Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail
IX - I'll be Here to Hold Your Hand
"Mom… I… I don't know what to choose."
"I know, sweet girl." Layla's fingers brushed against Lucy's cheek. "I know."
"I… I don't want to leave my friends behind, that's true. But…" But it had been so long since she'd felt her mother's touch. So long since she heard her voice. It was so soothing and comforting and so familiar. Being here, being with her mother, it made her think that maybe her time had finally come. Maybe it was okay to die.
But then somewhere in the back of her mind she could imagine her friends' tears, all of Fairy Tail mourning her loss. Even if she wouldn't be there to witness her funeral, she could see Levy's tear stained cheeks. Wendy would never forgive herself for Lucy dying on her watch. Gray would lose yet another important person to him. Erza would feel like she failed to protect her. Mirajane would blame herself for the whole mess in the first place, considering she's the one who sent Natsu and Lucy on the job. And Natsu…
For some reason she pictured him the most heartbroken of them all. Kneeling at her grave and cursing her for giving up as the tears flowed down his face. Gray or Erza would try to pull him away but he'd never let them take him. "LUCY I KNOW YOU CAN HERE ME!" He'd scream, "Do you think your parents would want this!?" He'd point at her parents' graves beside her own. "Do you think we wanted this!? Fairy Tail needs you Luce! You can't leave us!" Finally their friends would manage to drag him away, but not without a scene.
"That boy loves you."
Lucy turned her head to the side as the image of her funeral faded, looking away from her mother. "Only as family…"
"Lucy, there is only one kind of love, it's just bigger or smaller. Loving someone as family is still the same love as loving a friend, one just feels bigger. The same goes for the love between two people, a couple. It's the same love as a family, but it's so big that it feels like all the loves made into one. You can still love someone as your family but also feel that romantic love. Sometimes they go hand in hand. Natsu, he hasn't yet realized how big his love for you is, and that it encompasses all of the loves in one. You too Lucy."
"M-me?"
Layla nodded. "You haven't realized that you love Natsu all the ways. As a friend, as family, and as a lover… Your love for each other is just so vast that you can only see one at a time right now, it takes practice and time for you to see them all at once."
"Is… is that what it was like for you and dad?" Lucy was somewhat hesitant to further breach the topic of her father. Her mother laughed lightly.
"Your father was almost as oblivious as that dragon slayer of yours at one point. But yes, that's what our love was like."
"That's kind of hard to believe…" Lucy laughed a little, trying not to frown but it was obvious Layla knew what she was thinking.
"Your dad didn't come because he didn't want to see you, not yet."
"W-why..?" Lucy felt like it was the past all over again but her mother soothingly cupped her cheek, smiling.
"He wants you to live your future before you see each other again. He regrets how he acted in the past, but he would never trade your future just to make up for those regrets." Layla paused, closing her eyes, "I wouldn't either. It's not my choice it's yours, but if it was mine... I would wake you up."
Lucy's eyes watered, tears beginning to spill over the corners and rolling down the sides of her face and over her ears.
"Shhhh…" Layla wiped the tears away from her daughter's eyes, "It's alright. Someday you'll understand." She cupped Lucy's face with her hands. "You'll have children too eventually, and their lives will matter more than anything else in this world. You'll do anything to protect them, to keep them alive, even if it means you'll never see them again."
"W-what if I don't want kids?" Lucy laughed a little through her tears, that was probably the funniest joke she'll ever tell. Of course she wanted kids. She wanted to live and get married and have a family and be with her friends. She wanted to see Natsu's cocky grin every day. Plus she still had a novel to finish. There were so many things she wanted to live for. She just didn't want this to be the last time she saw her mother's face.
But she made her choice.
"I'll miss you…"
"You don't have to. Your father and I both are always with you, in your heart, watching over you."
"M-mom…" Lucy sniffled, she could see tears in her mother's eyes too. "I love you…"
Her mother leaned down, pressing a kiss to her daughter's forehead. "I love you too, my Lucky Lucy." Her mother's echoed as Lucy closed her eyes. Slowly, the voice began to change, become more frantic, the words were rearranged and molded.
"You hear me, Luce? I love you so you can't die!" Natsu..? "Please don't die…"
Lucy's sobs turned into gasps for air. Her eyes weakly opened to the scene before her.
Wendy was hunched over beside her, looking pale and worn out, but she could feel the small girl's healing magic seeping into her tattered body. Happy was bawling his eyes out as Erza squeezed him like a lifeline. Carla, was screaming for Wendy to stop, that Lucy was awake. Selene sat beside her, looking terrified. Gray's face showed the relief and shock and tears that she couldn't remember seeing before. And Natsu… She was laying in his lap, no, he was cradling her. Clinging to her body for dear life, but his hold was gentle enough that she didn't feel crushed. His forehead was pressed to hers and his words still rang in her ears, "I love you so you can't die!"
"Na…tsu…"
She heard his breath catch in his throat when she spoke his name, something warm and wet fell on her cheek. He's crying? She was sure if she had the strength she'd cry too. She'd throw her arms around his neck, holding him so tight he wouldn't be able to move, and cry. She'd cry over the fact she was alive, she'd tell him how much she loves him too, how she's so sorry for the things she said and how she acted. But she couldn't do that, her body was weak and there was a pain in her stomach where she'd been stabbed. So she settled for Natsu's tears that dripped onto her cheek as he held her.
"I… I didn't a-ask for… a bath… N-Natsu…"
He choked out a laugh, his hold on her tightening a bit but releasing when she winced in pain. "Sorry, y-you looked like ya needed one, L-Luce…" He didn't bother to wipe his eyes or stop crying for that matter, in fact it didn't seem like he was going to let her go any time soon.
Erza cleared her throat, wiping her own eyes free of tears. "A-alright! W-well now that Lucy is awake we should get her properly treated! Happy, Carla, fly ahead and fetch Porlyusica!" Erza was quickly back in leader mode, but her eyes were still red from crying.
"A-aye!" Happy wiped his eyes, in fact everyone seemed to have been crying. "You're not a burden on them, Lucy." Her mother's words echoed in her head once more.
As the two Exceeds took off Erza turned her attention to the next smallest member of the team. "Wendy, will she be alright if you take a break?"
"I…" The girl seemed reluctant to so much as ease up on her healing magic, but slowly she lowered her hands, her head drooping with exhaustion. Lucy could really feel the pain now that Wendy's magic was no longer flowing through her, but she knew the sky dragon slayer could only hold out for so long. "I-I think she'll be okay for a little while… So long as she's conscious…"
Erza looked back to Natsu, her eyes glancing at his back for a moment. "Can you carry Lucy?"
"Of course I can carry her!" He scoffed, making sure to gently wrap one arm under her knees and keep the other behind her back, lifting her up slowly. It hurt. Oh god it hurt, but she was too exhausted to complain about the pain, instead letting her head lull against his chest. His heart beat was frantic and loud.
Gray offered to carry Wendy on his back since she was so tired, the girl protested at first, until Erza insisted so she could have her rest.
"Thank you… Wendy…" Lucy managed to choke out, earning a teary eyed smile from the girl as Gray lifted her onto his back.
"Y-you're welcome. What are friends for?"
"You gotta stay awake now, L-Luce okay?" Natsu's voice was low and still wavering from crying, but his tears had dried. He was trying to be strong for her. "Until we get back to the guild so the old lady can fix you up."
"Okay…" She forced a weak smile, but she didn't know if she'd be able to stay awake for the whole journey back. She wasn't exactly sure how far the village was from Magnolia. She'd been unconscious coming her in the first place.
"Hey, what are we gonna do about the houses? The villagers could be back any minute!" Gray piped up.
"Once we get Lucy back to the guild we'll get someone to come out here for damage control. We don't have time to worry about that right now though, Lucy's life is top priority."
"I know that!" Gray huffed.
"We have a carriage outside of the village, Lucy, don't worry we'll have you back in no time." Erza assured before turning and saying something quiet to Selene. Lucy felt her prince charming shiver a little.
"Crap…" He muttered under his breath. She felt a small smile creep onto her lips as he carried her towards said carriage. Normally he'd probably volunteer to walk, but she had a feeling he didn't plan on leaving her side. Even if motion sickness was involved.
She managed to stay conscious long enough for them to get her into the carriage, her head resting in Natsu's lap. His face was already turning green but he seemed to be trying to keep his composure. Wendy and Gray sat across from them.
"Thanks… guys…" She muttered, before her eyes slowly started to drift close. She heard Wendy hop up, and the calming feeling that her healing magic brought.
"Come on Lucy stay awake!" Gray called out, but that was the last thing she heard before the world went dark again.
Except this time she didn't see her mother.
Hunger was extremely painful right now. Painful enough to wake her up from her deep sleep. As she slowly became more aware of the world around her, she realized she was laying comfortably in her own bed with the covers tucked around her. She felt the tight bandage wrapped around her middle and a slight tug at her stitches when she would breathe. There was something else she felt too, her right hand was warm. Slowly turning her head, eyes barely open, she saw what made it so warm. There was another hand holding hers. It belong to a boy with fluffy pink hair whose head lay on his arm as he snored. His butt firmly situated in a chair from her table that he must have dragged over to her bedside. It was strange to see him so unscathed after something like this, she wondered if his back was alright.
Her hand squeezed his gently, but it was enough to make him shoot up awake. Funny, considering usually she could never get the idiot to wake up when she wanted him to.
"Lucy!" He looked at her worriedly but relaxed when she smiled at him.
"Good morning, Natsu…"
"Heh… uh yeah, mornin' Luce." He coughed and cleared his throat, he almost pulled his hand away but she held it a little tighter.
"Are you the only one here..?"
"Well, Erza and Wendy were here but they left to grab some food from the guild, since apparently you have none here. I don't know how long they've been gone now, but they should be back soon-"
"You weren't hungry too?" She tried to sit up but she winced at the pain and decided against it.
He scratched the back of his head, looking to the side. "Um, well… Actually I'm starving…"
Lucy's eyes widened a little, he'd foregone food in order to stay by her side? What kind of world had she woken up to?
He cleared his throat. He was acting so awkward, it was kind of adorable. "You've been asleep for a long time, Luce, you should probably be hungry too…"
"That's… actually why I woke up…" She remembered the pain in her stomach that was thanks to her hunger. "It's… hunger isn't actually a pleasant feeling right now."
He jumped up, "I'll go see if there's something in your kitchen!"
She watched him scurry off. Hadn't he just said there was no food here? She was pretty sure herself she hadn't gone grocery shopping before leaving for that "job", but… Was he avoiding her? The way he'd been acting so awkward almost made it seem that way. Was there another reason behind it?
He wasn't gone long before he returned with a stale muffin. At least she assumed it was stale. She'd baked them the day before she left which meant it should still be good, but she didn't know how long she'd been unconscious for. "Is this good enough?"
Her stomach twisted with hunger, answering that question for her. "Yes. Thank you, Natsu."
He handed her the muffin. She carefully took a bite. Okay it wasn't fresh but at least it wasn't stale. So she'd not been asleep for too long. She watched as he stared at the muffin, obviously hungry. "Natsu… there should be more in there I didn't just bake one muffin-"
"That's the last one." He coughed, eyes shifting to the floor. "I may have already eaten the others, okay?"
She couldn't help it. She laughed. It was a little painful thanks to her injury but she couldn't stop. He glared at her a bit but it was the kind of glare that said I wish I could be mad at you but who are we kidding?
Then it occurred to her. "When did you eat them?"
"When we brought you here yesterday morning."
So he'd eaten every single muffin but one, and not touched it the entire time even when he was starving. He'd even said there was no food in her house, which was why the others had left. Had he… had be been saving this muffin for when she woke up?
That made her feel warm inside. She broke off the bottom half of the muffin and handed it to him. He looked at it for a second. "Just eat it, dummy." He grumbled a thanks before snatching the muffin bottom and taking a grumpy bite. She giggled.
After he'd finished it, which wasn't a very long time, he coughed. "Hey Luce… About…" He scrunched up his face a little, "About when you woke up… you know after the whole getting stabbed in the stomach. How much… how long had you…"
"How long had I been awake?" Now it made sense, he was wondering if she'd heard him confess his feelings. That's why he was acting so awkward. Of course, Lucy, you idiot!
"Natsu…"
"Y-yeah..?"
"I… I love you too." Oh god. It felt like the world's heaviest weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. Not only the fact she'd finally, by herself, told him how she felt, but because she added "too" at the end. Her feelings were not one sided. He loved her and she loved him too.
Natsu let out a huge breath, like he'd been holding it since he first said those words. "Heh… so you did hear. Well, guess that's that."
"That's that."
He cleared his throat. "So uh… what now..?"
In her hopeless romantic mind this is the part where she'd always imagined that he'd kiss her or sweep her off her feet or something prince charming, even knowing that wasn't really the way Natsu acted. But she wasn't really sure she wanted him to do things like that anyways. Natsu? Prince charming? Really trying to picture that was strange. She'd settle for cheesy hugs and him messing up her hair by giving her a noogie, maybe she'd kiss him on the cheek.
Of course as she thought about this she hadn't notice him get closer, his chair somehow moving several inches closer to where her head was laying. She didn't notice until she realized his face was getting closer to hers.
"N-Natsu..?"
His face was pure concentration with a blush dusting his cheeks. She blushed as well. Is he really going to kiss me? She gulped, slowly closing her eyes, waiting for their lips to meet.
"Natsu we're back!" Wendy called out softly, obviously unaware that Lucy was now awake. Of course her soft voice was enough to startle Natsu and Lucy both, he moved away from her so fast he fell backwards in his chair. Erza poked her head through the door.
"What on Earthland are you doing, Natsu, you'll wake-"
"H-hey guys…" Lucy sheepishly waved from the bed, her face was burning red. They hadn't kissed but… but they had been so close.
"Lucy! You're awake!" Erza's eyes widened a little.
Natsu pushed himself up off the floor, grumbling to himself. Lucy smiled at him then looked back at the other two. "Heh… Yeah it seems so. How long was I asleep?"
"Almost three days." Wendy said, walking over to where Lucy laid in bed, "How do you feel?"
"Three days..?" She blinked, no wonder she was so hungry.
"We didn't know if you would be waking up anytime soon but Mirajane wanted us to bring this back for you." Erza held up a large brown paper bag. Lucy assumed it was full of food. The fact Natsu's mouth practically watered confirmed it for her.
"Thank you so much guys. I'm starving."
"Thank you guys, you really didn't have to take care of me like this." With Erza's help, Lucy had been able to sit up comfortably in bed. Wendy came out from the kitchen with a freshly made sandwich on a plate. Natsu stared at it hungrily, lips making a pout.
"We want to. And you're not exactly fit to walk around right now." Wendy laughed a little uneasily.
"That's… a good point…" Lucy sighed, how long was she going to have to stay in bed?
"Don't worry! We'll take care of everything that needs to be done while you recover!" The blue haired girl said, trying to cheer up the blonde.
"Eheh, thanks guys. Really I feel like I owe you more than you owe me." Lucy scratched the back of her head.
Erza shook her head. "Nonsense."
"You saved us." Wendy smiled a bit, "Well, me at least. Natsu told me."
"I… I did..?" She looked at him and he looked away.
"You pushed me out of the way when that Perry woman tried to kill Selene."
I did? When did I..? Lucy's memory was so hazy from when she was under Theia's control. She knew she'd been able to think while Theia was in her body, but she was pretty sure she hadn't been able to make herself move.
But was it possible that she'd willed Theia to push Wendy out of the way?
"The way you looked when you did it." Everyone looked at Natsu. "It looked like the real you, not Theia in your body." He shrugged. "I just figured you got control for a minute."
"You saved them though. You're not a burden on them, Lucy." Is that what her mom had meant when she said she saved them? Had she really gotten control of herself long enough to save Wendy?
"It's a nice thought." Lucy smiled, "I'd like to think it's true. I mean… I could hear her every thought, maybe she heard mine? I… I honestly don't remember much from the whole experience." She looked down. "I just… I seem to be able to remember all the bad things… Like-" She clenched her fists. "Hurting you Natsu, letting Loke blow up those homes, and letting Wendy get kidnapped too-"
"Don't you dare blame yourself for that." Natsu's voice was almost harsh and startled her a bit as she looked up. "You didn't do any of those things. That was all Theia."
"But it was my fault for-"
Erza interrupted her. "Whatever reasons you had for agreeing to let her use your body don't matter now. It's all taken care of. We even got word from the Magic Council that Theia is locked up in prison now. No one has to worry about her anymore."
"And I'm alright too, Lucy. I wasn't even trapped for long." Wendy scratched her cheek, laughing a bit. "It… actually wasn't really hard to get free."
Lucy sighed, looking at her sandwich, finally taking a bite from it.
"How did you get free anyways? I was wondering that." Erza sat down at the table. Natsu's stomach growled and pouted even more. "You know you can go make yourself a sandwich too, Natsu..?" It was like he'd been waiting for permission, he bolted off to the kitchen. How odd. Lucy thought.
Wendy took a seat on the sofa, putting a finger to her lips. "Well, I suppose it helped that Selene found me. Apparently the celebration the village was having had moved to the neighboring town, and Selene had been on her way there when she heard the commotion from the village. I suppose that was about the time that Loke started to destroy buildings.
"We talked for a little bit and she told me about Theia's magic as we tried to think of how to get me free. I thought I heard someone outside so I asked her to go check and it turned out to be Happy flying around. He quickly fetched Carla and Gray to come help."
"That reminds me, where are they? Happy and Carla?" Lucy asked.
"They're back at the guild with Panther Lily." Erza said.
"Oh." She turned back to Wendy. "Sorry for interrupted, please continue."
"It's alright! Hmm… what happened next? Oh! So Gray managed to fashion a key out of ice to unlock my handcuffs. The explosions were getting closer and Selene was getting frightened. So we decided that it would be a good idea to find and stop Loke before anymore damage was done.
"The explosions didn't make it hard to find him. He was confused at when we told him that it wasn't really you who'd summoned him. Of course insisting that it was impossible for anyone else to use his key. Fortunately since Selene had told me about Theia's magic I was able to explain it to him. He apologized for being tricked and said he'd go back and warn the other spirits before Theia had a chance to summon them, then forced his gate closed by himself."
"So that's explains why he stopped." Erza sat back, crossing her arms. "It really was an easier battle than you'd think, considering Lucy's injuries."
"That's because we weren't counting on Perry to try and murder Selene." Wendy added.
"Why… Why did she do that..?" Lucy asked.
Erza's brows furrowed, "I fear that may have been my fault. I think I went to far when stalling her and hit an emotional nerve. It seemed she had some negative feelings towards Selene, possibly because Theia appeared to care more for the child than for her so called sister."
"That's terrible…" Wendy frowned.
There was a knock on the door, but before anyone could get up it opened, Gray waltzing on in without invitation. Lucy sighed. It seemed like they would always barge in on their own terms. Of course, she might miss it if they stopped. Except… he wasn't alone.
"Oh! Gray I was just talking about you a moment ago." Wendy said, scooting over on the sofa to make room. "How is the village doing?"
He scratched the back of his head. "Well things could be better, a good chunk of the homes were destroyed. But most people are just thankful no one was there. A lot of 'em weren't surprised Theia was the one who did it all." He looked up, noticing Lucy sitting up in her bed. "Lucy! Hey, kid, look she's fine see?"
That was when the purple haired girl stepped out from behind him, but still held on tightly to his pants leg. "Miss Lucy?"
"Selene!" Lucy smiled, happy to see the girl was alright. Well, mostly. She still seemed like she was in a state of shock. Gray either didn't notice this or didn't care as he walked into the apartment, leaving the poor girl at the door. She quickly followed after, but paused in front of the sofa, not sure if she should sit down. "You can come sit on the bed with me if you want." Lucy offered.
The girl seemed to relax, "Are you sure?"
"Of course, come on, it's lonely over here." Lucy pat a spot on top of her comforter. Selene scurried over and climbed onto the bed, sitting close to celestial spirit wizard.
Natsu finally returned from the kitchen, his mouth stuffed with one sandwich and two others in his each of his hands. "Oh froopy eyesh ish 'ack."
"Don't talk with your mouth full, Natsu." Erza groaned.
He walked over to the bed and sat himself down with invitation. Selene and Lucy both looked at him, although Selene stared with admiration and Lucy with slight annoyance. He managed to stuff the whole sandwich in his mouth and swallowed. "Yeah, yeah. Don't be a stick in the mud, Erza." He grinned down at Selene. "You hungry, kiddo?"
"Y-yes!" Selene nodded, Lucy wasn't sure if the girl really was hungry or just saying so because she was eating a sandwich that Natsu made. There was something about the little girl that reminded her of herself, perhaps her adoration for Natsu was one of those things. Of course, Lucy's was a lot less obvious she hoped. "Thank you!" The girl gratefully took one of the sandwiches from Natsu, taking a small bite from it.
"That brings up another topic, where will Selene be staying? Was anyone in the village willing to take her in?" Erza looked to Gray.
He sighed, rubbing his temples. "No. They're all too absorbed in their own lives, even the ones who didn't have a home destroyed. Part of me doesn't find it too strange that Theia held a grudge of sorts against those people." He noticed Selene looking at him, then cleared his throat. "But they're not all so bad. Still, the ones who would be willing already had their hands full taking in homeless families thanks to Theia's damage."
"She could stay with Carla and I tonight since you had her last night, Gray." Wendy offered.
"I don't really care. The kid is pretty easy to live with." Selene smiled at that. "'Sides, she's kinda like a little Lucy."
"What?" Lucy blinked. Hadn't she just been thinking about how similar the girl was to her?
Gray shrugged. "I mean, who else did we know who was so eager to join Fairy Tail? Not to mention her personality is pretty similar."
Wendy giggled. "Was Lucy really that excited about joining Fairy Tail?"
The blonde blushed. "I-I mean…"
"You should have seen Lucy's face when she came up to me showing off her guild mark." Natsu piped up. "Biggest grin ever."
She couldn't believe that he remembered that. Her face went bright red. Selene looked up at her. "Is it true? Miss Lucy?"
She looked down at the little girl and smiled, "Yes, it was my dream to be a Fairy Tail wizard." She looked up at Natsu, "And it's thanks to that idiot I am."
"Wouldn't have it any other way, Luce!" He grinned.
A/N: You guys and your kind reviews. Really, y'all are so understanding. I've got the best readers in the world. As a reward you get the good end—well technically it was going to end up this way anyways—even though the end end isn't for another 2 chapters. It's just that I'm writing an alternate ending as well, the bad ending. (what is this an RPG?) Also I'm purposefully taunting my best friend Kayla by not letting them kiss this chapter. That's all she really wants is for them to kiss and live happily ever after. But I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, and I hope you liked my portrayal of Layla. As always, please leave a review telling me what you think! The end to this fic is drawing near, but there will be plenty more NaLu to follow!
EDIT: Thank you to Cassi0chan for pointing out the duplicate paragraphs! It's all fixed now!
