed.

Mom: Go! Leave right now.

I took a deep breath and stood up. This had to be profound.

Me: Mom, I cannot believe this. You were always the one to keep things balanced or at least pay for the food, but now that you're on this whole therapist thing we have absolutely NO money at all! This helps no one. Dad just sits around like frozen putty and I have no point in this. If this is about the eighth grade, you should know I had to deal with everything alone. I am doing better…well, I was, until Kaman some into my life. Oh, and dear Doctor ANDREW Kaman, you aren't even worth an insult!

I stormed out of the office with rage. Then, took a long and proud stride to the main hall. Instantly it hit me. First tears began to fall and then Dad came running to me. I wasn't aware that I'd fallen down until he had picked me up. Instead of throwing me down and threatening to lock me in my room like an infant he plainly set me down and spoke softly.

Dad: You need a break from everything. I understand. I'm not good at this sort of thing, but here.

I was handed ten dollars and a folded note. My eyes were still streaming. He approved of this. He was allowing me to run away. Though the ten dollars wouldn't get me far, it was still something. I gave him a bear hug and jogged outside. The last thing I saw of him was the movement towards the town doughnut shop. I smiled. We used to get doughnuts when we had nothing better to do. There was nothing like a powder white form of dough to end a day.

I turned to face the mall, took a few steps back and saw the room. The very room I'd just stormed out of. The blinds were open to the city exhaust and I could see everything clearly. Silently, but clearly.

At first my mother looked worried, or maybe afraid. The next thing visible from the window was Kaman. He suddenly crushed himself into my mother. He wasn't hugging her he was… I quickly turned around. All of a sudden everything blurred together. Nothing seemed right. My eyes averted themselves rapidly from every object they set upon. My feet kicked in and I was running. People were staring at me. I didn't care. They already thought wrong of me. Might as well confirm their guesses. I was helpless.

Before I knew it I was in front of 'Small Fry'. I burst through the doors the same way I had at the mall. I searched for Cole and found him out back. There was a pack of smokes in his hands, but his mouth was empty. I shut the back door and ran to him.

Cole: Melinda, what are you doing here? Did your family thing-

I cut him off.

Me: Let me.

My hands reached behind his head and I thrust myself at him. He responded immediately to my actions. He was on his feet now and his hands ran up ad down my back. There wasn't any space between our bodies. This was what I needed. My mind needed a break away from everything and this was the answer, Cole. My hands slowly moved down, but when they reached the small of his back he stopped me.

Cole: I can't do this Melinda.

Me: Why not?

Cole: I just can't. Not now.

First, my head fell, then, my body.

I have felt for sure last night That once we said goodbye No one else will know these lonely dreams No one else will know that part of me I'm still driving away And I'm sorry every day I won't always love these selfish things I won't always live... Not stopping... It was my turn to decide I knew this was our time No one else will have me like you do No one else will have me, only you You'll sit alone forever If you wait for the right time What are you hoping for? I'm here I'm now I'm ready Holding on tight Don't give away the end The one thing that stays mine Amazing still it seems I'll be 23 I won't always love what I'll never have I won't always live in my regrets You'll sit alone forever If you wait for the right time What are you hoping for? I'm here I'm now I'm ready Holding on tight Don't give away the end The one thing that stays mine You'll sit alone forever If you wait for the right time What are you hoping for? I'm here I'm now I'm ready Holding on tight Don't give away the end The one thing that stays mine...

Jimmy eat the world-23

(Whoa! Okay, if you guys didn't think there was emotion in the chapter you are all robots. Sorry for it's long wait and its short length, but I really like this chapter, I have no idea why, maybe because I really like the music I was listening to while I was writing this… anyway… oh yeah, and you guys should know I wrote this fresh, took me a while but I finished and I like it. Never would've expected Mom to hook up with Kaman did you? Well, that's me, randomness…peace/\love\/see ya!